She nodded, trying to swallow what had the potential of becoming drool. “Right. Because. People are coming over.”
He put down the salad bowl. “Meh. I never really was one for people,” he said with a glint in his eye. He crossed the space between them in a heartbeat and then she was in his arms.
His warm hands framed her face, and she felt the calluses that she was now accustomed to on this new version of Jack. She looked up, and he lowered his head and gave her the longest, sweetest kiss, which turned into a kiss that made her knees wobble as his hands left her face to roam down her body. He lifted her onto the counter, not taking his mouth off hers.
“Why is Aunt Lily sitting on the counter?”
They both froze at the sound of Maggie’s voice in the kitchen.
“Yeah. Why is Lily on the counter, Jack?” Chase called out, the amusement in his voice ringing clearly.
“I’m going to kill him,” Jack said under his breath.
Lily smiled sheepishly and waved at Chase, Julia, and little Maggie. Jack helped her off the counter.
“Well, Lily needed help reaching some of the plates, so I helped her.”
“But all the plates are on the table, Jack,” Chase said with a lazy grin.
Julia poked her husband in the ribs. Jack still didn’t turn around, and Lily studied his face, taking in the clenched jaw. It hit her then—no one had seen him without his beard. Julia…she’d been married to his twin. She squeezed his hand, and he gave her a quick kiss and then turned around to face their first dinner guests.
...
Jack made eye contact with his sister-in-law from across the room, watching as the color drained from her face and the smile fell. “Jack,” she whispered.
The silence in the room was killing him. Lily’s hands squeezed his and it felt damn good to have her on his side again, in his heart again.
Julia’s pretty green eyes filled with tears, but seconds later her smile was back and she crossed the room and threw her arms around him. He hugged her back, feeling the trembling in her body.
Julia pulled back and smiled up at him, the tears gone. “This. I love this. It tells me you’re back for good,” she whispered. The women in his family had always been strong, had always found the words to voice what was right, what they felt. In so many ways they were stronger than the men.
“Personally, I liked the beard,” Chase called out, thankfully breaking a moment he found way too emotional.
“Not me,” Maggie said. “I like this. Beards can get full of gross food if you’re not careful when you’re eating.”
They all laughed. He had no idea how his friend had managed to get such an adorable daughter. “You’re right, Maggie. It was becoming too much work.”
“Hello!” His father’s voice boomed from the hallway and his gut clenched. The rest of his family arrived. His conversation with his mother the other night ran through his mind. Lily still stood beside him, taking his hand. He looked down at her, a lump in his throat as he put his arm around her. His parents and sister stood in the doorway, Gwen’s gasp the loudest of all of them. He searched their eyes for pain, for disappointment, for sadness. His gut was wound so tight he couldn’t even inhale to breathe. But there was no sadness. There were tears. Lots of moppy, soppy tears as Gwen and his mother charged him like bulls, but there was no sadness, no disappointment.
An hour later they were all seated around the large table in the kitchen. The food was spread out and they were about to dig in when his mother clinked her glass and stood. The look on her face was fierce. He should have known nothing would be easy. He was holding Lily’s hand on his lap and felt her give it a squeeze.
“Before we start eating, I’d like to take a moment and lead this family in prayer.”
He resisted the urge to groan. He respected his mother and her faith, so he kept his mouth shut even though he didn’t really feel like praying.
“Now, if we could all join hands.”
He was already holding hands with Lily, but Chase was on the other side of him. They frowned at each other.
His mother made a tsking noise, and Lily and Julia nudged the both of them.
“Don’t be afraid of holding hands,” little Maggie said. “You’re best friends. Best friends always hold hands.”
Everyone at the table laughed, and he reluctantly held out his hand. Chase reached for it in some kind of grip they could both feel somewhat okay about.
“Children, are you finished?”
