Redemption (Enigma Black Trilogy Book #3)
Page 4
I sunk down to the floor, cradling my throbbing knuckles, the tears falling freely down my face. Blood ran down my arm and dripped onto the floor and the broken glass that had fallen down from the sink. Through my tears, I eyed the jagged shards thoughtfully and picked one of them up. Ironically, the one I had chosen was shaped like a sword with a narrower portion that jutted out like a blade, and a thicker, handle-like section at the bottom that didn’t appear as ominous as the thinner portion.
With my glass sword in one hand, I turned over my other hand to reveal my wrist. Bright blue veins ran down the length of my forearm before jutting off in different directions, creating a virtual fork in the road right where my wrist turned into my hand. I touched the glass to my arm, lightly brushing it along the path of the larger, more pronounced vein. All it would take was one long, deep cut to make the pain I felt go away. Just one cut to leave The Epicenter behind and reunite with my family again. Just one.
I screamed, throwing the glass against the wall, which shattered my sword into several less dangerous pieces. Death was not an option right now, not yet. The easy way out was not up for consideration. More determined now than ever, I stood up, ripped the leads away from my body, causing myself further pain and discomfort, and threw them in the trash can next to the toilet. With my bleeding hand, I then turned the knob on the bathtub and started the shower, determined to wash away all my dark thoughts.
A revolution was on the horizon, and I would be its catalyst or I would die trying.
Chapter Five
Confusion
I stepped out of the shower, dripping wet and shivering because I hadn’t thought to grab a towel. On the floor where I’d last left it, my robe lay unfolded. With my foot, I threw it up in the air and caught it with my hand, quickly donning it to warm up. In one of the bathroom drawers, I found some bandages packaged in plastic. I ripped the package open with my throbbing hand and unraveled the bandage, wrapping the material around my knuckles and securing it with adhesive. Cautiously tiptoeing around the glass on the floor, I then made my way out of the bathroom.
“Are you seriously trying to give me a heart attack?” Kara’s unexpected voice startled me, causing me to jump. She sat on my bed, her eyes stern and fixated on me in a cold stare.
“What are you talking about?”
“You took your leads off, didn’t you?”
“Yeah. So?”
“So? You know we monitor your vitals through them, right? And by monitor your vitals, I mean all the time. Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. Removing your leads made it appear as though you had flat-lined. And given the events of the past week, that wasn’t an illogical conclusion for me to have come to when the alarms started going off in my room. Celaine, I thought we had lost you.” Though she was trying to project anger, a slight waver in her voice revealed both relief and exhaustion.
“I didn’t mean to upset you, Kara.” Taking a seat next to her on the bed, I put my arm around her.
“You owe Drew an apology,” she said, her voice softening. “Poor kid got an earful from me for falling asleep on the job.” She grabbed my bandaged hand and inspected it. “What happened here?”
“I got angry and the mirror got in the way of my fist.”
“Oh, Celaine,” she sighed. “Being your friend is emotionally draining some days.” She unwrapped my hand and examined the damage. “At least the wound doesn’t need stitches. How did the mirror fare?”
“Not so well,” I said, laughing a little. “She doesn’t look so cocky anymore.” Out of the corner of my eyes, I could see the hint of a smile playing at the corner of Kara’s lips. “How did you get in my room, anyway?”
“Being a medical provider, I have codes to both your and Ian’s rooms to use in case of an emergency, or when you two do something stupid.”
“Where is Ian? Did he hear the alarm too?”
“No, I sent lover boy to his room to get some rest. He hardly slept the entire week, and has been at your side the whole time. I don’t know what happened between you two at that hotel, but he’s—”
“Oh, don’t act so innocent,” I laughed. “Your notes and the items I found packed in my bags suggest you know otherwise.”
“They were mere suggestions, I didn’t make you kiss him,” she said with a sly smile.
“And that’s all that happened, just so you know.”
“Really? One kiss, and you guys are in love.”
“What are you talking about? What is this love deal? First Ian tells me he loves me in the recovery room, now you’re implying that things are a lot more serious than they are.”
“Celaine, you told him you loved him in the car when he was rushing you back here. Hell, he wouldn’t shut up about it while you were unconscious. You would think no one has ever told him they love him before.”
“I don’t remember ever saying that at all. I—” And then it struck me, my going in and out of consciousness, Ian carrying me through the streets, the car ride back to The Epicenter, the field with the tree, and Chase. “Oh, no.”
“You said it to him, didn’t you?” Kara asked. I nodded, resting my head in my hands. “But it wasn’t Ian you were saying it to, was it?” she pressed on.
I shook my head slowly. “No.”
“Was it Chase?”
“Yes,” I answered. “It was the strangest thing. I was conscious yet unconscious at the same time. Everything seemed so real. The field with the flowers; the wind on my face; my brother; and Chase’s arms around me.”
“You were hallucinating from the blood loss,” Kara said matter-of-factly. “Hallucinations are pretty powerful.”
“What have I done? How am I going to tell Ian?”
“You’re not going to tell him anything.”
