Tears of a Heart

by Chase Blackwood

  Maybe his father actually had cared for him all along and Kirin had been too young and too immature to see beyond the peddling challenges of youth.

  Chapter 8

  “At the heart of ceremony lies tradition, the backbone of any healthy civilization” A Common Sawol Saying

  Kirin woke up early that morning. The night prior he had oiled his sword, applied wax to the scabbard and leather grip, and packed his bag. He had followed his father’s advice, doing his best to keep it light while still packing warm clothing in case he was away through Vintas. He even spent some time figuring out how to most comfortably wear everything. At first it was a daunting task. How did he position his sword, bow, arrows and pack so that they wouldn’t interfere with each other?

  He had tried by placing his sword at his hip so that the arrows could sling across his back. The problem was the quiver would dig uncomfortable into his spine. The sword at his hip swung awkwardly. He’d trained with the spathe both at his hip and upon his back and over time grew to prefer a sword strapped tightly to his back. Although it had initially been quite awkward drawing a sword from his shoulder, he had practiced until he could draw and slice through a straw-man in the time it took to blink an eye. The first time Devon had seen him do it he simply stood there silently in awe, a rare treat from a boy who had an opinion on most everything.

  Kirin slung his curved blade across his back so that he could draw it with his right hand. He attached the quiver to the pack so that the arrows rested slightly lower than the grip of his sword. His bow fit perfectly across his back. He moved about, imaging various hero-like scenes. Most scenes involved Dannon watching from a safe distance as Kirin saved her.

  Once he’d worked up a small sweat he placed everything neatly in a corner. Beside his pack, bow, quiver and sword was his leather armor. The pieces were simple and functional, just enough armor to protect certain parts of his body while allowing for unhindered and rapid movement. With one final glance at his stuff he slipped out in search of food and his best friend.

  Kirin slipped through the household with the silence of a thrush mouse. He cut through the night as he avoided the large fires. The stars shone brightly, blanketing the heavens like a thousand phosphorous candles.

  He skirted a nearby building and nearly stumbled upon Dannon. She stood mostly in shadow, only a sliver of firelight outlined her features. Her young, lithe form and long auburn hair were as beautiful as a kalon flower in full bloom. His heartbeat quickened at the sight of her. She hadn’t noticed him yet. Her slender back was to him as she glanced about.

  He struggled to think of something clever or interesting to say. As the seconds scraped by he worried she’d turn around and catch him simply standing there staring at her like an oaf.

  “Dannon,” Kirin whispered as loud as he dared in case her father was nearby.

  Great, that should sweep her off her feet, he thought.

  She turned to look at him. Her gray eyes bordered on purple and were as lovely as a Sumor sunset. They lit up when she saw him and she skipped over to him. Her young body moved distractingly under a lace tunic tied tantalizingly at her narrow waist.

  Her smile slipped from her face as she looked at him.

  “What’re you doing here?” She asked.

  Had she caught him looking at her body? He couldn’t help himself. In so many ways he was disciplined. He could train for hours under the most miserable conditions, yet melted before the judgment of a teenage girl.

  “I came looking for you,” he lied.

  Her face blushed lightly as she gave him a gentle shove and a mock stern look. She was so beautiful when her brows knitted together.

  “You found me,” she replied. “You know my father doesn’t want me to see you.”

  “He made that abundantly clear,” Kirin said as he recalled their last interaction.

  Dannon laughed, her eyes sparkled in the moonlight.

  “Not so loud,” Kirin whispered.

  “So the future kovor is scared of getting caught with a girl at night, interesting,” she said teasingly.

  “I’m not scared,” Kirin replied a little too quickly.

  “No of course not, and the mouse doesn’t run from the cat.”

  Her smile caused his heart to thump oddly in his chest. She wasn’t the most beautiful girl in the village, but there was a beauty that she held that shone through her eyes that had so enamored the young Kirin. He longed to kiss her again and for some reason became so fixated on trying to make that happen that he failed to listen to her.

