by Amie Nichols
I hear him draw in a sharp breath as he notices the deep blue hand shaped bruises on my arms. He quickly averts his eyes from me to Luke.
“Come on son, we’ve got work to do,” he orders Luke and turns to walk away.
Luke gets up. Before he turns to follow his dad, he mouths to me “tonight” with a sweet smile and a wink then he hurries to catch up with his dad. I sit and stare at them walk away. When they are out of earshot, I see them start to argue. I can tell that Jeffery says something to Luke that instantly infuriates him. They seem to share a heated argument before Luke finally walks away in a huff. I see Jeffrey shake his head in frustration and walk in the opposite direction.
The rest of the day I am fidgety and restless as I move from one room to another watching the clock. “You’ve got ants in your pants,” Miss Finnegan says to me when I start making laps around the kitchen table not able to sit still. She’s making supper for her and me. Usually as soon as the dishes are done she retires for the night.
“No,” I say defensively. “Just seem to have a lot of energy today.” I quickly add as she looks at me with confusion to my response.
“I bought you some more books when I went out today,” she tells me. Normally I would be really excited about this. I love to pass the boring days with a good book that Miss Finnegan sneaks to me. I really get into the stories, and for a while I am in another happy place. But today I am going to do something that I never dreamed I would ever be able to do while I lived in this house. The time is moving so slow that I almost think the clock is going backwards.
“Thanks,” I tell her trying to be enthusiastic so she doesn’t get suspicious. “I can’t wait till after supper so I can start reading.” I lie and she seems to buy it as she dishes us up some chicken and rice. My belly is in knots and I can hardly swallow the bite that I put in my mouth.
“Does it not taste good dear?" She asks me when she notices me pushing the food around on my plate not eating.
“No, it’s very good.” I smile at her and force down a few more bites as she watches me. I continue this for the next ten minutes then tell her that I’m full. She accepts this without concern and I excuse myself telling her that I am going to my room to start on one of the books she bought me.
“Goodnight dear,” she says to me as I walk out of the kitchen and head to my room. I know in the next hour she will be fast asleep.
The next two hours are excruciating. I’m excited and nervous at the same time to see Luke.
When the clock reaches midnight, I start sneaking out of the house. I’m wearing blue jeans and I have my Nike’s in hand as I make my way down the stairs. When I’m on the main floor, I stop to listen. The house is silent and dark. Miss Finnegan is in her room on the other side of the utility room. I make my way to the front door without making a sound and am able to slip out of the front door with success. I smile to myself as I sit on the front step tying my shoelaces breathing in the fresh night air.
I’m not sure when Luke will be here, so I just wait on the front step silently as my eyes adjust to the darkness outside. It’s not long before I make out the front lane. Some clouds that were over the moon float away and the bright full moon illuminates the front yard.
I hear the faint sound of an old truck at the end of the lane and my heart skips a beat knowing that it’s Luke. I decide to meet him so I start walking down the lane through the hundred year old live oak trees that line either side. Their limbs arch over the road shutting out any moonlight making it hard for me to see. A few yard lights give me enough brightness to see where I am going. Within minutes, I see him walking toward me and I feel weak in the knees at the sight of him. He is wearing Levi’s with holes in the knees and a t-shirt that is tight enough that all his muscles show through the thin material.
We reach each other and Luke takes my hand to lead me down the lane. I follow him, my fingers tingling from his touch, not saying a word. It’s not long before we reach his old beat up truck.
“I want to show you something,” he says finally speaking while opening the driver’s side door of his truck.
“We’re leaving?” I ask him with apprehension. I’ve never left the grounds with anyone, other than Miss Finnegan, and that was very seldom, only for the occasional doctor’s visit.
“Don’t you trust me?” He says as sadness fills his eyes.
“Completely,” I say and climb up in the tall truck, scooting over the ripped vinyl seat to the passenger side. The passenger door has no handle and it’s held closed by a bungee cord. He climbs in after me with a huge smile on his face.
