A Cozy Little Christmas

by Laylah Roberts

  “Whoop! You go, girl!” Marcus crowed.

  Her eyes widened as she put her hand over her mouth. “Cullen, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I didn’t mean it. I wouldn’t really…I just…I lost my temper.” Would he change his mind about her now? She glanced down at her lap, ashamed.

  “Hey, look at me.”

  She shook her head. She couldn’t.

  He grabbed her chin, raising her face. “I am not your ex, baby. I don’t expect perfection. I don’t want you to tell me what you think I want to hear. Remember? I want to know what you need.”

  “What if I disappoint you? Make you mad?” she whispered.

  “I would never harm you or make you feel small. And the only way you’d ever disappoint me is if you said you didn’t want me. Do you, Ivy? Can you be with a controlling, grouchy man who hates Christmas? Could you want someone like me?”

  “Want you? Of course I want you.”

  “Thank god.” Leaning in, he kissed her. It started off light but quickly deepened. She felt her insides warm up, fire licking her as her clit throbbed. He ran his hands up and down her thighs.

  Oh Lord.

  Someone clearing their throat had her drawing back in shock.

  “Sorry, thought I’d better remind you I was here.”

  Yikes. Just as well he had. Cullen gave her a knowing look.

  “I mean, I could go find somewhere else to sleep, give you both some privacy.”

  “You’re not going anywhere.” Cullen glared at him. She liked how he took care of Marcus.

  “We all need some sleep.” Cullen stood.

  “Are the gnomes okay?” Marcus asked.

  “Oh god, the gnomes!” How could she have forgotten about them?

  “About the gnomes,” Cullen said, standing to grab the bag. When he opened it, he gave her a sad look. “I’m so sorry, baby. I got them all, I think. But a couple were banged up.”

  Oh no! She tried not to react as he drew them out. First were Mr. Grumpy Face, Gnomes so Much, Jingles and Gnomes Better. They were wet but undamaged. Then Twinkles. He was a bit damaged, but nothing that she couldn’t deal with. Then came Jinxies. He was more damaged, with one of his arms missing.

  “Jinxies!” she said with a cry.

  “I’m afraid that’s not the worst of it. Bart is all in pieces,” Cullen told her.

  Her heart shattered. This was all her fault. She should have taken better care of them.

  “Maybe we can glue him back together,” Marcus said as she reached into the bag and drew out a piece of Bart.

  “No,” she whispered. “He’s ruined.”

  “I’ll buy you more gnomes,” Cullen said with a hint of desperation.

  She gave them both a small smile. “That’s sweet of you both to offer. But it’s okay, really. He’s gone. There’s no replacing him. Like I said, they were like family. But they weren’t worth risking your safety, Cullen. I’m sorry I had you go out there and get them. I feel ashamed of myself for letting you do that.”

  “There’s no reason to be ashamed. I volunteered to go get them. I’m sorry I didn’t think to bring them in earlier.” He was frowning.

  “They weren’t your responsibility. And it’s silly, right? They’re just gnomes. Can we…can we go to sleep now? I’m really tired.”

  She caught the two of them sharing a look, but was too exhausted to decipher what they were silently saying.

  “Of course we can, baby,” Cullen told her. He removed the throw from her feet and helped her into bed, tucking her in.

  “Cullen?”

  “Yeah?”

  “There, um, you really shouldn’t be sleeping on the floor,” she blurted out.

  “I’m fine.”

  “But, you, um, you could sleep in the bed with me.”

  “I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

  “Sure, of course, sorry. I could sleep on the floor.” She couldn’t look at him. She was so embarrassed. She’d thought he might want to sleep with her. What an idiot she was.

  “Cullen,” Marcus warned. Why did he sound so upset with his cousin? It wasn’t Cullen’s fault if he didn’t want to sleep with her.

  “I know. I’ll solve it. You’re not sleeping on the floor, Ivy,” he told her as she attempted to get out of bed. He placed his hand on her shoulder. “Stay in bed.”

