Just Breathe Series (Trilogy Box Set)

by Martha Sweeney

  I nod.

  “Hey,” Joe calls, coaxing me to look at him.

  My gaze hesitantly lifts to find his face. “Okay,” I mumble.

  An hour later, Nathan shows up after calling Joe back as soon as his meetings were over and is already on his way. The anger and sadness in Nathan’s face hits me pretty hard, making me want to seek out the attackers again. Joe has to keep a strong hold on me to make sure I don’t go wandering, looking for trouble until we eventually leave to stay at Nathan’s.

  One Hundred Fifty Two

  Jared is released the next morning since his wounds are minimal other than a few cuts and bruises. The doctor just wanted to monitor him to make sure he didn’t have a concussion. Most of our family stayed in the area, waiting until it was time for Jared to be released. Joe insisted on not going back to the hospital and instead help Pop-Pop and Joanna at the condo to prepare for Jared’s return. Pop-Pop and Joanna are in the kitchen half the time, only letting me help a little, making food and setting it out on the large dining room table once everyone starts to show up. Jared’s in good spirits overall, not showing any signs of distress or trauma by how he acts. I study him speculatively, not completely convinced.

  By the evening time, some of our film crew arrive and Jared preps to go live on video. I try talking him out of it, even Maggie agrees with me that it’s too soon, but he won’t listen. He dresses nicely, as he always does, but he won’t allow the team to put on any makeup to cover his bruising. It suddenly dawns on me what Jared’s really planning.

  My friends, family and I sit patiently and nervously, watching from the sidelines as Jared receives the signal that he’s live.

  “Good evening,” Jared greets his distant audience. “For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Jared Welsh and I’m one of the main people with Naturally Me, an online wellness blog my best friend Emma started a few years ago.” He pauses for a brief second. “You might be wondering what tonight’s impromptu broadcast is about, especially since it’s last minute and many of you have just found out from our posts on social media.”

  Jasper whimpers softly, catching my attention enough to realize that he wants to be let down. He sniffs the area for a few moments and then gradually heads toward Jared.

  “Hey, Jasper,” Jared greets happily, picking him up. “The reason why I’m here with you is because this is a message that can not wait. Last night, while I was hanging out with some friends . . . friends I haven’t seen in a while . . . I was attacked.”

  Ian shows me the computer screen and my eyes widen as the number of viewers for this broadcast is well over six million.

  “Let that sink in for a minute folks,” Jared says after several long seconds. “That’s right. You heard me correctly. I was attacked. Jumped. Ganged up on.”

  Joe’s hand squeezes mine in reassurance. My gaze goes to him briefly, returning to Jared as soon as he starts talking again.

  “It happened when I went into the men’s room and is why I have these marks on me.” Jared turns his head slightly from side to side and rolls up the unbuttoned cuffs of his shirt. “There were four perpetrators who tried to hurt me . . . well, I guess you could say they did, to some extent physically, but that’s it.”

  Maggie squeezes my other hand, indicating she needs some support herself.

  “Mentally and spiritually I am fine. I’m walking away from this experience in a way I didn’t expect. And . . . I forgive each of those men who did attempt to do me harm. I hold no ill will towards you . . . you are human just like me. We make mistakes. We act out in ignorance. And, we act out in fear . . . which is why you attacked me.” Jared takes a deep breath. “In light of this situation, I wanted to speak out to everyone who has been attacked for being different . . . regardless if it’s based on gender, religion, sexual orientation or any other beliefs or ways of living. Because of this, I choose to only reply back with love, kindness and compassion. I do not proclaim a war on hatred. I call for more love . . . peace. May you find your way and allow others to do the same, regardless if you agree with them, their actions or their choices. With that being said, I hope to have influenced and encouraged someone . . . perhaps you, to lead with love. To forgive, which doesn’t mean to forget, only to live through your heart. Remember to treat others the way in which you would want to be treated. If you do that, I bet you just might make more friends.” Jared takes a moment to collect himself again. “Because of these events, regardless of the fact that I am a celebrity, no one should have to endure such hatred . . . even the men who did this to me.”

