by Amie Nichols
“Oh,” was all I could muster. I felt like I could burst into tears. Seeing Luke every day is what got me through. Now what was I going to do?
Weeks passed and there was still no Luke. After a few months I finally stopped running to the window every morning in the hopes that I would see his truck in the driveway. It was evident that he was not coming back. I always thought that he would take me away from here one day. I was hoping that he had feelings for me even though I'd just turned fifteen and he was now a senior in high school, but I always dreamed that when I was older he would act on those feelings. I was just a foolish girl. He didn’t like me like that. He only cared because I was a helpless, abused little girl and he felt sorry for me. It never stopped my day dreaming though. One thing constant in those dreams was always Luke.
Chapter 2
I’m caught staring out the window at Luke when his eyes meet mine. I am hypnotized by his magnificent brown eyes as I watch him from the window. Wanting to look away but I can’t, he gives me a sideways smile and a wink before he turns back to his dad. His smile is very warm and it gives me the chills. I step away from the window feeling weak in the knees so I sit on the bed. His affect is much more powerful now. I would feel excited to see him before, but this is a whole new level.
I wish that I could talk to Emma, but can’t risk using the cell phone that Miss Finnegan got me during the day with Jane home. It’s hidden safely. If I got caught Miss Finnegan could get fired. I plop back on my bed with my feet dangling off the side and stare at the ceiling thinking of what I wouldn’t give to go out and talk to him. Of course, I can’t with Jane being home.
My day dreaming is interrupted when I hear a knock on my bedroom door before it opens and Miss Finnegan enters. She has a large smile on her face. I know that means that she’s overheard something good.
“She’s leaving for the weekend to treat the ladies to a spa weekend,” Miss Finnegan informs me. I jump up in excitement. She hasn’t left for a while and I need some freedom.
“When is she leaving?” I ask her overjoyed by the news.
“Tomorrow morning,” she tells me. Her voice is low so the conversation cannot be overheard. “How are your arms dear?” She says as she lifts the sleeves of my shirt to reveal the hand shaped bruises that Jane had left. She shakes her head and leans down to kiss my forehead letting me know she loves me, even though there was nothing she could do for me.
“I have to get back to the kitchen. She’s requested supper by six so she can get to bed early,” she states wringing her hands nervously. “I will bring you some food when she goes to bed.” I can tell she is trying to keep me away from her so I don’t do anything else to get in trouble today. Miss Finnegan is right. I nod to her in agreement so that she knows I will stay put, not wanting to risk it myself.
I return to the window, but don’t see Luke anymore. My heart sinks wanting to at least watch him since I can’t talk to him. I pray he will be back tomorrow so I can see him after Jane leaves.
I must have fallen asleep waiting for the night to pass, because I wake up and it is dark out. The small alarm clock at my bedside table reads twelve thirty. I feel like I was woken up by a noise, but I’m not sure what it is that I heard. As my eyes adjust to the dark, I lay my head back down on the pillow and hear it again. It’s a slight ping on my window, like a bug or something is hitting it gently. I walk over to the window not turning the lights on and see Luke standing on the walk just below my window.
For a second I think that I’m dreaming as I stare at the exquisite site below me, but I realize that I’m not when he waves at me motioning for me to come outside. I feel excited and scared at the same time. What does he want? Can I risk getting caught sneaking out of the house? I open my window just enough to hang out of it a little.
“Come outside,” he whispers so softly that I can barely make out his words.
Come outside? What is he thinking? If we get caught it would be bad. I stand there thinking for a moment, pondering if it is worth the risk. Jane takes sleeping pills so she is surely out cold.
I stare down for a minute not saying a word contemplating what I should do. I see that Luke is about to speak again and place my index finger over my lips motioning him to be silent. Holding up two fingers to let him know that it might take me a couple minutes, I turn from the window and shut it very quietly. I am wearing an oversized t-shirt that I put on before bed. Quickly pulling on some cut off jean shorts, I grab a pair of sandals that I will put on outside. I open my bedroom door very slowly so it won’t make a sound. My heart races as I walk towards the stairs. The house is dead silent and dark. I stop at the top of the stairs turning my head towards Jane’s room, but I don’t hear anything.
