Wish You Were Here

by Phillipa Ashley

  ‘Cheers.’

  Moments later, Beth joined Marcus and kissed him on the cheek. ‘Was that Jack you were talking to?’ she asked.

  ‘Yeah. He seems all right I suppose. Got some funny ideas about women, but I suppose you won’t have to put up him for much longer.’

  She spotted Jack at the pub door, draping his jacket around Camilla’s shoulders. She squeezed Marcus’s hand and smiled. ‘Shall we go home now?’

  Chapter 14

  The train slowed on its approach to Kendal station as Beth headed back to the Lakes the following Friday night. Over to the west, she could just make out the jagged outline of mountains against an indigo sky. A very different skyline to the one she could see every day from the windows of her office. Without her even realizing it, she’d managed to become fond of both. Concrete and glass, swathed in a heat haze, were now as familiar to her as fells shrouded in mist.

  She knew Marcus wouldn’t have approved of such thoughts even if he might not say so out loud. Their weekend in London hadn’t been great, to say the least. She’d taken him shopping and on the London Eye. He’d admired the engineering and moaned about the queues, but she could hardly blame him for feeling out of place or expect him to do more than tolerate her city lifestyle.

  Now she need only jump on the local train to Windermere, get a bus to the village, and she’d be home, she thought with relief. Not even the thought of Camilla and Jack being so… intimate, could dampen her pleasure at seeing her family.

  ‘Tickets please.’

  The train manager was smiling down at her. ‘Can I see your ticket, love?’ asked the woman as she stamped the ticket of another passenger.

  Fumbling in her backpack, she found the ticket and held it out. ‘Sorry—I was on another planet.’

  ‘Hard week?’ said the manager.

  ‘Complicated.’

  ‘Nearly home now though. We’ll be in Kendal in five minutes.’

  The woman continued on her way up the carriage which was almost empty now apart from a businessman folding up his laptop and a girl with dreadlocks, already standing by the door with her mountain bike.

  Beth turned back to the window. It had been a pretty heavy week, quite apart from entertaining Marcus. She’d spent a lot of time researching the Corsican trip and had even run a quick web survey of existing customers to find out the type of activities they might enjoy. Freya had been on a course for most of the week, and Beth was wondering if she could cope with such a major project on top of her own workload. What if she let the company down? She set her jaw. No, she had to make the project work. She was determined to prove she could handle it. To herself and to Jack.

  The train manager’s voice crackled into the carriage, telling passengers they were now at Kendal, urging them not to leave their belongings behind, wishing them a safe onward journey. She felt like adding to the list of instructions as she got to her feet: ‘As for that girl in the middle carriage, cheer up and get a life. There are others worse off than you. And stop thinking about your boss.’

  After hauling her bag out of the luggage rack, she stood by the doors, trying not to lurch against the businessman. The doors hissed open and she was there. Another train platform, another wait. Half an hour to kill before her train to Windermere arrived.

  Staring out over the deserted platform, she felt the cool night air against her face. No heat rising from pavements here; the temperature was several degrees lower than in London.

  The street lights were on and the station kiosk had long since closed when Beth finally arrived. She was really tempted to call a taxi but couldn’t justify the expense, so she trekked out to the bus stop, hoping she wouldn’t have long to hang about. She was trying to decipher the timetable, which was tricky when it was obscured by a message that read, ‘Baz shags bus drivers.’

  ‘Beth!’

  In the bus stop, Honor, wearing a skirt that brushed the top of her thong sandals, was standing by Daisy.

  ‘Over here!’ she called.

  ‘Hi, Honor! What brings you here at this time of night? A secret mission for hot dog rolls?’

  Honor laughed from deep down in her chest, sending her dangly earrings wobbling. ‘No, a mercy mission to collect a weary homecomer.’

  ‘Did my dad ask you to come by any chance?’

  Kissing Beth on the cheek and grabbing her bag, Honor’s smile crinkled the corners of her eyes. ‘No. I volunteered for the assignment. I was having a bite to eat with him and Louisa when you called.’

  Beth wondered if Honor had been feeding the whole family while she’d been away. She seemed to have been spending a lot of time at the bike shop lately, according to Louisa. Beth had seen her briefly on her previous visit home and she’d picked up the phone more than once when she’d had called home. Once, she’d even answered her dad’s mobile.

