Christmas in Canberra

by Nicole Taylor

  “Nothing yet – that was when you arrived and they sort of forgot about it.”

  “Well, I doubt that!” Eve giggled at her.

  “And Roxanne is pregnant. Her baby is due a month after mine.”

  Eve laughed. She turned to Louise and said “Louise – you can’t miss this Christmas! Come on! It’s going to be a riot!”

  “I can’t face it, Aunty Eve. Now that Marie is going to ‘enter motherhood’, I’m the last girl in the family left single and childless – and I’m the eldest!” Louise shook her head.

  “So where are you going to spend the day?”

  “I have some single friends, men and women I know socially, and we are having Christmas lunch together.”

  “Louise!” Eve tapped her on the arm in mock remonstration. “Christmas is all about babies! Babies and single mothers!”

  “What?” Marie interjected.

  “Well, we all heard about Mary being betrothed to Joseph; and that he wasn’t Jesus’ real father – but do you remember them ever getting married?”

  This thought silenced Louise and Marie, who mentally sifted through their old catechism classes.

  “Besides, who cares? Every mother is a single mother when it all comes down to it. Sure, the father is useful if he is nice to the mother and supports the family, but otherwise women are on their own.” She looked at Marie. “Anyway, you’ll probably get married before too long. You’re young and beautiful. ’Course you will.”

  Louise smiled at Marie in the rear-view mirror. “She’s right,” she said to Marie.

  “Louise,” Eve hadn’t finished. “Can’t you go to see your friends later?”

  “I suppose I could,” answered Louise.

  “Good. Just ring them up; tell them your old aunty has arrived as a surprise and you will be there in a couple of hours.” Eve stubbed out her cigarette in the ashtray. “Now, Louise, tell me: What do you want?”

  “No, it’s fine,” answered Louise. “I’ll come to Jane’s with you first, and go to Simon’s later.”

  “No, not that!” Eve spoke with a serious tone. “I’m asking you what you want. Do you want a career? Do you want to get married one day and have a family?”

  “Well, those two things are not mutually exclusive you know,” said Louise. “I’d like both!”

  “I know you have a good job and you have finished lots of university courses, but what are you doing about the other thing?”

  “Marriage?” Louise smiled at her aunt.

  “Yes. Marriage. You are nearly thirty and you don’t even have a boyfriend. And don’t tell me you haven’t met the right person yet.” Eve sighed.

  Louise didn’t know what to say because she had been about to say precisely those words.

  Eve continued.“There is no ‘Right Person’, Louise. Either you want to get married and have a family or you don’t. Men know even less about it than you do, so don’t waste your time waiting for a guy to decide he wants to marry you and carry you off into the sunset. It’ll never happen.” Eve could see Louise was confused by this suggestion, so she continued her explanation.

  “Look, people get married for lots of different reasons. Most commonly it is because they both want to start a family together and it is convenient to do so because it solves accommodation issues and social issues. You are well past the age when men see marriage as solving an accommodation issue. If you wait too much longer you will end up marrying a divorced man with 3 kids he only sees every second weekend but gives half his net income to so you won’t be able to afford to have a child of your own.”

  Louise nodded glumly. “That’s exactly what my old school friend Margot and I have begun to realize.”

  “So, it is a choice. If you want to have a family with someone, choose someone who is still single AND interested in being your husband – but do it soon!”

  “But I can’t marry someone I don’t love!”

  “Marry someone you like! Even if you did marry someone you love now – believe me, there will dawn the day when you are looking forward to his next business or fishing trip as though it was your 16th birthday!” Eve laughed at her own joke, then continued. “Choose someone who thinks you are a prize. Choose a man who will be a good provider; and who has the same morals and standards as you. Choose someone you wouldn’t be ashamed of – who your children wouldn’t be ashamed of. Someone who is kind and generous and appreciates having you in their life.” She paused, waiting for her words to sink in. “But do it, Louise! Look, when you decided to become an accountant, what did you do?’

  “What do you mean?” Louise didn’t see where Eve was going with this question at all.