Tiptoeing down the stairs, I stop every time there is a sound to make sure there is no movement coming from her room. I’m not even sure if she ever leaves her room at night because I’ve never dared to do it when she is home. I make it to the bottom deciding the back door off the kitchen is the farthest from Jane’s room and would make the least amount of noise. The only bad thing is that it is closer to Miss Finnegan’s. Her room is off the kitchen on the other side of the utility room where the washing, drying, and ironing take place.
Although I don’t want to be caught by her either, I take my chances because I would rather it be her than Jane. I open the back door and push open the screen. As it starts to squeak I stop to listen for any sound of Miss Finnegan stirring. After a minute there is nothing, and I squeeze through the door shutting it gently behind me.
Feeling relieved and excited that I made it out, I breathe in the warm fresh air as I step out on the back patio. I feel so invigorated that I just did that. It’s almost like a whole new world opened up to me. I can’t imagine why I have never done this before. Walking toward the end of the patio, I slip on my sandals and let my eyes try to adjust to the darkness.
I wonder where he is. Is he waiting out front for me thinking I would’ve tried the front door? As I reach the corner of the mansion I see him walking my way. Neither of us says a word, and before I know it we are standing face to face.
Luke gives me that warm sideways smile and then a small shhh escapes his lips. I feel my belly doing a flip-flop from being this close to him. He takes my hand and I feel an electrical current run up my arm. He leads me away from the house to the back of the property. We walk through the trees till we reach Georgia’s stone. It’s a large pile of rocks and one large boulder that sits at the back of the property. It was named after Ted’s great grandmother Georgia Sumnor. Luke motions for me to have a seat on one of the smaller boulders that face away from the house. I have spent a lot of time sitting on Georgia’s stone when Jane is gone just sitting and watching nature. It is very close to the timber that surrounds the plantation. If I sit there silent and still, I can see a lot of wildlife and birds. It has always been very peaceful.
Luke is sitting beside me. Since we are a safe distant from the house it’s okay to talk now.
“Hi,” Luke says softly, staring off into the timber not looking in my direction.
“It’s so good to see you again, Luke. I’ve missed you,” I tell him staring at the side of his face. He smells so good, clean with just a touch of some cologne mixed with something else. Not sure what it is, but I like it. It makes me want to lean closer so I can breathe him in deep.
“I saw you watching me today,” he says turning my way, placing his chin on the side of his arm. “I just felt like I needed to see you and I couldn’t wait until tomorrow.” I feel like I am about to turn to Jell-O, feeling so weak from the words he whispers.
“Yeah, I was staring. I was staring at a man that I haven’t seen for so long. I could hardly believe it was you,” I say bitterly, because he hasn’t come back since that day he sent me inside. Not even to say goodbye. “You look different,” I say shyly.
“Different good or different bad?”
“Good, very good,” I mutter and go flush. I feel him slide a little clo
ser to me as he chuckles at my admission. The air between us is thick and I am having a hard time breathing.
“Lilly flower, you look different too. It is definitely different good. You're even more beautiful than I remember,” he says moving toward me, bumping my shoulder with his. Lilly flower is what he always used to call me. It still has the same effect on me, only more so now. Heat runs through my body like a tidal wave.
“Who I remember as a little girl is now a very stunning woman,” he turns his head straight staring out into the darkness the same as me. “You are only sixteen, and you are already so…. ” He mumbles under his breath not finishing his statement. This makes me blush even more, knowing that he thinks I’m beautiful and stunning. I can’t wrap my head around it.
Jane always tells me that I am so ordinary and I will probably never land a husband. Miss Finnegan tells me it is what’s on the inside that counts. Emma says I’m drop dead sexy, but compared to her I feel like an ugly duckling.