“Kara, I can’t lie to him. Besides, if he keeps telling me he loves me, eventually he’s going to expect me to answer him back.”
“How do you feel about him?” Kara asked after a moment had passed.
“I’m confused, to say the least. I care about him. Actually, I care more about him than I ever anticipated caring about anyone again. Love, though, that’s a leap I’m not sure I can make.”
“Then I suggest stalling until you know what you can and cannot commit to with him. Maybe you’ll discover that leap isn’t as far as you think.”
I nodded, smiling at Kara, the consummate hopeless romantic.
“But let me just make one suggestion to you,” she said, eyeing the locket around my neck and resting her hand on mine. “Take it off; it’s been weighing you down long enough. Not to mention, the look Ian gets on his face every time it catches his eye, like he’s been punched in the gut, or—”
“Like his heart is breaking,” I interrupted her.
“Something like that.”
“Ms. Stevens,” Victor’s voice heralded his appearance, as the door to my room slid open. He walked into the room with Cameron in tow. “I understand you’ve caused quite the commotion already this morning.”
“You know me,” I answered him tersely. “I’m not happy unless I’m stirring the pot somehow.”
“Indeed. Since you’re feeling better, I suggest you suit up and ready yourself. You have quite the public announcement to make this morning.”
“And what if I refuse?”
“Oh, Ms. Stevens, let me suggest to you that you put the proverbial spoon down and step away from the pot, because you really won’t like the bad taste your insubordination is going to leave in your mouth.”
*****
“Is the swelling ever going to go down?” Paige asked, rubbing the knot on Chase’s scalp. “It’s been two days and it doesn’t look any less swollen.”
“Don’t worry, Paige, it will go down before the wedding,” Chase said, putting the icepack back on his head.
“That’s not what I’m worried about, silly. I just assumed it would look a lot better by now.”
“Trust me, the swelling has gone down from what it was. Wounds usually look
worse before they get better. I’m just happy my headache has finally subsided.”
“How could they do this to you, a doctor, no less?”
“To me? They shouldn’t be able to do this to anyone, but they do, and they justify it as keeping us law-abiding citizens safe.”
“Yeah, I’m sure you looked real safe, being carried away unconscious on a stretcher,” she said, resting her head on his shoulder. “At least they caught the rebel terrorist they were looking for and your suffering wasn’t for nothing. I’m curious, though, what you were doing in that hallway when Trey was in getting his measurements taken?”
Chase could feel his face beginning to flush, his mind searching to find an acceptable explanation. “I thought I saw someone I knew. A former patient,” he lied.
“A former patient? Wow, that person must have made one heck of an impact on you.”
“You could say that.”
Paige picked up the remote control from the arm of the couch and switched on the television. A news broadcast appeared showing footage of the latest rebels caught and detained by soldiers. “I hear their leader, the man who arranged the assassination attempt at the address, is still at large,” Paige commented, studying the broadcast intently. “What was his name? Marshall?”
“Marshall Leitner,” Chase answered, closing his eyes. “He’s one of the very few who managed to escape from the park.”
“It’s just amazing how many ordinary citizens were involved in the plot against Brooks, and there are most likely many, many more. Our mailman, neighbors, former teachers—”
“Or even us, Paige. Do you really think every one of those people is guilty? And besides, since when is free speech or public demonstrations illegal?”
“They’re conspiring against the leader of our country, and they nearly killed him. I think he’s justified in his actions.”
“Brooks is declaring war on those who are voicing their opinions against him. That’s not a justifiable offense warranting imprisonment. They’re making him look bad and are removing the wool from the eyes of the people in the process. Trust me, Paige, this is one area where you and I are just going to have to agree to disagree and leave it at that.”
“Okay, then,” she muttered. “Oh, look, that superhero who saved you is going to be giving a statement this morning.”
“What?” Chase opened his eyes and turned his head to look at the television.
“It looks like she survived after all. But since you’re not interested in any of this, I’ll turn it off.”
“No,” Chase said, putting his hand on hers. “That’s definitely something on television worth seeing.”
Chapter Six
The Message
I pulled my boot on as I sat at the foot of my bed. In less than fifteen minutes, I was due in the training center to deliver a speech written by Victor as though it were my own. It would most likely be a speech riddled with deceit and empty promises like the ones Brooks always gave. My stomach swirled, and I could feel the bile rising up my esophagus, though not from nerves. No, nerves played no part in the way I felt. Fury, plain and simple anger, was making me sick, mainly because I knew there was little, if anything, I could do about my situation. Sure, I could go against Victor and refuse to do the speech, but then what? Both he and Brooks would surely find some other way to parade me in front of the public or, worse, force Ian into it.
Ian. Kara’s advice resonated in my mind. She was right, I had been letting the impossible dream, the ghost of the relationship Chase and I had once shared, drag me down into depths I couldn’t resurface from. It was morbid, in a way, and was single-handedly preventing me from acknowledging what was potentially in front of me.
Before I could fully the grasp the importance of what I was doing, my fingers unclasped the locket and removed it from my neck. Bittersweet, but long overdue, I allowed the fragile chain and delicate locket to rest in my hand, their weight increasing exponentially with each second that passed. When the weight became too much to bear, I set the necklace down next to me on the bed and vowed to ensure its return to Chase and his family somehow.
