“Good as in really amazing sex? Or good as in relationship good.” Lori grabbed a cigarette, leaning back against the arm of the couch, long legs stretched out, dropping her feet onto Nikki’s lap.
“Relationship good, I think. And the sex part.” Nikki took a swallow of beer, the cool liquid sliding down her throat. The beer at Jax’s had been good, but something peaty and complex, like nothing she’d ever tasted. This was crisp and light and just what she wanted now.
Lori grinned around her cigarette. “You’re blushing. I haven’t seen you blush since…wait. I’ve never seen you blush. He must be pretty amazing.”
Nikki ducked her head, the heat in her cheeks intensifying. “Lori, it’s like nothing else…nothing I’ve ever known. No guy has been like this, not even the ones I thought were decent.”
“Does he have a really big cock?”
Nikki shook her head, grimacing. “Seriously, Lori? Don’t be crude.” She took another swallow of beer. “I’m not sure what it is about him though… I just don’t know.” She shrugged, blowing out a deep breath.
“You don’t know why the sex is so good?”
Nikki swatted at Lori’s feet, laughing. “Never serious, are you? It’s the other stuff…he actually listens to me when I talk. And the thing is, I want to talk to him, about things I never talk about.”
“Your parents?” Lori’s smile faded, her eyes suddenly serious. She blew out a thin stream of smoke before stubbing out her cigarette.
“Yeah. That. It was hard, but afterward, it felt…not good. But somehow it seemed right. Like he was supposed to hear it all for some reason. Like I was supposed to tell him.”
Nikki set her beer on the coffee table and slid down on the couch, she and Lori rearranging their legs to fit together. She started rubbing Lori’s foot, eliciting a deep sigh from the girl. They were quiet for a few minutes, outside sounds reaching Nikki, traffic noises, someone yelling down out in the hall, the slam of a door.
Nikki thought about Jax’s house, how quiet it was, how secure it felt. Big and solid and warm, like a fortress or a castle. So different than any place she’d ever lived, either growing up or now, on her own.
Lori stirred, not so subtly poking Nikki with her other foot. Nikki switched, rubbing the proffered foot. She glanced up. Lori had her eyes closed, head leaning against the back of the couch.
“You knew that, last night, didn’t you?”
Lori lifted her head. “Knew what? That he was going to be good in bed? Or good for you? Both, sort of.” Lori shrugged, frowning.
“He’s got something about him, like you say. Beyond the fuck-me good looks there’s something really genuine. And you, my dear, need someone genuine. Not like that guy…what was his name? The one that you found out had been married like three times? Jeff? Nick?”
“You really have a knack for making me relive all my bad memories, you know?” Nikki let go of Lori’s foot, sitting back.
“Yeah. I made bad choices. But maybe I don’t have to anymore.” She could hear the hesitancy in her voice. As soon as the words were out, she wasn’t sure it was what she’d wanted to say. Lori was her friend and she told her everything, but Lori sometimes took things the wrong way or got defensive.
Lori sat up, her eyes wide. “It’s that serious? That fast? Did he tell you he loves you?”
Nikki nodded.
“Holy shit. Wow. He’s the real deal then. You tell him you love him?”
Nikki shook her head. “No. Couldn’t do it. That’s for another day, another time.”
“And he was cool with that?”
“Yeah. Said he didn’t expect it. Just wanted me to know. Like, it was important for him to tell me, but not like he was demanding I feel the same. He seemed okay, more than okay, with me not saying it back.”
Lori sat up, setting her feet on the floor. She put her hand on Nikki’s leg. “You’ve got a rare find there, Nikki. Really rare.”
Nikki watched Lori closely, for that certain look that came with the bitchy sarcastic tone she’d get sometimes, but it wasn’t there. She sounded sincere. Something relaxed in Nikki, a bit of tension leaving her that she didn’t realize she was holding on to.
“You working tonight?” She half-hoped Lori would say no, but being shorthanded, Nikki was pretty sure Lori would be working.
“Yeah. Mack’s really not happy with you.”
