Evil Genius 3: Becoming the Apex Supervillain

by Logan Jacobs

  “Call an ambulance,” I told Penumbra.

  “Okay,” she said as she floated down from her perch on top of the bus, “but aren’t we going to help the kids get to safety?”

  “No,” I said as I glanced further down the road, where the Golem was only a speck in the distance. “We need to follow him, and they aren’t in any danger here anymore.”

  “Right, of course,” she agreed, and then she flew up next to the broken windows of the bus. “Stay here and don’t go anywhere! Someone will be on their way to help you soon!”

  Once the schoolchildren were taken care of and an ambulance was called, we started back off down the road after the Golem. He’d gotten farther ahead of us than I would have liked due to our delay, but the trail was still easy to follow once we picked it up again.

  “So…” Penumbra floated alongside me as I ran down the road in pursuit of our target. “What’s it like, working with Miles?”

  I tried not to groan audibly. If she was more clever and less straightforward of a person, I’d have thought she was trying to probe for information for the Shadow Knight, but I had a feeling I knew what she was after.

  “He’s great,” I said finally. “Every plan he makes is brilliant. He leaves no room for error and takes everyone’s strengths into account, so we all work together really well.”

  As I said it, I reflected on how true a statement it was. Miles really did think of everything, and although Penumbra was a bit annoying to work with because of how little she understood her powers, I could see how her abilities would work well with mine. Our personalities might clash, and she definitely acted like the definition of a “dumb blonde,” but she could be really useful in a fight if she could pull herself together and drop the act.

  “No, not like that!” the blonde huffed. “I mean more like… you know…”

  “I know?” I asked with a raised eyebrow.

  “You know…” Penumbra trailed off coyly. “Really working with him. Closely.”

  “Like… my relationship with him?” I wished she would just get to the point already.

  “What’s he like in bed?” she blurted out. “I bet he’s great. He seems really attentive and really smart, so I bet he pays you a ton of attention and knows exactly where to touch-- and he’s probably really intense, right? With tons of stamina, and--”

  “Okay, enough.” I put up a hand to stop her.

  “Boo, you’re no fun,” she pouted as she circled in the air around me again. “Come on. He’s huge, right? I bet he’s huge.”

  “I’m not answering that,” I told her, but it only made her snicker again.

  “He totally is!” she squealed. “Hey, is he into threesomes? We could both--”

  She suddenly cut herself off and shook her head, then pointed down the road. Her powers must also give her slightly better eyesight than me, because it took a moment for me to focus that far off into the distance.

  We had ended up in front of a mall, and one of the department store entrances was torn apart as if something had just crashed right through it. I could hear the screams of civilians as they evacuated the mall and got crushed under the Golem’s debris.

  “Alright, we need a plan,” I said as I slowed to a stop, and then I realized that Penumbra’s entire demeanor had changed.

  “Um, okay,” she murmured without much energy.

  “I’m going to need you to fly in there first to distract him, since throwing a car at him only made him angrier,” I told her as I reasoned out a new plan based on our previous attempt. “His intelligence is closer to an animal than a human, so it should be easy for you. Just fly around and keep out of his reach. You’re fast, and he’s a huge, lumbering rock monster, so you should be able to avoid him.”

  “Do I really have to go in first?” she muttered as she fidgeted with her hands and refused to meet my eyes. “Can’t you? Or like, can’t you just throw something at him again?”

  “No, I have to be the one to surprise him this time,” I said. “I might be strong, but he’s made entirely out of rock. He’ll be tough to take down on my own.”

  Was she really trying to back down now? I was already annoyed after her lack of understanding her powers had nearly gotten a bus full of kids tossed off a bridge, but how could she call herself a hero if she couldn’t even handle a fight with a pile of rocks?