  “Okay,” she whispered.

  Cullen stared down at Ivy with frustration. She’d curled up, as though protecting herself.

  Fuck!

  He’d made the wrong fucking move, and now she thought he was rejecting her. Taking off his pants and sweater, he quickly used the bathroom.

  Screw it.

  He had enough control to sleep next to her and not do anything she wasn’t ready for. He wasn’t some sort of fucking animal to be driven by his baser instincts. Plus, he’d inadvertently hurt her and he needed to make it better.

  Marcus was already on the pull-out sofa and he could hear his soft snoring. They really needed some privacy. Tomorrow. He’d talk more to her tomorrow. There was so much he needed to know. About her. About her arthritis. Her Little.

  He hoped like fuck he knew what to do. How to look after her.

  You can do this. There has never been anything you couldn’t do when you put your mind to it.

  Drawing back the covers, he climbed into bed behind her. Ivy let out a small gasp and rolled over to face him. “What are you doing?”

  “Getting into bed with you. Roll back over.”

  “But…but…you don’t want to sleep in the same bed with me.”

  “Oh, I want to be in the same bed with you. It’s just that sleeping isn’t on my mind.”

  “Cullen! Marcus is just there.”

  He drew her close until her head rested on his chest, his arm holding her close. “I know. Which is why we won’t be doing anything. But tomorrow, he goes to Little school and I get you all to myself.”

  “I have a job,” she whispered.

  “You’re taking the day off.”

  “Cullen,” she said in a low voice.

  He sighed. “Too bossy?”

  “Yeah. Too bossy.”

  Damn it. This job of hers was getting in the way. He didn’t get why she insisted on keeping it. All right, that was a lie. He was a person who always stuck by his commitments as well. But once it was over, he’d be talking to her about what she really wanted to do. That asshole Davis had made her quit college, then hadn’t gone through on his promise to help her graduate. Cullen wanted her to be free to do whatever she wanted.

  But you also don’t want to be like her ex. Controlling.

  Fuck.

  “Sorry,” he muttered. “Just want you to myself. What hours are you working tomorrow?”

  “I’ve got two classes to run. One from ten to eleven-thirty and the other from two until three-thirty.”

  “And you’re free in between?”

  “Yes. What did you want to do?”

  “I have some ideas,” he told her. “But for now, you need some sleep.”

  “I know.” She was quiet for a moment. “Would you really spank me?”

  “Yep. Unless it frightens you?”

  “It doesn’t frighten me. I know you wouldn’t really hurt me.”

  Fuck. She was killing him. “Thanks for trusting me, baby.”

  “I don’t think you’ll have to spank me, anyway. I’m always a good girl.”

  He snorted. “You’re delusional.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I already owe you two punishments.”

  “For what?”

  “For going outside when I told you not to. And for putting yourself down.”

  “You didn’t hear me put myself down!” she protested.

  “But did you?”

  “Well, yes, but I shouldn’t get punished if you didn’t hear it.”

  “Not the way it works, baby. Now go to sleep or we’ll be heading for a third.”

  She let out an irritated sigh
.

  “Baby?”

  “Trying to sleep here,” she muttered.

  “Is it okay to spank you with your arthritis? I won’t harm you further?”

  “What. No.” She tried to shrink away from him, but he wouldn’t let her.

  “Ivy,” he warned. “We need to talk about this.”

  “I don’t want to talk about it. I hate talking about it. I hate telling anyone.”

  “Because Davis made you ashamed of it? Made you think there was something wrong with you?”

  “There is something wrong with me.”

  Oh no. He wasn’t having that. Gently, he rolled her onto her back, then loomed over her.

  “Excuse me? You want to try that again? There is nothing wrong with you.”

  “It’s likely going to get worse,” she whispered to him. “You haven’t seen my hands. They’re ugly.”

  Fuck. No.

  “Nothing about you is ugly. I won’t have you ever speak about yourself like that. Do you understand me?”