  “Am I boring you?” She asked more seriously, crossing her arms across her developing chest.

  “No, of course not.”

  “Then you’re simply daydreaming again. Perhaps I should leave you to it,” she said turning and looking away.

  This wasn’t going as he had planned. Somehow he had seen everything playing out differently in his head.

  “Wait, that’s not fair,” he said softly.

  Dannon regarded him for a moment, her eyes hardening into two fierce pools of defiance.

  “What is it future kovor? Do you command me to stay?”

  “I can’t command you,” he replied sheepishly.

  “That’s right you can’t.”

  Kirin now struggled to think of a way to change the tone of the conversation. How had it gone so wrong? He felt if Devon were here it would be different. Probably because he didn’t give two shits what women said. That tactic, however, didn’t seem appropriate at the moment.

  “Devon said he saw you,” Kirin said trying to change the subject, desperate to see her smile or laugh at least once more.

  “He did,” was all she said. She stood there for a moment staring at him. “Devon told me you thought of me while in the Shrine of Patience,” her brow momentarily knitting together again.

  “I did,” was all Kirin managed to say.

  There was a moment of awkward silence. Kirin ached to look upon her lips, but instead looked away as if he were afraid they would blind him like the sun. The courage he had demonstrated so blindly with his friends was nothing more than the hint of a shadow on a full moon. His only recourse was to fill the void with words.

  “I hoped I would see you again,” he said, the truth now spilling forward.

  “Why?” Dannon asked.

  “Isn’t it obvious?” Kirin replied this time courage filling his words as confidence inflated his lungs. “You fill my thoughts and dreams. You’re dangerous! I cannot spend a waking moment without thinking of how you smell, imagining your smile, and remembering our kiss.”

  Dannon dropped her arms and looked about ready to speak, but then stopped herself.

  Kirin felt naked before her. Why had he said all that? Devon was right, he was crazy.

  “I have to go, my father’s waiting for me,” she finally replied.

  “I leave tomorrow for my final trial,” he blurted out; hurt she hadn’t returned his affection.

  Dannon regarded him for a moment. She glanced to his mouth before she leaned forward. Kirin didn’t move as if he were afraid of startling a butterfly. Her warm lips graced his for a heartbeat, yet the feeling of her touch remained. It was gentle, leaving his lips tingling and his mind foggy.

  “So you don’t forget me,” she whispered before she turned and walked off.

  Kirin stood there for a moment dumbfounded and smiling stupidly. Dannon still liked him! He was so excited he almost forgot why he had ventured out in the first place.

  He watched her disappear around a corner before remembering he was making his way to the kitchen. Kirin walked past a stone building. His lips still inflamed with the purity of her touch.

  “Hey stupid,” Devon said startling Kirin from his revere.

  “What in the gods are you doing sitting in the dark?” Kirin asked as he tried to mask his surprise.

  “Why are you smiling like the village idiot?” Devon replied.

  “I saw Dannon,” he said.

  “Why a
m I not surprised! You’re damn reckless is what you are, on the night before you leave no less.”

  “I’m reckless?” Kirin said his mind felt sluggish and a further retort was still forming when Devon spoke.

  “Yes, you’re reckless! Great come back, by the way. Did she rob you of your wit too?”

  “No,” Kirin said.

  “No,” Devon said mockingly, “Anyway halfwit, I’ve been waiting for you.”

  “And I came looking for you,” Kirin lied again.

  What was it about lies that flowed so readily from the tongue, when truth felt so heavy and burdensome? Dannon was one of the few people he felt he could open up to, even if she sometimes made it frustratingly hard.

  “Whatever,” Devon continued, running a hand through his blonde hair, “So you find out what your next trial is yet?”

  “I did.” Kirin paused glancing around the corner, “Wait for me. I’m going to sneak in to get some food.”

  “Sneaking out at night, consorting with Borin’s daughter, and now stealing. You’re setting quite the example as the future kovor.”