  ‘It’s out of your way,’ she said, smiling.

  ‘Not really.’ Honor indicated a pile of boxes on the back seat. ‘I had to retrieve some glasses and crockery from a party. Killed two birds with one stone, if you know what I mean. Not that you’re a bird or need killing.’ She frowned at Beth’s half-hearted smile. ‘Get in, love.’

  She followed Honor and her skirt towards the car, wondering how she rustled up meals for hundreds of walkers and riders and tourists in that much material. The boot was full of paper plates and cups.

  ‘Do you mind slumming it with your bag on your lap?’

  ‘It’s absolutely fine. I’ve traveled in worse things than Daisy.’

  ‘How’s London?’ said Honor.

  ‘Gill’s flat is great. The job involves a lot of traveling, but I must admit, experiencing all those new places is ten times better than having to stay in the office.’

  Honor nodded. ‘Gill was always good to your mum. And I’m glad to hear it all sounds wonderful—are you sure you’ll want to come back at the end of your contract?’

  ‘I’m sure.’

  ‘Are the natives at Big Outdoors that scary?’ laughed Honor.

  ‘Not all of them,’ said Beth, laughing. ‘There’s Freya, my assistant who is an absolute scream. You will have to meet her. Tom and Shreeya aren’t scary either—they’re both product managers. Tom’s in a band called Bluesky who are pretty good actually and Dave Stirling, the IT manager is a total geek, but a real laugh… and then there’s Brad Pott.’

  Honor looked completely confused. ‘Brad Pott?’

  ‘Our cactus. Best not to ask.’

  Honor chuckled as the van pulled away from the curb. They were nearly home before Beth plucked up the courage to ask what had been occupying the other half of her mind on her way north.

  ‘Has Marcus has been round to the shop since he came down to London?’ she asked.

  ‘I haven’t seen him myself, but I believe he has.’

  ‘Do you know what he wanted?’

  ‘He didn’t stay long, apparently, once he knew you weren’t there.’

  ‘Oh.’

  Honor sounded amused. ‘Tell me to mind my own business, but you could do worse than Marcus, you know.’

  Beth clutched her bag as they rounded a sharp bend by the lake shore. The stone wall had a gap in it like a child missing its front teeth.

  ‘If he’s the man you want, I wouldn’t keep him waiting too long, not that it’s any of my business,’ added Honor as she accelerated out of the bend. ‘If he is the one…’

  ‘I do like Marcus…’ she said, feeling awkward but knowing Honor was only asking questions she knew she’d have to answer herself. Marcus hadn’t come straight out with the Big Question last weekend, but one day soon, she just knew he would. Her reply died in her throat; she had no answer for Honor or Marcus. Not yet.

  ‘It’s OK, I can see I should mind my own business,’ said Honor before tactfully moving on to the latest village gossip. They stopped halfway home, to collect the deposit for a function from a community hall. Alone in the car, Beth thought back to the flowers on the table, the sparkling windows, th
e well-stocked freezer full of meals in foil trays. Honor had become an important part of her family’s life while Beth was away. She and her mum had known each other since their schooldays and Beth couldn’t remember a time when the two of them hadn’t been together. She and Louisa had always looked on her as a surrogate auntie, although Honor would have thrown up her hands in horror at being referred to as auntie.

  ‘OK,’ said Honor, jumping back into the driving seat, waving a check. ‘Now I shan’t have to send the heavy mob round to the Women’s Institute.’ She revved the engine hard and they set off. A short time later, they’d reached Wheels on Fire and Honor was heading away up the street, an ominous plume of dark smoke trailing from Daisy’s exhaust.

  Right now, the stone and slated shop-cum-house, built before the bicycle had ever been invented, seemed as inviting as the grandest palace. As she walked up the path, the smell of fish and chips drifted through the open window, then the front door opened and her dad stood there, leaning on a stick and smiling. Well, she thought, as she kissed him on the cheek before hugging an excited Louisa, that was a double improvement.