“I’m sorry, Lori. It’s made it harder for you. I wasn’t thinking when I left.” Nikki bit her thumbnail. Lori reached out, taking Nikki’s hand away from her mouth.
“Stop that. Can’t blame you for quitting. Would’ve done the same thing. And yeah, Mack’s working my skinny ass off, but the tips are great. He’s hired some new girls too, not nearly as fun as you through. I slapped one on the ass and she complained to Mack.”
Nikki laughed. “What did he say?”
“He told her not to complain or he’d fire her. I seem to be the golden child at the moment, can do no wrong. I think it’s just because I’m still there, and I’m not causing trouble. For once.”
Lori stood. “I gotta take a shower. Make yourself at home. You want to spend the night?”
“That okay with you?” Nikki hoped the begging tone she heard in her voice wasn’t as evident to Lori.
“Yeah. Sure. You’re monogamous now, so I guess it’s going to be different, you know…sleeping with you, but you’re still my best friend.” She leaned over, kissing Nikki on the forehead.
“And for what it’s worth, I still love you, you know. But it’s probably different hearing it from a guy.”
Lori turned away quickly but before she did, Nikki caught the glint of tears in her eyes.
* * *
Bec was in the kitchen when Jax came downstairs, sitting at the table reading the newspaper. He looked up as Jax padded in barefoot and bare-chested in faded jeans. In the other downstairs rooms, Jax could hear other pack members talking, moving about. Someone was watching television in the big living room, occasional laughter drifting in to the kitchen.
Jax liked the feeling of having the pack around, the guys and their mates occupying many of the rooms on the second and third floors. He’d always known the pack’s close knit bond was strengthened by them sharing the big old house.
“Sleeping in these days? Or did you have another slumber party?”
Jax caught the tone in Bec’s voice, but decided to ignore it for now. He was still riding the high from being with Nikki and not even Bec’s jabs could bring him down.
“Late night. Any new information about the murders? Or anything else unusual happening in our fair city?” Jax stood in front of the open industrial-sized refrigerator, surveying the contents. He’d created two huge sandwiches for him and Nikki, both of them devouring them quickly.
But that had been hours ago and he was ravenous. And he was hungry for meat. There was a package of steak on the shelf and he pulled it out. Within in minutes, he had it sizzling in a pan, sliced onions in another.
“You want any of this?” Jax pointed at the stove. Bec looked up, frowned, and shook his head.
“No. I already ate.” He flipped through the paper. “There’s nothing new about the murders, just a rehash of what was here yesterday. No suspects, no real clues, just torn up bodies and one strangled stripper. And some report of a lady seeing a really large dog—she calls it a wolf—outside her house, let’s see, on the night of the full moon. But that’s way over in the suburbs, not around here. Could have been any one, from any pack, careless enough to be seen.”
Jax turned the steak, lost in thought for a moment. Something wasn’t right, something didn’t add up. The steak popped and sizzled in the hot pan as images of the alley rose up in his mind. He tried to push those of Nikki away, to focus on the rest of the alley, the dumpsters, the scents that were left behind.
And the fact that the thing had been in some kind of wolf form the night before the full moon. That was the biggest question in his mind. What exactly were they dealing
with? A werewolf? An actual wolf? Or something else, something they’d never encountered before? Something not bound by the moon, able to change at will? Or unable to change back?
“The strangled dancer. She wasn’t killed by whatever the hell that thing was. Right? Its scent was all over the alley, but I got the impression it was less where she’d been found. Like it had found her and dumped her, got her out of the way. And then killed the other two.”
He stirred the onions. “Nikki said the guy was stalking his ex, the other dancer.”
“I like how they’re dancers now, and not strippers. Is there really a difference?” Bec shook the paper again.
This time Jax wasn’t going to let it pass. “Do we have a problem here, Bec? Do we need to talk about something besides the murders? Because I’m getting real tired of your barbs. Last I heard, you were alpha male of your own pack. Which means you really have nothing to say about what I do…or who I do it with. Or what I call women from the club.”
Jax stood at the end of the table, fists balled on his hips. Bec looked up and Jax was startled by the scowl that darkened Bec’s face, the clenched jaw and flashing eyes.
“Do you really think this is how dad would have handled this? Or that he would have acted like this?”
“If you’re talking about Nikki, there’s a big difference. Dad had a mate...Mom. I don’t. I need a mate and I’m trying to change that, so this pack can have leaders and move on. If you’re talking about the murders, he would have taken the pack and gotten to the bottom of it. Which is what I intend to do, with or without your help.”
“Move on.” Bec shorted in disgust. “You sound like a therapist. We can’t really move on from what happened, can we?”
Jax turned back to the stove, snapping off the burners. His steak was charred on one side and he pried it out of the pan, dropping it onto a plate and dumping the still-raw onions over the top. The conversation had diminished his appetite and he looked at the plate, sighing. He spoke without looking up.
“They’re dead, Bec. Our parents are dead. I can’t change that. I would, if I knew how. But they were killed and we’re the ones left behind, left to pick up the pieces. To take care of the pack.” He left the plate on the counter and pulled out the chair across from Bec.
“But you’re the one who’s supposed to take care of the pack, Jax, not me. And you’re not taking care of it, not by bringing home a stripper to fuck. You know how things are…how they’re supposed to be.”
Jax regarded Bec sitting across from him, the defiant thrust of his chin, the challenge in his eyes. “You think I’m ruining the pack by wanting to take Nikki as a mate?”
“What? You’re actually serious about this? This is worse than I thought. Jax, come on… it’s never been like this…”
“Exactly. And because it’s never been like this, that we’re in serious trouble. Look, Bec, history is just that, history. I can’t live in the past and neither can you. Or, you can go live with your pack and do as you see fit and let me lead the rest. But if this pack is going to survive, things need to change. We can’t be elitist’s anymore.”
Bec pushed his chair back so suddenly it fell over. He stood over Jax, breathing heavily.
“You know, I don’t know you anymore, Jax. You’re not my brother.”
“Bec, I’m the same brother I always was. But I’m alpha male now, too.”
“No, you’re alpha male only.” Bec strode to the back door. “You’re not my brother anymore. And I miss my brother.”
The door slammed. Jax sat at the table, head in his hands. What exactly was he supposed to do with Bec? He, of all people, should realize the needs of the pack came before his own needs. That Jax needed to be alpha male before he was his brother. And finding a mate was part of being an alpha male.
He didn’t know what Bec thought any more, other than the obvious, that Nikki was the wrong choice for alpha female. And he knew the reason why Bec would think that. She was cheap, she was a stripper, and she danced for pay… for men. What kind of alpha female would that make?
To Jax though, it didn’t matter at all. What Nikki did for a living…he didn’t care. He got up, rubbing his hand across his face, stubble rasping beneath his fingers. He glanced at his dinner on the counter, hesitated briefly and then threw it, plate and all, into the trash.
His mood was soured. He needed a shave and wanted a shower and he headed upstairs, laughter from the living room following him.
* * *
Lori had left for work, promising to clean out Nikki’s locker at the club. She’d told Nikki to make herself at home, eat what she wanted and, if she felt at home enough, maybe do the dishes. Nikki had laughed, closing the door after the departing Lori.
But Lori’s refrigerator held no food that didn’t look or smell bad, and Nikki was hungry. She also really wanted a shower and change of clothes. It didn’t take long for her to decide to walk home, shower, change clothes and bring back some food for her and Lori. Nikki thought her refrigerator might have something more than Lori’s day’s-old selection of take-out.
The rain had returned and the sky was a mass of clouds, so low they looked like she could reach out and touch them. She pulled the collar of her jacket up around her neck and walked faster.
The outside door to her building was propped open, again. The damned kids in the building were too lazy to use their keys and the parents were too lazy to get up and buzz them in. Nikki had given up telling the super, after he’d tried to grope her in his basement office. She sighed and climbed the steps into the downstairs hall, which always smelled like boiled cabbage and cigarette smoke with a hint of stale beer.