“You need to sit closer to me. I don’t want you falling out of that door.” He smiles, patting the middle section of the bench seat next to him. “It’s not exactly what I would call secure,” he says motioning to the make shift door handle of the passenger side.
I scoot back towards him stopping when my shoulder touches his, making my heart speed up with his touch.
“That’s better.” Reaching over me he grabs a seatbelt strap that is tucked into the crease of the seat and fumbles down between us for another strap. He ties the two broken pieces together at my waist in a secure slipknot. My belly tightens when the back of his hand brushes my lower abdomen.
“Sorry. This is kind of cheesy, but at least you’re buckled up.” He smiles at his handy work.
“I think it’s perfect.” I grin looking straight ahead as he starts the truck and it roars to life. As he starts down the road, I turn to him. “Where are we going?”
“Some place very special to me that I have never shown anyone before,” he answers giving me the sexiest wicked grin. He has such a gorgeous face, and I think to myself that I want to kiss every inch of it. My face burns red at my thoughts and I look down bashfully not wanting Luke to see me.
“What?” He says looking at me. I can see him tilt his head so he can see my face.
“Nothing, I’m just really excited to be out of the house,” I say to him.
“I’m excited too,” he says taking my hand in his and resting them on his thigh. We sit in silence while my hand is in his, my breath quickening from his touch. I can feel the warmth of his leg through his jeans. My thoughts start to wander and I think what it would be like to touch his strong thigh without the denim barrier. The thought makes my heart skip a beat and I intake a sharp breath. Luke turns to me and shows me that wicked grin again making me blush. I wonder if he is reading my mind. Giving my hand a tight squeeze, he lets go leaving my hand to rest on his thigh. I feel his muscle tighten as his leg moves to touch the brake when he slows to turn on a dirt road. I quickly move my hand into my lap. My mind is in overdrive from all these feelings.
The dirt road is overgrown with trees and brush. It looks like no one ever drives it. I am forced into Luke’s shoulder as we hit a large bump in the road.
“Hold on baby, it’s a bumpy ride,” Luke tells me. His eyes do not leave the road. Both of his hands are planted firmly on the steering wheel.
I grab the dash of the truck since it’s the only thing I can hold on to besides Luke. He just called me baby. I already can’t seem to keep a calm head, so touching him is not a good idea right now.
I’m distracted by the road that seems to go on forever, and I can feel my bottom starting to get sore from it bouncing up and down on the hard seat. Just when I think it will never be over, the truck slows and we are in a clearing. The full moon illuminates the body of water in front of us. I am taken aback at the beauty.
There’s a large pond with boulders surrounding it in what looks like a perfect circle. A small waterfall is off to the side where a stream enters into the pond. The water cascades over a series of rocks that stagger in different directions making the water go this way and that. Colossal Cypress trees surround the banks with their limbs dangling giving it a spooky but romantic feel. A wooden dock extends to the middle and ends with a small gazebo perched dead center of the pond.
I turn to Luke who is climbing out of the truck an
d reaches for my hand to help me out. I climb down with his assistance and we walk towards the water.
“What is this place?” I ask not able to take my eyes off the glistening water.
“I found it. Someone obviously made it a long time ago, but I don’t know who. I’ve been coming here for a couple of years and have never seen a soul,” he explains. “As far as I can tell, this is public land. I think,” he says looking my direction.
“It’s so beautiful. Can we go out there?” I ask pointing to the gazebo.
“Yes, it’s safe. The dock was broken up when I found it, but I have slowly fixed it up,” he tells me as he leads me toward the dock, my hand in his.
“I can’t believe someone would make something this beautiful and then never come here.” I express when we reach the gazebo. Wooden benches line the edges and there is a wrought iron table in the middle with matching chairs.
“Well, I think whoever did is long gone. I think it was built in the 40’s. At least that is when this table was built,” he says motioning to the wrought iron set. “This is the only thing that I have been able to date,” he explains sitting on one of the benches. “The dock was rotten when I found it, so I believe whoever did build it hasn’t been here for a long time.”
