Seen by Candlelight

by Anne Mather

  Karen bit her lip. What was he leading up to?

  “Yes, Lewis,” she murmured in reply. “I think so.”

  “You think so,” he echoed. “What do you mean by that remark?” His eyes narrowed and Karen wished she had not said just those words. Truthfully, she would like to have cleared up the business of Lewis informing Paul that they were lovers, for there must be an explanation for that, but she decided that this was not the time nor the place. It was too delicate a matter. “Don’t read anything into my remarks, Lewis,” she said. “It was a completely innocent statement.”

  Lewis hesitated a moment and then nodded and rose to his feet. He had lit a cigarette and drew hard on it.

  “I’m very glad you came, Karen,” he said.

  “Well … shall we get on, then?” she asked a little nervously.

  Lewis ran a hand through his hair again. “All in good time, Karen,” he said. “I really wanted to talk to you, you know. I get so little chance these days. You’re always so busy.”

  Karen frowned. “Hardly that, Lewis. I’ve been helping to keep Sandra from breaking her heart over Simon Frazer, if that’s what you mean. I’m sorry if you think I’ve been neglecting my work.”

  “You mentioned work, I didn’t,” he murmured with a cold smile. “We used to be such close associates, Karen. Lately you haven’t seemed to want to see me at all. You rarely come in to the office.”

  Karen shrugged and felt herself going red.

  “That’s not true, Lewis,” she protested. “We were never very close. You always knew we would never be more than friends.”

  “Friends? Ah, yes, friends. And is Paul Frazer a friend of yours now?” Lewis’s eyes glittered strangely.

  “Paul and I? Well, that’s our affair, surely?” she replied, resenting his manner and yet somehow afraid to openly antagonize him in this mood.

  “You’ve been seeing a lot of him lately,” said Lewis in a monotone.

  “And I’ve just told you why,” she exclaimed hastily.

  Lewis frowned. “And I suppose you now know he’s broken his engagement to Ruth Delaney?”

  There it was at last. Paul was free. It was true! Really true! She tried to contain her excitement, but it must have shown in her face for he looked piercingly at her, his eyes burning.

  “No,” she said at last, “I didn’t know that. How did you find out?”

  “I had lunch with Ruth today.”

  Karen was astounded. “You had lunch with Ruth? But Ruth doesn’t know you.”

  “No, I agree. Before today we were strangers, but she rang me up because she knows how I feel about you and consequently she thought we might be able to help each other. You see, she still wants Paul Frazer just as much as I want you.”

  Karen blinked her eyes rapidly. This conversation was fast becoming too personal. Was this what she had been unconsciously afraid of? Lewis’s growing obsession with herself and the showdown which had been inevitable? He was obviously strung up and the passionate absorption which he had always shown for his work all seemed to have been turned on her.

  “Lewis!” she exclaimed. “You know that whatever happens I couldn’t marry you.”

  “I disagree.” His face was grim. “Until Frazer came back into your life you were drifting into a relationship with me that would have eventually led to marriage.”

  “No!” The word was torn from her. “I couldn’t marry you, Lewis. Ever. I think I ought to tell you now. I’m resigning from the company. We can’t go on in this way any longer.”

  “I agree,” he muttered, his voice harsh. “That’s why I asked you here this evening. But don’t think you can just cast me aside like an old shoe. I’ve done everything for you, Karen, found you a home, employed you, most of all loved you …”

  Karen felt awful. His degeneration shocked her, arousing her pity.

  “Oh, Lewis!” she exclaimed. “I’m so sorry. Truly I am, but we were never meant to be married, you and I. You’re not like me and I’m sure I’m not your type.”

  Lewis was going red in the face and she cried anxiously:

  “Are you all right?”

  “All right?” he echoed angrily. “How can I feel all right when I watch you ruining your life for a second time?”

  Karen frowned. “I’m not ruining my life, Lewis.”

  “You’re considering going back to Frazer, aren’t you?” he sneered bitterly. “I thought you had more self-respect, Karen! Can’t you see he’s only leading you on to spurn you, once again?”

  “Then why has he broken his engagement to Ruth?” she exclaimed, aware that Lewis’s words still had the power to disturb her.

  Lewis shrugged. “How should I know? Maybe he tired of her, too.”

  Karen bent her head. There was still an element of logic in Lewis’s words. Why should she imagine that Paul’s interest in her was any more than a physical attraction? Hadn’t he himself said almost the same thing that day at Trevayne?

  She looked up. “Whatever I decide to do, Lewis, it’s no concern of yours,” she said clearly. “And I won’t change my mind so far as you are concerned! It’s no good, Lewis. You’re too old for me!”

  Lewis’s face contorted at her words. “I wasn’t too old for you when it came to citing me as co-respondent in your divorce suit!” he said violently. “You used me, Karen, and you can’t deny it!”

  Karen shook her head unhappily. “Oh, Lewis, you wouldn’t let me fight the case. You know we were innocent. You know we could have proved it.”

  “How, answer me that!”

  Karen got unsteadily to her feet. “No, you answer me something,” she retorted, gathering confidence from indignation. “How was it that a witness should certify that we spent that particular night in the flat together? It was only one night, so why were we found out?”

  Lewis bent his head, avoiding her eyes. “Obviously Paul was already seeking a divorce. He had detectives –”

  “Well, how jolly convenient!” cried Karen hotly, “that’s all I can say. If I didn’t know you better, I’d half-believe you planned the whole thing!”

  “Karen!” He was staring at her with horrified eyes. “How can you insinuate such a thing? I – who have always had your well-being at heart.”

  “Well, maybe I can do without your help,” she said, fingering a heavy paperweight that was lying at her side of the desk.

  “Can’t you see,” he exclaimed, shaking his head, “that I only want to support you and can care for you, be the person you can turn to in times of trouble?” He came round the desk to her side. “Karen, be reasonable! You know I’m the only person who loves you to distraction.”

  Karen stepped away from him. “I really think I ought to be going, Lewis,” she said uncomfortably. “Obviously, you’re in no mood to talk about work, and I’m in no mood for anything else.”

  Lewis halted, his eyes glittering with his anger. “Don’t despise me so much, Karen,” he muttered. “One day you may wish you’d listened to me!”

  “Are you threatening me, Lewis?”

  “No, not threatening, Karen, only advising. Paul Frazer!” His voice grated over the words. “That man has been the bane of my life!”

  Karen looked at him squarely. “You must know, Lewis, that I love Paul. I always have and I guess I always will. Oh, for a time you convinced me I was being foolish, and I began to think I was fooling myself, but it’s no good, I see that now. I’m sorry if I’ve hurt you, Lewis, but there’s nothing I can do.”

  Lewis caught her shoulders when she would have moved away, and thrust his face close to hers. “Once before Frazer thought you were my mistress,” he said harshly. “But either he’s accepted that it was a fleeting thing on your part or else you’ve told him the truth and he’s chosen to believe you. I wonder what his reaction would be, however, if he found that you were my mistress – now.”

  Karen stared at him incredulously. “What do you mean?” she asked breathlessly, hardly daring to consider what he was suggesting.


  Lewis’s eyebrows raised. “Surely you know what I mean,” he taunted her. “This office building is deserted, and we’re alone. What’s to prevent me from making love to you? Or should I say who?”

  Karen was horrified. “You’re crazy!” she exclaimed, glancing towards the door involuntarily, wondering if he was really serious.

  Lewis shrugged. “Am I? Why do you say that? You’re a beautiful woman, Karen, the only woman I’ve ever really loved. Why should you imagine I would hesitate to take every chance to make you mine – to rid myself of annoying competition? Because of a surety, Frazer wouldn’t want you after I had regaled him with the details of your surrender!”

  “Oh, you’re vile – evil!” she exclaimed, shaking her head from side to side. “Lewis, stop talking like this! We’ve been friends. Don’t destroy everything between us!”

  She struggled to free herself, and as her fingers brushed the desk they encountered the solid mass of the paperweight. Her fingers closed over it, and then relaxed again. What did she intend to do with it? Hit him over the head? Oh, that would be too melodramatic! These things just didn’t happen any more. Lewis would come to his senses. He was surely trying to frighten her, that was all. Even so, she didn’t care for his humour.

  Lewis released her suddenly, and she almost fell, clutching the chair weakly to support herself. “Thank goodness,” she murmured weakly, and then she realized he was closing the door and turning the key firmly in the lock. “Lewis!” she exclaimed incredulously, but he seemed indifferent to her pleas.

  She lifted the paperweight again, and considered hurling at him. But to do so to stop him would require more strength than she possessed and instead she turned and hurled it through the window behind her. There was the hideous sound of crashing glass and then silence.

  Lewis was flabbergasted for a moment. “You destructive little fool!” he snarled angrily. “Have you any idea of the cost of a window like that?”

  Karen glared at him, trying to hide the fear that was rapidly overtaking her. “You talk to me about destruction!” she cried indignantly. “Haven’t you destroyed plenty of things in your time? My marriage, for example.”

  “You believe that of me?” he cried tormentedly.

  Suddenly there was a knocking at the outer door of the office, and Lewis turned frowningly, while Karen felt a surge of relief.

  “Martin!” came a familiar voice. “Open this door! I want to speak to you!”

  Karen’s eyes widened. “Oh, Paul!” she called, in disbelief. “Paul, I’m here!”

  The knocking increased, and with resignation Lewis unlocked the door and admitted the other man. Paul’s eyes flew from Karen to Lewis and then back to Karen again.

  “Are you all right?” he asked, his eyes blazing angrily.

  Karen nodded silently, and wrapped her coat closely about her.

  “Yes, yes, I’m fine,” she said at last, trying to stop her lips from trembling.

  Lewis walked to his desk and then turned to face them. Paul studied the older man’s face savagely. “If you’d harmed her I think I would have killed you,” he bit out violently.

  Lewis pale face was flushed. “I never touched her,” he denied, coldly. “Now – or ever!”

  Paul glanced at Karen, and she swallowed hard. “You – you locked the door,” she whispered.

  Lewis sneered. “Only to frighten you. I’ve never raped a woman yet, and I don’t intend to start now,” he snap-pad harshly. “Take your little woman, Frazer, and get out of here. I never want to see either of you again.”

  “Wait outside, Karen,” said Paul quietly, and Karen hesitated only a moment before doing as she was told.

  She walked along to the lift, and waited impatiently, shivering a little. There were few sounds from the office and she wondered what Paul was saying to him. Then there was a noise like a crack, and a thump, and a few minutes later Paul joined her, putting on his gloves.

  She looked questioningly at him and he smiled wryly. “I’ve just done something I’ve wanted to do for a very long time,” he remarked. “Now, shall we go back to the apartment?”

  Karen nodded.

  The warmth of the apartment had never seemed more welcoming. A table had been laid for two in the alcove and Karen smiled.

  “Oh, Paul,” she murmured, “you don’t know how good it is to be here with you!”

  Paul’s fingers tightened on her hand, and she went on: “After – after – well, all that excitement, do you think I could take a shower? I feel all hot and sticky.”

  Paul smiled. “Okay. You know where it is. I’ll get Travers to delay dinner for a few minutes.”

  “All right.”

  “You’ll find a robe hanging on the bathroom door,” added Paul suddenly. “That is, if you need it.”

  Karen gave him a questioning glance, and then turned away. Did he mean what she thought he meant? Or was Lewis right? He wanted an affair!

  Leaving him, she went through the bedroom to the bathroom and stripping off her clothes she stepped under the shower. She allowed the water to cascade over her aching body, loving the cleansing feeling it gave her. It was as though she was washing all traces of Lewis from her mind as well as her body.

  Her hair was soaking when she had finished, so she rubbed it thoroughly with the thick bath towel, and after drying herself she put on the white bathrobe she found on the door.

  Then she crossed to the mirror and combed her hair into smoothness again. It was still damp and clung against her neck. After slipping her feet into a pair of bath mules she walked back to the lounge.

  Paul had removed his jacket and was stretched out on a couch, smoking a cigarette, his head resting against a cushion. He rose abruptly as her entrance and said:

  “Sit down. I’ll get you a drink.”

  “Thank you.” Karen subsided on to the couch and he crossed to the cocktail cabinet and poured her a whisky, adding only a little soda. He handed her the drink and then she said: “Sit down, Paul. There’s something I would like to know. How did you come to be at the office at the crucial moment?”

  Paul shrugged his shoulders but remained standing. “I had a telephone call from Ruth when I got back to my apartment earlier in the evening. It was about the time when you were going to meet Martin. She had met him for lunch today and she had realized he was in one hell of a state. To begin with, she had played along with him because she hoped he might be able to persuade you to marry him, and thus distract my attention from you once and for all.”

  Karen shivered in anticipation. “Your attention?” she questioned. “Paul, are you serious?”

  Paul loosened his collar. He looked down at her with passionate eyes and then with a muffled exclamation he pulled her up into his arms.

  “The drink …” she began, as his mouth sought the softness of her neck.

  “To hell with the drink,” he muttered harshly, and his mouth parted hers passionately. Then his fingers caressed her shoulders, pushing the gown aside and seeking the warmth of her throat. “Karen,” he groaned, “I adore you. I never stopped loving you, you believe that, don’t you? However much I tried to convince you otherwise. You must marry me again!”

  Karen pushed him slightly away from her. “Darling,” she breathed, “finish what you were saying about Ruth. I want to know.”

  Paul sighed. “Well, selfish and spoilt as Ruth undoubtedly is, she’s not a fool, and Lewis’s manner was so strange she eventually decided she’d better call me and let me know that he had said he intended having things out with you tonight. I was worried, so I decided to come to the offices to meet you. When I arrived and heard glass breaking I dashed up to the top floor. When Lewis opened the door and I saw you standing there looking so shocked and pale, I really could have killed him!”

  Karen sighed. “Oh, Paul, I can’t help but feel sorry for him.”

  “Why?” Paul was relentless. “He did his best to ruin our lives.”

  “I know. But honestly, Paul, surely yo
u must have doubted that I could have an affair with someone like him?”

  Paul frowned. “Maybe I did. But you don’t know the whole truth of that affair, I fear. Martin came to see me before the divorce. He told me you and he were lovers and that you wanted a divorce but didn’t wish to see me yourself. I had to believe him. He was so adamant, and I had no reason to doubt his word at that time. After all, you made no attempt to see me at all, after the separation …”

  “Lewis told me it would be better not to,” she explained, sighing now.

  “Yes … well … I told him I would need definite proof and he agreed to supply it. He gave me details of a night he would be spending at your flat, and I hired a private detective to make everything official. The detective reported that Martin had indeed stayed at your flat all night and I had to believe him. I was furious, and according to Martin there had been other nights. That was the beginning …”

  Karen swallowed hard. It was hurtful to think of Lewis deliberately ruining their marriage like that. Heartlessly, only thinking of himself.

  “He stayed at the flat because he said it was too late to go home after we’d finished working. He said he would sleep on the couch and I agreed it would save him having to go all the way to Hampstead. Paul, that’s the truth.”

  Paul smiled and drew her close. “Oh, I believe you,” he said softly. “I can see now how easy it is to be deceived.”

  “Thank goodness,” she whispered. “I never wanted to stay away, you know. If you’d only let me know you wanted me I would have come running.”

  “And now?”

  “That’s up to you,” she whispered. “Can you bear to have me back?”

  Paul’s mouth caressed her neck. “I can’t bear to let you go,” he muttered. “Does that answer your question?”

  “Oh, yes,” she breathed.

  “Are you hungry?” he asked gently.

  “Only for you,” she replied, sliding her arms round his neck. “You aren’t going to send me home, are you? Until we can get a licence?”

  “Now what do you think?” he murmured, lifting her bodily into his arms.