Perfectly Lonely: (Let Me In, Book 2)

by Marin, Jessica

  “Hmm, I believe I need to torture you for teaching my daughter about a certain type of juice.” She squints her eyes at me while tapping her fingers against her smirk while she contemplates what route to take for our walk.

  “Every day with you is torture,” I joke, which is the furthest from the truth.

  “And yet, you keep coming back for more!” She laughs and I can’t help but join her as she’s right. “Let’s walk along the shore today for some peace and calmness.” Jenna’s bodyguard, Mason, nods his head silently at her request and walks ahead of us toward the path to Lake Michigan. Cal employed Mason to be with Jenna when he’s not around, especially since the paparazzi were aggressive with her when the story of her and Avery first came out.

  I’m about to ask why she needs peace and calmness today when I look over at her and notice for the first time the purple bags underneath her eyes before she conceals them with her sunglasses. My gaze travels down her body and the looseness of her leggings confirm my suspicions of weight loss. Since it’s not her busy season with her event planning business, the only reason for her stress would be the absence of Cal.

  “What’s going on, Jenna? You look like shit.” I was never good at sugar coating my words, nor did I ever try to be.

  “How kind of you to think so,” she remarks sarcastically. “I’m fine, just tired.”

  “Late night talks with your boyfriend will do that to you.”

  “That would be the case if I could get ahold of him.”

  “What do you mean?” I ask in alarm, hoping that this isn’t a repeat performance of what they went through before.

  “The director is trying to play catch up from delays, so they’ve been shooting scenes non-stop. I barely get to talk to him and when I do, it’s usually in the early morning hours due to the time difference. Text has been the consistent communication since he tries not to wake me because when he’s free, we are usually sleeping. But I want to hear his voice, so I tell him to call no matter what time, but sometimes he’s even too busy for that. Avery hasn’t physically talked with him in over two weeks. They communicate by sending videos to each other.”

  “Has he told you how much longer they will be filming?” I ask, partially in concern for her and selfishly for me since I need to know how much longer I get her to myself.

  “He doesn’t know,” Jenna says as she shakes her head. “They’ve been filming for three months already and are now in their last filming location, so hopefully soon.”

  Three months! I had not realized he’s been gone that long already.

  “Are you sure being tired is the only thing that is going on?” I probe, as we finally reach the start of the path to the shoreline.

  “I don’t know, Layla,” she says with a shrug. “I guess I just feel lost…I have no clue what I’m doing when it pertains to my personal life.” She sighs and picks up her walking pace.

  “Wait, what does that mean?” I ask again, feeling like a broken record with my line of questioning.

  “I have never done this type of long distance relationship before and I thought I was cut out for it, but I don’t think I am.”

  “Um, news flash, you were in a long distance relationship before or does Jax Morrow not count?” I remind her. It was only a year ago that she was dating the handsome hockey player, who spent most of his time in the minor leagues during his hockey season, which was two hours away from Chicago. He would also spend his summers in Canada with his daughter from his previous marriage. Robert and I both knew this was not a serious relationship for Jenna, as she barely acknowledged they were dating. When she did decide to become more serious about Jax, Cal showed back up in her life.

  She stops short and stares at me, her mouth hanging open in shock. “Oh my God! How could I have forgotten about Jax?” she practically screams in hysterics.

  “Jenna, is everything okay?” Mason turns back to us, his voice filled with concern at her uncharacteristic outburst.

  “Oh, she’s fine, Mason. She’s just realizing what a cold-hearted bitch she is,” I joke with laughter, but quickly stop at Mason’s questioning look.

  “I really am a bitch!” Jenna says and I know from the sound of her voice that tears are starting to well up in her eyes. I immediately grab her hands and squeeze them.

  “Jenna, you are not a cold-hearted bitch. It’s understandable that you would have forgotten about Jax,” I reassure her in hopes to make her feel better.

