Awakening Her Soul to Destiny

by Deborah R Stigall

  Once again the heather covered hills and jutting crags stark against the deep blue sky took her breath away. She had traveled all over the United States and enjoyed many breathtaking views, but there was something so familiar…so magnetic about the landscape of Scotland. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it but it seemed as though the land called out to her.

  Screeching to an abrupt stop in front of the bed and breakfast she had just recently vacated, Hobart stared straight ahead, refusing to budge from the seat. Smiling to herself, Kaitla let herself out of the car. Turning to stick her head back through the open window, Kaitla grinned at Hobart, “I won’t be long, I promise.”

  A gruff “Hmmpf!” was the only response as the elderly man continued to stare out the window, pretending as though Kaitla’s actions had no effect on him whatsoever.

  Shaking her head in amusement, Kaitla spun on her heel and nearly tripped over the black dog she’d befriended last night. “How did you get here?” she asked in amazement as she patted the friendly black head.

  Wagging his tail and panting, the friendly canine sat obediently at Kaitla’s feet; familiar gray eyes upturned expectantly. Unable to resist him, Kaitla crouched down to tousle his fur and scratch behind his ears. The black beast snuggled even closer in her embrace, nuzzling her neck with his cold wet nose.

  Giggling, Kaitla gently pushed the dog away, “Stop that! It tickles…now you stay here while I go use the phone. Then maybe we’ll go see if anybody knows who you belong to.” Starting towards the door, Kaitla looked back to discover the faithful beast close at her heels. Sternly pointing a finger at his long nose, Kaitla repeated firmly, “I said STAY.” Continuing through the door, a faint whine alerted her to the fact that her devoted friend was in fact NOT staying and was determined to remain by her side. Holding the door open, Kaitla pointed toward the sidewalk, “Out…you can’t come in here,” she explained with exasperation. The kindly mutt sat stubbornly at her feet, gazing up into her eyes and refusing to move.

  “Och, lassie it seems ye’ve found yerself a new friend,” laughed the kindly owner. Mr. Lochlan slowly ambled over to pat the dog gently on the head, as he held the door open for Kaitla.

  Smiling, Kaitla agreed, “He just kinda’ came out of nowhere. I don’t know who he belongs to and I don’t have the heart to run him off,”

  Mr. Lochlan peered at the devoted canine through his wire-rimmed spectacles, “Well now, ye wouldna’ want to run off such a good laddie as this…now would ye?” he observed, as he scratched the dog under the chin.

  “He is kind of cute,” admitted Kaitla, reluctantly, “Do you mind if he stays with me while I use the phone?”

  “Why no, lass…go right ahead. The laddie can stay by ye if he wishes…he seems ta’ be quite taken with ye, and I wouldna’ want ta’ break his little heart,” grinned Mr. Lochlan.

  Smiling her thanks, Kaitla seated herself at the public phone and began the tedious task of securing an overseas operator and connection to New York. Idly reaching down to rub the dog at her feet, Kaitla impatiently counted the rings and mentally ordered Nettie to answer the damn phone. When the phone finally picked up, Kaitla prepared to pounce upon her unsuspecting agent, only to discover she was merely going to be attacking the noncommittal answering machine.

  Huffing in disgust, Kaitla slammed down the phone, her only satisfaction being that Nettie was going to be charged with an overseas call that told her absolutely nothing. “Well good! Let her wonder what she’s gotten me into,” she muttered to herself. Then wryly she admitted, “Like Nettie’s going to wonder!” Nettie had been her agent for over ten years and was almost a friend. Kaitla never allowed anyone to get too close; relationships were just too risky. She’d learned that well enough as a child.

  A deep low growl from the dog at her side interrupted her reverie. Glancing quickly at the angry beast, she frowned at the sight of his raised hackles and bared teeth. “What’s wrong, doggie?” she asked as she looked in the direction the agitated dog was staring. Across the room, sat a huge man, his face dark and intense with hatred. His long black hair was pulled sternly back from his frowning face, his pointed beard only accentuating the impression of evil. The man watched the canine with loathing, clenching his fists as though ready to break the animal in two.

  Hugging her friend to her side, Kaitla was suddenly glad the stray had appeared to keep her company on her little excursion into town. There was definitely something quite disturbing about the man sitting beside the doorway. Kaitla decided she agreed wholeheartedly with the dog’s apparent feelings toward the stranger.