  “How about you either shut it or help the future kovor steal some food so he doesn’t starve to death during his damned trial.”

  Devon tossed a heavy sack at him. Kirin grunted as he caught it. He peeked inside, dried meats, D’seart bread, and dried fruits were packed tightly within.

  “This’ll do,” Kirin said with a grunt of approval.

  “I knew there was no way you’d leave without getting something to eat,” Devon said with a smile.

  Kirin laughed, it was true. Part of his test was surviving alone with nothing but what he brought. Water would be easy to secure, but food he would have to find, trap, or hunt. It would be far easier to start off with a little something extra.

  “So, what’s the final test?” Devon asked as if he had been waiting to know for days.

  “I’m the kovor’s son, I think you know.”

  “No! You’re supposed to hunt a shroud cat?” He said incredulously.

  Kirin nodded, suddenly feeling a hint of pride stab at his insides. The two of them had been competitive since a young age. Despite Devon’s greater strength, Kirin had a height and skill advantage, allowing him to win most of their competitions.

  “My father let me choose from the armory as well,” he said.

  “What did you get?” Devon asked, struggling to hide his curiosity.

  “A bodark bow with something written on the upper limb and sitting groove. Also a Templas sword.”

  “A Templas sword? You don’t mean from the Templas Empire do you?”

  “Yup, sharpest damned blade I’ve ever held.”

  “Of course it is!” Devon paused for a moment before he whispered, “Can I see it?”

  “Tomorrow, I want to try and catch some sleep before the ceremony.”

  Kirin looked up at the night sky trying to discern the hour. He had a rough idea from the constellations’ positions in the heavens. There were constellations for each of the thirteen gods. By his estimate there were only a couple hours of darkness left.

  “You’re lucky,” Devon said starting to walk off.

  “Why’s that?”

  “I don’t start my trials until the end of Sumor,” Devon stopped half turning to Kirin.

  “End of Sumor,” Kirin repeated as if reliving a memory. “If they stick you in the Temple of Boredom I carved something into the wall, perhaps you can keep yourself entertained trying to figure out what it says.”

  “I can’t wait,” Devon replied sarcastically as he too looked to the sky.

  Dawn stretched slowly across the heavens like an awakening feline as slim fingers of light proclaimed the early morning hour. For Kirin it was the start of his final trial. In a few hours he would leave S’Vothe and venture into the wild.

  Once settled upon the fur covers of his straw filled mattress he fell into a fitful sleep, dreaming of Devon, Dannon, and his father. The first hints of fear crept in like a shadow tugging quietly at his intestines. It was a short sleep infused with subtle hints of lavender.

  The sun watched sanguinely as crowds gathered. Younger boys scrambled to get a better vantage point as older women complained of the weather. A cool wind blew in from the north whispering a sorrowful song of repose.

  Oblivious to it all was Kirin. He stood proudly at the center of a small dais. Behind him stood the Medicine Man and the Kovor. To his right were five senior warriors clad in ceremonial armor. To his left were five leather-clad women nearly as fierce looking as the men.

  “Kirin D’Velt of the kovor lineage step forward,” the kovor shouted.

  There was a shuffling in the crowd as people jostled for a better view. Those who had passed their own tests stood in silent remembrance. It was the youth who wore expressions of impatience and curiosity.

  Kirin saw Devon standing next to his father. A goofy grin was plastered upon his face as he watched the ceremony. The stern gaze of Borin was farther back as he stood next to his wife and their daughter Dannon. Her eyes were bright and attentive, but she didn’t catch his gaze.

  Kirin took a step forward. The Medicine Man then stepped forth to stand beside him. The kovor then continued.

  “The shroud cat has long been the standing symbol of our lineage, dating back to the First Kovor and the Time of the Reckoning.”

  Those who were familiar with their history remembered the stories of the great battle nearly two centuries ago. It was the time when the Caliphate of A’sh under Rajah had last attempted to wrest control of their lands. The time when the First Kovor and a group of warriors had captured three fierce shroud cats and released them at night upon the camp of the enemy. The wild cats had torn through the camp in a bloody rampage reminiscent of a Vintas gale. The story had grown to become legend among not only the Thane Sagan, but a warning taught to all D’seart royalty thereafter.