  “I mean,” she started as she looked down at my boots instead of my eyes. “You can go in first and I’ll come help. Like you just, uh, start punching and attacking him, and then I’ll come in and--”

  “No, that won’t work,” I cut her off. “He’ll just be too angry and cause more collateral damage, like on the bridge. You really have to go in first and distract him, so I can get in some good hits before he ever notices me. Otherwise, we might both get seriously injured, and you’ll endanger even more civilians. That mall is packed. Don’t you care about the people in there?”

  I didn’t want to preach at her needlessly, but I was frustrated. We could still hear the screams from the mall-goers in the distance, and she didn’t seem able to move.

  “I’ve fought villains before, but they were just, like… normal people,” she said. “I mean, not normal since they were crazy, but they didn’t have superpowers or anything. That thing is strong enough to pick up an entire bus! I can’t fight that.”

  “Listen, I get that it’s a lot to deal with,” I said in my best attempt to soothe her nervousness. “But this is our mission, and if we don’t do this, no one else will. Or, worse, we’ll have to call Miles over to help, and it’ll piss him off. He’ll think you aren’t very good. Don’t you want to impress him?”

  “Yeah,” she huffed. “I’m really not scared, alright? I’m just nervous. I’ve never fought anything with superpowers, and I don’t want to mess up again. Do you really think that Miles will be impres--”

  “You won’t mess up, and we’ll make sure no one else gets hurt,” I assured her. “Just like we promised.”

  “Okay,” she said as she took a deep breath. “I’ll, um, go in first, then.”

  I gave her a nod of encouragement of my own, and then I watched as she flew off toward the mall. I followed at a slight distance and without superspeed, so I wouldn’t draw as much attention. A few civilians ran past us and gaped at the floating woman, but they didn’t stop to gawk for long. It seemed like most of the mall goers had evacuated by the time we arrived, and the entrance was empty other than a pair of legs and a puddle of blood belonging to someone that had been crushed under a fallen pillar.

  Racks of clothes and jewelry counters were crushed and knocked over as well, with their contents scattered all over the floor. Thankfully, no bodies were crushed under those. The Golem hadn’t even tried to take any of the expensive jewelry with him either, so it really was just wanton destruction by a mindless, barely sentient monster. I could hear the crunch of concrete up ahead, so I figured we were close.

  “Alright, I’ll be right behind you,” I reassured Penumbra.

  She swallowed, nodded, and then flew out of the department store and into the mall plaza.

  I crept close to the side of the wall, and I kept myself hidden as Penumbra floated toward the food court. I didn’t think a rock monster had much interest in food either, but he’d flipped over most of the tables and was currently stomping on one of the mall’s screen maps that he’d knocked on top of someone who was now only a smushed pile of guts and a single arm that flopped uselessly with each stomp.

  I could tell the numerous and gory casualties had upset Penumbra by how she fluttered around in the air with obvious hesitation, but the blonde eventually flew up close to the Golem.

  “H-hey!” she shouted. “You! Ugly!”

  She waved her arms frantically, but the Golem just ignored her and continued to stomp on the screen with a wet crunch of human bones.

  “Hey!” she shouted again as she flew closer. “I’m talking to you!”

  The Golem still didn’t respond. I sighed, because I
knew she was going to need to throw something at him or interact physically in order to get his attention. He wasn’t smart enough to understand or care that she was trying to get his attention by yelling.

  Penumbra continued to keep her distance and shout fruitlessly at the rock creature, but it wasn’t working, so I figured it was time for me to do something. I grabbed a piece of debris from the floor, kept my footsteps quiet, moved to a column behind Penumbra, and then chucked the piece of debris toward the Golem’s head. My aim was immaculate, and it struck him directly in the back of the head. I immediately ducked back behind the column as Penumbra gasped.

  “What are you doing?” she yelled, but my plan had worked perfectly.

  The rock monster let out a bellowing roar and turned. Penumbra was in exactly the right spot, so his attention immediately locked onto her. Then he let out another roar and charged her, and that made him crash right into the column I was using as a hiding spot.

