Gentlemen Prefer Succubi

by Jill Myles

“Oh, I don’t,” I said, breathing hard.

  “I know,” he repeated, the smile looking a little more … forced at my adoring gaze. “Especially when I have heard of your situation and decided to help you.”

  “Help me? How?” My ardor turned to puzzlement. How in the world could an angel help me with my current situation? Unless … I slid a glance over to the confessional. “You mean … I thought angels didn’t do that.”

  “And how is it that you think Noah got into his predicament?” Uriel tilted his head at me like an inquisitive bird.

  “Sex?” I blanked for a moment. “Really?” Noah had mentioned that, come to think of it.

  Uriel leaned in, his voice soft. “It is not my story to tell, but perhaps you should ask your friend the next time you see him.”

  I noticed that the angel scrupulously avoided Noah’s name. I almost asked about it, then changed my mind. I didn’t want to make him angry. He seemed so … sweet. Wholesome.

  I wanted to do dirty, nasty things to the man. His scent was wonderful, like cookies and baby shampoo—an odd, but fresh combination. And he was leaning very close to me, his gaze intent on my face.

  “You shouldn’t lean in to me,” I warned him, recognizing the signs. “I’m sort of …” There wasn’t a delicate way to put it. In heat? About to tackle him in a fury of lust? I just pointed at my eyes, which I’m sure were bluer than his own. “You know … this.”

  He smiled and my heart melted. “It’s why I’m here.”

  I straightened in my seat, surprised. “You’re here for that? But you just said …” I frowned at the thought of helping an angel, well, fall. Word traveled fast in the Afterlife. “I’m not some sort of celestial hooker, thank you very much.”

  Uriel looked almost as offended as me. “You’ve misunderstood me.” He shook his head and put his fingers on my chin, pulling me closer. “Let me show you.”

  At his touch, my whole body throbbed, and I leaned in to the embrace. Instead of my lips, though, he brushed my forehead with a chaste kiss, and I pulled away in surprise. “You came here to do that?”

  The edges of his mouth pulled up in a faint smile. “You take too much at face value, Jacqueline. Tell me, do you feel any different?”

  I sat for a minute, thinking. My fingertips tingled, but that could be due to the fact that I was clenching my purse against my body. I set it down gently on the pew before me. “Am I supposed to feel different?”

  “No urges?”

  Gasp!

  He was right. The obnoxious throbbing between my legs that told me that I was about to go sex crazy again had stopped. Ceased. Gone. My breasts didn’t feel heavy and aching with need, and I could think clearly. I shot him a look of disbelief and jerked my purse open, rummaging through it for a compact. Sure enough, a quick look in the mirror showed my eyes bleached to the pale silver of Remy’s and Noah’s.

  I was cured!

  CHAPTER TEN

  Uriel’s next words shattered my hopes.

  “It’s a temporary reprieve, I’m afraid. The effect should last about a week, but I think you’ll enjoy it in the meantime.”

  “Hell, yeah,” I enthused, wincing at his grimace. “Oh, sorry. I keep forgetting who I’m talking to.” I stared at my forehead in the mirror. The spot where he’d kissed me glistened like it had been covered with glitter. I touched it, but it didn’t rub off. “Gosh, I don’t know how to thank you.” It was true—grateful couldn’t begin to describe how I felt at the moment. Not having to track down Noah in the next few hours sounded pretty darn great. Going to him for sex would have been humiliating, and I didn’t have any other likely candidates.

  “You could do me a favor.”

  Uriel’s slightly wheedling tone made me look up from my mirror. I’ll give him credit—his face was perfectly neutral, not showing a hint of any sort of interest, but I knew it was there, all right. I wasn’t born yesterday. Reborn, like maybe two days ago, sure.

  “A favor?” I was reluctant to ask, since I knew that I probably wasn’t going to be too keen on the idea, but the tingle on my forehead reminded me that he’d already made a gesture of goodwill toward me. The least I could do was hear him out.

  Uriel shook his head and smiled. “Nothing quite so dire as that, my dear Jacqueline. I promise.”