I let out a sigh as I stood up, grabbed my helmet from the chair next to my bed, and left my room to head to the training center, hoping I could figure out a way to turn things around in my favor.
“Hey,” Ian greeted me outside my door.
“Here to escort me to all the fun?”
“You know I always have your back.” He walked next to me, close enough that his arm brushed against mine with practically every other step. “Ian, I—” I paused. Should I take Kara’s advice and work out my feelings before saying anything to Ian that could potentially break him, or be honest with him, leaving the door open in the future?
“What is it, Celaine?” he asked. We went through the first set of doors, bringing us steps closer to the training center.
“I just realized that I never really thanked you for saving my life.” You win, Kara.
“You honestly think you need to thank me for that?” Ian laughed. “Especially right now?”
“Of course I do. If you hadn’t acted as fast as you did, and in exactly the same way as you did, I wouldn’t be alive to make any statement to the public right now.”
“I did exactly what I know you would have done for me,” he replied. “Now please promise me you won’t bring up almost dying again. It was bad enough I had to live through it, I don’t need to be reminded how close I came to losing you.”
“You have my word. I won’t bring up my near death again.” We paused at the entrance to the training center and faced each other. “This whole thing is making me physically ill.”
“I know,” Ian said. “I’m not happy about it either. It’s just another lie we’re being asked to deliver.”
“How much of this has been a lie, do you suppose? What if it all has? Ian, what if The Epicenter, or even we ourselves are lies?”
“Well, that’s a lot to think about, for sure.” He wrapped his arms around my shoulders, an act I found comforting. Ian had a real knack when it came to comfort. “How about we just get through this speech, statement, or whatever this turns out to be, and then we’ll tackle everything else? Whatever answers there are to be found, we’ll find them.”
I nodded, trying to think of another way to stall from going into the room. “For some reason, I have a feeling we’re not going to like what we find out.” My helmet hung from my waist. Sighing, I unclipped it from my utility belt and secured it over my head. Then, glancing back at Ian, I walked through the final set of double doors that separated us from the training center.
Inside, the training center had been transformed into somewhat of a makeshift newsroom. A large green screen concealed gym equipment and floor mats. What images would be projected behind me, I didn’t know, and most likely that was an answer I really didn’t want to know. In front of the green screen, a camera stood mounted, complete with teleprompter. From the body of the camera, a cord ran haphazardly across the floor, eventually connecting to a laptop. In front of that laptop, Cameron sat engrossed in whatever program he had open on his screen.
“It figures Victor would have his shadow overseeing everything,” I said sardonically.
“Aw, I missed you too, Celaine,” Cameron replied without looking up from the keyboard. “Tell you what, after you’re done addressing the nation, you and I will blow this place and play catch-up together.”
“As tempting as that offer sounds,” I rolled my eyes as I answered him, “I think I’m going to have to respectfully decline. Besides, I wouldn’t want to take you away from your usual afternoon activities, seeing as how you’re being charged a dollar ninety-nine per minute.”
“That’s okay. I always knew I was too much man for you to handle anyway.”
Ian rolled his eyes, joining me where I stood next to the camera. “It all seems so simple,” I said quietly. “One lone camera in an empty room; a confirmation to the public that their very own superhero is still alive
. Yet I know it’s anything but simple. One word, one phrase, one misguided declaration could cause irreparable harm to so many innocent people.”
“Good morning,” Victor said behind us.
“Maybe it is for you,” I said without turning around to acknowledge him.
“Now, now, you truly are making a mountain out of a mole hill. All I’m asking for is just a few minutes of your time, and then you can go back to your life.”
“What life is that exactly, Victor? One where I’m made to carry out orders that go against everything I believe in?”
“Choices, Ms. Stevens. You had the choice, and this is the life you chose.”
“Did I? Did I really have a choice? Because the way I understand it, if I hadn’t chosen to come here, I would have been shot.”
“What?” Ian asked incredulously.
“And during the length of our program, we’ve only had to dispose of two people in that manner,” Victor answered coldly. “Just two out of the eleven people we approached declined our offer, and had to be prevented from talking. Overall, I would say those are pretty good odds, making us all but certain that anyone we confronted would be agreeable to joining us and our cause, including you.”
“The mere fact that you think the deaths of two people constituted good overall odds tells me everything about your character I ever needed to know.”
“And the fact that you can’t see why those deaths were crucial in the long run speaks volumes to your naiveté. Death is only a tragedy if one cannot find a way to benefit from it. Now, Ms. Stevens, I have a tight schedule today, and I think we can both agree that neither one of us wants to be in this room any longer than necessary.”
Disgusted, I stepped in view of the camera, situating myself in front of the green screen. As though sensing my presence, the camera came to life. A green light glowed brightly on its side panel, and the screen of the teleprompter came into view. Off to the side, I noticed Cameron working at his laptop and surmised that he was controlling the camera through the cord that connected it to the machine.