The Shoestring Club

by Sarah Webb

  I laugh. ‘Please, I’m starving and I’d kill for a steak. Tell her to put an enormous one aside for me and I’ll jump on my bike right now.’

  There’s a weighted pause. ‘Are you sure you should be cyc-ling, Jules? You’re supposed to be taking it easy.’

  ‘Stop being such a worry wart, I’ll be fine.’

  ‘There’s no major rush. Why don’t you get the DART? Please? Humour me. I’m sure Arietty won’t mind waiting a few minutes.’

  I sigh. She’s right. The doctor at St Vincent’s told me to stay off my bike for another week at least, or until my headaches have stopped.

  So I compromise. I cycle to the train station, lock my bike in the cycle rack and DART it to Monkstown. On the train, I gaze out of the window, thinking about what Anne said about talking to my family about Mum. I know she’s right and part of me wants to get it off my chest once and for all, whatever the consequences, but it terrifies me. Maybe I could start with Pandora. But not tonight, it’s Arietty’s Farenze handover dinner and I don’t want to steal her thunder.

  Arietty had rung my mobile several times on Sunday, the morning after her reunion do, but I was still in the hospital and my phone had run out of battery by that stage. By the time Pandora had brought in my charger and I’d had a chance to ring Arietty back, it was Sunday evening and from her frosty tone, I think she was a bit annoyed I’d taken so long to reply. But when I told her why she was contrite.

  ‘You poor thing,’ she’d said. ‘I had concussion once when Nina accidently headbutted me. It was horrid. Saw stars for days. And the headaches. Yuck! How are you feeling? Rotten?’

  ‘Pretty bruised and sore. But I was lucky I didn’t break anything.’ I told her the full story, including the bit about Ed being there; it felt good to talk to someone. And she didn’t ask me what the hell I was playing at with Ed, like Pandora had; she didn’t tut-tut and sigh in a stomach-clenching manner like Bird; she didn’t even get all hot and bothered about what might have happened if the leaves hadn’t been there, like Dad; she just said, ‘You’re right, you were very lucky. But I’m sorry you didn’t take Ed with you. I wish it had been his head you landed on, not those leaves. Appearing at your house like that uninvited. Stupid man.

  ‘So please tell me you’re completely over that creature now, Jules,’ she added succinctly. ‘And finally see him for the snake that he is.’ I think Arietty has always understood more about my poisonous attraction for Ed then anyone else, even though she’s never met him.

  ‘Completely.’

  ‘Hallelujah! Now I’m not going to tell you a thing about the reunion until our dinner on Friday night. You will be out of hospital by then, won’t you?’

  ‘Yes, absolutely, I’m looking forward to it. They’re keeping me in one or two more nights for observation, then I’ll be home.’

  I could almost hear the shiver in her voice. ‘I hate hospitals, they give me the heebie-jeebies, but I’ll come and visit if you’re desperate.’

  I laughed. ‘Friday’s good. But I’ll be expecting the full gory reunion details, so don’t disappoint me.’

  She chuckled. ‘I won’t. And I’ll ring you tomorrow, see how you’re doing. Don’t get too bored.’ And with that she was gone.

  Arietty was as good as her word – she rang me twice a day, during her lunch break and every evening at around seven. She made me laugh, telling me about clever things her elephants had done and gossip about the other keepers.

  Every time I put down the phone to her I smiled to myself. Over the week I became even more fond of Arietty. No, she didn’t have an expensive bouquet delivered to my house, like Ed. Guilt flowers, Bird called them. She told the rather shocked delivery man that they weren’t wanted and that he could keep them – heaven knows what the poor man thought. Arietty didn’t rush over with chocolates the minute I finally got home on Wednesday like Daphne either; and nor did she leave a bundle of new fashion magazines on the doorstep on Thursday morning like Jamie, bless him, but she kept me entertained on a daily basis with her regular as clockwork phone calls, and that meant a lot.

  Pandora was incredible, visiting every day. Sometimes she chatted about the shop, other times she just sat with me companionably, dealing with emails on her iPhone while I flicked through magazines. It was nice to have the company.

  Once I worked out who the magazines on the doorstep were from – a process of elimination – I finally plucked up the courage to ring Jamie to thank him on Thursday evening. My hands shook as I keyed in his number.

  ‘Jamie?’