  “How is that understandable? I shouldn’t have forgotten about him! Jax doesn’t deserve that — nor did he deserve how I treated him,” she says and I see her take a deep swallow of guilt as she has a quick mental trip down memory lane.

  “You have a lot on your mind right now. Personally, I think we need to blame this all on Cal since he has consumed your every waking thought since his arrival.”

  “How could I have forgotten? Jax was my boyfriend. We had sex together!” She starts to walk again, her strides quick and angry.

  “Oh please!” I say with a wave of my hand. “I don’t remember most of the people I’ve slept with. So see, no big deal!”

  She looks at me incredulously. “That statement makes me sad for you.”

  “Why?” I ask. “Guys can screw whomever they want and aren’t expected to remember.”

  “Those guys are scumbags and I have higher expectations of you.”

  “Yeah well, you shouldn’t,” I huff, wanting to change the conversation away from my flaws. “This discussion is not about me — it’s about you and why you don’t think you’re cut out for a long distance relationship.”

  “You were the one who brought it up,” she counters back.

  “Well, my plan to make you feel better is backfiring on me,” I grumble as she laughs at me. “I don’t necessarily think that you can’t handle long distance relationships. I think you can’t handle the one you are having with Cal.”

  “Why would you say that?” She looks at me with confusion.

  “Besides his job taking him halfway around the world, he consumes you! He is so… so alpha!” I say with a hint of disgust. I’m not a fan of men who take control over their women’s lives and feel Jenna is on that path with Cal. “I just feel that you’re going to have to give up your life for him.”

  “In what way would I have to give up my life for him? He hasn’t asked me to give up anything yet!”

  “Yet is the keyword here! I can’t walk and have a serious conversation like this. Can we sit down for a second?” I don’t even wait for a response as I plop down on the bench we were about to pass in order to collect my thoughts and breath.

  “Mason, we’re going to take a break,” Jenna calls out to him. He gives us as much privacy as he deems acceptable, which is no privacy whatsoever in my opinion. Jenna sits down next to me and we both take a moment to collect ourselves while staring at Lake Michigan.

  “I’m going to be completely honest with you, because I love you like no one else.” I take a deep breath before continuing. “Cal is an actor, so therefore, he’s used to people catering to him and his needs. Going four weeks without seeing him is not a sustainable relationship with a man like Cal. He seems to be so intense…so needy.”

  “That’s an interesting assumption considering you’ve barely been around him,” she says, with a knowing look.

  “He just seems to always demand your attention,” I whine.

  “Layla, we’ve barely hit the year mark together! Of course he’s going to demand a lot of my attention,” she says, annoyance laced in her tone.

  “He moved in right away! How could you know if you even liked each other enough to move in together?” I was in complete shock when she told me two weeks after they started dating again that he had moved in. What pissed me off even more was that I was alone in my sentiments as her parents and Robert were one hundred percent supportive of the idea.

  “Why should we start slow? We already have a child together. If anything, we need to make up for lost time. And Cal doe
sn’t move slow. When he wants something, he goes all in.”

  “You don’t even know his quirks. What if he’s a slob? What if in his down time he plays video games all day long? Have you watched how he chews his food yet? Does he smack his lips together while he chews so you can see all his food in his mouth like this?” I smack my lips together, poking my tongue out as if I’m chewing invisible food openly.

  She stares at me with a look of astonishment on her face. “What the hell is wrong with you right now? Are you really concerned about my relationship or is this about you being worried he is going to take me away from you?”

  “Both!” I yell, loud enough for Mason to look back at us.

  Jenna sighs and takes her sunglasses off to rub at her eyes. She looks exhausted and I suddenly feel guilty for my outburst. I should have kept my mouth shut, but when it comes to Jenna, I can never keep my opinions to myself. She’s my sister from another mister and I would take a bullet for her — that is how deep my love for her is.