  “I understand. But—”

  “No, there are no buts. No part of you could ever be ugly. And I don’t care what your hands look like. They’re part of you. By the way, that’s number three.”

  “Number three?”

  “Punishment number three. You’re going to have a very sore bottom. Perhaps you also need some corner time.”

  She gasped. “What? You wouldn’t!”

  “Am I your Top?” he asked seriously. Because they needed to get this shit worked out. Even if they did wake Marcus. Although he was still snoring softly.

  “I…I…”

  “If I am, then I’m going to enforce the rules. Through punishments we agree on. Actually, you need to agree to the rules first.”

  “The rules?”

  “The ones I gave you earlier.”

  “You were serious about those?”

  Yeah. Okay. He needed to slow down. He was overloading her. This had to be a lot for her to take in.

  “Yes, baby. I was serious about those rules.”

  “Oh.” She was quiet for a moment. “I agree to them. Although we might need to figure out what putting myself in danger means exactly because I think our ideas on that might differ.”

  “They might. But if it feels wrong, it’s wrong.”

  “Really?” There was a hint of exasperation in her voice.

  “Really. And the consequences? You agree to those as well?”

  “Spanking? Corner time?”

  “Yes. Spanking over the knee. No implements. Not for a start, anyway. No writing lines with your hands or any sort of bondage. At any time if I do anything that makes your hands hurt or puts your health in jeopardy, you’ll say your safeword.”

  “What’s my safeword?”

  “What would you like?”

  “How about laundry? I used to hate doing the laundry. Guess I still do.”

  “All right, baby,” he told her gently. “Laundry it is.”

  “I agree,” she whispered. “Are you…are you sure about this? About being a Daddy? It’s what you want? I’m what you want? I’ve suppressed my Little for so long, I’m not sure she can come out. What if she won’t? What if I don’t know how? What if you don’t like her? What if I don’t?”

  “Baby, breathe. Just breathe. Everything will be fine.” Leaning down, he kissed her. “Stop worrying. I will do the worrying for both of us. All you have to do is trust in me. Can you do that?”

  “Yes.”

  “Good girl. Now roll over and close your eyes. It’s time for sleep. I have you. Nothing bad will happen while I have you.”

  Chapter 8

  “Great job, Emily,” she praised the sweet girl as she held up the Christmas decoration she’d created. Emily beamed up at her.

  “Right, everyone. That’s the end of the session,” she called out.

  They all groaned, but their teacher gave them a firm look. They filed out of the room with calls of goodbye. A wave of fatigue overcame her when the last one left. She still had this afternoon’s session to get through, and she wasn’t sure how she would manage it.

  What she needed was a nap. But there was no time for that. Cullen would be here soon to take her for lunch. She blushed as she remembered that morning. He’d ordered breakfast in, fussing at both her and Marcus to eat. Then they’d both walked with Marcus to the Littles’ wing. And, not for the first time, she’d wished she was going with him. That she got to spend the day with the other Littles. Even though she thought she’d likely be too shy.

  “Ivy?”

  Turning, she smiled at Derek. “Hi, Derek.”

  “Hey, darlin’. Everything good with the class?”

  “Yep, we’ve made lots of decorations for the Christmas tree.” She waved over at the large Christmas tree in the corner of the room. It would stay there for the Christmas Eve party, which was being organized by Little Delights, a party planning service. A really sweet guy called Eli was doing a lot of it.

  “Good. Everything okay with you?”

  She tilted her head. “Yes, fine. Why?”

  “I talked to Cullen yesterday. He was grabbing some things from your room for you.”

  “Yes, he did. I hope that was all right?”

  Derek waved his hand at that. “I wanted to check in with you last evening but you were asleep.”

  “Oh, yeah. I wasn’t feeling too great.”

  Concern filled his face. “But you’re all right now?”

  “Yep!” she said cheerfully.

  He gave her a skeptical look. Yeah, she felt like crap. But she had one more class to get through and she was going to do it.