They both gave his mother a sheepish nod. Seemingly satisfied, she gave them a stern look before bowing her head. “Lord, thank you for bringing us here together as a family today. Thank you for reuniting these most precious people. Thank you for bringing our beloved Jack home. To stay. Forever. Right here where he belongs. Amen.”
Jack swallowed down the lump that had formed in his throat and locked gazes with his mother across the table.
He raised his glass to his mother and smiled.
His sister stood up. “Oh, um, actually while we’re praying I think it’s a good time to put in a plug for our grand opening next week.”
“You’re not taking out ad space with God,” Jack said, trying not to laugh. His sister ignored him.
“So I’d like us all to pray for profit.”
“Gwen!” his mother admonished.
“While we’re at it, can we pray that Jack and I can stop holding hands soon?” Chase asked.
Jack leaned over and kissed Lily, who was laughing.
“You can’t kiss in front of God, Uncle Jack,” Maggie called out.
“Maggie, honey, it’s not wrong,” Julia said gently.
“Very wrong, Maggie. When you’re much, much older and after your engaged and Daddy has run a series of background checks on your future husband, and maybe had him followed for a few weeks, then you may kiss him…but only after a series of tests and…”
He let go of Chase’s hand and continued to kiss Lily, letting their voices drown out. He couldn’t believe he’d ever walked away from her, from all of them.
“God, I missed your family,” Lily said against his lips.
He was home.
Chapter Eleven
“We are so not ready for tonight!” Gwen yelled as she burst through the kitchen doors and into the store, carrying a large tray of truffles.
Lily tried to be the voice of reason, but it was hard. Between her own nerves about how tonight would go, her crazy hormones, and the fact that she and Jack were now something again, she wasn’t exactly feeling calm. She lit votive candles on the tables.
“Gwen, we have no choice. In half an hour this place will hopefully be packed. Whether we’re ready or not.”
She took in the space, satisfied with how it looked. The little red votive holders now twinkled with candlelight. Silver trays with their most stunning truffles sat atop the front counter. Coffee was brewing. Gift bags were lined up on the back table. All they really needed to do was open the door.
“Gwen, we did it,” Lily said.
Gwen paused. Her friend looked gorgeous in a red dress that was a stunning contrast to her dark hair and eyes. “Can I drink the amaretto that we use for the truffles with liquor?”
Lily laughed. “You’re being dramatic. Everything will be fine.”
“Wasn’t my brother supposed to be here by now?”
Lily quickly averted her gaze and toyed with the white coffee mugs that were sitting beside the stainless steel carafes of coffee. “I’m sure he’ll be here as soon as he can.”
“You two seem to be getting along lately.”
That was one way of putting it. They’d been inseparable, actually. It was like they had just fallen back to like they used to be, except for the part that she was still withholding. She still hadn’t told about the baby they’d lost. Maybe it was that she still didn’t trust him completely. She wanted to. Badly. She wanted to put the past in the past, but she was scared. She was so terrified that he would leave her again, that sh
e’d be on her own with a man she knew she could never get over. “Well, I guess I’m trying.”
Gwen gasped and raced across the store to stand in front of her. “Really? You know that night of the snowstorm I totally faked being sick so I could send Jack over here, right?”
Lily burst out laughing. “I actually had no idea you were faking.”
Gwen sighed and threw her hand over her heart. “Poor Jack didn’t, either. All I said was that I abandoned you at the shop and he went running.”
Lily sighed and crossed her arms. “Gwen.”
“And were you responsible for the beard shaving?”
Lily covered her face and nodded while Gwen squealed.
“I knew it! I bet my dad twenty bucks!”
“That’s awful,” she said, laughing “Your family is here,” Lily said, looking over Gwen’s shoulder. The entire Bailey clan was standing there, with Jack front and center. The plan was that after the grand opening they were going to go back to the Baileys’ house for an intimate congrats party for the girls.