“You never said goodbye. I thought I would never see you again.” I blurt out the words before I realize how pitiful they sound.
“I’m truly sorry Lilly. Don’t think it wasn’t hard. Dad insisted that I not come anymore. I think you know why.” Regret fills his voice, and deep down I know the truth. I know why.
“I was a foolish little girl with a crush. I’m sure it was awkward for you having me hang around you all the time. You surely had a girlfriend.” The thought makes me cringe. I hope he doesn’t tell me that he has one even if he does. I can live in my fantasy world. The thought of another girl having what I have desperately wanted for so long makes me queasy.
“You were not foolish, but you were a girl. You still are a girl, Lilly, but I never felt awkward. In fact, I loved spending time with you. And just for the record, there was no girlfriend. There isn’t one now either,” he says bumping my shoulder with his again. My belly flips flops from the simple touch.
“Are you helping your dad for a while?” I’m desperate to know how long he will be around.
“Yeah, he’s been busy with all the landscaping Mrs. Sumnor is wanting done.” I can feel him staring at me as I look off into the darkness. Everything is silent for a while. All we hear is the chirping of the night’s insects and the rustling of the trees in the timber from what little breeze there is. It is a muggy June summer night and I’m very warm. Not just from the temperature of the air, but from sitting so close to Luke that we are almost touching.
Luke’s leg moves a little touching mine, and even through his jeans I can feel electricity run through my body. My breath hitches, embarrassing me immediately, as Luke turns to me.
“Are you ok?” He has concern in his voice, but something else in his eyes. Does he feel it too?
“Umm, yeah. I’d better be getting back in the house.” I stumble for words not knowing how to explain what just happened. I can’t explain it because I don’t know how a simple touch can have such an effect on me. I go to stand and Luke hurriedly stands up first taking my hand. He helps me up very gentleman like. This too is having a reaction on me. I feel weak at the knees but try very hard to not let it show.
We start walking back to the house in silence. Luke is still holding my hand, and I feel like I am walking on pillows. We are walking slowly so I am able to hide the fact that my legs feel like jelly. He’s so strong and confident next to me. I wonder if he is feeling the same thing that I am, surely not. He probably has beautiful girls throwing themselves at him all the time. What would he want with someone like me? Was it pity that made him come to see me tonight? Had he heard about what Jane had done today from Miss Finnegan? I don’t want him knowing any of it and will try my hardest to make sure that I keep it all from him.
We make it back to the patio on the backside of the house. Luke leans down so his lips are close to my ear and whispers, “Goodnight, Lilly flower. I’ll see you tomorrow.” His lips graze my ear lightly causing me to gasp again as chills run through me. He looks at me and I can tell his mind is racing. Before another word can be said, he squeezes my hand and takes off into the darkness. I am standing alone in the darkness and can still feel his warm breath on my ear. A shiver runs down my spine. My insides feel toasty warm even though goose bumps are forming on my arms.
I make it back to my room with no one the wiser, just as easily as I had made it out. I notice the clock says two thirty. What seemed like a matter of minutes with Luke was really two hours. I crawl into bed and lay there wide awake. All I can think about is him. For the first time in two years I am actually looking forward to waking up tomorrow, because I will get to see Luke again.
Chapter 3
I wake up the next morning around nine to a knock on my door. When I roll over I see Miss Finnegan standing over my bed. “Wake up sleepy head, she’s gone,” she says smiling from ear to ear as I stretch.
Last night’s events suddenly come to me. For a minute I think it had to be a dream, but it wasn’t. My insides are still warm. I can’t help but grin from ear to ear feeling great. Not only because Jane is gone, but because I can’t wait to see Luke.
“I’m going to take a shower,” I inform Miss Finnegan as I disappear into the bathroom shutting the door. I feel the urge to look really nice for Luke.
“I’m going to run some errands dear, I’ll be back later this afternoon,” Miss Finnegan yells through the door, and I hear my bedroom door close as she leaves.