  Calling to the owner, Kaitla rose to leave, “Thank you, Mr. Lochlan. I charged the call to my agent, so, there shouldn’t be any fees appearing on your bill.”

  Waiving over the book he was reading, Mr. Lochlan smiled from his rocker, “Ye’re quite welcome, lass. Come again when ye have time ta’ sit for a while.” He idly glanced over at the stranger sitting by the doorway, knuckles whitening as he gripped the cover of his book even tighter.

  Edging her way past the malignant glare of the stranger, Kaitla pulled the dog beside her and rushed outside. Thankfully, Hobart already had the engine running, so, Kaitla didn’t bother suppressing the urge to jump into the car ---animal in tow and slam the door safely shut.

  Eyeing her curiously, Hobart quietly asked, “Are ye all right, Miss?” as he adjusted the rearview mirror with his gnarled old hand.

  Glancing out the window at the dark man now emerging from the inn, Kaitla quickly locked the doors, “I’m fine, Hobart but let’s just get out of here.” The look of horror appearing on Hobart’s face as he recognized the approaching man did nothing to settle Kaitla’s nerves.

  Slamming his foot to the floorboard, Hobart tore away from the sidewalk so fast Kaitla was thrown back against the seat. “We’re on our way, Miss!” he stated firmly, leaning on the horn to clear a path.

  “Who was that, Hobart?” Kaitla asked breathlessly as she settled herself more comfortably on the seat.

  Eyeing her nervously in the rearview mirror, Hobart cleared his throat, “I…uh…dunno, Miss…but I didna’ like the looks of him.”

  “Me either,” Kaitla admitted hugging the beast at her side. “Thank you, fella. I’m so glad you were there,” she murmured softly into his ear. The fluffy tail thumped the seat in response and Kaitla smiled into the adoring gray eyes.

  Chapter IV

  Arriving back at the estate, Kaitla quickly dressed in her work clothes. “Time to get to work,” she announced to Tobias, gathering up her large sketchpad. Setting her chin firmly, she made up her mind. She was tired of waiting. It was time to meet Mrs. Balmurray whether she was ready or not.

  Wandering towards what she thought must be the center of the house, Kaitla wondered in which direction she might have the most success. Pausing at the intersection of four long hallways, Kaitla cocked her head to one side…listening intently. Very faintly, she could hear the sweet strains of music floating from one of the hallways. Taking this as a sign, she quickly took that direction searching for the room where the haunting notes from a piano and violin were gently calling. She knew this music! She breathlessly hummed along with the tune. Where had she heard it before?

  Finally reaching the door, the piano and violin beckoned, inviting her to join them. Feeling like a child sneaking into the cupboard for cookies, Kaitla hesitantly eased the door open, peering through the crack in an attempt to catch a glimpse of the mysterious musicians without giving herself away. The figure at the keyboard of the piano turned slightly towards her smiling, “Come in, child, we’ve been awaitin’ ye.”

  Jared and Etain had discussed the close encounter with Ravon in town today. They both agreed it was time for Kaitla to learn of her past and begin to hone her still unknown powers. Ravon’s impatience to follow them this morning had convinced Jared they couldn’t afford to wait any longer. The time to move was now.

  The delicate woman at the piano extended a hand towards her, sil
ently summoning Kaitla to her side. Mesmerized by the music and the tiny woman’s eyes, Kaitla approached the piano, sitting on the bench beside her. “Hello, Kaitla, I’m Etain…Etain Balmurray.” She smiled warmly, resting a pale slender hand upon Kaitla’s arm.

  Looking into the large dark eyes, Kaitla instinctively felt that somehow she knew this woman. Across the room, she heard a slight cough. Looking up, she found Jared standing by a huge bay window with a violin and bow resting in his arms. Tearing her gaze away from Jared’s penetrating eyes, Kaitla turned to Etain trying to shake away the hypnotic cocoon surrounding her senses.

  “I’m pleased to finally meet you, Mrs. Balmurray. The music you were playing called out to me …I had to follow it---I...I’m sorry if I’ve intruded.” She found herself babbling like a teenager trying to explain why she’d missed her curfew.