  Jasper wiggles in Jared’s arms and ends up licking Jared’s chin.

  I feel Joe Jr. kick and I do my best to settle my emotions.

  “I don’t have it all planned out just yet, but Nathan and I are working on a project to help others who have gone through a similar experience. Our goal is to provide a safe, loving environment . . . the details will take some time, but everyone will know what we’ve got planned once we start to take action. In the meantime, Nathan’s and my wedding will still take place. We will continue to live our lives with love and hope to lead as a positive example. Thank you to everyone who has sent loving support. It means a lot. But, I ask you do the same to the people around you . . . the ones who may be dealing with something similar or worse, but aren’t aware of it. Treat each other with kindness, love and compassion. You just might need it in return one day.” Jared takes in a deep breath and lets out the heaviness weighing inside him. “Thank you and goodnight.”

  Everyone’s phones are buzzing the minute the team signals that they are done recording. Joe’s family calls both of us, Jared’s getting calls from friends who aren’t with us and the list goes on with other supportive friends and family.

  Once the energy in the place cools, Jared and I chat off to the side. “I’m really proud of you,” I comment, acknowledging his strength. “Who knew you could be so wise?!”

  “Ha ha, you’re funny,” Jared jabs back.

  “Seriously, though, I’m really proud of you,” I state.

  “I know, Kitten,” Jared replies. “I really appreciate everyone’s support. I meant every word that I said.”

  “I believe you,” I say. “What made you respond this way? Not that I’m judging or disagreeing or anything, I’m just in shock, is all. At first, I didn’t think you were telling me the truth about being okay with what happened, but after seeing you and hearing your speech, I know that you meant every word of it.”

  “Seeing what Dr. Callahan has been able to help you with, I got a copy of his book on my iPad right away and started using it awhile back,” Jared explains. “So, as soon as we left the restaurant and went to the hospital, I had Greg come here to get my iPad since it wasn’t with me.”

  “Really?!” I say, more pleased with what he says than questioning it.

  “Really,” Jared confirms. “Some of the techniques were a little tricky because of the bruises, but I’ve managed. I still use it from time to time when something pops up, but overall I’m good.”

  “Good,” I comment, relaxing more.

  “Besides, Nathan, you, Maggie and our family . . . soon to be family,” he shares, touching my belly. “I want to be a good example for them, you know?!”

  “Yeah,” I confirm, sniffing back tears.

  “Yeah,” Jared agrees. “I knew that I needed to fix this myself and needed to be strong for Nathan and for everyone else.”

  I smile and nod as tears roll down my cheeks.

  “Don’t cry, Kitten. Don’t be upset,” Jared coaxes.

  “I’m not,” I return. “It’s just hormones.”

  “You sure?” Jared checks.

  “Yeah,” I say meekly.

  “You okay, beautiful?” Joe inspects, handing Jared and I each a drink.

  “Yeah,” Jared verifies. “Just hormones according to her.”

  “You did great, man,” Joe praises, hugging him.

  “Thanks,” Jared accepts.

 
“Everyone’s really proud of you,” Joe informs.

  “I know,” Jared says, smiling confidently.

  “Over fifteen million views now,” Ian reveals. “It’s only been an hour and they’ve doubled.”

  “I wouldn’t be surprised if we get some calls for interviews,” Nathan comments.

  “There’s only one person I would interview with,” Jared says with a smirk.

  “Who?” inquires Joanna.

  “Ellen DeGeneres,” Jared reveals.

  One Hundred Fifty Three

  Joe and I stay late into the night with Jared and Nathan along with our family. Kim, Brenda and Gwen were with us and constantly monitoring me to make sure the stress of the moment didn’t jeopardize my health. Thankfully, Joe was helping, reminding and assisting me with some of the tapping that worked rather quickly, even when some of my emotions were intense. Joe used a few tapping sequences himself and my love for him grew more than I could have imagined — knowing that he was as concerned for Jared as I was, just better at hiding it.