  “My relationship with Cal has not started out normal or easy, and if it was any other person, I might have not given them another chance. But Cal is different. This relationship is different. My feelings for him are completely different from what my feelings for my ex-husband were. It’s a different kind of love. My love for Cal is so intense that sometimes the thought of losing him hurts like no other pain I thought I had experienced.” She places her hand over her heart as if just speaking those words are causing her pain. “I don’t expect you to understand, but I do expect you to respect my decisions and my relationship.”

  “I do respect your decisions and I’m trying to respect your new relationship, but I don’t want to see you lose yourself into a man. And how can you say you don’t expect me to understand? I buried the love of my life!”

  “I’m not saying you don’t understand loving someone, Layla,” she say sternly. “What I’m trying to say is that you can have different types of love with different people. You can’t compare your love for Charlie versus my love for Cal. Love is love and comes in many different forms and styles.” She sighs and takes my hand. “I need you to trust that I know what I’m doing with my heart. I appreciate your love and thank you for sharing your concerns with me. I just ask that you give him a chance. I really want this to work with him and I’m realizing that with his profession, I too am going to have to make some sacrifices.”

  I’m about to interrupt her, to tell her that is exactly what I’m worried about when she holds up her hand for me to stop and looks at me intensely. “The sacrifices I have to make, Layla, might take Avery and I away to be with him while he is on location. But in no way shape or form would I ever sacrifice our friendship - our sisterhood - for a man.”

  I squeeze her hand and swallow the lump that has formed in my throat. I know I should never have doubts about our relationship. I should be confident that we will always be best friends. But I have seen men come into women’s lives and change the dynamic of their relationships with their friends and I can’t help but be concerned it might happen to us. When Jenna was dating her ex-husband, I felt like I was dating him too, because I got to spend time with him as well. I have barely spent time with Cal and a lot of that has to do with both of our schedules. When he’s in town, I’m usually traveling, and vice versa. He deserves for me to give him a chance as he does make my best friend very happy.

  “I’m sorry, Jenna, I just can’t help but feel I’m going to lose you,” I say, my voice cracking from the emotions that I am trying to hold back.

  She pulls me into her and hugs me as tight as she can. Jenna always hugs the people she loves tightly, so I can feel her trying to wrap her arms around me even tighter than her usual hugs. “You are not, nor will you ever, lose me, Layla!”

  We stay like this for a little longer and finally pull away, both of us dabbing at the tears falling from our eyes.

  “I know you’re afraid of me losing myself, but I’m more afraid for you. You have been doing so great these past four weeks and I’m scared that with Cal coming back, you’ll lose your way. Please promise me that you’re going to stay strong and keep working on yourself, mentally and physically?” She grips both of my hands and squeezes, forcing me to look at her.

  “I promise I will try, Jenna. I will try to stay strong. And, I will try to give Cal a chance.” She smiles confidently at me and I silently pray that I don’t let her down.

  “Good! Now, can we please continue on with our walk?”

  “Only if we can grab a donut on the way back. I need some carbs and sugar to soothe over my emotional state, as that was way too adultish of a talk at this time of the morning.”

  “Absolutely!” she says, surprising me with her agreement. We laugh, grab each other’s hands and start swinging our arms together as we walk, exactly how we used to do as kids.

  And in this moment, everything seems like it will be okay.

  4

  Chase

  Click, click, click.

  The sound of the camera’s shutter clicks loud and furiously as I take photos of the two women leaving the donut shop. I halt taking photos and review the shots I got of the petite brunette and her blonde friend. My focus is on the brunette, Jenna Pruitt, the girlfriend of mega star, Cal Harrington, and the mother of his child. Photos of her are still commanding a pretty penny despite the hype of their scandal dying down.

  A scandal that was revealed by me.