  “Hmm. You know that if you’re not feeling well, then no one expects you to work.”

  “I’ll be fine. I love doing these classes. Was there something you wanted to talk to me about?”

  “Yeah, there was. You’ve been doing a great job here, Ivy. I hope you know that.”

  “That’s really kind of you to say,” she told him with a beaming smile on her face. Happiness filled her with his praise. Davis had never given her compliments. He’d never have told her she was doing a good job.

  “It’s just the truth. I was going to offer you a full-time job, actually.”

  “You were? Doing what?”

  “Thought you could do activities with the Littles. Especially around all the holidays.”

  “There’d be enough work for that?”

  “Well, I thought it might be best for you to work part time. It would come with room and board, of course.”

  “That would be amazing.” Even if it barely paid anything, the fact that she could stay here for free was everything she needed.

  “I take it you like the idea.”

  “I do.” She nodded. “Thank you.”

  “Wasn’t sure if you would want it now.” He watched her steadily.

  Why wouldn’t she want it now?

  Maybe because of Cullen.

  Oh. Shit.

  Cullen wanted to get to know her. To be her Top. But what happened when he left? Where would she go? If she followed him home, then she wouldn’t have a job. A place to live.

  “Hey, it wasn’t meant to upset you. Cullen isn’t pressuring you into anything, is he?” Derek asked.

  “What? No, of course not. He would never do that. He’s a really good man. It’s just hidden under a layer of gruffness.”

  “I know a few people like that,” Derek said. “Make sure you talk to Cullen about the job. It’s good to know all your options. And I’m always here if you need to talk.”

  “Talk about what?” Cullen asked, walking into the room. His gaze ran over her, as though checking that she was all right. She loved that. The way he watched over her. “Everything all right? You look tired. Are your hands hurting?”

  When weren’t her hands hurting? But she didn’t say that, instead she just smiled. “They’re fine.”

  His gaze narrowed suspiciously.

  “I’ve got to go feed Sadie,�
� Derek said. “See you both later.”

  When he was gone, Cullen moved forward and gently grasped hold of her chin, tilting her face back to study her. “Something’s wrong.”

  “I’m just a little tired, I guess.”

  He nodded, then held out his bent arm to her. She slipped her arm through his. “Thought you might be. I’ve organized some lunch in our room.”

  “You did? That’s nice of you.”

  He grunted. “Don’t tell anyone. I don’t want it getting out.”

  She giggled. “Think it might ruin your rep?”

  “You know it. Next thing you know, people will start wanting to engage in small talk with me.” He shuddered. “I can’t have that.”

  “God forbid people think you are friendly.”

  “Exactly. So glad you understand me.”

  Opening the door to their suite, he let her in first. She stepped in then came to a stop with a gasp. On the floor was a red and white checked cloth. Set on it was a large container of potato salad as well as a plate filled with sandwiches and some cut up veggies and dip.

  “Wow, this is amazing.”

  There were even cushions set on the floor, and on each cushion sat one of her gnomes. Well, all except Bart and Twinkles. She felt a pang of sadness, even though she knew that was silly. They were just gnomes. They weren’t real.

  “Here, have a seat beside Binky.” He actually helped her sit down, steadying her. Then she noticed that one of the plates was in the shape of a Christmas tree. As Cullen sat, he picked that plate up and started putting bits of food on it before setting it in front of her.

  “All of that’s for me?”

  “It is. Juice box? I have apple or orange.”

  “Apple, please.”

  After setting up her juice box for her, he grabbed a normal plate, which was so much more boring, and placed food on it.

  She watched him in wonder. He put down the sandwich he’d just taken a bite from and used a napkin to wipe his face. “Do I have something on my face?”

  “What? No. Why?”

  “Just the way you’re staring at me.”

  “Oh no, that was just…I can’t believe you did this. You even got me a Christmas tree plate. And you hate Christmas.”

  He grimaced. “I can’t take responsibility for that. I asked for a special plate for my Little and that’s the one they gave me in the kitchen.”