  ‘Hi, Jules.’ He also sounded a bit nervous. ‘How are you feeling?’ I expected him to say something about Ed – I was positive Bird had told Daphne the whole story by now, and his mum was never one for keeping things to herself – but he didn’t.

  ‘OK, and I’m so sorry, Jamie. I’ve made such a mess of things. You were right about my drinking. It was getting out of hand. I’m seeing someone tomorrow. I’m having my first um, meeting, consultation, shrink visit? Whatever you call it.’

  ‘I’m glad you’re getting help, Jules.’

  His voice was so kind, so genuine, I found myself saying, ‘And I’m sorry about Ed and everything. Being taken in by him. Lying to you. I know it’s no excuse but I really did love him. He broke my heart when he went off with Lainey like that and I just couldn’t let go. But it’s over now, I’m finally moving on to pastures new. Or men new I should say.’ I gave a hollow laugh.

  Jamie was silent for a moment. Then finally he said, ‘He never deserved you, Jules. I’m glad you see that now.’ There was a catch in his voice and he quickly added, ‘Look, I’m sorry I have to go. But are you still planning on going to that bloody wedding on Saturday?’

  ‘Yes, why?’

  ‘I’m glad you’re getting the chance to wear that dress you’re so mad about, that’s all. Pink isn’t it?’

  ‘Yep, I’ll be collecting it at our handover dinner in Shoestring tomorrow evening.’ The thought of a night out with Arietty and Pandora had been keeping me going all week.

  ‘Enjoy yourselves.’

  I put down the phone, thinking how sweet it was of Jamie to remember the dress.

  On the train to Shoestring to meet the girls, I’m so lost in thought about Mum and Ed and Lainey and the wedding that I almost miss my stop. Luckily I spot the Monkstown sign while the doors are still open and nip through them just in time.

  Walking briskly it only takes me five minutes to get to Shoestring and I pause outside for a moment, looking at the shop window, lit up from behind. It looks fantastic. The elephants are still marching over the silk-covered ‘hills’. I smile to myself. They’ll have to come out soon, and in a funny way I’ll miss them. Pandora said the big ones can stay on either side of the door for now, which is just as well as we’d need a van to shift them. I think I’ll ask Bird to take the little ones home in her car for Iris. And Arietty might like one too, even if the tusks are ‘wrong’.

  While looking in the window I spot Arietty chatting to Pandora at the edge of my favourite booth. I watch for a second as Arietty covers her mouth with her hand and giggles into it, her eyes crinkling with delight. I wonder what Pandora has said that’s so funny. For a second I feel a dart of jealousy that they’re getting on so well – Arietty’s my friend, not Pandora’s – then I stop myself being so petty. I should be delighted that they like each other. I walk inside, determined to be my best self and not to drag the conversation down this evening with any talk of my accident or my session with Anne. And for the first time in years, I’m going to eat without washing down my dinner with wine.

  As I approach the booth, Arietty stands up and gives me a warm hug. She smells sweet, like icing sugar mixed with van-illa. Her strong arms give me one final squeeze, then let go.

  ‘How’s the head?’ she says, stepping back a little and checking me out. ‘Can’t see any lumps.’

  I smile. ‘There was an almighty egg right here.’ I touch the back of my skull gingerly. ‘But
it’s gone down now. Still pretty sore though.’

  ‘You poor creature. I’m just going to pee.’ Arietty points at the seat beside her. ‘Squeeze in there. Then when I get back I’ll tell you both all about my horrific ordeal.’

  I stare at her quizzically.

  She smiles. ‘The reunion.’

  I laugh. ‘Ah, right.’

  Arietty skips off, leaving Pandora and me alone. I slip into the booth and shuffle along the seat, so I’m sitting opposite her.

  ‘How are you feeling, Jules?’ She slides her hand across the table and touches my hand with her fingertips. ‘Bird said the counselling session took a lot out of you.’

  I whistle under my breath. ‘No kidding, it was pretty intense. The counsellor, Anne, was nice, but boy did I cry. Went through nearly a whole box of tissues.’

  She leans towards me, her face sympathetic. Pandora knows I hate crying in front of people. She’s exactly the same. ‘Cry? Did you tell her about . . . you know, the thing that happened in Dicey Reilly’s?’

  I nod. ‘Yeah. And about the accident, and Mum dying and everything.’