  I rolled out of the way and ducked behind another pillar, but it wouldn’t have mattered if he saw me. The Golem only had eyes for Penumbra now, and he swung his arms in an attempt to catch her and slap her out of the air, while she flew just out of his reach. She was no longer trying to shout insults at him anymore, and her face was stricken with fear as she dodged each of the Golem’s blows.

  I flexed my wrists and my fingers, but I had faith in Miles’ upgraded technology. Punching through rock wasn’t pleasant, even for someone as strong as I was, so I really hoped his new upgrades would provide more shock resistance.

  “Keep it facing that way,” I commanded through our connected earpieces. “I’ll hit it from behind.”

  That got a startled laugh out of her, much to my annoyance.

  “Not like--” I started to protest.

  “I know!” she giggled in a high-pitched, nervous way. “Sorry! It was just kind of funny!”

  I restrained myself from saying anything else, and I instead ran out from behind the pillar to charge the Golem. With my running start, I leapt into the air and pulled back my arm to deliver a powerful punch directly to the center of his back. My knuckles met sturdy rock with a crunch that smashed a craterous dent into his rocky body. Then I flipped backward to land on my feet and brace against the ground as the Golem threw up his arms and bellowed.

  Penumbra followed my lead and flew around to get right in his face, so she could keep him from noticing me.

  “Heeeeeey!” she screeched practically loud enough to break the sound barrier, and it worked well enough to keep his eyes off of me.

  The Golem swatted the air in front of him, and Penumbra dodged out of the way. I took the opportunity to run forward again, this time to slam my fist into the back of one of his rocky knees. The creature buckled as I swung backward, and I immediately followed up my punch with a kick against his leg. The immense power that my punches and kicks packed was enough to drill massive dents into his body, and soon the leg I had assaulted was crumbling apart.

  With a loud, craggly scrape of rock against tile, the monster pushed himself back up onto his feet. Parts of his leg had indeed crumbled away, but he didn’t even notice, so I wondered if he just didn’t feel the pain or if he was just too stupid to care. All he seemed to care about was Penumbra, and the blonde woman floated away as the rock-monster swiped at her for the hundredth time.

  I was probably going to have to try to break him apart completely in order to keep him from getting back up. From the research we’d collected, the Golem had a central core in the middle of his chest that allowed him to control his limbs. Breaking that would kill him, which we weren’t allowed to do, but as long as the core was left in-tact, I could shatter his limbs and render him immobile to capture.

  It’d be an easy enough task with competent backup like Miles or Norma, but Penumbra was only good for a distraction. She even looked tired already, and that worried me. Most of the heavy lifting was going to be all on me, so I’d have to get it done fast.

  I cracked my knuckles and got back to work.

  Penumbra shrieked, and I looked up to see the blonde woman had drifted up thirty or so feet.

  “H-he nearly grabbed me!” she cried and hugged her arms around herself.

  “Focus!” I yelled back as my stomach dropped. “I have a plan! Keep him distracted! You’re going to lose his attention!”

  She didn’t ask for the details of my plan, but they didn’t really concern her anyway. As long as she kept his attention off of me, I’d be able to shatter apart his limbs in no time. Penumbra warily floated back down to hover just out of the Golem’s reach.

  This time, as he lifted one arm to swing at her again, I darted over and leapt up to grab it. Then I wrapped my arms around his lumbering rock-arm and squeezed hard enough to crunch through slowly. He bellowed out a roar and shook his arm, but I held on.

  I wasn’t strong enough to crush pure rock just by squeezing it, but I’d created a pretty significant dent, so I let go of his arm and dropped back down to the ground, and sediment crumbled after me. The Golem seemed to be struggling to lift that arm now, and that was a good sign.

  As Penumbra flitted in front of his face again and he tried to hit her, I jumped upward to slam my fist right through his elbow joint. The rock monster staggered, and I backed up as his arm splintered off into a pile of debris.