  Marcus arrived on Saturday morning as she was standing in the bath, covered in hair removal cream, legs bowed like a Wild West gunslinger. His arrival was heralded first by the squeal of brakes outside the shop, and second by Louisa, calling knowingly up the stairs.

  ‘Be-eth!’

  She froze. Bugger. She only had her knickers on. ‘I’m up here, Lou!’

  ‘Someone to see you-uuu!’ called Louisa.

  ‘I’ll be down in a few minutes,’ she shouted through the bathroom door. After scraping off the cream and hastily rinsing her legs, the bathroom smelled like a chemical plant and there was gunk all over the enamel. Her dad would have a fit, but she didn’t want to keep Marcus waiting any longer. Dragging on shorts and an old T-shirt, she bounded downstairs two at a time and found him in the little living room, standing in front of the slate hearth with his arms folded.

  ‘Sorry—doing my legs’ she said, leaning over to kiss him. ‘I wouldn’t get too close, not if you don’t want to be knocked out by chemical fumes.’

  Marcus wrinkled his nose and backed off slightly.

  ‘Do you want a drink? A beer? Coffee?’

  ‘I’m driving and anyway, I can’t stay long. I’ve got to see a man about a Bentley. I just came over to ask what time you’ll be at the Grange tonight.’

  She felt her heart flip. ‘I’m not sure. You see, I really ought to spend some time with Dad and Louisa.’

  He frowned. ‘I had hoped we’d spend the night together.’

  ‘Well, I could come over for dinner and then I could come home. Or maybe we could go to the pub here in the village,’ she suggested.

  Marcus turned his car keys over in his fingers. ‘It wasn’t what I had in mind, but I suppose it’ll have to do. I’ll collect you at eight.’

  Beth smiled, but inside she felt a growing sense of unease. She could have gone over to the Grange; her father wouldn’t have minded really and Louisa was out with some friends from the Boat Club. So why hadn’t she said yes?

  Maybe she needed space, physical space to get things straight in her mind. To think and make sense of the changes in her life over the past few months.

  Marcus jangled his keys impatiently.

  ‘I’ll see you later then,’ she murmured, suddenly feeling weighed down by guilt and uncertainty.

  He just shrugged. ‘Eight then.’

  As she showed him out into the street, he hung about in the doorframe. ‘By the way,’ he said, pointing at her legs with his car key, ‘Haven’t you missed something?’

  He was clicking the key to the Porsche as she glanced down and saw a stripe of pink cream from her knee to her ankle.

  Chapter 15

  ‘Do you really need all this weird stuff?’ asked Louisa as Beth got her kit together later that day for the Corsica trip the following weekend. She was desperate to do something, anything, to take her mind off the previous evening she’d spent with Marcus.

  Beth nearly fell off the stool as Louisa offered to help. Lounging on a floor cushion, examining her nails, her sister looked like a Roman noblewoman waiting to be fed a grape. She stepped over a pair of long legs to reach a bag from the cupboard.

  ‘So are you actually taking all this crap?’

  ‘You know I am, Lou. And it’s not weird, it’s essential kit—as you’d know if you’d ever got out and explored the place you live in.’

  ‘I can’t wait to get away!’

  Beth smiled. ‘That much is clear.’

  ‘I do appreciate what you’re doing, you know. Even though I don’t say it very often, I’m not such an ungrateful cow.’

  Beth froze halfway to her mosquito net. Was this Louisa actually thanking her? A hand on her ankle made her turn round. Those big blue eyes looked back at her and she relented, as she always did.

  ‘I do know how hard you and dad work for me. I know you don’t really want to be in London or living in scummy old tents and stuff,’ she said.

  ‘Lou, I’m touched by your concern, but don’t worry. I don’t mind being in a tent and London isn’t that bad, actually.’

  ‘“Not that bad”? God, it must be better than this place. Nothing ever happens. I can’t wait to get out of here.’

  ‘Not long to wait now,’ said Beth.

  ‘And the bright lights of Liverpool will beckon. Doncha just love the city?’

  ‘Sometimes…’ said Beth thinking of her friends and the good times they’d had, of her trips abroad, what she’d achieved for the company. Inevitably, the image of him, arm around Camilla flew into her mind—and of Marcus’s angry face the night before. They’d been sitting in the car outside her house when he’d asked her to move in with him when she finally got back from London. She’d asked for more time to think about their relationship.

  ‘Time? Haven’t you had enough of that already?’ he’d said coldly.

  ‘I need a bit more,’ she’d told him before kissing him on the cheek and opening the door of the car. As she’d walked up the path, the realization had hit her like a sledgehammer that this was the first time they hadn’t made arrangements to see each other again. Later, inexplicably, she’d found the tears streaming down her cheeks as she’d got into bed and turned out the light.

  She pulled down a pair of flip-flops from the cupboard and managed a smile for at Louisa. ‘Sometimes I love London, and sometimes I’d do anything to get out of the place,’ she said.

  ‘Why? Is the boss a real prick?’

  ‘Lou!’ exclaimed Beth. She swore herself, so couldn’t really complain. It was the thought of Jack and that part of his anatomy together that had shocked her.

  ‘More like a prat,’ she said.

  ‘A real minger then?’

  Grabbing the net, she pulled it down from the cupboard, thinking of Jack. At nearly thirty-five, and with the odd grey hair, Louisa would have thought he was ready for his pension.

  ‘Come on then, what’s he like?’

  ‘He’s well over fifty with a face like a bulldog swallowing a wasp and that’s on a good day.’

  Louisa nodded sagely. ‘Thought so. All these executive types are mingers. Give me an actor or musician any day.’

  ‘I thought you were going to work at this performing arts school, not pull a fellow student.’

  ‘I am going to work,’ said Louisa propping herself up on her arms. ‘But if I meet someone fit and rich as well, I won’t complain.’ She eyed Beth thoughtfully. ‘You won’t forget your moisturizer and a bit of lippy, will you? You never know who you might meet on one of your trips. You don’t want to come across some gorgeous bloke when you’re looking…’

  ‘A total mess?’

  ‘Well, yeah.’

  ‘I’ll probably be looking really gross most of the time. It’s a working trip not a weekend on the Orient Express. And stop pulling a face. You’ll stick like it if the wind changes.’

  Louisa put
out her tongue. ‘You always say that and it never does. By the way, since when did you turn into Mum?’

  ‘The day you were born, Lou-lou.’

  Louisa sighed dramatically then got to her feet. As she stood up Beth couldn’t help admiring her. She was just like their mum: tall, slender, and pretty in an ethereal kind of way that didn’t quite go with living above a bike shop. Beth on the other hand, felt she reflected the location. Once, when she’d been a teenager and carrying a bit of puppy fat, Auntie Gill had helpfully said she was ‘built for comfort.’ She’d cried into her pillow for ages that night.

  ‘What are you taking to wear for clubbing?’ said Louisa suddenly.

  She shook her head. ‘There aren’t any clubs,’ she replied firmly. Which wasn’t true. There were a few in Porto Vecchio and some open air discos under the trees at one of the beach. She blushed, remembering slipping away with Jack into the dark forest one night, bass pounding in the distance, the faint rustle of other couples up to the same thing. Her stomach—and Jack’s bottom—had been covered in mosquito bites afterwards and they’d had a great time rubbing in the antihistamine cream.

  ‘No clubs?’ asked Louisa. ‘What about parties?’

  ‘There won’t be any of those either. I’ve got a night in a hotel, a business meeting with some local suppliers, then it’s off to the mountains.’

  Louisa pulled a face and pointed at Beth’s well-used walking shorts. ‘There’s now way you can go to a meeting or a posh hotel in those scuzzy things. What if Hugh Jackman walks in or Orlando Bloom?’

  ‘Or Elvis?’

  Louisa sighed dramatically and got up from the floor. ‘There is no hope for you. I’m going to march you into the village for some new shorts. There’s a brilliant sale on at Rush. They’ve got some really funky shorts… you should show off your assets, lots of girls would kill for a toned bum like you have.’

  Her eyes lingered on her reflection in surprise, seeing herself through new eyes for a moment. Even a few months of excess hadn’t totally wrecked what her outdoor lifestyle had achieved naturally, without the torture of the gym or diets. Recently, her face and limbs had acquired a golden tan that she had to admit, made her look healthy.