  Kirin’s father continued, as the crowd listened. It wasn’t every day the son of a kovor underwent their final trial.

  “The stripes we paint upon your face symbolize the patience, strength, and the mental toughness you have learned and displayed these last months.”

  The Medicine Man carefully painted white stripes onto his young face. Kirin could feel himself transforming into the powerful animal before his people.

  “Upon your return a new name will be granted to you as the rightful heir to the kovor lineage,” his father continued, “a name that you’ll ponder, learn, and make your own. Let it smolder in your heart and give you strength so that you can give strength to our people and one day lead with the conviction and power of the First Kovor.”

  Kirin’s father paused, letting the tension build in the crowd. The taking of a new name was done with great reverence. It was said that a proper name chose the person.

  “You shall become Aeden of the Thane Sagan. Now go forth and prove your worth.”

  With that, Kirin soon to become Aeden walked forth through the crowds past the squat structures of their village and into the untamed wilderness of the Gwhelt.

  Chapter 9

  “There is no other thrill than that of the hunt.” Saying of the Thane Sagan

  It was Kirin’s second month away from home. Sumor was in full effect. It was hot and humid. The day before it had rained intensely for nearly an hour, passing as quickly as it had come. He spent half the day drying his clothing. He found some tracks that were likely that of the shroud cat, but the rain only worked to wash them into oblivion.

  Hunger and fatigue defined his Sumor. It seemed to last an eternity as he tried to sign cut under the unrelenting sun. Evening showers drenched the lands, soaked his clothing and dampened his spirits. Buzzing mosquitoes and incessant flies kept him awake at night and pestered him during the day. The traps he would set were half as often tripped by the rain as they were empty. In fact, at times it felt as though nature were testing his very resolve. The lessons he had learned about patience were the only thing driving him forward. Most day
s were simply spent looking for water or trying to catch food. He spent more time identifying edible herbs and plants than he did trying to find the elusive shroud cat.

  And so his days passed. When Hearvest finally came with its gradual cooling and shorter days he hardly noticed. It wasn’t until the chilly winds forced him to dig for warmer clothing and the leaves began to turn that he truly realized how long he had been away. Despite all that time he felt no closer to finding a shroud cat.

  When he first set out he had grandiose ideas about setting traps with larger game to lure the shroud cat in. He imagined capturing it alive and riding it into the village. He knew the last part was pure fantasy, but part of him wanted to make his father proud and to prove he could pass his trial faster than those before him. He’d prove that he had the blood of a god coursing through his veins.

  There were days where he spent half the time daydreaming. Kirin sat theatrically upon the back of the fearsome beast, somehow having learned to tame it. Devon gasped in shock as he sauntered by. His father smiled proudly. Borin looked on with respect and fear as Dannon swooned. He’d slip off the back of the terrible beast and sweep Dannon up into his arms and ask her to marry him. With each passing day that fantasy faded further into obscurity and then into absurdity.

  It was therefore a shock that on his fifth month from home he acquired clear sign of the animal. Distinct tracks and fresh scat indicated he wasn’t far. The day passed quickly as he followed the animal’s sign. It left distinct prints in the dirt. A tuft of hair was caught on a branch. A few steps away a broken twig indicated a large animal’s passing. The final indicator was scratch marks on a tree. He was close. His excitement grew and it ironically became harder for him to concentrate as he daydreamed of catching the beast.

  Of course as fate would have it he wasn’t yet meant to catch the creature. Days of tracking lead him nowhere closer. He knew that they could travel over twenty miles in a day and claimed massive tracts of land as their own. In order to secure their claim they sprayed an incredibly musky odor onto large trees often shredded by their vicious claws. It was then that he stumbled upon an idea he couldn’t believe he hadn’t thought of before.