  “Well, did you go to the supermarket to buy a degree? No. Did you go to the park to look for a job? No. You went to the university and enrolled in an accounting degree. You looked for qualified accountants to work with. It’s the same thing with finding a husband. Men you meet in nightclubs are men who like to drink and watch girls. They are not looking for a wife – they are looking for a one night stand. Men who want to get married and have a family, hang out with other families and get involved with community things – doing things nice people like to do and hoping to meet a nice woman to do them with.

  “Really?” Louise wanted to know was Eve serious.

  “Yes,” answered Eve. “Really. Don’t look for fish up a tree.” Eve spoke in a gentler voice. “I may be a divorced 45 year old but at least I’ve had a family and a long marriage – and I’m not the only divorced 45 year old around. We all get older – so what? The important thing is to live your life fully. Have a life! I’d rather be in my position than an old maid who’d played it safe and never made a mistake. You have avoided mistakes by keeping your options open – but that is becoming your mistake! You can only be married to one man.”

  “Yes, that’s true,” said Louise thoughtfully. They’d arrived at Jane’s house and Louise was parking the car. They entered the house without knocking, knowing that they were expected and not wanting to pull anyone away from the fledgling party to answer the door.

  “You go and make that phone call straight away,” Eve ordered Louise. Tell them you’ll be there in a couple of hours.”

  Louise nodded and smiled at her aunt. She watched Eve walk into the house, followed by a defiant looking Marie. Louise and went to where the telephone sat, on a table under a mirror in the entrance hall. She looked at her reflection and thought about what Eve had said.

  When Simon answered she told him she’d be late. “I can’t promise that the object of your desire won’t be gone by the time you arrive,” Simon warned.

  “Oh, that’s alright,” Louise said. “I’ll eat here.”

  “I wasn’t talking about the food,” Simon laughed.

  Louise assumed Simon was tipsy, so didn’t take too much notice. “Would it be alright if I brought a friend along?”

  “Who?” Simon was suspicious. “Is she gorgeous, voluptuous and wearing a halterneck top?”

  “Yeah, sure,” laughed Louise.

  “Fine then,” Simon was clearly under the influence of something, thought Louise – Christmas good will; afternoon delight; booze. Possibly all three.

  “Great,” she said, and rang off with a promise to “see you soon”.

  *

  When Louise joined Jane’s Christmas party, she found the festivities in full progress. The kids had abandoned their many presents and were playing with the cat; Jim was attempting to surreptitiously examine the quite masterful retaining wall Sam had built in what Jim immediately recognized as the “correct” way: inserting rocks of various sizes so adeptly that no mortar was required to hold them together. Their weight, and interlocking dependency, held the wall together more securely than any concrete ever could. “You have to hand it to him,” Jim acknowledged grudgingly to himself, “Sam is a master at his craft.” He looked over at his son-in-law, who was relaxed and talking to both his brother-in-laws, Jim’s sons.

  Jim realized with a jolt that
the only time he ever spoke to his sons was when he advised them or lent them money. The thought made him sad. Parenting wasn’t meant to be lonely. Family was supposed to be about company.

  “You have a beautiful family, Jimmy,” Eve surprised him by appearing at his side. “When you and Mary moved to Canberra back in 1968, we were all proud of you for doing so well in your degree, and being chosen by Treasury but we thought you were moving to the end of the Earth.” Eve smiled at him, waving her glass of champagne at the setting in front of them. “But it’s a real city now and you have built this whole family here. You are one of the pioneers of this place, you and Mary. I couldn’t have done it.”

  “What do you mean?” Jim was disbelieving. “You went to Hong Kong!”

  “Yes, but Martin had family in Hong Kong – lots of family. You and Mary had no one in Canberra. You’d never lived anywhere other than Brisbane and no one from Queensland moved to Canberra in those days – everyone here was from Melbourne or Sydney.”

  Jim was surprised that his sister was so well informed of the original Canberran mix but he knew if he questioned her knowledge he would appear patronizing, so he just basked in her appreciation.

