Imposter in Zebra-striped Briefs

by C. C. Dado

  Nathan felt a sense of pride wash over him. He could not believe he was dating someone who could make all of this beautifully intricate furniture. At least he thought they were dating. Maybe he should ask David. Nathan wasn’t sure if you asked people things like that.

  Inside Nathan saw a few people browsing through the display room. He hadn’t seen David yet. As he wondered farther back, he smiled, hearing David talking with someone; that is until he heard what David was saying.

  “I told you I’m not dating anyone. Now get off it.”

  His stomach dropped at David’s words. He guessed he didn’t have to ask now. Nathan stood frozen to the spot, wishing he could disappear, not wanting to hear anymore.

  “Oh, come on, something’s going on. You usually don’t do anything but work and go home, yet you’ve been out twice this week, and now you’re canceling on the Sounders game tomorrow because you have ‘plans.’ Come on, spill. Who is she?”

  “I told you it was no one special. Now go away.”

  “No way, dude. Something is up. Is your mystery girl not giving it up? Is that why you’re acting all freaking grumpy and weird? My friend Ashley who you hooked up with at my graduation party is back in town, and stopped by last night hoping to see you. She left her number. She’s absolutely a sure thing.”

  “Yeah, fine, I’ll give her a call,” David said, sounding like he was done having the conversation.

  Nathan felt like he was going to be sick. He tried to quietly make his way out of the store, but he tripped over a push broom that was leaning up against the shop wall and fell, knocking it down, managing to attract everyone’s attention.

  David and the guy he was talking to turned in Nathan’s direction. Time passed slowly as Nathan stood up.

  “Um, can I help you?” David said, looking as nauseous as Nathan felt but trying to act like he had never seen Nathan before in his life.

  Nathan felt the humiliation wash over him as he realized he was nothing to David but an embarrassment. That was nothing new in his life. He just hadn’t expected it. He had hoped maybe this was real.

  Nathan cleared his throat before responding. “Sorry, um, I’m in the wrong store,” he said before turning and leaving as fast as he could out of the building.

  Luckily by the time he got to the bus stop, a bus was pulling up. He didn’t even care where it was going. He hopped on, went to the back, and sat down. After a few minutes, he took his phone out and texted Josh.

  I went by David’s work today to surprise him.

  Ding…. Oh buddy, tell me you didn’t, Josh responded.

  How do you know it didn’t go well?

  Ding.… Not my first straight boy rodeo. Sorry, Nathan.

  I thought he really did like me. Maybe I’m just not likeable.

  Ding…. Stop it. I think he does like you, but he’s got his own shit he’s going to have to deal with before he figures that out. Where are you?

  On a bus to somewhere. Not sure. I got on the first one I saw.

  Ding…. Understandable, but not the best long-term plan. Get back here. Come over when you’re home. We can watch movies and drink lots of beer.

  I think I need to be alone, but thank you. He could barely get the text out before his eyes started to water.

  By the time Nathan got home, it was dark out. He let himself into the building, hoping he wouldn’t see Josh since his eyes were red and swollen. He heard something up ahead as he walked toward his apartment door. He looked up at who he could only assume were “the gamers” coming down the hallway toward him in full costume. It really was like seeing a mythical creature. The girl was exquisite, her fiery-red hair shaved on one side like a fierce goddess, and at least a foot taller than the minion next to her. The costumes were like something out of a movie. Nathan was almost afraid to make eye contact as they went by him, but she acknowledged his presence with a lift of her chin and a husky-voiced “’Sup” as they passed.

  That’s how Josh found him, standing stunned in the hallway, looking at the front entrance.

  “Whatcha doing?” Josh asked slowly from his apartment door.

  “I think I just saw a unicorn.”

  “Do you need to come in?” Josh asked, sounding concerned, probably thinking Nathan was so distraught he was hallucinating.

  “No, I’m good. Just want to go to bed.” Nathan went into his apartment, closing the door without saying anything further.

  Nathan heard his phone as he crawled into bed.