  I felt bad for doubting him. “Sorry. I’ve been a little touchy for the past few days, as I’m sure you know.” I couldn’t resist sneaking another peek into my mirror to look at my wonderfully washed-out eyes. “Ask away.”

  “I’m not sure how much Noah has told you about our kind. As an angel, I am bound to sacred grounds. I cannot go where the ground is not blessed, or is unhallowed.”

  “So you can’t leave this church?” He nodded and I promptly stopped feeling jealous of his beauty. Wow, that really sucked.

  “As one of the fallen Serim, Noah can visit both hallowed grounds such as this church, or ‘neutral’ territory like your city. He cannot visit unhallowed ground or someplace blessed by the darker side of nature. Do you understand what I am saying?”

  Oh, I understood all right, and I was scared. “I’m thinking you want me to go visit some voodoo temple or some graveyard, and I’m not interested.”

  His lips thinned into a narrow line. “You exaggerate as to what I ask. What I meant to say before I was … interrupted”—he leveled his best “I’m an angel of God and you’re not” look at me—“was that I need to know some information, and I cannot go where I need to find it.”

  Information? That didn’t sound too bad. Besides, I was starting to feel rather guilty with the kiss burning on my forehead and all. “What information is it?”

  “There are vampires in this city—the more extreme version of your friend Noah—who have chosen a darker path. If you have not already encountered them, I suspect you will very shortly.”

  Vampires? Oh dear. Remy had mentioned we were supposed to avoid them. “I don’t know …”

  “Vampires are immoral creatures, as you can imagine, and they are stirring like a black horde through this city. They follow a queen, an unholy demoness who they adore and worship. I believe she is planning something foul against our kind, and I must find out what it is.”

  “Whoa there,” I said, putting both hands in the air. “What the heck am I supposed to do against a flock of vampires and their demon queen?”

  Angels have amazing poker faces, I must say. He didn’t show any outward signs of annoyance with me other than a slight compression of his lips again, but I knew he was frustrated.

  “You will not have to go to anywhere dangerous. The vampires you wish to question congregate at several nightclubs in the city. All you need to do is get the information I seek. Do this for me, and you will receive another kiss, a longer-lasting one. You would be free from your obligation for a month, possibly longer.”

  No wonder Remy called them dealers. “Visiting a few nightclubs doesn’t sound too bad.” Something about this deal bothered me, though I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. “Don’t vampires eat people?”

  Uriel’s lips slid into a faint smile. “Jacqueline, the vampires would never hurt you.”

  I doubted angels could lie. “What makes you say that?”

  “Your kind fascinates them. You will not be harmed but welcomed.”

  Welcomed by vampires? Somehow, it didn’t sound enticing. “While I’d love to help you, I don’t know how I’d get the information you’re looking for. I doubt the queen’s going to confess her deep, dark secrets to me over a few martinis.”

  His soft smile became a bit strained. “A succubus has ways of getting information. You can find it in their dreams. That is the private territory of your kind alone.”

  “Dreams?”

  “Yes, dreams. You need only to control the dreams of a sleeping being and you can manipulate their subconscious. Have you never heard the tales your kind tell of succubi?”

  “You mean succubuses tell stories about other succubuses?” Jeez, my “kind�
� needed to get out more.

  “No.” I could hear his teeth grinding. “And the proper plural is succubi. I meant that humans tell stories of succubi—”

  “But I’m not human anymore—”

  Uriel put a hand to his forehead, as if being with me were the most stressful thing in the world. “Never mind. If you will not help me, I suppose we will not find what the evil in the city is up to until it is too late, and then the fate of all mankind will be upon your head, not mine.”

  Guilt shot through me like a cannonball. “What do you mean? People are going to die?” I asked as he stood and I tugged on his hand. “Don’t go. I want to help, I do.”

  “Do you truly?” He turned those brilliant blue eyes upon me again, his gaze the benevolent, yet ready-to-be-disappointed parent. “Do you wish to help us prevent a tragedy?”

  I couldn’t speak around the knot of anxiety in my throat, so I nodded.

  He leaned in and pressed his cheek against mine in a surprisingly tender gesture. “Then go and return here when you can tell me what they seek.”