  “Whoa!” Penumbra cheered. “That was awe--”

  She’d been so captivated by my destruction of the monster’s arm that she hadn’t noticed his other arm coming toward her. But instead of slapping her to the ground, he snatched her up in his fist and started to squeeze, much like I had done to his arm.

  “Shit!” I cursed. “Hold on!”

  I darted through the rock monster’s legs and managed to take him momentarily off-balance. He didn’t fall over, but the time he took to reorient himself was enough for me to position myself beneath the elbow of his remaining arm.

  Penumbra shrieked and gasped as the Golem squeezed the life out of her. I had one chance to land this hit and free her, or he’d crush her to death. There was no way I could weaken the joints or the rock-arm holding her like I had for his other one, so I’d have to put my full faith in Miles’ enhancements on my suit to save her.

  I powered up my super-enhanced fist and burst upwards. With a sickening crunch, I slammed my fist directly into the weak point of the rock monster’s elbow joint. I punched clean through the rock, and the shockwaves reverberated through my arm, down my shoulder, and into my legs like I’d just uppercutted a building.

  Then the building crumbled.

  I landed back on the ground and shook my arm loose, but the shock easily subsided.

  The arm that had been holding Penumbra crashed to the ground, and she clawed herself free. She was hyperventilating from the shock of nearly having been crushed to death, and after I caught my breath, I approached her and offered a hand to help her get back up.

  “Thanks,” she croaked.

  “Without arms, he should be a lot easier to handle,” I said, but I didn’t comment on the fact that it had been her easily distracted nature that had gotten her caught. As far as I could tell, she was kind of a complete ditz, so I didn’t think that would help her.

  “Okay,” she said as she dusted herself off. “Let’s take him in, then.”

  Penumbra clenched her fists like she was ready to get right back into it. I was glad to see that she wasn’t going to run off and hide, even after she’d gotten hurt. Maybe it helped that she was no longer really in any danger, since both of his arms were disabled. He couldn’t grab her anymore, and he didn’t even have a neck to be able to headbutt her.

  I ran after Penumbra as I powered up my fist again and crunched right into the back of the Golem’s knee. It was the same one I’d already hit before, so it shattered without much resistance, and he crashed to the ground. His final remaining limb thrashed around like a massive rock worm with half its body cut off, but he wasn’t any threat at all with just one leg. He wouldn’t be getting
back up any time soon.

  I breathed out a sigh of relief and wiped some sweat away from my forehead. It felt like I’d mostly fought that entire battle solo, but I guessed I could give Penumbra a bit of credit.

  “We did it!” She landed next to me and flipped her blonde hair like there was some kind of audience, but the mall was still entirely empty.

  “Yeah,” I said. “That was some good team--”

  “That was awesome!” my blonde partner interrupted as she spun around in a circle.

  I grimaced because she’d only gotten caught by the Golem in the first place when she’d tried to stop and comment on how cool it had been. The way she postured and congratulated me made me think of the Wardens, and it was a wonder she didn’t take out her phone to snap a few selfies next to the rock monster’s still thrashing body.

  “How do we move him?” she asked.

  “We don’t have to,” I said. “We can just call the prison over, and they can come collect his main body.”

  “I guess we did do all the heavy-lifting,” Penumbra said. “Well, you did, anyway.”

  I flexed my fingers and smiled down at my gloved hand. There really was no way I could have hit that hard without the help of Miles’ technology. He might not have been here, but he’d really been the one who saved Penumbra’s life.

  I wasn’t about to tell her that, though.

  “You know, I wanted to be a part of the Wardens once,” Penumbra started as we collected up the Golem’s limbs to dispose of them.

  “Oh, yeah?” I asked, even though I’d already come to that conclusion on my own.

  “Yeah,” she said. “I tried really hard. Really put all my effort into it! I wanted to be a Warden so, so, badly… But I just wasn’t good enough for them. They said I was too nervous, and that my power wouldn’t work very well on their team. I think they were just being nice about saying that my power sucks.”