  I’m sorry was all the text from David’s number said.

  Nathan wiped the moisture from his eyes with the back of his hand angrily before burying his head into the pillow, wishing he had never met David.

  Chapter 15

  Trip to the store

  “YOU’RE COMING with me,” Nathan heard Josh say beside his blanket cocoon.

  “What? How did you get in here?” Nathan pulled his covers off his head sleepily, not sure exactly what time he finally fell asleep last night.

  “I have a key, dude. You’re subletting, remember?”

  “FYI, that’s illegal unless it’s a medical emergency.”

  “Technically this is an emergency. I had to make sure you were okay. Also Brandon ran out of cream for something he’s cooking for the wedding feast, and I don’t want to go alone. So you and I are going to go run to the store to get it.”

  “I’m not going anywhere.”

  “Oh, but you are. I refuse to let you pout today. It’s my wedding day. Get up.”

  They drove to the store in Brandon’s car. Nathan leaned up against the door, hunched into his coat, ignoring Josh.

  “So tell me what happened,” Josh asked, looking over at Nathan as he made a turn onto Pine Street.

  “He said I was nobody. Acted like he had never seen me before. I also heard him agree to a date with some girl that was ‘a sure thing.’” Nathan hated that his voice sounded like he was going to start crying again.

  “Fucking closet guys,” Josh said, shaking his head in disgust. “One thing you need to learn about closet guys is they are afraid of what other people think of them, so they hide it, hence ‘the closet.’ They’re too embarrassed to admit how they feel.”

  “You mean maybe he was trying to hide how he feels about me? I’m not sure if that is much better.”

  “I know, dude. I know,” Josh said, pushing on the gas pedal as the light turned green. The sympathetic look in Josh’s eyes turned to shock as he suddenly slammed on the brakes. Nathan’s entire body froze when he heard the sound of tires screeching. The impact felt like life in slow motion, then suddenly in fast forward before everything went black.

  Chapter 16

  Josh hated hospitals (Josh)

  THE SOUNDS of the machines beeping as they monitored patients and the overwhelming smell of antiseptic assaulted Josh as he made his way through the lobby to use the phone. It was like an aura of fear and pain permeated the air. Josh reached into his pocket for his phone. They had taken Nathan here after the accident because the passenger door was smashed in and caught his right leg. They wanted to scan it and make sure it wasn’t broken, and make sure he didn’t have a concussion from the force of the airbag that knocked him out. What a fucking thing to happen on his wedding day. Luckily everyone was okay for the most part. Somehow he had walked away without a scratch. He had already called Brandon and spent ten minutes assuring him he was okay.

  Josh wasn’t sure what he was about to do was a good idea, but he dialed the phone anyway.

  “Hello?” David said,

  Josh could hear the sound of the wood lathe in the background.

  “Hey, this is Nathan’s friend Josh.”

  “Look, I know I was a dick. I have been trying to get hold of Nathan to apologize, but he won’t answer my calls. I was thinking about just stopping by but I know it’s your wedding day, and I didn’t want to cause problems.”

  “I’m glad you realize you’re an asshole. But that’s not why I’m calling. Not that I th
ink you deserve to know anything about Nathan right now, but I actually think he cares about you. We were in an accident this morning. Nathan’s in the hospital.”

  “What? What hospital?” David sounded frantic. Josh could hear him rifling through things, until he heard the rattling of keys. The last thing this day needed was another accident.

  “Hey, calm down. He’s going to be fine. Probably has a broken leg and maybe a concussion. They are doing some scans now, but I thought you might like to know. We’re at Swedish Hospital.”

  “I’m on my way.”

  “Yeah, I thought you might be,” Josh said, disconnecting the call.

  Chapter 17

  Meeting Nathan’s Mom (David)

  DAVID FOUND Josh in the emergency room waiting area. “Have you seen him? Have you heard anything?” David asked.

  “Brandon and Dotty are in with him now. They were helping him get all his insurance and paperwork stuff sorted out. He has a mild concussion and a broken leg, but other than that, he’s fine.”