After my shower I search my closet for something to wear. Unfortunately I don’t have many nice things to choose from, other than the few frilly southern belle dresses that I have to wear when Jane is entertaining and I am expected to play the dutiful daughter role. Hidden in the back of the closet I find some white shorts and a nicer light blue short sleeved top. Emma had bought it for my birthday and I have never worn it. I throw it on and look in the mirror. The shorts are a lot shorter than I have ever worn. I tug them down a little till they reach my upper thighs, which leaves a little of my belly button showing since the shirt is short also. The sleeves barely cover my bruises, but at least they are covered. I fluff up my curly brown hair deciding that down is best and leave it to drape over my shoulders. Emma had left some light pink lip gloss for me and I brush some on my lips.
I walk into the kitchen and my heart starts racing just thinking about him. Before I can change my mind, I slip out the French door to go search for him. It doesn’t take long for me to find him sitting in the shade of a cypress tree eating his lunch. I stop in my tracks when I see him. My knees go weak and my mouth instantly goes dry. His legs are bent and he has his toned muscular arms resting on his knees. He sees me and waves me over. I walk his way with my head down trying not to look too eager. When I reach him, he pats the grass motioning for me to sit down. “Keep me company,” he tells me giving me his gorgeous smile.
“You hungry?” He asks offering me half of his sandwich then looks into my eyes. I feel the heat between us as his dark brown eyes look me up and down. I don’t know if I imagined it or not, but there is a flicker in his eyes that makes me think he does feel the same way I do.
“No, thank you.” I feel like all my nerve endings are on high alert as I sit cross-legged next to him and smile.
“You’ve got a gorgeous smile, you know,” he says making me blush.
“I hear Jane is gone for a few days. That’s really good news.”
“It’s the best news, because I can relax a bit when she’s gone.” I wave my hands in the air in an I’m free motion. My hair that was cascading over my arms brushes way and my sleeves inch up.
Instantly Luke is up on his knees and takes my wrist. He pulls up the sleeve of my shirt. “When did she do this?” Luke growls and does the same to my other arm revealing another hand shaped bruise.
I shouldn’t have worn this shirt knowing the sleeves were too short. “Did your mother do that?” His concern deepens as he takes a hold of my wrist and twists my arm to see the entire bruise.
“No, she’s not my mother! Jane d
id it and its fine,” I snap at him. My reaction causes him to let go of my wrist and I instantly apologize. “Sorry, I mean Jane is not my mother. I don’t like her being called that,” I say in a much softer tone.
“Well, whatever you call her, it’s not fine,” he grates.
“It’s OK. I’m OK. Let’s not talk about it please,” I say calmly.
“Jesus, I can’t believe she gets away with treating you like that. She needs to be in jail for child abuse!” Luke yells then punches the ground. His outburst makes me jump and his hand reaches up to my face. “I’m sorry, please don’t be scared.” He moves so he is sitting on his knees facing me. What is more upsetting than anything is that he said “child,” he thinks of me as a child.
“I’m not scared. I could never be scared of you.”
Luke reaches out grabbing my hand giving it a squeeze sending white-hot lightning up my arm. The warmth of his touch makes me forget all my thoughts for a moment. I turn to him and his eyes are intense staring at me.
“It won’t be long and you will be free,” he tells me then abruptly frees my hand. I can tell something in the distance makes him do so. I turn and look in the direction of his alarm and see his dad walking our way. “I’ll be here again tonight. Meet me at the end of the lane the same time as last night,” he whispers before his dad is upon us.
“Luke, I believe your lunch break is over son,” Jeffery says sternly looking at us with dismay. “Lilly, good to see you sweetheart. I trust Luke has not been bothering you?” He says turning his attention to just me.
“Oh no, I enjoy his company,” I tell him and give him the most innocent smile I can muster. “It’s nice to see him again. It has been so long,” I add.