“How did you find it anyway? It’s not exactly accessible,” I say thinking of the long drive on that bumpy overgrown road.
“That’s probably why I’ve never seen anyone else here. One of the things I like to do when I am frustrated or angry at something is to find old roads and see where they lead,” Luke says staring up at me. “I found this spot the day my father told me I couldn’t work at the plantation anymore. I had just gotten my truck the week before, and when I left the plantation I somehow noticed the road,” he explains still watching me as I stare at the waterfall. “I tore down that bumpy road. I was so angry that it somehow made me feel better. When I found this, I knew that someday I would bring you here,” he says softly.
I look up at him shocked by his last statement. His eyes were staring back at me so soft and warm. My mouth goes dry and my belly tightens at the thought of him thinking of me when he found this place. I have no idea how to respond so I just sit next to him on the bench, pull my knees up, and wrap my arms around them. I rest my chin on my knees and stare out into the water.
Luke stands up and pulls a small flash light out of his pocket. His back is facing me and my mind can’t help but to start wandering again. His jeans are tight around his bottom and I stare at the magnificent sight. He turns toward me and I avert my eyes quickly so he doesn’t know what I was staring at. He must have noticed, because a knowing smile forms as he looks down at me.
“Come here.” Luke motions for me to stand up so I can look at something on one of the posts that is holding up the gazebo roof.
My face flushes from all of the thoughts running through my head. I stand up to look at what he is pointing to. He shines the flashlight on the post and carved into it is a Calla Lily that is so beautiful and detailed. Underneath is an inscription, “To my sweet Lilly Flower.”
“You did that? Is that me?”
“Yes and yes,” Luke answers shyly, watching my face for a reaction.
My face flushes with warmth and excitement. I continue to stare at the carving. I’m so confused. Does he have the same feelings for me that I have for him? Luke walks around to my side and I can feel him staring at me.
“I know that you don’t understand, Lilly, but you are never far from my mind. Soon you will be free from Jane and you can live your life. You are such a beautiful, vibrant woman, and one day you are going to shine.” He’s standing so close to my side that I can feel his breath on my cheek. I feel so weak and my mind is racing with all that he is telling me.
He stops talking and takes a step back from me, sighing heavily.
“What’s wrong?” I ask seeing a look of pain on his face.
“I’m twenty years old and you’re only seventeen.” His voice is deep with anguish as he steps closer to me so I can feel his shirt brush my shoulder. “No matter how much I want to, how much it hurts, I can’t act on what I am feeling.” I feel heat radiating from him. I want him to act on what he is feeling because I am feeling it too.
I turn to look up at him. His eyes are dark, looking so longingly at me. Before I know it, I step toward him wrapping my arms around his waist pressing myself to him. I rest the side of my face on his warm hard chest. I feel my whole body burst. The electricity is setting my skin on fire.
Luke’s arms engulf me and I have never felt so safe in my entire life. I look up into his eyes and I think he is about to kiss me when he looks away.
“I need to get you home, Lilly,” Luke whispers. I don’t want to let go. I feel his heart beating so strong against my face.
“I want to stay here with you,” I breathe into his shirt, but Luke pulls away from me and starts to direct me towards the dock.
“Please, Lilly. I’m sorry. I have to get you back. I should have never brought you here. I thought it would make me feel better, but it has only made things worse,” Luke says taking my hand and leading me to the truck.
We sit in silence as we bounce back down the bumpy dirt road. I’m confused as to what has just happened. I want him to act on his feelings, but don’t know how to tell him. I feel like something has changed and I don’t know what or how it did. He seems more distant now, not the same as just a few hours ago when he picked me up.
“Did I make you mad?” I ask Luke, still sitting in the truck after we pull up to the end of my lane. He hops out and reaches for my hand to help me out, but I don’t take it. I scoot across the seat and jump down without his assistance.