On her floor, standing in the narrow hall in front of the apartment, she stuck the key in the lock. But before she could turn the key, the door swung open on its own. Her heart skidded in a panicked leap in her chest and she took a step back away from the door. Was it possible she’d forgotten to lock it the last time she left? She didn’t think so. She’d never forgotten to lock her apartment. It was second nature.
There were no noises she could hear, not like anyone was inside. The only sound she heard was from the next apartment, from old Mr. Feldman’s television set, turned up full volume. It somehow made her feel safe, in a totally ridiculous way, to know he was home. That he was totally deaf didn’t really seem to matter. Just knowing there was another human being on the other side of the door gave her a little courage.
Her living room looked the same, the short hall leading to her bedroom dark. She ventured cautiously inside, clutching her purse. Nothing looked disturbed. The kitchen was a disaster, but that was how she’d left it. Her muscles relaxed just a bit and she crept down the hall to her bedroom.
The door was open and she peeked inside, staying in the hall. The bed was messy, sheets trailing on the floor, again, exactly how it had looked before she left for work.
Taking a deep breath, she advanced slowly into her bedroom. Fear hummed through her, a tingle running down her spine. From here she could see into the bathroom, the shower curtain pulled back and most of the room reflected in the mirror above the sink. There didn’t appear to be anyone hiding in the shadows of the tiny room.
She stood in front of her closet, her heart jolting in her chest as she looked at the closed door. Everything she wanted was in that closet. She reached out, her hand on the doorknob. Should she jerk the door open or do it slowly?
Taking a deep breath, she yanked the door open, jumping to the side in anticipation of someone…something…jumping out. But no one did.
She let out a shaky breath and did a quick inventory. Her duffel bag was on the floor of the closet and she scooped it up, pulling shirts from hangers and jamming them inside, grabbing dirty laundry from the floor. The dresser was next and she pulled open drawers, grabbing handfuls of underwear and then tossing in several pair of jeans.
Lugging the duffel to the bathroom, she swept everything off the counter into the bag, quickly opening drawers and adding their
contents.
The longer she was in the apartment, the shakier her hands got. The sense of being on borrowed time, the overwhelming feeling she was being watched grew by the minute.
By the time she dragged the duffel back into the hall, her breathing was so shallow she was almost hyperventilating. She forced herself to take deep breaths as she locked the door, twisting the knob and ratting the door in its frame. Mr. Feldman’s television was still blaring and she stopped and listened for a minute. Finally she slung the duffel over her shoulder, almost running down the hall and stairs, and out into the rainy night.
It wasn’t until she was back at Lori’s that it hit her. The apartment had a smell, the same rotten garbage smell of the alley and her clothes the night of the attack.
She’d taken a quick shower and was sitting on the floor in Lori’s living room, rooting through the duffel bag, when her cell phone rang. Scrambling through the debris, she finally found her purse and dug out the phone.
“Hello?”
“Nikki? You’re all out of breath. You okay? Where are you?” Jax’s voice instantly grew concerned. Nikki leaned back against the couch, pushing aside her clothes.
“Yeah, just couldn’t find my purse. I’m at Lori’s. I just got back from my apartment, getting some things. Something odd happened, though.”
She could almost see him on the other end of the call, his dark brows furrowed together over his gray eyes, mouth in a straight line.
“What happened? Where?”
“At my apartment. The door was open and when I went in…”
“You went in? Why?”
“I needed clothes. I’m still wearing what I had on yesterday. Besides, no one was there.”
“Nikki, you should have called me.”
“Oh, yeah. Well, I…I didn’t think about that.”
She heard a deep sigh on the other end and cringed, expecting an angry tirade. But Jax’s voice was so quiet, so gentle, she was taken completely off guard.
“I know. It’s okay, baby. This is all new for you. But next time…well, let’s hope there isn’t a next time like this. But call me, okay? It’s what I’m here for, among other things.”
The Alpha's Touch Boxed Set (14 Book Bundle) Page 62