Gwen raced over to unlock the door. The sea of Baileys was then followed by Chase, Julia, and Maggie, and pretty soon the entire place was packed. The four temporary servers they’d hired for the night were moving constantly while she and Gwen mingled and made some great contacts.
As the evening wore on, Lily’s feet were aching to the point where she thought she’d never be able to wear heels again. She was having indigestion and now she was even having an ache in her abdomen. She’d been pushing too hard. After this grand opening she was going to take a much needed rest. She’d sleep in and do the afternoon shift.
Jack walked over to her, a frown across his forehead. “Want to call it a night, babe?”
Lily nodded. “Thankfully, it looks like people are already starting to leave.” Most of the gift bags were gone and the crowd was thinning out.
“Why don’t I drive us to my parents place and then I can drive you back into town tonight when you’re ready to go home?”
She nodded and remembered what it had felt like to have Jack by her side. It was nice to have someone to rely on. Someone who made her feel safe and cherished. “Okay, let’s give it another half hour. I don’t want to leave without your sister.”
“Done. And congratulations, you guys did it,” he said, smiling down at her. He looked so handsome tonight. Sometimes she found herself just staring at him, loving the sight of him, of his face.
“We couldn’t have done it without you,” she whispered.
…
Jack brushed some snow off the back step of his parents’ deck and sat down, taking a deep breath of cold air. He needed a minute to breathe without someone staring at his face.
When his family had seen him without his beard, their reaction had been humbling…and uncomfortable. But it was the right step and he knew that. He was reclaiming his life here, with these people, with Lily. He was also being the man Lily needed.
The grand opening of the Shadow Creek Chocolatiers had been a huge success and he was happy for his little sister and Lily. He turned his head at the sound of the patio door opening and shutting. Julia stepped out. She crossed her arms and shivered. “You had to come sit outside. You couldn’t find a quiet spot in the house?”
He smiled and brushed some snow off the step beside him. He’d always liked Julia, and she’d fit in with the family right from day one. But after the accident, he’d had a hard time making eye contact with her. Her pain had been gut-wrenching to witness and had made him feel guiltier than he already was.
“I needed some fresh air,” he said when she sat down beside him.
“Well, that’s understandable. Lily and Gwen looked happy tonight.”
He nodded slowly. “Yeah. They deserve it.”
“I’m glad the two of you seem to be finding your way back to each other.”
He was, too. He sensed the change in Lily but knew he still had work to do to earn her trust, to be the family they always wanted. He looked up at the sky. It was filled with stars. There was no night sky like in Montana—it was like a blanket filled with diamonds. “Are you happy, Jules?”
He looked down at his former sister-in-law after she didn’t answer right away, taking in the sheen in her pretty eyes, knowing, before she even answered, how happy she was. She didn’t say anything, and he could tell she was struggling. When her chin wobbled, he put his arm around her and she rested her head against his shoulder.
“I miss my family every day, Jack. I…there is a part of me that will always belong to my baby; it will always be empty, impossible to fill, and I know that now, I can accept that. But I can still love, deeply. I love the little family I have, and I had no idea that would ever be possible for me. I didn’t even want it. I pushed everyone away for so long. But when I came back this Christmas…”
“Chase can be persistent,” he said with a short laugh.
“They both can,” she said, a smile in her voice. He knew she was also referring to Chase’s daughter, Maggie.
“You know he loved you since he first met you, right?”
She sighed. “Yes.” There was hesitation in her voice and she slowly pulled back to look at him. “I love Chase…in a way that I didn’t know existed.”
Her eyes were filled with something that he didn’t quite understand. He didn’t know whether or not he should ask her about that statement. It almost implied that she loved Chase more than his brother. Her marriage to Michael wasn’t his business.
“Michael loved you very much, Jack. And so did Matthew. You were the best Uncle Tack,” she whispered, her eyes still filled with tears.
He took a deep breath and decided to tell her what he’d been holding onto for five years.
“Michael and Matthew weren’t supposed to die that night,” he said, looking down.