  Etain rose from the polished piano bench, seeming to glide across the room to a large table. The table was as big as the study tables in the huge old library where Kaitla had spent hours pouring over books about famous artists. The artist within her vaguely noticed this was the first room in the house that was decorated and exploding with color. A deep burgundy carpet covered the entire room and heavy floral draperies hung from the windows. The walls were panels of rich cherry wood, warm and inviting, adorned with massive paintings of soothing landscapes. Several vases were strategically placed on tables around the room. These were filled to over-flowing with heavily scented peonies, the creamy whites and pinks in perfect harmony with the rest of the setting.

  “Think nothing of it, child. After all, that was the song that was played after your parents were first wed. ‘Twas the first song they danced to once they were joined. It’s only natural that it should speak to ye.” Etain gently rearranged some of the papers scattered across the table, motioning to Jared to come closer.

  Kaitla frowned in confusion, glancing first at Etain, then Jared. “You m..must be mistaken,” Kaitla stammered, “I have no parents…I was an orphan and spent my childhood in foster homes.” She glanced nervously between Etain and Jared. Something about the way they were looking at her was extremely unnerving. Not malicious, but as though they were about to clue her in on some great secret.

  “No, lass, ye werena’ orphaned at all. Your father is aged but he’s quite alive and well,” Etain corrected with a smile, gently motioning for Kaitla to join her at the long table.

  Swallowing hard with a frown, Kaitla again risked a glance at Jared, now standing silently beside the piano. His face was completely devoid of expression and she couldn’t pick up a clue in those deep-set eyes. She joined Etain at the table, staring in shock at the display spread before her. The entire table was covered with dozens of sketches both in pastels and charcoal. Sketches Kaitla had done throughout her life.

  “I don’t know what to say.” Absent-mindedly shuffling through the scattered sketches, Kaitla silently wondered, “Where had Etain gotten these? Nettie didn’t even have access to her original sketches. She only showed potential buyers photographs --And what in God’s name did she mean about her father being alive and well?”

  Etain reached across the table, selecting one of the oil pastel sketches and placed it before Kaitla. “Do ye remember this one?” Etain quietly observed Kaitla while she slowly picked up the sketch, studying the peaceful green landscape with graceful trees in full leaf. A tiny rivulet passed through the trees, wildflowers sprouting everywhere. She had drawn this her first year of high school! Kaitla suddenly remembered sitting cross-legged in her tiny twin bed, drawing this scene to escape the loneliness and pain of the real world where she’d never seemed to quite fit in.

  “Where did you get this?” Kaitla demanded, handing the picture back to Etain. Staring directly into Etain’s dark fathomless eyes, “The last time I saw this picture it was packed away in storage several years ago.”

  “This is the view to the east of yer father’s castle,” Etain explained, ignoring Kaitla’s question. “The view before the land was cursed….ye’ve seen it with yer heart, child…do ye no’ remember?”

  Panic rising, Kaitla crossed to the opposite side of the table nearest the door. “Who are you and what do you want from me? Stop this strange game of yours and tell me what’s going on!”

  At this outburst, Etain arched her brows, casting a quickly hidden smile at Jared. “Remind ye of anyone ye know, Jared?”

  “Aye, Etain, she’s her father made over.” Jared folded his arms across his chest, cocking his head to one side and studying her as if she were on display. His slight smile was sympathetic and something else. There was another emotion playing across his features that she couldn’t quite define.

  “If you two don’t start explaining immediately what this is all about, I am out of here!” Kaitla snapped. Turning abruptly, she latched onto the doorknob to emphasize this last statement.

  When neither of them replied, she jerked the door open, triggering Etain and Jared to cry aloud in unison, “Wait!”

  Kaitla slowly closed the door, then turned, facing the two of them. “I want answers and I want them now,” she stated calmly. Inside she was trembling with uncertainty but she had learned long ago to maintain a cool façade in order to survive uncomfortable situations. Mentally, she scored the current situation at about a twelve on her one to ten scale of uncomfortable.

  Exchanging quick glances, Etain and Jared seemed to come to a decision. “If ye’ll but come inside and have a seat, Etain and I will try to explain.” Jared approached her cautiously, holding out his hand as though she was a colt on the verge of bolting. “I know your first day here was a bit unnerving and these have only confused ye more,” He motioned with his other hand towards the table containing the sketches. He continued holding out his hand in supplication, then softly let it drop to his side when he realized Kaitla wasn’t ready to trust him.