  “Thank God.” David sat down and lowered his head, completely exhausted by his emotions since he got Josh’s call.

  “You know, if you are going to be here when he comes out, you need to be sure you want this. Don’t mess around with him,” Josh said.

  David felt himself getting irritated over how protective Josh sounded about Nathan. Nathan was David’s, but he admitted to himself he didn’t have the right to say that after what happened and tilted his head in acknowledgment of Josh’s words.

  David sat not so patiently in the waiting room for the next hour, listening to some guy in the corner ramble on about his crossword puzzle, driving him nuts. Everyone dealt with emergencies differently, David guessed. He couldn’t believe this was happening. Even though they told him Nathan was fine he still wouldn’t be okay until he saw him. He kept seeing the look on Nathan’s face at the shop, so freaking hurt. How could he have treated him like that? What a fucking jackass, he finally finds the one thing he has been looking for and he’s too scared to take it.

  “What’s a seven letter word for hot porridge?”

  He was just about to snap and tell him to please shut the fuck up when he heard Nathan’s name at the reception desk.

  “I got a call that my son, Nathaniel Harris, was brought here.” David turned and saw a well-dressed woman in slacks, heels, and pearls at the reception desk. Noting to himself that Nathan was in fact short for Nathaniel.

  He got up and went to Nathan’s mom.

  “Um, hi, ma’am. I couldn’t help but overhear you’re here for Nathan,” David said, feeling about ten years old with the way this lady was looking at him.

  “Nathaniel. Yes. Do you know my son?”

  “Yes, my name’s David. Nathan and I are… dating,” he said, knowing this was the perfect first step to being the type of guy Nathan deserved.

  By the look of complete horror on her face, it was abundantly clear she did not know her son was gay, and David had just thrown Nathan out of the closet.

  “What? What are you talking about? My son is not gay!” she practically screamed, completely horrified by the thought.

  “I’m so sorry. I thought that you knew,” David said, not knowing what to say to make this better.

  “My son is not gay,” she adamantly repeated.

  “I’m pretty sure he is since he’s dating a guy. That’s kind of the definition of gay,” Josh was kind enough to chime in.

  “My son is obviously confused. Do you just prey on young men with mental disabilities?” she said, looking disgustedly at David.

  “What are you talking about?” David rubbed the back of his neck, confused and outraged at the audacity of this woman. “Listen, I’m sorry, but I have no idea what you are talking about,” David said again.

  “My son is severely autistic,” Nathan’s mom declared, loud enough for the entire hospital to hear.

  David’s head was spinning. How in the hell could he not know if Nathan had autism? Wouldn’t there be signs? Sure he was quirky. Maybe he had one of those high-functioning conditions. David had seen a special on that one time. Oh God, had David taken advantage of Nathan and not even realized it?

  “I don’t know what to say…. I didn’t know. How could I not have known he’s autistic?” David asked himself, running his hand through his hair.

  “Oh, for the love of all that is holy, Mother! For the last time, I do not have autism,” Nathan hollered, hobbling out of the exam room on a pair of crutches, wearing a hospital gown.

  He moved in between his mother and David, turning to look at David before he spoke.

  “You really believed I was autistic. Really?” he asked. David looked ashamed and lowered his eyes apologetically before Nathan turned back to his mom. “And I heard you pretending you didn’t know I was gay too. I’ve been telling you that since I was fourteen. You just choose not to hear it.” Brandon came through the door behind Nathan, carrying his clothes.

  Nathan paused as Brandon’s mom came over and took hold of Brandon’s hand. Suddenly Nathan raised his shoulders like he was prepared to do battle, and looked at his mom.

  “Listen, Mom, if you want to be a part of my life, you can be, but things are going to change. If you are not proud enough to hold the title of ‘Mom’ and accept me for who I am, then you need to walk away.”