  Then he vanished as if he were never there. He didn’t even leave behind a feather or a faint smell in the air. There was nothing to remind me that I had just spoken with—and irritated—an angel.

  I sat in the pew for a moment, my thoughts boiling, and then flipped open my compact again. In the mirror, the faint gleam of the kiss still shone.

  So it did happen. Now I just needed to go find some vampires.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  I managed to slink back into the studio just in time to see Remy wrap her silk robe around her body and head for her dressing room. I snagged a bottle of water off a nearby tray and followed her in, shoving my bangs down to cover the angel mark. Now to remember to be angry.

  “So where’d you run off to? I looked up and you were gone.” Remy’s silver eyes gleamed in the dim yellow light of the dressing room. “Don’t tell me you had to go to the bathroom in the middle of my big scene.”

  “Where do you get the nerve?” I began with that and immediately felt proud. It was a good start to standing up for myself.

  “Nerve for what?” She looked genuinely puzzled.

  “You’re a porn star! How could you not tell me? Did you think I wouldn’t notice?”

  “Oh, come on. How could you not notice? Did you see my DVD collection at home? I’m in half of them. And the name? Remy Summore? Ram-me-some-more? Get it?”

  “I thought your name was REM-me, not RAM-me.”

  She shrugged. “Remy is spelled prettier. Besides, it’s porn, not rocket science. Nobody cares how your name is spelled.”

  This whole conversation was just wrong on so many levels. I shook my head, words failing me.

  “Oh, come on.” She flopped down on the couch and tossed one of the tasseled pillows at me. “Don’t tell me you’re going to be a prude about this. You had sex in a confessional yesterday with a man you hardly know, so you can’t judge me. Besides, it’s a good way to make money and kill the Itch at the same time.” She shrugged at me, her dark hair cascading over her shoulder, looking as relaxed as could be surrounded by black silk and sex toys.

  My mouth opened and closed. She thought I was prudish? How could a succubus be prudish? I couldn’t think of anything to say, so I just said, “When can we leave?”

  “Right now, Miss Cranky-butt,” Remy said. “But you’ll disappoint James. He likes you, you know.”

  I shot her a dirty look.

  Remy smirked. “You sure you don’t want a souvenir DVD—”

  “Forget it.”

  I spent the rest of the day pretending to sulk in my room. That was much easier than trying to explain to Remy—or to Noah, for that matter—where I was planning to head that night. So I ignored Noah’s phone calls and Remy’s attempts at getting back in my good graces.

  Okay, so she didn’t really try to get back into my good graces, inasmuch as she sent room service up to me in the form of Ethel with delicious snacks. I wasn’t fooled, though. It was a peace offering, and I took the food but not the apology.

  After all, Ethel made incredible cheesecake brownies. No sense in sending those back. The brownies weren’t at fault.

  I passed the day watching bad daytime TV, eating food that would have put ten pounds on my thighs if my thighs weren’t supernatural, and picked through my wardrobe. What would be good for hanging out with vampires? I needed something that said I was at home there but didn’t want any funny stuff. Something that said “look but don’t touch.”

  I decided on a sweater set of pale pink that was somewhat low cut in the front and a pair of jeans. It was nice without being tarty, and it showed the right amount of cleavage. I brushed my hair for about an hour, admiring the way it curled and swept over my shoulders. It was fascinating and the most brilliant shade of red. Whether or not I cared for the whole succubus thing, I was shallow enough to admit that my new looks were stunning. I’d never been attractive before, and it was as interesting to me as it apparently was to the opposite sex.

  Grabbing my purse, I tucked my high heels in my hand and headed for the grand staircase that swept through the foyer of Remy’s ostentatiously huge house.

  Of course, who should I meet at the bottom of the stairs but Remy herself, in slippers and clutching a pint of Häagen-Dazs. Her brows furrowed as she stared at me. “Where are you going?”

  It figured that I’d get caught on the verge of making it out the door. Of course, I hadn’t thought very far ahead in my plan; I had no way to get to the city once I got out to the driveway. I guess every plan has to have its fatal flaw. “Er, nowhere.”

