The Pregnant Intern

by Carol Marinelli

  'Next time we'll take the ferry over there.' Jeremy broke into her daydream. 'There's some beautiful restaurants.'

  Alice shook her head with a lazy smile. 'They couldn't beat this.'

  But Jeremy begged to differ. Pushing her gently back onto the sand, he kissed her slowly, deeply, with salty lips. 'Want to bet?' he said, breaking away. 'I was about to say there's also some magnificent accommodation. We could be on our way upstairs now to a massive four-poster bed in the honeymoon suite.'

  'Oh, well, in that case...'

  So they ambled back, hand in hand and, though there wasn't a four-poster bed, nor a silver service restaurant downstairs, their love-making was every bit as romantic and tender as that of newly-weds. She knew there were issues to be faced; they both did. They didn't have the luxury of taking things slowly—the imminence of the baby and the fact that Jeremy was here, sharing in this precious time, spoke volumes. And though they both knew there was a lot to discuss, for this weekend at least they let the bigger picture rest, instead concentrating on each other. Their deep, emerging feelings for each other in no way compromised or conflicted with their emotions for the unborn baby. Instead, they were forging a foundation on which to build before the world rushed in and had its say.

  It was Jeremy who broached the subject first.

  'How's your blood pressure now?'

  'Hmm?' Alice half opened her eyes as Jeremy, sitting on the sofa behind her, skilfully massaged her shoulders. 'It's probably so low Brett Halliday will admit me with hypotension.'

  Alice was sitting on the floor so she didn't see Jeremy's eyes narrow, but she felt his fingers stiffen on her bare shoulders and she wriggled uncomfortably.

  'Why don't you call it a day, Alice? We've got one helluva week coming up, and surely it can't be good for you, or the baby.'

  It was Alice that stiffened now. 'You think I'd put the baby at risk?' She shrugged his hands off.

  For the moment Jeremy tried to ignore her injured tones as he gently persisted. 'Of course not,' he said, replacing his hands and carrying on the massage. 'I know it's all happened really quickly, no one is more surprised than me how things have worked out, Alice, but I'm ready for this, I really am. I feel as if I've been waiting all my life for this moment, to be totally and utterly in love. Now, if that sounds slushy, I make no apology.' He felt her start to relax again under his touch and he carried on talking, trying desperately to win her around.

  'Loving you means wanting to take care of you—all of you, Alice. I don't want you to have any trouble with your blood pressure. Of course I'm concerned about you working. I want you to be at home, putting your feet up, enjoying the last few weeks of your pregnancy. Not stuck in a hot theatre and up all night on call.'

  She understood what he was saying, more than understood. As much as Alice loved her job, in the last couple of weeks that was all it had become—a job, no more than that. Something you had to do, not the labour of love it had once been. Oh, she knew her vocation would return, that she would always be, and want to be, a doctor, but for now she was a woman. A heavily pregnant woman who was tired and needed to rest and focus on the life within her. How easy it would be to lie back against him, to throw in the towel and let Jeremy make the decisions for her. But she had made a promise to her child, and she had also been let down badly before. There simply wasn't the luxury of choice here; she had to see it through. To hide the indecision she felt, her words came out harshly.

  'So the great Mr Foster will provide? Women are actually capable of making it without a man, you know.' She swung around to face him.

  'I have no doubt you're more than capable, Alice. I'm merely saying it's no longer necessary for you to work yourself into the ground—'

  'You'll take care of us.' It wasn't a question, more a sneering statement, but Jeremy wasn't about to be perturbed.

  'If you'll let me.'

  Alice paused for a moment, gathering her thoughts. She knew her words had hurt him but she needed some time to think. It was all just happening too fast.

  'I can't do that, Jeremy.' She saw a flash of pain in his eyes. 'I need us to be on equal terms. If we'd been together longer, if this were our baby...' She looked at him, perplexed. 'I'm not saying that I don't trust you, that I'm not grateful for your offer, but I've thought of nothing else but getting through my internship for over six months now. I've made plans, big plans, to move to the country, bring my baby up there... I'm not saying that I'm necessarily going to go through with them, but I need to—no, have to have that option up my sleeve. I can't just throw it all away on the strength of this weekend.'