  She continued. “You’re only 50 years old; you have kept your family together; you are already a grandfather, and you have all these grown up people who regard you as the head of the family. It’s a big accomplishment, Jim.” Eve raised her glass to her big brother. “Your dream has come to fruition.”

  Jim laughed at the irony. “Oh, Eve, if you only knew,” he said, shaking his head.

  But Eve stopped him. “No, Jimmy, don’t give me the big sob story about how it all really is. Who cares? You don’t care! They don’t care! If the world ended tomorrow, right now you’d be happy, am I right?”

  Jim hadn’t thought of that before. “I suppose so,” he smiled.

  “”Course you would,” said Eve. She clinked her glass against his and said “Christmas in Canberra.”

  “Christmas in Canberra.” Jim clinked her back.

  *

  Meanwhile, back at the rangehood, a matriarchal manifesto of major proportions was underway. Eve sensed something, so she suggested that Jim join his sons and she sidled over to the clutch of women.

  “I can’t believe you are going to have it!” Roxanne said to Marie, as though she was announcing the winner of the chook raffle. “If it was me, I’d get rid of it.”

  Jane blinked back her shock but couldn’t speak. She looked at Marie and seriously wondered if the day was going to turn violent.

  “So would I,” added Mary.

  “Well, why didn’t you?” Marie demanded. “You were only 18 – 2 years younger than I am now when you got pregnant.”

  “I was married,” answered Mary.

  “No you weren’t,” Marie answered strongly.

  “I was engaged,” Mary was red and angry now.

  “You were still only 18 and not married. Why didn’t you have an abortion?”

  “How dare you speak to me like that!” Mary was shaking with rage.

  “Oh – so it’s OK for Roxanne to speak to me like that, but it’s not OK for me to speak to you the same way? Oh – I see!”

  “My baby was wanted,” Mary spat at Marie.

  “My baby is wanted too – by me.”

  “And me,” Jane could be silent no longer.

  “Oh well,” Roxanne shrugged, “at least Marie can always rely on Jim to pay her bills.”

  Eve laughed – or guffawed is probably a better description. She turned to Roxanne. “From what I hear, you haven’t done too badly out of Jim either, Roxanne,” she said.

  “I have never taken a cent from Jim and Mary!” Roxanne responded indignantly.

  “No – but you’ve benefitted when Michael has bled them dry!”

  “That’s got nothing to do with me.”

  But Eve was having none of it. “Oh yes it does, Roxanne. Jim paid off Michael’s credit card – the major expense on which was a holiday to Daydream Island taken not by Jim; not by Michael – by you!”

  “I never asked Jim to pay that bill.”

  “No, but you were happy to run it up knowing that you had no income to pay it yourself. And it isn’t just the credit card – what about the car?”

  Roxanne was becoming flustered. She looked from Eve to Mary and back to Eve. Mary remained silent. “Jim gave Michael that car.”

  “No, Roxanne – Jim tells me that he gave Michael the car a year ago in return for a promise that he would be paid $2,000 but Michael never paid him.”

  “It isn’t worth $2,000.”

  Mary could remain silent no longer. “It isn’t now – since you have put so many kilometres on it, driving it back and forth to Lake Cargelligo, and not had it serviced. But it was worth that much when it was handed over! And if Michael didn’t think so, he shouldn’t have agreed to pay us $2,000 for it.”

  “That’s not my affair.”

  “But you’re the one who drives it?”

  “My husband gave it to me!”

  Mary just shook her head and grimaced. “Well I’m glad that’s how you feel about it Roxanne, because it will make me feel a lot better about what I’ve had to do.”

  “What’s that, Mum?” Louise asked, thinking that this probably had something to do with the conversation they had had at Gus’s.

  “I’ve taken action which will mean that Jim can no longer slip Michael money whenever he feels like it. I’ve transferred all Jim’s assets into a discretionary Family Trust. Money can only be re-allocated upon the signature of all three trustees – Me, Jim and Louise.” Louise almost choked on her drink.

  “Sorry, Louise, I was going to tell you,” Mary conceded. “You don’t mind, do you?”

