The Taming of the Vamp

by Jaye Wells

  By eight o’clock, however, I was having second thoughts. Kira and Miranda had each invited a few vamp ladies from their social circle. I didn’t really know any of them.

  But they knew me.

  News of my punishment had spread through the gossip mill like wildfire. Miranda had warned me about it before the shower, but I’d shrugged it off, thinking everyone would be so focused on Syd it wouldn’t matter. I couldn’t have been more wrong.

  It started the minute the guests began to arrive. Lydia Abernathy and Helen Mariades, two ladies from Kira’s book group, were effusive in their compliments to Syd. However, when I approached them to thank them for coming, they literally turned their backs on me. I was left standing there with a rapidly receding smile and my hand extended.

  Knowing most vampires were big supporters of my father’s agenda, I shook the incident off.

  Miranda had seen what happened, though.

  “Ignore them,” she advised, taking my arm and leading me back into the fray.

  She stayed by my side as everyone else arrived, making sure to introduce me. I appreciated her support, but it couldn’t hide the chilly reception I got from most of the attendees.

  After everyone arrived we played the requisite bridal shower game—with a twist. Unfortunately, trying to get a group of women who averaged at least three hundred years in age excited about pin the fangs on the groom was tough.

  Sydney didn’t seem to care, though. When we brought out the cardboard cutout of Logan wearing a tux, she giggled. Even though some of the other ladies weren’t enthusiastic, Jorge, Geraldine, Miranda, and I played it up. Jorge won, but I think he cheated so he could win the spa gift certificate prize.

  After Jorge stopped jumping up and down, I went to the center of the room and tapped a fork on my flute of Lifeblood.

  “Ladies, if I can have your attention,” I said, pausing to give everyone a chance to finish their conversations. “It’s time for Sydney to open her presents.”

  Everyone seemed excited as they took their seats. Miranda lead Syd to the seat of honor in the circle of chairs. Sydney had no idea that the guests had been instructed to buy gifts related to the romance theme. Miranda and I figured that two vampires didn’t really need the traditional china and crystal, so we thought we’d stock Syd up on naughty lingerie and other naughty gifts.

  Sitting opposite from Syd, I prepared to record each item as she opened it. Plus I wanted a good view of her reactions to her presents.

  The first gift was from Miriam Duchamp, a former courtesan from Paris. She was one of Kira’s friends, and while she had not snubbed me like the others, she’d been a bit of a snob when we were introduced.

  As Syd pulled the crimson satin sheets from the gift bag, a brief flicker of shock passed over her features. Quickly schooling her expression, Syd graciously thanked Miriam.

  Biting back a smile, I wrote down the information for Syd to use for thank you notes. Miriam caught my eye and winked. I smiled back, instantly forgiving her earlier coldness. Anyone who’d give a bride satin sheets couldn’t be too bad.

  Jorge’s gift was second. When she opened the box, she blushed clear to her hairline. She cleared her throat and quickly closed the box. But since everyone was in on the joke, they demanded she show what she’d received.

  Her face flaming, she stole a glance at Kira.

  “Well, it appears to be an assortment of . . . items one might use in the bedroom,” she said.

  Jorge had surpassed subtle, giving Syd a sex-toy gift pack from Naughty Notions, a local sex shop.

  “Sydney, there’s no need to be shy. I might be your future mother-in-law, but I know a vibrator when I see one,” Kira said, causing the room to burst into laughter.

  Soon, Syd relaxed and enjoyed showing off her naughty gifts. The variety was mind-boggling: books on Kama Sutra and Tantric sex; a naughty board game; a gift basket filled with flavored massage oils, edible underwear, and handcuffs; several pieces of lingerie in every color and style imaginable; and his-and-hers blindfolds.

  Everyone was having a great time, even the older ladies. Some of them even started debating the merits of cherry-flavored massage oil versus mint. For the record, mint won because it “added a nice tingling sensation,” according to Miriam.

  Kira was the only one who whose gift didn’t go with the theme.