  'Fair enough.' Jeremy took a deep breath. 'Then how about on the strength of this? Marry me, Alice.' He paused, searching her face for a reaction, and when she didn't answer he added somewhat desperately, 'Please?'

  For a second Alice couldn't quite believe what she was hearing. She knew she loved him and, despite her doubts and misgivings about men, did believe that Jeremy truly loved her, but never in a million years had she expected this. And also at the back of her mind, painfully intruding and desperately unwelcome, was a small nagging voice that warned her of Jeremy's past, his previous track record, his apparent inability to remain faithful. She needed a clear head for this, she needed absolute clarity, not the cloudy euphoria of rose-tinted glasses worn in the first giddy weeks of love. Her baby deserved that at least.

  'You'd never be asking me if I wasn't pregnant.'

  Jeremy looked at her thoughtfully. 'I hate to point this out, Alice, but it's not my baby. There's hardly a shotgun to my head, forcing me to do the honourable thing.'

  'I know,' she conceded. A small smile tugged on the corner of her lips. 'But it is the truth. Jeremy...' She took his hands and moved her face close to his. 'I'm so grateful to you for asking me, I really am, but the timing's just not right. Ask me again when I'm thin and gorgeous and the clock's not ticking. There may not be a shotgun but we are up against the clock.'

  'You're taking a raincheck, then?'

  Her smile widened at his answer. 'What would you know about rainchecks, Jeremy? I'm sure you've always been able to have absolutely anything you want, when you want it.'

  'Until now.'

  She heard the pain in his voice and she longed to comfort him, but she wasn't going to give in. Instead she put her hands up to his face and kissed him tenderly. 'Let's just say it's on hold for now. I need to do this, Jeremy, and if we really are meant to be, we'll work it out.'

  With that he had to be content.

  Driving back, this time they were on the right side of the beach road to capture the full beauty of the bay. Her hand resting on Jeremy's solid thigh, Alice leant back in the seat marvelling at the sight, marvelling too at how the weekend had unfolded. She had found love, had had a marriage proposal and with Jeremy's skilful help had unleashed a sensual side to herself that she never would have believed existed. She squeezed Jeremy's thigh, as if pinching herself to make sure it was all real.

  'What time's your appointment again?'

  'Five-thirty.'

  He glanced at the dashboard. 'We'll be there in plenty of time.'

  Alice nodded. For once she wasn't nervous about her appointment with Brett. Never had she felt more relaxed or content. Surely her blood pressure must have come down?

  As Jeremy slid the car into a parking spot a little later, Alice undid her seat belt.

  'I shouldn't be too long.'

  Jeremy nodded, 'Whatever. I'll just wait here, shall I?'

  Alice hesitated. 'It's up to you.'

  Jeremy shook his head. 'No, Alice, it's up to you.' She couldn't blame him for being cautious after her 'back off speech, but she had never intended to shut him out. The fact that Jeremy wanted to be there for her, to share in this time, sealed her love even further.

  'Come on, then,' she said softly.

  * * *

  'Dr-Masters, I've been trying to call you.' Madge, the receptionist, replaced the receiver and gave Alice an apologetic smile.
'Brett got called away to perform an emergency Caesarean section and he's also got another woman just about to deliver, so he's had to cancel his antenatal appointments for this evening.'

  It was a scenario Alice had been warned of when she had first met Brett Halliday. 'Babies come when babies come, Alice, so if I have to rush off or miss an appointment you'll have to bear with me. It will be your turn to keep a few ladies waiting one day.' Sitting there, slim, without even a trace of a bump, that day seemed a lifetime away.

  'That's no problem, Madge. Should I make an appointment for next week?'

  'No, Brett wants to see you weekly—he's written that quite clearly. I can squeeze you in at ten a.m. tomorrow, or there's a four o'clock appointment available on Wednesday.'

  Alice pointedly didn't defer to Jeremy, and she could almost feel him bristling beside her as she said, 'Four o'clock on Wednesday will be fine. I'll see you then.'

  As soon as they stepped out into the car park Jeremy turned to her. 'Why didn't you take the morning appointment?'

  'Because we've got a busy day tomorrow.'