  “No, sure, I don’t mind. I’m just surprised.”

  “I had to be you,” Mary said.

  “Why Louise?” asked Roxanne.

  “Because Louise is the only one we have never had to lend any money to,” answered Mary.

  “Only because she doesn’t have a life,” said Roxanne.

  “I have a life!” Louise retorted.

  “Oh yeah, I totally forgot – the life of a spinster public servant. I’ll bet that really runs up the bills.”

  But Mary wasn’t finished. She sensed that the New Order had arrived, and she wasn’t part of it. This Christmas lunch at Jane’s was an indication of what the future held. The baton had been passed without her realizing it. All at once, and without warning, Mary and Jim had been sidelined from “head of the family” status to an almost irrelevant position. Her home would become “Nana’s house” just as her mother’s home had been, when she was young and had babies. She and Jim would wait for invitations, and be available when people called on them. They already provided babysitting so that Jane and Roxanne could do things together – things Mary was not invited to because that would mean no babysitter. And they also provided interest-free, no-obligation-to-repay loans so that holidays could be had – but not by Mary. She wasn’t invited to those either. The most they could hope for now was to maintain a position of respect, and perhaps enough of their own money to have an independent lifestyle like the one her children were enjoying.

  And Mary realized that if she and Jim were to play any part in the future of the expanding Keats clan other than as child minders and financial backers, she would have lay down some ground rules, right now.

  She turned to Jane.

  “Jane, the house looks lovely and I am sorry that all this has to be brought up after you have gone to so much trouble. I know from experience how many weeks of planning you have put into today. But I have to say this now. It effects everyone.” Mary then turned back to Roxanne.

  “I don’t care what bills any of you run up, Roxanne – just so long as Jim and I don’t end up paying them. And don’t say they aren’t your bills. That’s a cop out. How would you feel if Jim borrowed money from Michael and didn’t pay it back and then I went on a glamourous holiday while you sat at
home because you couldn’t afford to go away? How would you feel if Jim took Michael’s car – a car you had planned to sell for thousands of dollars so you could re-carpet the house – and never paid you for it? Would you say ‘Oh, that’s between Michael and his father; it’s got nothing to do with me!’ Of course you wouldn’t! You’d be screaming the place down about how you’d been cheated and how we owed you money.”

  “Well, hasn’t this turned out to be a lovely Christmas!” Roxanne sighed and touched her stomach. “I think I’d better go,” Roxanne could see no way back to the high ground. “I can’t be spoken to this way in my condition.”

  “In that case – I might stay after all!” Louise smiled her brightest smile.

  “Good!” said Eve.

  “I’ll go and get Michael to drive you home, Roxanne,” offered Louise.

  “Jim!” Mary called as she walked towards her husband. “Can you move the car? Roxanne isn’t feeling well and Michael is going to drive her home.”

  “Oh, sorry love,” Michael jumped up from his seat and walked over, looking at his wife apologetically. “Aren’t you feeling well? I can’t drive you anywhere – I’ve been drinking."

  “I’ll drive myself home then,” Roxanne was sure that this statement would cause everyone to worry about her.

  “Oh, OK,” said Michael, giving her a kiss on the cheek. On the one hand, he thought it odd that Roxanne should miss Christmas dinner; but on the other, he had long since given up second-guessing his wife’s actions and he knew better than to question her decision in front of anyone, if at all. “I’ll get Mum and Dad to drop me home straight after lunch. Have a nice rest! I’ll bring you back some Christmas pood!”

  But Jane was too soft-hearted to carry it off. “Or, Roxanne, you could just take a nap up in our room.”

  Roxanne was blinking away tears as she looked gratefully at Jane.

  Michael quickly agreed. “That’s a better idea. Why don’t you do that? Lunch won’t be for an hour and that will give you time to rest. You might feel better by then.”

  “Alright then,” agreed Roxanne. Gone was the confident woman and now Roxanne seemed tired and confused. “I don’t think I’m well enough to drive,” and she let Jane lead her upstairs to her bedroom.