  She looked at the group of people who had gathered behind him like an army, adjusted her purse, turned around, and left the hospital without looking back. Nathan deflated as David placed his hand on Nathan’s shoulder, knowing his heart was broken, wanting so bad to be the one to fix it. For as much pain as Nathan’s mom had caused him in his life, she was still his mom. David couldn’t even imagine what that would feel like to have the person who was supposed to love you unconditionally turn their back on you.

  “Hey,” David said, massaging Nathan’s shoulder, trying to break him out of his saddened trance. “I’m sorry,” David continued when Nathan wasn’t making any move to acknowledge him.

  Nathan suddenly faced David, almost knocking him off balance. “The same goes for you. If you are ashamed of me in public, don’t come around to be with me in private. I deserve more than that.”

  David had no idea where this fiercely confident attitude was coming from, but he was ashamed of himself and proud of Nathan at the same time. David saw Josh smile out of the corner of his eye and knew he was proud of him too.

  “I’m not ashamed of you, Nathan. I never was. I was just trying to figure this out. When I saw you the other day, I instantly regretted not telling my brother, for not being man enough to admit to my brother what I wanted. I had no intention of calling that girl. I was just trying to get him to stop asking me to answer questions I didn’t have the guts to answer. I have been acting like such an ass, I’m so sorry. I have never been embarrassed by you. Meeting you and feeling what I felt was a complete shock to me, but this isn’t just about my feelings for you. It was me trying to come to terms with who I really am and accepting that. I’m sorry I dragged you down in the process. I cannot tell you how I felt when Josh called and told me you were in the hospital. I thought I may never see you again. I promise you I will be what you deserve if you give me another chance.” David pleaded with Nathan with his eyes. “I called my folks and asked them to come up for a visit, that I had something really important to tell them. I want to tell them about you, about us. I want you to be with me when I do, I want them to see why I have fallen so hard, so fast.” David closed the distance between him and Nathan. “Please give me another chance?”

  Nathan glanced around at his friends, looking indecisive. Nathan looked at Josh for help, who gave him a wink and tilted his head toward David. David owed him big time.

  Nathan leaned in and kissed David in front of everyone. He wrapped his arms around him, promising never to let Nathan go.

  “Is this a bad time to remind you you’re going commando in a tie-back hospital gown?” Josh said. “Props on that, by the way. Made the
‘I am male, hear me roar’ speech extra awesome. Pretty sure you’re my new gay superhero.”

  Nathan’s face had turned bright red. David squeezed his waist and tugged the gown closed in back. “I’m taking you home,” he half-growled, half-whispered in Nathan’s ear.

  “Hey, don’t forget we have a wedding to go to,” Josh said, draping his arm around Brandon.

  Chapter 18

  The Wedding (Nathan)

  NATHAN SAT listening to the minister explain to one and all the commitment Brandon and Josh were making to one another. Nathan looked around the rooftop. It was the perfect place for a wedding. They had white magnolia arrangements placed on every table, along with pinecones holding name tags at each setting. All the white lights were lit up, and they had hung a chandelier above the dance floor where all the lights met. Nathan couldn’t believe this was the same place he had met David, the same spot David had stripped and danced on him, the place where they had first kissed. Nathan needed to stop thinking about that before he embarrassed himself.

  He looked at David sitting next to him and couldn’t believe they were together. It was official now. He had insisted on driving Nathan home from the hospital and stayed with him all day, not letting him lift a finger to help with the wedding preparations. David told him he would never make Nathan doubt his feelings ever again. He also informed him they would only be attending the wedding if Nathan promised to take it easy. He fireman-carried Nathan up the stairs to the roof—so hot. Nathan would have to figure out later if David’s dominant attitude bothered him; for now he felt protected and cared for, for the first time in his life.

  Nathan continued to take in everything around him, all the folks he had gotten to know over the past few weeks, and he couldn’t believe how much his life had changed. His eyes stopped on Brandon’s mom, sitting in the row of seats in front of them. She wore a gigantic hat with a feather plume sticking up from amongst a bushel of fake flowers and was wiping her eyes with a Kleenex. He thought it might be the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Nathan knew he would never have that, never have a mom who would cry tears of joy for him.