She squeezed his hand. “I know, it wasn’t fair.”
He shook his head. “No, you don’t understand. I was supposed to take Matthew to the movies.”
She frowned. “No you weren’t. I was working late that night, and Michael told me that he was going to take Matthew to the movies.”
Jack ran his hands through his hair. “Michael called me just before dinner and said something came up, but he didn’t want to disappoint Matthew, so would I mind taking him. I said yes, but that afternoon I was asked to do another shift at work, so I told him I couldn’t.”
“Oh Jack,” she whispered. She rested her head on his shoulder and reached for her hand. “You can’t put that on yourself.”
His gut churned at the memory. “I never take that route that Michael does. If I had driven Matthew—”
“Stop it,” she said, squeezing his hand. “You can’t look back. You can’t change the past. It’s done.”
He ducked his head. “If I had driven him, you would have still had a son and a husband.”
There was a long pause. “You don’t think I played this game, too? What if I hadn’t worked late that night? What if I had driven Matthew? What if, what if? All I know is that we know nothing, and even though we think we are in control of our lives, the reality is that we have so little control. Our lives all changed in a second that night and none of us saw it coming, so we can either sit in fear or sit in the past, or we can just accept it and have faith.”
He rubbed the back of his neck. “Have faith in what, Jules?”
“In life. In your purpose. In Lily. Have faith in yourself, that you’ll fix this. I want you to fix this. I want you to come out on the other side, like I did. I know it’s possible. And I can tell you, with all my heart, that I never thought I’d be able to wake up and not want to die. I was so close to the edge, Jack,” she said, tears slipping from her eyes, making his own eyes swell with emotion. “I’m back. A different version of me, but I’m here and I can tell you, it was all worth it. I’ve been blessed in new ways, ways I’d never imagined for myself.”
He didn’t say anything. Faith. Again with this word. He didn’t want to argue or
belittle her feelings.
She punched his shoulder lightly. “You didn’t listen to a word of what I said, did you?”
He rubbed the back of his neck. “I did, I did. I’ll think about it.”
She punched him again. “What’s the alternative? Blame yourself for the rest of your life, never be happy again?”
“No.”
“Yes.”
“I’m happy you’ve moved on. I’m happy you’re with Chase.”
She smiled now, a bright, happy smile. “He’s a good guy. The best.”
It was an odd kind of statement, considering.
Her smile dipped slightly. “I know you and Michael were close. There were things I discovered after he died that changed everything for me.”
His stomach dropped. “Like what things?”
She didn’t say anything for a long moment, just held his stare. He could read her eyes and knew she was holding onto something big.
“Jules.”
“Nothing.” Her faced seemed to close up for a moment, then she gave him what looked like a forced smile. “Nothing. Just things about myself. I guess what I want to say is that you’re here now, and maybe you’re a different version of yourself, but that’s okay. You are still what Lily needs. Don’t ever doubt that.”
…
Lily laughed as Maggie gave her a thumbs-up sign from across the kitchen. They were all standing in Jack’s parents’ house after the grand opening of their chocolaterie.
The day had been crazy exhausting but a success. The townspeople had flooded their store and they couldn’t keep up with coffee pouring and sales. She had to hand it to Gwen, the tables had been packed all day—clearly the idea of serving coffee and baked goods had been dead on.
The entire Bailey clan was here and Jack was by her side, holding her hand. He’d been by her side all day, all week. If she closed her eyes she could pretend this was the perfect moment, surrounded by family, a precious baby in her womb, and Jack, the love of her life, beside her. Because the honest, scariest truth was that he was the love of her life. She had dated other men in an attempt to get over him, but no one made her feel the way he did. The entire week had been crazy busy with work at the shop and then…Jack. He’d slept at her place all week, had helped her through morning sickness, and then had gone to work at the ranch after dropping her off at the shop.
The Baby Bombshell (Shadow Creek, Montana) Page 11