  “I thought since you missed Logan’s first four centuries, you might like to have some of the memorabilia I’ve collected over the years,” she said as Syd unwrapped the gift.

  The box contained a large photo album, which Kira explained held photos of Logan’s life, including anecdotes from times before cameras were invented.

  Syd jumped up and hugged her soon-to-be mother in law. There wasn’t a dry eye in the place by the time they were done.

  As touched as I was by the scene, part of me felt jealous that Kira welcomed Sydney so easily into her family. I knew if Callum and I were dating, she wouldn’t be so thrilled. Not that we were dating, but still. It was the principle of the matter.

  I was so lost in my thoughts that Miranda had to remind me that Syd had one more gift to open. Jumping out of my seat, I ran to the foyer and retrieved the box I’d hidden there earlier.

  “This is from me,” I said, feeling a little sheepish.

  Her eyes widened when she saw the huge package I placed on the floor in front of her.

  “Uh-oh. After everything else, I’m afraid too see what you came up with,” she joked.

  Because my gift followed Kira’s sentimental one, I was glad I had decided to forgo the naughty gifts everyone else had favored.

  Syd tore at the paper, revealing a plain cardboard box. Opening the flaps, she dug through mounds of tissue. My nerves started to get the best of me as I worried whether she’d like it. Giving gifts was a new thing for me, and I’d agonized for days about what to buy her.

  She pulled out the brown leather overnight bag and shot me a confused look.

  “Open it,” I said, smiling.

  As she unzipped it, the room was quiet as everyone waited in anticipation.

  She dug around in the bag and withdrew a bottle of champagne, a mix CD I’d made of romantic music, and an envelope. She opened it and gasped.

  “Oh, Raven, you shouldn’t have!” she exclaimed. “She’s booked us for a week at the Inn on Biltmore Estate in Asheville!”

  All eyes swiveled to me in shock. I guess everyone was surprised I could come up with a decent gift.

  “You said you didn’t have honeymoon plans yet, so I figured this might take some of the pressure off you,” I said with a shrug. “I also booked you guys for a couple’s massage at the spa.”

  The inn was located on the grounds of the historic Biltmore Estate, a famous home once owned by the Vanderbilt family. The property was nestled into the Blue Ridge Mountains, a popular spot for romantic getaways.

  Syd moved so fast I barely saw her, almost knocking me down as she hugged me.

  “Thank you so much!” she whispered as she squeezed me tight.

  “It’s no big deal,” I said, hugging her back.

  She sniffed, and I knew the tears were coming.

  “Hey, don’t go crying all over me. This shirt is new,” I said, trying to lighten things up before I began crying too.

  She pulled away but remained at my side as she chatted with the other guests about the gift. I felt embarrassed to be the focus of so much attention, so I quickly signaled for the waiter to bring in the cake.

  As everyone dug into the chocolate confection, Kira approached me.

  “Raven, you did a wonderful job pulling this together for Sydney. I know it means a lot to her,” she said, smiling at me.

  “You and Hannah did a lot of the work,” I said, brushing off her compliment.

  “You did most of it. And that gift! It was so thoughtful of you to think of that for them. I have to admit I was skeptical about you being a bridesmaid at first. But I was wrong,” she said. “In fact, I’m starting
to think I was wrong about a lot of things where you’re concerned.”

  My mouth dropped open in shock.

  “Kira, I don’t know what to say.”

  “You don’t have to say anything. Your actions have shown me everything I need to know.”

  She patted me on the arm and went to get some cake. I stood there grinning stupidly for a few minutes before Miranda came to see what was going on.

  “What was all that about?” she asked.

  I shook my head to clear it. “She complimented me on the shower,” I said, not ready to discuss the rest of what Kira had said.

  “Well, you deserve it. I know Sydney had a great time.”

  “If you think this was great, just wait until we start the bachelorette portion of the evening.”

  Miranda laughed. “It’s a good thing Callum and Alaric agreed to do the bachelor party tonight too. I have a feeling it’s going to be a long night.”

  “Callum agreed to confiscate Logan’s cell phone so he can’t check in,” I said. “Knowing him, he’d blow the surprise.”