  She looks very surprised. ‘Wow, really? What was it like, telling a stranger about stuff like that? Was it weird?’

  I shrug. ‘Actually it was OK. Anne was pretty easy to talk to. She just sat there and listened.’

  ‘Did she give you any advice about the drinking?’

  ‘No, it wasn’t like that. And Pandora, I know we’ve never really talked about it, any of us, but there’s something I want to tell you, about Mum and about the day—’

  Arietty reappears so I stop abruptly.

  ‘Budge over,’ Arietty tells me and I scoot further along the seat.

  Pandora’s still looking at me, a strange expression on her face.

  I mouth ‘Later’ at her and she gives me a tiny nod then says, ‘Let’s order, girls. Klaudia put aside three steaks just in case. Do you like steak, Arietty?’

  Arietty’s eyes narrow and she practically growls at Pandora. ‘Do I look like a person who eats animals, Pandora Schuster?’

  Pandora blinks in fright. Arietty does look pretty scary. I lift my menu over my mouth to stifle my giggles.

  Pandora backtracks. ‘No, no of course not. I’m a big animal lover myself.’

  I give a little cough and Pandora glares at me.

  ‘Why don’t we all have fish?’ Pandora suggests instead.

  Arietty doesn’t look impressed. ‘Fish are animals too. They have eyes and brains. OK, not very big ones, but they still think.’

  Pandora reads the menu again. ‘Goat’s cheese and rocket tartlets?’ she says, failing to keep the disappointment out of her voice. ‘Or are you a vegan?’

  Arietty shakes her head. ‘No. The tartlets sound good.’

  I sigh inwardly. I was really looking forward to a big juicy steak. I put the menu on the table and press my head against the wooden seat back, remembering the bruise only after I’ve done it.

  ‘Ow,’ I say, rubbing my skull.

  ‘You hurting yourself again, Jules?’ Pandora says gently. ‘Be careful.’

  Then she looks around the table. ‘So it’s three goat’s cheese tartlets, yes? Any starters? The chicken liver pâté’s delicious, but I guess that’s out.’ She looks archly at Arietty, who has the good grace to smile back at her.

  ‘Oh, have your bloody steaks,’ Arietty says with a little huff, although I think it’s a bit put on. ‘Just do me a favour and eat them quickly, OK? And please don’t order them blue.’

  ‘Excellent.’ I sit up straighter, feeling instantly brighter. ‘I’ll have mine medium-rare with chips and garlic potatoes. I could eat the arse of an elephant I’m so hungry.’

  Arietty scrunches up her nose. ‘Jules, that’s gross.’

  I just grin at her.

  Once we’ve all placed our orders with Klaudia, I turn to Arietty. ‘So Dr Dolittle, you’ve kept us in suspense long enough. Reunion story please, full disclosure.’

  Arietty smiles. ‘No problem. I’ve been dying to tell you all week but I wanted to wait until we were all together. OK, so the taxi drive was uneventful, but I nearly barfed in the back I was so nervous. I got to the hotel – the Radisson Bleu, which is pretty swish – and I walked in and tried to remember what you told me, Jules, to hold my head up and not to slouch. There was a drinks reception in the bar first, so I headed towards it and I was so nervous my hands were shaking. It was quite dark and everyone was hovering around the bar in groups, it was like being in school again, all the hockey girls together, the prefects, the D4s, the drama club girls, it was terrifying.’ She gives a shiver.

  ‘I can imagine,’ I murmur.

  Arietty continues. ‘Luckily I spotted one of the girls from my class who was always fun, Denise. She was chatting to a gang of girls who were pretty much the brains of our year – Ash and Stephanie – nice girls, quiet, tended to keep to themselves. They all looked amazing in these 1950s style dresses, vintage Chanel and Dior apparently. Their make up was perfect, red lips and smoky eyes, and their hair was in fab old-fashioned buns. I honestly didn’t recognize any of them. Turns out they’d all hired their dresses in this vintage shop in Blackrock called Cocobelle and the owner had organized a hair and make up artist for them too. They’d had a day of pampering. You could do something like that here, girls.’

  Pandora nods. ‘That’s not a bad idea. Certainly something to consider. And what did they think of the Farenze?’

  Arietty beams. ‘Swooned over it. And they loved the jacket. I felt like a movie star. I told them all about your shop too.’