  'We'd have coped. It's important to get yourself checked.'

  Alice stood by the car as Jeremy unlocked it. 'And I will, but on Wednesday.'

  He didn't argue the point but Alice could tell he wasn't happy. 'Look, Jeremy, if I start rushing off to antenatal appointments whenever I like, and you start treating me like a doll, people are going to start talking.'

  Jeremy shrugged nonchalantly. 'Let them talk. We've done nothing to be ashamed of.'

  'I know that, but once this gets out...' She didn't know what to say. Alice could almost hear the gossip hurtling through the wards, raising questions they hadn't even answered themselves.

  'You want to keep it quiet?'

  Alice nodded. 'At least until my internship's finished. Surely that's for the best?'

  Turning the key in the ignition, Jeremy finally nodded. 'If it makes things easier for you, that's what we'll do. But, hell, Alice, this is the one decent relationship in my life. I'm not going to act as if I'm doing something wrong.' He gave her a small smile. 'Where do you want to go?'

  And though the last thing she wanted was for this magical weekend to end, Alice had a sudden urge to be at home, amongst her own familiar things.

  'Do you mind if you take me home?'

  Jeremy's face was crestfallen and he couldn't hide the disappointment in his voice. 'Sure.'

  The journey home was tense, and suddenly Alice was filled with misgivings. What if he was regretting what had taken place? What if he was finally realising what he was letting himself in for?

  Depositing her bags on the living-room floor, Alice stood uncomfortably. 'Look, I know it's not what you're used to, but I can't explain it—I just want to be at home right now. We can stay at your place another time.'

  In an instant his attitude changed, his face lighting up as he broke into a wide smile. 'I thought I was dropping you off, that you wanted to be alone.'

  So that explained the mood! 'Hey, you're not as cool as you make out, Mr Foster.'

  'Not where you're concerned. Come here,' he said, pulling her close. 'Now that I've found you I don't ever want to spend a night apart. I'd stay in a tent if that made you happy.'

  Alice leant against him. 'I don't believe a word of it. Somehow I can't imagine you without hot running water and a marble bathroom.'

  'Well, maybe not a tent,' Jeremy conceded with a teasing note to his voice, 'but I hear they've come a hell of a long way in luxury caravans.'

  One of the nicest aspects of falling in love, Alice mused as she listened to Jeremy singing tunelessly in the shower, was the utter joy in even the simplest of things. The pleasure of discovering the tiniest details about each other—from how they liked their coffee to the more heady details of what turned each other on. For Alice their love-making was an utter revelation. She quite simply melted at the sight of Jeremy, and had an almost insatiable desire to have him near her, touching her, unlocking secrets of her body that Alice hadn't even known existed.

  Watching Jeremy walk out of the bathroom, his gorgeous masculine body ridiculous in a small pink towel, Alice let out a gurgle of laughter.

  'I'm sorry. Was that the only towel you could find? I'll have to go to the laundry tonight.'

  'No, you won't. You'll be far too busy tending to my needs to be stuck in the laundry. I'll buy some at lunchtime when I go and get a couple of shirts.'

  Alice watched guiltily as he dried the collar of his Egyptian silk shirt with her hair-dryer. Only at ten last night had they realised that his suit, tie, socks and shirt were in a crumpled mess at the bottom of his suitcase.

  Finally happy that his shirt was dry, Jeremy made his way over to the bed and took a grateful sip of the coffee Alice had made. Looking down, he saw her gazing at him, a dangerous glint in her eye. 'Uh-oh, no way, we'll be late,' he said as her hand reached up and grabbed the towel.

  'Then you'd better be quick,' Alice said seductively, pulling him back onto the bed beside her.

  It was a slightly breathless, laughing pair that eventually pulled into his reserved parking spot at the hospital. 'How am I supposed to get through the next twelve hours without touching you?' Jeremy grumbled.

  'It will make tonight all the better,' Alice promised and, reaching across, gave him a long lingering kiss. 'That will have to do for now. I'll go on in—and by the way, Mr Foster, you've been a wonderful teacher. I can hardly wait for the next lesson.'

  Walking across the car park, Alice could barely keep the grin off her face. Suddenly life felt good again, as if the gods were smiling on her.