  She snorted. “Do tell.”

  “I’m going to the museum,” I lied. “To pick up my paycheck.”

  Remy approached me and poked me on my bare breastbone. “Dressed like that?” She scanned me with sharp eyes and began to circle like a vulture. “What look were you going for with this ensemble? Jeans, so something casual. Heels, which means there’ll be men there. A sweater set, which means you’re a dork.“ She studied me while eating a spoonful of ice cream. “Did you buy that with me? ’Cause I’m pretty sure something as nerdish as that never made it into the bags when I was looking—”

  “Hey!”

  “But at least it’s low cut,” she concluded, “which means wholesome but not unavailable.” She took a big bite of ice cream and pondered. “Not too slutty, but just attractive enough to get some attention?” Remy gasped and flung her spoon at me. “You skank! You’re going to a club and you didn’t invite me!”

  “I’m not going to a club,” I protested, my voice weak. It probably would have been more believable if not for the look of shame on my face.

  “Going to pick up men, without me. After all I’ve done for you,” Remy wailed dramatically, putting a hand to her forehead. Then she cocked her head and studied me. “If you were picking up a guy for the Itch, you’d be dressed differently. Why aren’t your eyes even the tiniest bit blue right now? You’re due.”

  I blanched and panicked, spitting out the first lie that came to mind. “I met someone earlier today. Had sex in a public bathroom.”

  Her eyes were the color of flint. “Oh yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  “What was his name, then?” Remy tilted her head, regarding me.

  “His name? Um, it was Bob.”

  She snorted. “You are a really bad liar, you know that?” Remy tossed the ice cream onto a nearby table and approached me like a lion that had just spotted prey. “Show me your forehead.”

  I backed away, sensing a trap. “Why?”

  Within the space of one breath, Remy had me pinned to a wall and was pushing my bangs up, revealing my glittering angel hickey. “Oh shit, Jackie. What have you done now?” She released me and stomped away through the foyer.

  That was not the reaction I was expecting. I certainly didn’t expect Remy to be pleased, but I didn’t expect her to walk away so I followed. “Where are you going?”

  I
turned the corner and saw Remy with a phone to her ear.

  “Who are you calling?” I put my hands on my hips and contemplated leaving for the club, but again, still no ride.

  Remy gave me a cross look and ignored me pacing in front of her. Someone must have picked up on the other end, because her expression changed to one of relief. “Noah? It’s Remy.”

  I groaned. “You had to bring Noah into this?”

  “I have a problem,” she said into the phone as if I weren’t there. “Yeah, I know the sun’s about to set. This won’t take long, I promise. Our friend has been naughty—there’s an angel mark on her forehead.” She held the phone away from her ear, and I heard a loud, explosive curse come through the receiver.

  Well, that certainly wasn’t good. My feelings about Noah were mixed, but I sure didn’t want him pissed off at me.

  “Yeah, I know,” Remy said, the phone cradled against her ear again. She pinched the bridge of her nose between two fingers, as if fighting off a headache. “It was my responsibility and she got away from me. I’m sorry. No, I know.” Pause. “I know.” Pause again. “Look, I got it already, okay?” Annoyance snapped through her voice, and she nodded a few more times in irritation, then handed the phone to me. “He wants to talk to you.”

  I took the phone, regarding it like I would a snake. I pressed my fingers over the mouthpiece and whispered to Remy, “What if I ‘oops!’ drop it and we get disconnected? Think he’ll call back?”

  She snorted at me and shook her head. “Trust me, you don’t want him any more pissed off at you than he already is.”

  I made a face at her and held the phone up to my ear, waiting for the explosion. It was silent on the other end, so I made my voice as cheerful as possible. “Hi, Noah,” I chirped.

  “You just find this all one big joke, don’t you?” I couldn’t tell how Noah was feeling from his voice. It was emotionless, like he was reading off a piece of paper.

  “I don’t understand what all the commotion is,” I began, keeping my voice light. “What’s the big deal if I made a new friend?”

  “They’re not your friends.” Noah sounded exhausted, and I could hear him stifle a yawn.