  ‘Good woman,’ Pandora says.

  ‘And what were the D4s wearing?’ I ask, already guessing the answer.

  Arietty rolls her eyes. ‘Full-length evening dresses slashed to their belly buttons and buckets of orange fake tan, very footballers’ wives. It’s funny, compared to Denise and her friends, they looked really out of date. But Sasha’s dress was pretty spectacular, red silk, slashed across the breasts and at the stomach. The D4s do love their slashes.’

  ‘Who’s Sasha?’ Pandora asks.

  ‘Sorry, Pandora,’ Arietty says, ‘she was head girl, and a real bully. But I have to admit she looked amazing. It was a while before I spotted her. I felt someone staring at me so I turned around and there she was.’

  Arietty puts on a snide sounding D4 accent. ‘She said “If it isn’t Little Miss Exotic? If it wasn’t for . . . like, you know, your skin, I never would have recognized you.”’

  I snort. ‘Cheeky little minx.’

  ‘She sounds a right cow,’ Pandora adds.

  ‘It gets worse, believe me,’ Arietty says. ‘From the way Sasha was slurring her words, I think she’d already had quite a bit to drink. After drinks, we sat down for dinner. Luckily only the top table was seated so I joined Denise’s gang. Then Sasha climbed onto a podium and welcomed us to ‘her’ reunion and then warned us she had lots of juicy gossip for her after-dinner speech. During dinner we chatted about what we were all up to now. Denise is almost qualified as a doctor which is pretty impressive. When I told them where I worked and what I did they all thought it was cool.’

  ‘Why wouldn’t they?’ I say. ‘It is cool.’

  She shrugs. ‘I think so. But I guess I was nervous of saying anything because of Sasha’s reaction. Anyway I spent most of the meal telling them about Beatrix and Enid and the gang.’

  Arietty pauses as Klaudia arrives with our food. We decided against starters, the desserts in Shoestring are to die for and we all want to leave room.

  I tuck quickly into my steak, practically moaning as I chew the tender meat. After several mouthfuls I realize I’m being very rude.

  ‘Sorry, Arietty,’ I say. ‘I’m ravenous. Tell us more about Denise and the gang. They sound really nice.’

  Arietty shrugs. ‘Yeah, they are. But apart from school we don’t have much in common. Although at the end of the evening, Denise did suggest starting a Sasha Davenport hate club, meeting
every month to stick pins in a wax doll. Sasha’s speech was pretty appalling.’

  ‘Go on,’ Pandora says eagerly. ‘What did she say?’

  Arietty shifts around in her seat a little, getting comfortable. ‘It all started off innocently enough. But it was clear she’d been laying into the wine at dinner big time. She staggered back onto the podium and thanked the usual people. Then she pulled out this sheet of paper, said it was her gossip list. Admitted she’d spent the previous month googling old girls, checking out their Facebook pages and basically stalking everyone. There was a lot of nervous coughing in the room as you can imagine.’

  ‘OK, Arietty,’ I say, ‘that’s just freaky.’

  ‘I know,’ Arietty says. ‘And she didn’t hold back during her speech. First up she read out a list of people who had sent their regrets. One of them was Em Hardman. She read out her email which said she couldn’t come to the reunion ’cause she’d lost a baby recently and wasn’t up to socializing. Sasha read out every word, including some really personal stuff that I’m sure was meant just for her.’

  Pandora gasps. ‘Seriously said that? In front of everyone?’

  Arietty nods. ‘Yep. But believe me, it gets worse. Sasha spot- ted Denise and waved. She said, “I found a lovely picture of you on the Dublin LGBTQ Pride march last year, Denise.” Then she explained that LGBTQ stands for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning. And she flashed up a picture on this big tv screen of Denise in a curly pink wig, holding a placard saying, “Out and Proud”. Denise was mortified at first, but then everyone started clapping and cheering and yelling, “Good for you, Denise” and I think she was quite touched. But Sasha didn’t look too pleased. I’m sure she thought we’d all be shocked.

  ‘Then a video clip started playing on the screen. This time it was me, talking to some children at the zoo. The sound wasn’t great so you couldn’t hear what I was saying, but during the clip Beatrix squirts me with water from her trunk and I get drenched. It’s on the Dublin Zoo website. Apparently it’s one of the most popular clips – kids love it.