  Wanting to ease my nerves, Joe takes Sadie, Jasper and me out for a relaxing getaway the next day. He rents a large house down in Coronado for a long weekend and we’re currently getting onto a smaller than usual sailboat for the afternoon. Aside from the past few days being emotional, Joe wanted to treat me to a little mini vacation since it’s only about a month away from Joe Jr. being due to arrive.

  It’s the middle of September and the weather is perfect. Joe insists on bringing several different layers of clothing even though it’s been warm. He eases me down onto the bow of the boat area as he readies the vessel. I’m proud to say that I’ve remembered a bit of the sailing jargon.

  As the ship journeys out to sea, I get up and join Joe at the helm, wanting to help steer while Sadie and Jasper play on the couch. Joes snuggles into me, letting me guide us out to open water before making his way to raise the sails. We don’t go out too far, but just far enough to be away from the hustle and bustle of the coastline. There’s only one other boat floating about a mile away and that’s the ship that has Anna and our bodyguards.

  After we drop anchor, contentedness and peace settle within me as Joe, Sadie, Jasper and I lounge on the cushioned chair with our son sleeping in my belly. We don’t say much, but there have been many times where we don’t need to, only enjoying the comfort of being together. We play with the dogs and work on teaching Jasper a new trick. He’s been picking up on them rather quickly, especially when Sadie models the behavior too and then gets a treat. Jasper’s quick to learn and was potty trained in just two days with the help of Sadie and the easy access to a yard with the house. Having an already trained dog is making things a lot easier — Sadie’s taken on a mommy-like roll with him.

  As we watch the sun start to set, Joe brings out some food for us and we toast to the day.

  “Are we staying overnight on the boat?” I ask.

  “If you want to, we could. There’s a full bedroom and bathroom below,” Joe states.

  Shrugging my shoulders, I say, “I’m good with whatever you want to do.”

  “Then, why don’t we play it by ear?” Joe suggests.

  “Sure,” I agree.

  The stars glisten across the water as the boat gently rocks to the music of the sea. There’s not a single sound other than the moaning of our ship and the gentle patter of waves.

  “How’s our son?” Joe inquires, settling back down behind me after cleaning up from our dinner.

  “Good,” I offer. “I think I ate him right to sleep.”

  “Good,” Joe replies, sweeping his warm hands over my belly. “I was thinking it would be kind of nice to stay the night on the boat.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah,” Joe returns. “We’ve been on a boat, but we’ve never officially stayed the night. It would be another first for us.”

  “That sounds like a good idea,” I support.

  “Good,” Joe agrees.

  “Have you ever slept on a boat before?” I check.

  With a soft chuckle, Joe says, “Yes. But, not with a woman in my bed.”

  “Sounds like a double first, then,” I muse.

  “Definitely one that will forever be a grand memory,” Joe replies.

  “It’ll be tricky, but I think we can manage it,” I state.

  “What’s that, beautiful?” Joe inspects.

  “Having sex on a rocking boat while I’m this pregnant,” I tease.

  “We’ve got options to work around it,” Joe chuckles.

  “We do?” I return, lifting a brow.

  “Yes,” Joe confirms.

  Sometime later, I find myself being woken up by Joe. “Hmm,” I hum, trying to brush away the fuzziness in my head.

  “Why don’t we go to bed, beautiful,” Joe suggests.

  “Why?”

  “Because you’re falling asleep,” Joe chuckles.

  “No, I’m not,” I protest weakly.

  “Come on,” he coaxes, standing and offering to help me up.

  “Fine,” I mock complain.

  Joe leads me down the stairs by one hand while Sadie and Jasper are right behind. I head into the bathroom area that is just before the bedroom to wash up and get ready, feeling the exhaustion starting to kick in. As I move into the bedroom, I stop dead in my tracks. The room is dark other than a bunch of fake candles flickering.

  “What are you doing?” I ask when I see Joe kneeling on the floor next to the dogs.