“No. Oh God no, Lilly.” Luke shakes his head at me looking hurt at my rejection to his help. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking. I was selfish telling you how I felt and now I know my dad was right.” Luke’s head drops and he stares at the ground.
“What are you talking about?” I am agitated and my mind is racing.
“I’ve got to go. I’m sorry, Lilly. You better get back in the house before you get caught,” Luke says climbing in his truck and leaving me on the side of the road in front of the mansion. I’m so stunned that I just stand there watching the red taillights get farther and farther away until I can’t see them at all.
Walking up the lane to the house, I move slowly trying to process what has happened in these few short hours. Luke going from so happy to see me to can’t wait to get away from me.
I am back in my room lying on my bed replaying the events of the night. Sadness over takes me and the tears start to fall. Before long, I have cried myself to sleep.
Chapter 4
I’m awakened by the worst sound in the world. Jane is yelling at Mckayla to hurry up with her bags.
One freaking day, all I get is one freaking day. I go to the door and open it a crack to catch what I can hear. “Mrs. Sumnor, what a lovely surprise to see you home so soon,” I hear Miss Finnegan say walking toward Jane’s room.
“Adeline had to come back to take care of some business so we are leaving again tomorrow,” I hear Jane tell her.
I close the door and lean up against it relieved she’ll be leaving again soon. I really wanted to see Luke so I could clear this whole thing up.
After I’ve showered and dressed, I go down to the kitchen to get some breakfast. Jane and Mckayla are sitting at the table discussing the itinerary for their trip. Jane looks up at me from over her teacup. “Well, it’s about time you rolled yourself out of bed. Would it kill you to clean yourself up? Jesus, you look like horse shit.” Jane says snidely and Mckayla chuckles.
“Thank you!” I say not looking at her. Grabbing a bowl from the cupboard I pour some cereal and milk then take a seat on one of the chairs that surround the kitchen island. I’ve only had about two hours of sleep, and with all the crying my face is swollen and splotchy. I am glad it is Sunday because Jeffrey and Luke won’t be here. I don’t want Luke
seeing me like this, and I also don’t want him to know that I spent two hours crying last night over him.
“Watch your mouth!” Jane shoots back at my thank you comment and I ignore her. I can tell with the mood she’s in and the way I am feeling that something bad is about to happen.
“Do you really have to eat like you were raised by wolves? Look at you slouching, making god awful sounds when you eat,” Jane starts in on me. I don’t look up and continue eating.
“See the disrespect I have to put up with,” she growls to Mckayla while I ignore her comment. “You look at me when I’m talking to you child!” She yells getting up and storming my way. Miss Finnegan tenses and I put down my spoon and turn toward her. Her cheek bones are high and eyes narrow. She’s wearing her usual bright pink lipstick, blue eye shadow, bright red hair up in a bun, and is dressed in a navy blue pantsuit.
“Well, what do you have to say for yourself?” She shouts at me her eyes scowling.
“I’m sorry that I crunched my crunchy cereal to loud,” I say it very snotty, fed up with her constant berating of me.
No sooner are the words out of my mouth when I feel sharp pain from her hand cross my cheek. “Don’t you dare talk to me that way you ungrateful bitch!” She screams her temper flaring, and with one swipe she sends my cereal bowl flying. I watch it crash on the floor, milk spraying everywhere. “Now get out of my sight,” she growls, her voice low and cruel as she points toward the door.
I stand up and run out of the kitchen up to my room. I’m so mad I want to scream. The side of my face aches from the blow and I run to the bathroom to see the swelling and the bruise starting already. This one’s going to be a black eye. Not my first one either. In fact I’ve lost count.
After about two hours Miss. Finnegan enters my room with an ice pack and a sandwich.
“Oh dear, that’s a bad one,” Miss Finnegan says rushing over to put the ice pack on my cheek. I wince at the instant pain from the little pressure she is applying, but the coolness feels very good against my hot skin.