  'What time do you call this?' Josh gave her a friendly wink a few minutes later as Alice joined him at the sink to scrub.

  'I know, I know,' Alice said, blushing. 'I missed the tram by a millisecond. Normally I'd have run for it but I'm simply not up to it.' She was saved from any further lies by the angry voice of Linda.

  'About time,' she seethed. 'And, no, I don't want to hear any excuses. You know full well what sort of day we've got ahead of us. The least you could do was get here on time.'

  Alice didn't answer. In truth she was only two minutes late, but ordinarily she would have been there at least half an hour ago. Seeing Jeremy walk through the door, not quite as immaculate as usual, Alice suppressed a smile. Linda's rancour was worth it.

  'Morning, all.' He made no apology for being late, neither was one expected.

  The team was using two theatres this morning. All the procedures were fairly minor—hernia repairs, circumcisions and the like—but it was an extremely demanding list just by the sheer volume of patients that were being operated on.

  By eight-thirty the first patient was on the table. Alice was assisting Jeremy, but once he started operating their thoughts were only for the patient.

  'Mr Jacobs, thirty-two years old, with a left inguinal hernia. Today we'll be performing a keyhole repair of the bowel wall as opposed to the traditional open repair, which will hopefully mean less risk of infection and shorter recovery time. Any questions?'

  Nobody answered and Jeremy began the procedure explaining his movements every step of the way. All eyes were on the screen that showed the work he was doing inside Mr Jacobs's body and Alice watched, fascinated, as the mesh that would hold the protruding bowel back in place was inserted. Jeremy made it all look so simple, operating the guides apparently effortlessly, but Alice knew that each movement took skill and patience, and though he made it look easy it certainly wasn't.

  On and on they worked, the day lengthening as the list grew shorter. They stopped only for a quick coffee at mid-morning and a hasty lunchbreak.

  'All right?' Jeremy asked as Alice took a bite of her egg sandwich.

  'Fine,' she lied. It had been impossibly hot in the theatre and, despite sitting down, her back was absolutely killing her.

  'How's things your end?' he asked as Linda marched in.

  'Shipshape,' she answered briskly. 'I've sent Josh up to the
ward—the workload's building up there.'

  'Good idea. Alice, why don't you head up to the wards after your lunch? Linda and I will finish off the list.'

  She didn't have to be asked twice.

  By the time the day had ended Alice was completely exhausted. So as not to draw attention to themselves, Jeremy had left straight after the final post-operative ward round, leaving Alice and Josh to carry out his last orders. By the time she wearily climbed off the tram and let herself into the bedsit all she wanted to do was sleep. Jeremy, it seemed, had beaten her to it. Long-legged, he lay stretched out on her sofa, his feet dangling over the edge.

  Alice gave him a gentle poke in the ribs. 'I thought you'd have dinner on,' she joked.

  Jeremy rolled his eyes. 'I'm too exhausted to even ring out for pizza. How about we go straight to bed?'

  This time when they climbed into bed it was far from Jeremy's passionate declarations of the morning. Instead they just about remembered to set the alarm before cuddling up and falling deeply asleep.

  'We're like an old married couple,' Jeremy said with a laugh when they woke up. 'First time an early night's meant just that. How do you feel this morning?' he asked, after planting a soft kiss on her lips.

  Alice winced as she opened her eyes. A thumping headache wasn't the best way to start a day and night on call.

  As Jeremy wandered off to make the coffee she lay there for a moment. Just three weeks or so to go. It sounded such a short time but it seemed like an eternity. If Jeremy asked her now to chuck it all in she'd be hard-pressed to refuse. Shaking her head ruefully, she headed for the shower. It was simply a question of mind over matter, she insisted to herself. She wasn't about to give in now.

  Jeremy might have got the waiting lists down a fraction but there was definitely a down side to his surgical vigour. The ward round was interminably long, not helped by the fact that Jeremy and Josh had already been summoned to Theatre to perform an urgent laparotomy on a road trauma victim. Which left Alice to do the round with Linda, whose venom seemed to have taken on a stronger bite this morning. Every patient, it seemed, needed an inordinate number of tests or changes to their drugs or IV regimes, which all fell on Alice.