  “Oh, come on. He’s not that bad,” she said.

  I shot her a skeptical look.

  “Anyway,” she said, “where are we going? I can’t believe you wouldn’t let me help with the bachelorette plans too.”

  “You’ll just have to wait and find out with everyone else.”

  “Are you this much of a tease with Callum, too?” she asked.

  Quickly glancing around to be sure no one heard her, I elbowed her in the arm.

  “Hush! No one is supposed to know about that, remember? Besides, we both know when it comes to teases you hold the title.”

  She huffed in indignation. “I do not!”

  “Oh, yeah? Who’s the born-again virgin?”

  She crossed her arm and scowled at me. “I am not, and you know it.”

  “You might as well be. It’s been what? A century and a half since you slept with that pirate guy. What was his name again?”

  “Captain Nick Slade was not a pirate. He was a privateer. And our affair was three centuries ago, give or take.”

  “Sure. A privateer who slept with you and then shipped out without saying good-bye,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Didn’t he also abscond with several pieces of your jewelry?”

  “It’s not nice to tease me about that, you know. I was heartbroken for a decade,” she said. “Besides, there have been other men since him.”

  “Name one,” I challenged.

  She thought for a moment. “Vladimir from Kiev.”

  “That’s right. Wasn’t he the gambler who had to skip town to avoid his creditors?”

  “Yes, but he was very romantic when he wasn’t drunk.”

  “Who else?”

  “Pierre DuMonde, the count from Paris.”

  “You mean the one who claimed the French Revolution left his noble family impoverished. Didn’t he borrow money from you and then disappear?”

  “Yes,” she admitted. “Now you see why I swore off men. Since I had terrible taste, why bother?”

  “You make a good point,” I said.

  Since I’d been with my fair share of assholes, I could relate to her sentiment. With Callum, though, I had the perfect setup. No strings and no expectations. Although, I had warned him that if he came home reeking of cheap stripper perfume, there’d be hell to pay. But who could blame me for that? While this thing between us lasted, he was going to be a one-woman vampire—or else.

  The guests had finished their cake and were starting to gather their things. For a few minutes the room was a flurry of hugs and chatter.

  “Raven, I just wanted to thank you for putting together such a lovely shower,” one of the earlier snubbers said.

  Her friend nodded eagerly. “It’s the best shower we’ve been to in decades.”

  Shocked that they went out of their way to compliment me, I smiled graciously.

  “Thank you so much for coming. We’ll see you both at the wedding?”

  “Yes, we’re looking forward to it. Sydney will make a lovely bride, and that Logan is quite a catch.”

  I thanked them again and showed them to the door. The rest of the guests had similar nice things to say as they left. As Kira finished seeing everyone off, I walked back into the sitting room.

  Dropping onto a nearby chair, I felt proud of myself. This was the first time I’d done something unselfish in a long time. Glancing at Syd, who was chatting with Jorge and Miranda, I was happy she’d enjoyed herself.

  I also felt as if I’d passed some kind of test. As if I proved to everyone I was more than a troublemaker.

  Kira came in after everyone left.

  “Well, that was fun,” she said, walking over to Syd. “However, it’s time for this old woman to turn in.”

  We all chuckled. Callum’s mom looked younger than most of us.

  “Thank you so much, Kira. I had a wonderful time,” Syd said, giving the woman a hug.

  “Raven did most of the work. Thank her.”

  Her praise shouldn’t have meant as much as it did. But I wasn’t going to analyze it. The night was young, and there was still more fun to be had. I wasn’t going to let my brain stand in the way of enjoying myself.

  Kira said goodnight to everyone and left, winking at me on her way out. She was in on the bachelorette plan, so her exit was prearranged.

  “Raven, thank you so much for everything,” Syd said, coming to my side. “This was so much fun.”

  “Looks like you got enough stuff to open your own sex shop,” I said, surveying her gifts.

  She laughed. “Yeah, I think Logan will be quite pleased with the haul. I wish we could try some of the stuff out tonight, but he’ll probably be too drunk after the bachelor outing.”

  I caught my cohorts’ eyes, letting them know it was time to let the cat out of the bag. They came over and stood behind me.

  “Actually, you’ll probably be pretty drunk yourself,” I said causally.

  “What?” she asked, looking at each of us curiously.

  “Girlfriend, we’re going out!” Jorge announced.

  “Sydney Worth, it’s time for your bachelorette party!” Miranda said, holding up the bag of surprises I’d assembled before the shower.

  Syd’s mouth dropped open. “You guys didn’t have to do this!”

  “Oh, yes we did! You can’t get married until you’ve been embarrassed in public,” Geraldine said.

  “Yay!” Syd said, obviously getting into the spirit.

  I grabbed the first item out of the bag. The black T-shirt had “Bride” written on the front in red rhinestones.

  “Oh my God, I love it,” Syd said, giggling as she took it from me. She slipped it on right over her black wrap dress.

  Next, I pulled out a length of black tulle. Syd laughed when she saw it was no normal veil.

  “Miranda made this especially for tonight,” I said, placing it on Sydney’s head. The black material fell just below her shoulders. Little penis charms and condoms were attached with red satin ribbons.

  Syd ran to the mirror in the foyer and laughed at her reflection. “I look like the slutty bride of Dracula!”

  “If the shoe fits, girl,” Jorge said, winking at her.

  “But wait, that’s not all,” I said, digging into the bag again. “I also got a little something for the rest of us to wear.”

  Out came four black feather boas and one red one.

  As I passed them out, I said, “The black ones are for us and the red one is for Syd.”

  “I’ve always wanted a black boa!” Jorge said as he flipped the end of his over his shoulder with a flourish.

  The doorbell rang, signaling the arrival of the limo.

  Miranda went to get the door as I explained the plan for the evening.

  “Everyone listen up. Our first stop is the Black Widow for a few cocktails,” I said, referring to a local vamp bar. “Then it’s off to the Karaoke Krypt.”

  “Raven, I hate to be a wet bl
anket,” said Geraldine. “But is it okay for us to go to vampire bars?”

  I waved away her concern. “You’ll be fine. These are Brethren establishments, so they’re pretty mortal friendly. Okay, everyone ready?”

  As we made our way outside to the stretch Hummer limo, Syd pulled me aside.

  “Raven, thank you. This means so much to me,” she said.

  “You may not be thanking me in the morning.”

  “Hey, I’m a vampire. We don’t get hangovers,” Syd said with a laugh.

  “I wasn’t talking about the liquor.”

  “Oh?” she asked, looking nervous. “You’re not going to get me in trouble with Logan are you?”

  “Nah. But I do plan on embarrassing the shit out of you. Be prepared. You will be singing karaoke before the night’s over.”

  I pulled a camera out of my bag.

  “There will be photographic evidence.”

  She laughed. “Hey, wait. There isn’t a chance we’ll run into the guys, is there?”

  Shaking my head, I said, “Nope. Callum assured me they were hitting a vamp club in Chapel Hill.”

  “Good. I’d hate for Logan to hear me doing karaoke. He might call off the wedding.”

  We both laughed and loaded into the monster limo. The interior had neon lights running along the ceiling and behind the two long leather benches that spanned the length of the vehicle. Our driver, Lance, was a vampire who specialized in vampire events. Thus, he had cold bagged blood chilling in ice buckets along with bottles of champagne and beer.

  “Okay, people,” he said before he closed the window connecting the driver’s area from the back. “Who’s ready to have fun?”

  “We are!” we all shouted in unison.

  He laughed and hit a switch, closing the window. Within seconds, the Hummer was on the move with ABBA’s “Dancing Queen” blasting from the speakers.

  Watching everyone sing along, I couldn’t help but smile. For the first time in a long time, I felt like I belonged.

  Jorge leaned over and put his arm around me as he handed me a recently opened bottle of champagne. “Drink up,” he shouted.

  I chugged down some bubbly goodness, avoiding the errant feathers of my boa.