  Taking this as a signal, Etain moved to the cushioned seat beneath the bay window. “Jared, come and sit,” she said, patting the cushion beside her, “Then perhaps Kaitla will be kind enough to join us and hear her story.” Casting one glance in Kaitla’s direction, Jared joined Etain on the window seat, slowly shaking his head. His blank guarded expression replaced by one of grim resolution.

  No longer feeling cornered, yet not entirely comfortable, Kaitla cautiously moved to a chair across from them and waited. This was beginning to feel like a chess game, with each player carefully sizing up the next move to control the outcome of the game. It was now their move.

  “Do ye ken anything of the legends of Ireland and Scotland, Kaitla? Have ye heard of the Tuatha De Danann?” Etain watched Kaitla carefully as she spoke.

  “Yes… I’ve read a few of the stories.” Kaitla spoke slowly trying to figure out what Celtic legends had to do with her current situation. “In fact, that’s how I chose my last name…why?” Glancing at Jared, she noticed his gaze had dropped to his carefully folded hands in his lap.

  “Then ye’ll know the Danann’s are the divine race that rule in the Clas Myrddin. The realms that may be reached through the sidhe or faerie mounds,” Etain quietly replied. Etain stood, walking slowly back to the table littered with the sketches. She eyed Kaitla carefully, drawing a deep breath, “Kaitla Danann, ye are of that divine race and the time has come for ye to return to the realm of your birth and fulfill your destiny.”

  Kaitla stared at Etain wondering if she’d heard her correctly. This poor woman was obviously deranged, one of those rich eccentric types that couldn’t quite keep up with reality. Etain visibly straightened, replying, “I am not daft.” Noting Kaitla’s surprised expression, she added, “Yes, I can hear yer thoughts and if ye’d but listen w’your heart instead of yer ears, ye could hear me and understand what ye know ta’ be the truth!”

  “I really think accepting this project was a mistake, Mrs. Balmurray,” Kaitla murmured, rising from the chair. “I’m sure Nettie will refund any money you’ve already invested. We’ll also refund the airfare.” Sidling toward the door,
she was determined to make her exit from this twilight zone as quickly as possible. Etain Balmurray was obviously way beyond eccentric…this woman needed professional help.

  Etain’s face settled into a grim expression of determination as she slowly returned to her seat. “Ye will not leave until ye have heard it all,” she intoned sternly. She glared at Kaitla with her huge dark eyes. Instantly, Kaitla felt as though her body was somehow detached from her mind. For some reason, she returned to the chair, quickly sitting. It was as though someone else controlled her body and all she could do was sit idly by and watch. Trying to open her mouth, Kaitla found she was completely paralyzed. She couldn’t move, she couldn’t speak, she was a captive in her own body.

  “Verra effective, Etain,” Jared observed drolly. “And why have ye no’ shared that trick with me?” he asked, arching an eyebrow in Kaitla’s direction.

  Etain glared reprovingly at Jared, “Hush, lad and mind your manners. ‘Tis your own fault the lass doesna’ trust ye.” At this rebuke, Jared bowed his head with shame, eyeing Kaitla apologetically through his dark lashes.

  Finished with her recriminations, Etain took a deep breath and began the tale of Laird Caymber and Lady Bristna, the cruel Laird Ravon and the hopeless realm of Clas Myrddin. As she spoke, she held both hands before her, palms up. Images of the people she was describing materialized just above both hands, replaying the past in front of Kaitla’s eyes in what appeared to be a three-dimensional hologram. Etain was thorough, leaving nothing out. Kaitla witnessed the rape and beating of Lady Bristna, the union of the Laird and his Lady, the birth of their child and the terrible murder of the new mother. Caught up in the drama before her eyes, but still entirely under Etain’s control; the only response Kaitla was capable of was the silent tears that filled her eyes to over flowing, then ran coursing down her cheeks. To convince Kaitla further of the truth of her words, Etain proceeded to show her the past of the babe itself. As she watched the images of the child growing older, the truth suddenly struck her. The child Kaitla was watching was herself. The images she was seeing were her own memories but from an entirely different angle. This time, she was seeing the memories as an observer instead of remembering them from the viewpoint of the participant. As incredulous as Etain’s tale was, Kaitla slowly began to believe her. As soon as Etain sensed her acceptance, Kaitla could once again move and speak. Now, though, she had no idea what to say or where to go.