  Joe doesn’t say anything, only reaching his right hand forward for me to take it. When I’m standing just in front of him, Joe speaks up. “I’ve been wanting to do this for a while . . .” Joe’s voice falters.

  “Do what?” I inspect.

  “Emma,” Joe begins. “I’ve struggled with this . . . not sure if it would be best before Joe Jr. arrives, or after.”

  “What do you mean?” I ask as he takes a deep breath.

  “Just let me talk, please,” Joe begs. “I need to say what I have to say.”

  I smile and nod, realizing that something is weighing heavy on his mind.

  “You’ve had my heart since that first day we met . . . and I’ve been waiting and hoping for you to feel the same. I know you have for awhile now . . . and now . . . now with what happened with Jared, it can’t wait any longer.”

  My heart leaps in my chest. “Joe . . .”

  “Don’t talk,” Joe directs, interrupting me. “I need to say this and I need you to just listen to me.”

  I remain silent despite the fact that he continues talking again, not giving me a second to agree.

  “I know we’ve had some challenges together . . . some with you not willing to talk about your feelings and emotions, but I know . . . I’ve seen it . . . how you feel. I know you love me . . . and I knew it before you even told me that day at your parents house.” Joe pauses temporarily like he’s gathering his thoughts. “I see it every day with the way you look at me. In the little things you do for me . . . for Joe Jr. as we get ready for his arrival. Emma . . . my love . . . my beautiful. You have added such great happiness to my life that I could never have imagined or believed was possible. You . . . Joe Jr. . . . and the family and friends we have . . . and the family and friends we will have in the future . . . having you in my life has given me so much. More than you can imagine.”

  I swallow hard as the comprehension of the moment crystalizes. Tears threaten, stinging my eyes, as I notice Joe’s eyes spilling over.

  “Emma . . . beautiful,” Joe continues. “You are the one who I want to spend the rest of my life with . . . build our family and expanding our happiness with everything we do together. Knowing how you are, I need you to just listen. Listen to what I have to say and you’ll understand why I can not wait any longer to ask you to marry me.” Joe takes a deep breath.

  “Yes,” I answer on a breath out.

  “Aside from the fact that we love each other . . . are already living together and have Joe Jr. joining us in just about a month.�
�� Joe’s voice cracks as he fights to stay composed. “Aside from the fact that it just makes sense that we get married . . . there’s no reason not to. It’s not a matter that I or you need to get married to prove anything to ourselves or to anyone else . . . but only to celebrate what we have and what will be, together as we continue to grow as one.”

  “Yes,” I repeat a little more confidently so he’ll hear me.

  “I need you to marry me . . . for you, for me, for Joe Jr. and what we mean as a family. I know it’s just a piece of paper and just one day of many in our lives together, but I need you, Joe Jr. and those closest to us to know how important you are to me . . . .”

  “Joseph,” I interrupt.

  “Emma, please. Let me finish. I really need to . . . .”

  “Yes, I’ll marry you,” I state more clearly.

  “It doesn’t need to be a big wedding . . .,” Joe continues, “something small with just our immediate friends and family will do . . . wait. What?!”

  “Yes,” I repeat.

  Joe doesn’t say anything for what feels like a minute. “Yes?”

  “Yes,” I say again.

  Joe studies me for a second. “I had this whole thing . . . a whole speech. I even had pros and cons for a prenup and other things.”

  “It isn’t necessary, but you can keep going if you want to,” I giggle as Joe stands and kisses me.

  “You sure?” Joe checks.

  “Joseph Michael Covelli,” I call sternly.

  “Wow,” Joe chuckles. “You’ve never called me by my full name. Does that mean I’m in a lot of trouble?”

  “No,” I laugh. “But, you better believe me.”

  Joe presses his lips to mine again. “I do. I do. I do believe you.”

  “Besides,” I say with his lips still stuck to mine. “Even if I was joking . . . or lying . . . there’s nowhere for me to go. We’re surrounded by water, remember?!”

  “Yeah,” he confirms, kissing me again.

  “You planned that, didn’t you?” I jokingly accuse.

  “Maybe just a little,” he chuckles.