  I sigh and slowly start to follow them, reminiscing about that day. I didn’t really care back then about the consequences of what taking photographs of celebrities could do to them. I didn’t give a shit if it would hurt them or their loved ones. I needed money and I needed it quickly, which is the only reason why I got into the paparazzi business. All I cared about was how many zeros those photographs would bring to my bank account. Some celebrities and their photos vary with the amount of money they bring in. What really makes the money is if you have a shred of evidence of a story that could be reportable. A story that gained interest and traction to become world-wide news. I was on the hunt for that next big story. A scandal that was so big that I could command close to six figures. Fate delivered that scandal right to me in the curvaceous and beautiful package that is Layla Sands, the best friend of Jenna Pruitt.

  It was just last year that I was at a famous nightclub in Las Vegas to photograph another sponsor endorsed party for the latest B-list celebrity. These parties in Las Vegas are a dime a dozen. They are my least favorite events to cover as I feel I’m only supporting the already inflated egos of narcissistic celebrities who shouldn’t be paid to attend their own birthday party. Photographing them was a quick and easy way to make money, so when I had the time and was desperate for cash, I would attend these parties. The company that Layla works for are major players at sponsoring these type of VIP events. Despite their reputation as always putting on excessive parties to keep their vendors and celebrity guests satisfied, I had never attended their parties before. I arrived at start time to scope out the club before it got crowded, knowing that these parties always tended to start later than advertised. I was taking some shots of the club to check out the best lighting when I noticed Layla. A blind man would have felt her presence, but if he could see her, he would have seen the face of an angel and heard the voice of a sultry, seductive siren. She unconsciously commands your attention with the confidence that radiates from her. I was intrigued when I saw her, but quickly became enthralled when I heard her magical laughter.

  I was determined to meet her.

  I did my job sparingly that night, my intentions on meeting Layla becoming my sole focus. She was hard to get to at first, with the manager of the club sticking close to her. I placed myself in her line of vision, waiting for her to scan the crowd. I knew she would notice me because I’m a good looking guy. Not trying to be cocky about it, but years of women throwing themselves at you and telling you how hot you are will indubiously convince you so. As soon as I caught hold of those blue eyes, I
gave her my best smile and saluted her with my drink. I wasn’t prepared for the sexy smile she gave me in return, nor could I hide my body’s reaction when she raked her smoldering eyes over me from head to toe, her return gaze showing crystal clear that she liked what she saw.

  I felt like the prey about to be devoured, except I wanted to be devoured.

  Devoured by her.

  I liked her boldness. It was refreshing for once to see a woman showing she was interested instead of playing games and being coy. As soon as I saw my opening, I swooped in and introduced myself to her. It was loud in the club, so we had to be in close proximity in order to hear each other talk. Despite her luscious breasts on full display in her low cut dress, my eyes were drawn to her mouth. Full, succulent, pink lips that were the perfect lips to be kissed. Her breath was a combination of her cinnamon gum and alcohol and I was ready for a tall drink of her. Her smell was intoxicating and it took all my willpower to not claim her lips as I was dying to know if she tasted as good as she smelled.

  I wanted this woman and I was going to make damn sure I had her tonight.

  We started off with the usual bullshit small talk. I told her I was a photographer, commissioned to be here tonight to take photos of the famous guest of honor. Lots of women become impressed when you start mentioning that your line of work included celebrities, so I started rattling off the current major stars, implying that I have photographed them. Some of it was true — most of it was lies. As soon as I said Cal Harrington, whom I’ve never had the pleasure of meeting, her whole demeanor changed. She looked at me with disgust and asked if I was friends with him.

  Right then and there, I knew there was a story.

  After I reassured her I was not friends with him or any of the celebrities I photographed, I started to devise a plan to find out what about Cal Harrington brought out her disdain. Most women would have been begging to know what he was like, but her reaction completely caught me off guard and made me suspicious. I changed the topic of conversation and started pumping her with drinks. She greedily accepted and as the night went on, she loosened up. I snuck in my questions like switching gears when driving a stick shift and her answers started to slowly place the pieces of the puzzle: