Darkness Betrayed (Torn)

by Christine Hughes

  The man standing out there looked in my imprisoned direction and smiled, eyes gleaming red. Heat flushed to my face and lust tightened my belly.

  “Come.” He beckoned me to reunite with who I’d become.

  Unbeknownst to the others, I began to step toward him. When I reached where they stood, he grabbed my shaky hand. I felt a wall break down as my two selves converged to become whole once again.

  I gripped the hand that held mine; the transition back was painful. Physical pain had never been a part of the separation or subsequent reunion until that moment. Damien continued to put me back together. His touch was my only comfort and I held on for dear life.

  He spoke to the others. “Get this young man inside. He needs time to heal. Then leave us.”

  At first, no one moved, obviously surprised and concerned that the devil was giving them orders to take care of Lucas, the traitor. “Please, help him,” I whispered, looking away quickly.

  Malena and Cal helped Lucas into the house; the others followed them. Only Ethan remained, questions filling his face.

  Samantha?

  Please go.

  You need me.

  You can’t help me.

  But…

  No. Just go.

  I, once again, began to feed off of his pain as confused thoughts plagued him. He turned to enter the house, looked over his shoulder and dropped his shoulders, defeated.

  “Samantha,” Damien whispered. “You need to rest.”

  My head swam with embarrassment at my inability to rein myself in. I took comfort in the fact that he, not Ethan, was here to console me.

  Holding both my hands in his, he dropped his forehead to mine. “Do you now see why you need my help? Do you now see why we can only defeat Sebastian together?”

  I nodded in resignation, unable to formulate any coherent words.

  “Come, let’s get you to bed.”

  I allowed him to lead me to my room. He took up the spot normally reserved for Ethan. I was jumpy and shaken, unable to fall asleep quickly until Damien reached out and took my hand in his and freed me from my angst.

  Chapter 11

  I woke the next morning still clutching his hand. I was warm and content for the first few minutes of the day until I remembered the incident from last night. I bolted upright, pulling my hand from his, clutching my throat. Memories of the evil that had filled constricted my airways. I struggled to breathe, gasping. Damien placed his hands on my neck. As quickly as the panic had risen and spread through me, it was extinguished by his touch.

  “It’s okay, Samantha. We’ll work together.”

  Large, black tears fell from my eyes and stained my blanket. “I can’t do that again. I was hurting my friends. I can’t do that!” Did I really still consider Lucas a friend?

  “Shhh. I know.” He moved to my bed and pulled me into a hug as he stroked my back, my hair; calming me as I then knew only he could.

  “Please help me.” My voice was small. I cringed at the weakness that plagued me.

  “I will. I will help all of you. It seems they have much invested in you. When we’re done and ready to face Sebastian, you won’t have to separate yourself to reach the darkness. I will teach you to tether the light so you can easily come back.”

  “They don’t trust you.”

  His hand stopped stroking my hair for a moment. “They will. Trust me.”

  “What are we going to do about Lucas?”

  “I’ll take care of him.”

  My imagination ran away with me at his words.

  “You get up and dressed. I will meet you downstairs. We’ll get started today. Sebastian will know Lucas is here. Whether or not he sent him has yet to be determined. Either way, he’s ready to face you.”

  He lifted his hand and my iPod started to play a comforting playlist of songs I’d compiled for times of stress. I smiled and closed my eyes when I felt his lips on mine.

  “I will always take care of you, Samantha.”

  His loaded promise blanketed me in doubt and anticipation.

  ***

  My skin felt raw after I’d showered and scrubbed the shadows off of me. Looking in the mirror, as I brushed my hair, I contemplated the pendant hanging from my neck. It still hadn’t worked the way I was told. It didn’t bring me light. All it ever did was increase the amount of negative energy that swirled around me. For a moment I grasped it in my hand and thought about taking it off, if only for a little while.

  Instead, I moved closer to the mirror until my nose touched the cool glass and stared into my black eyes. My breath fogged my reflection and I saw a distorted view of myself. Could I have changed that much, already? No trace of blue was left; all that remained was the color of raven’s wings. I blinked a few times, willing myself to change back. But each time I opened them, burning coals stared back. Sebastian had shown me eyes like mine, like they were cut from the same hard, cold, black stone. But he could change his back to that of a tranquil green meadow. How sad that all I could think about was the color of my eyes and the wish that they’d return to blue.

  I stepped back from the mirror and turned. Head over my shoulder, I spread open my wings and contemplated them in the glass. They were beautiful and took up the entire space. Silver and black moved and shimmered with each subtle movement. Even on the outside, light and dark were vying for control. I reached my hand over my shoulder and felt where they connected to my body.

  The dull ache that had accompanied the arrival of my wings had long since evaporated. Now they were as much a part of me as my elbows and knees. I plucked a small feather and held it up to the sunlight that streamed through the window, completely lost in thought.

  Samanthaaa...

  I steeled myself at his words as my spine straightened.

  You have something I want.

  No.

  Lucas has been a very, very bad boy. Return him to me.

  I shook my head and pivoted, looking for him.

  Join me. I know about your little plan.

  I closed my eyes to erase his connection but when I opened them, he was staring back at me through the mirror with a wicked smile on his face, those green eyes of memory fading to black.

  I can give you everything.

  He was just as beautiful as I’d remembered. His skin was just the right color of warm caramel. The line of his jaw angled just so. The color of his lips held just the right amount of red. I reached and grazed my fingers on the mirror and he did the same. I frowned. He frowned. I touched my own face. He touched his. Backing up from the mirror I reached for my hairbrush and saw him reach for something, too. The brush flew towards his reflection. His laughter echoed over the sound of breaking glass.

  ***

  I tore down the stairs to find the lot of them sitting quietly, attentive to Damien’s commanding presence in the middle of the room. Surveying the room quickly, I saw Mara eating an apple and Ethan leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. Even Cal and Noah were entranced by the words of the devil. Malena, on the other hand, looked bored, picking at her freshly polished fingernails. A smile tugged at my mouth. She really doesn’t give a shit. The only two missing were Branna and Christian, until I remembered Lucas. Where’s Lucas?

  My encounter with Sebastian became lost as I took it all in. “Ahem.” I cleared my throat to get their attention.

  “Ahh. Here she is.” Damien walked over and put his arm around my shoulder like I was some celebrity guest. “As I was saying, we need to do everything we can, put all our differences aside to defeat Sebastian. I know where he keeps the box and we will retrieve it. But you can no longer doubt Samantha and her abilities if I am to help you. She will have control. I will make sure of it.”

  They all nodded in agreement and I was surprised at how docile they all were. Not one word in protest, not one word to the contrary. It was like they were all motivated by the sound of his voice. Much like I was motivated by his mere presence. Like little lambs following their shepherd. My hands opened
and closed into fists and my nerves were screaming. I couldn’t escape the clutches of my anxiety.

  “Samantha, do you have anything to add?” Eager eyes turned to me, all sense of distrust from the night before vanished.

  “LucasranfromSebastian.” I winced as my declaration came out as all one word.

  “How do you know?” Mara’s quiet voice penetrated through the room.

  “Sebastian told me.”

  Damien’s smile didn’t quite reach his eyes and his voice was tight. “He was here?”

  “Kind of. He was in the mirror.”

  “In the what? What?” Noah’s face betrayed his disbelief.

  “I was brushing my hair, looking at my eyes and I heard him. Then when I looked again, his face reflected back to me.”

  “Checking yourself out, were you?”

  “Shut up, Malena!”

  “Fine. What do you mean when you say Sebastian was in the mirror?” Her voice lilted just a shade, more concerned than bored.

  “What part wasn’t clear? I know you have nails to polish and sarcasm to spew but I’m not sure what part of that you didn’t understand.”

  “Relax. I was clarifying.”

  Looking from Malena to me with thinly veiled annoyance, Damien grabbed my hand, turned on his heel and led me toward the kitchen. At the table were Branna, Christian and a roughed up Lucas.

  Dried blood was caked on his face. His wings, which seemed to be growing back, were small and broken. I hated him.

  “How did you escape?” Damien began.

  “I don’t really know. I was in some sort of room shackled to the floor. I woke up and the shackles were gone. I don’t remember much.” His gaze landed on a napkin he was tearing to shreds. Thoughts of me shackled to the floor just before I met Damien swirled into nothing.

  “Why did you come here? I thought you had pledged your screwy sense of allegiance to him and the Exiled?” My voice quivered in anger and he shook.

  Damien laid his hand on my arm to quell the storm as he continued the line of questioning. “You didn’t find that odd? That it was so easy to get away from him?”

  “I did. But my only thought was to get back here. It was all I could focus on. I couldn’t remember, not totally, why I’d left in the first place. I still don’t entirely know.”

  “Liar!” Damien held me back as I lunged at Lucas with my full strength.

  Lucas recoiled from me. “I wish I was lying, Sam. I don’t know what happened, at least not all of it.”

  “You don’t remember selling out my dad and helping Sebastian find him? You don’t remember him killing my dad when he found him? Killing Jesse? You don’t remember how you betrayed me, our friendship, your brother, the Faithful because you’d chosen to follow him?”

  “Samantha, I think you should leave. Branna, please take her for a walk. She needs to calm down.” Damien’s voice was dangerously even.

  I yanked my arm from his grip. “Fuck you!”

  I flinched as demonic eyes surveyed me and his face twisted, once again, to show the devil below the surface. “You’d do well to listen to what I say. Go. Now.”

  Branna led me out of the room, a trail of electric hate following us.

  “Come on, Samantha. Let’s go for a walk.”

  “I don’t want to go for a walk.”

  “Of course you don’t. But you can’t be here. Not like this. Let the others figure out what Lucas’ deal is.”

  The farther from Lucas I got, the calmer I felt. “Fine. I want to run. Alone.”

  She looked like she was going to say something in protest but I interrupted her before she could get out the words. “I’ll be okay. I’ll bring my sword. If I’m not back in an hour, you can send the cavalry. I just need to be alone.”

  Before she could challenge me, I ran up the stairs, threw on a sweatshirt and sneakers, grabbed my iPod and headed out the door.

  I took off at an unreasonable pace, challenging myself from the first stride. Turning up the music, I was tempted to go for angry but settled on heavy beats and fast music. My breath fogged in the crisp fall New England air and my footfalls crunched on the fallen leaves.

  When I finally settled my stride, I was vaguely aware of my surroundings. The path was worn and scenic but I didn’t stop to enjoy the view. I just ran and ran and ran; clearing my head of everything – trying to get back to that girl I was not so long ago: the girl who was content to have fun, who shied away from confrontation. The girl who existed before her best friend betrayed her and her secret crush kissed her. Before her father died and Sebastian tried to kill her. Before Damien.

  His name jolted me and, tripping on a root, I tumbled into a small pile of leaves. Instead of getting up, I rolled to my back and just lay there trying to catch my breath. I focused on emptying everything out of my head. And it was bliss, watching my breath fog above me, removing the messiest parts of my life, even if only for a little while. I stared up at the towering trees that blocked out most of the rising sun and contemplated change. Again.

  I was sick of the indecisive whine of who I’d become. The fact that I couldn’t make a decision, that I couldn’t control myself made me ill. I didn’t want to end up a stereotypical lead in one of those cheesy, my-life-sucks-everyone-hates-me YA novels. I needed to demonstrate strength. I needed to demonstrate leadership. The kid gloves everyone wore around me needed to come off and be burned. Light and dark needed to coexist inside me if I was ever going to be of any use, if I was ever going to do what was expected of me. It wasn’t enough to think it or to say it – I needed to do it. If every other part of my training came so easy, why wasn’t I able to master that? God, it was frustrating.

  My playlist switched to calm and I allowed serenity to alleviate any misgivings and doubt about what I could and could not do. As I began to drift, light and dark swirled around me.

  “Samantha.”

  A winged girl with a beautiful gossamer dress floated in front of me, bathing me in light and warmth.

  “Samantha. You are losing your way.” Her soft words floated to me.

  “I’m trying.”

  “No. No you aren’t. We need you.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You aren’t trying hard enough. You are allowing emotion to dictate your actions. You’ll never be able to make the decision if you continue on this path.”

  “It’s so hard.” I looked to my hands, wringing them until they tangled.

  “It isn’t meant to be easy. It’s a path of difficult choices and events. You will be betrayed before you will succeed. ”

  I cocked my head to the side. “You said that before.”

  “And it needs to be said again and again until you understand.”

  “But Lucas betrayed me.”

  “It isn’t Lucas’ betrayal that will define you.”

  “So you’re saying someone else will turn against me?”

  “It must be this way.”

  “Who?”

  “You must trust wisely. The sacrifices others have made and will make in your name must not be forgotten. They must not be taken lightly.”

  She began to fade.

  “Wait! Who are you talking about?”

  “I have to go. We will be watching you, helping you when you need it.”

  “Who are you?”

  “All will be revealed when the time comes. For now, please try harder. Think more clearly. Weigh your options and actions. Make the right decision. That is all we ask.”

  “Damn it! I thought I made a decision! I fought Sebastian. I decided to fight against him.”

  “Sebastian is only the beginning of your journey.”

  With that she disappeared from my sight, leaving me anxious and confused. I wanted to throw my hands up in the air and play puppet. Just let others lead me to the right choices. A part of me didn’t think I was capable of leading anything but another told me to face it all head on.

  Sebastian. He couldn’t be trusted. He mind-screwed Lucas
into betraying my family and me.

  Lucas. How could I trust someone who was so easily swayed? But I am swayed by darkness, too.

  Ethan. He worked so hard to keep me safe. Would it be enough?

  Malena. Despite myself, I trusted her – even if I didn’t like her.

  Christian, Mara, Branna, Noah and Cal, they were uneasy but thus far but they’d proven loyal even if they didn’t always verbalize it.

  Damien. Damien. Damien. Damien. His name swam in my head. I wasn’t sure what to think of him. Did I trust him? I couldn’t answer that. And the fact that I couldn’t did nothing to ease my confusion about him. Of all of them, he was the one most likely to turn against me. Damien.

  “Penny for your thoughts?”

  I was yanked out of my reverie by the sound of his voice. Speak of the devil. I tried not to smile as I sat up and scooted back against a tree, taking him in.

  “I don’t know if I can trust you.” That wasn’t exactly how I wanted to start but since the words were free, I figured I’d just go with it.

  He seemed to consider this as my words challenged his intentions. “That’s a fair point. I mean, I did take you away from your friends, shackled you to the floor, and showed up just in time to save you from killing your friend. I can see why trust isn’t a descriptor when you contemplate your feelings regarding me.”

  I couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic. “You kissed me.”

  “Ahhh. I see.” He lowered himself in front of me. A slow smile curved on his perfect lips. He sat, cross-legged, his knees touching mine. The proximity of him - his touch, his smell – clouded my thoughts for a second. “Is that what this is about? The fact that I kissed you? Or the fact that you kissed me back?”

  “That’s not fair.”

  “What’s not fair?” His eyes told me he knew exactly what I was talking about.

  “I try to talk to you, really talk to you, about something serious - about trust. And you touch me. You stand close to me. You whisper in my ear. How am I supposed to remain focused if your mere presence flusters me?”