by Katie Knight
He was the first man she’d allowed herself to be attracted to since Theo’s death and it scared her silly. She couldn’t risk losing her job. She couldn’t risk getting her heart broken again. She couldn’t seem to stop herself from wanting him anyway.
They stopped near the bottom of the steps leading up to the huge seated figure of Abraham Lincoln and stared down the length of the mall toward the gleaming white obelisk of the Washington Monument, the red safety lights blinking near the peak.
“No. Never been married.” Jed gave a slight shrug, his tone quiet and contemplative. “At first, I was too busy. Always traveling with my SEAL team, never knowing where I’d be next or if I’d live to see another day. Then when I retired and became a civilian again, I started my security firm and put myself right back in the line of fire. Doesn’t really seem fair to put a partner through that, you know?”
Tess had never really thought about it like that, but he had a point, she supposed. They walked over to a nearby bench and sat. “Sounds awfully lonely, though.”
“Eh, it’s fine.” He leaned back and stared up at the stars, stretching his arms out along the back of the bench. His fingers brushed her bare shoulder and made her shiver. Jed glanced over at her and frowned, then stood and shrugged out of his sport coat before wrapping it around her shoulders. His scent surrounded her, and though she wasn’t cold, Tess found herself snuggling into his secondhand warmth anyway. “I’m so busy right now I don’t really have time to devote to a relationship anyway,” Jed continued. “Just as well since I’m not very good at them. Flings are fine. Less messy and demanding than long-term relationships. Besides, until I can find Nala a permanent home, I want to set a good example for her.”
Frowning, Tess tilted her head. “You aren’t going to adopt Nala?”
“What?” Jed gave her some serious side-eye. “No. She needs stability and I can’t give her that right now. Maybe not ever. I’m not fit to be a parent, no matter how much I might want kids one day.”
The sadness underlying the words tugged at her heart, making her chest ache. “For what it’s worth, I think you make a great dad.”
He looked at her then, his pale blue eyes narrowed. His gaze flickered down to her lips. Heat prickled her cheeks under his intense scrutiny, but she refused to look away. The connection she’d felt between them since the first day she’d walked into Jed’s house sizzled hotter, but she did her best to resist the urge to lean in and kiss him, to see if he tasted as delicious as he looked. It wouldn’t be right. It wouldn’t be proper.
It wouldn’t be in her best interests, especially if he rejected her.
After all, he’d given her no indication he returned her attraction.
Given how out of practice she was with all this, she had no idea how to gauge his interest. Theo had been very up front with his feelings for her. Jed was a puzzle wrapped in an enigma.
“Thanks for saying that,” Jed said at last, looking away and exhaling slow. “But I can’t do that to her. She deserves a stable, loving home where she’s the center of her parents’ world. While I love her and would do anything for the kid, I’ve got other obligations too. And I’m a single guy. Most adoption agencies prefer couples, I think.”
Tess stared down at her hands in her lap, clutching her tiny black evening bag. “Maybe you won’t always be single though.”
The minute the words were out of her mouth, she cringed. Such a stupid thing to say. The last thing she wanted was for him to think she was trying to flirt with him. He’d made it clear this wasn’t a date. She was his employee, Nala’s nanny and tutor. This wasn’t some romance novel where the spinster and the handsome lord fell in love and lived happily ever after. This was real life, with real complications and real emotions and real stakes on the line.
He didn’t say anything for a long moment, increasing her anxiety. Finally, Jed shifted to face her, his expression unreadable. “Look, Tess. I like you. More than I should. But I’m not a good bet, okay?”
More than I should.
Despite her wishes to the contrary, his hint at more than platonic feelings toward her sent a thrill through her system. Before she could second guess her actions, Tess reached over and placed her hand over his on his thigh. “Jed, you’re smart and funny and gorgeous and strong, and regardless of what you think, you’ll make some woman an excellent husband someday.”
Jed blinked at her several times then smiled, slow and sexy. “You think I’m gorgeous?”
She bit back a laugh. Of course, of all the things she’d said, leave it to a man to pick that one. “You know you are. Don’t deny it. The way you swagger around the house and carry yourself.”
It was his turn to laugh. “I do not swagger. And maybe if a certain nanny didn’t sneak around all quiet like and surprise a guy when he was coming out of the shower, she wouldn’t get a free peep show either.”
Her eyes widened, and her cheeks flamed hotter. Oh God. Now all she could see was him standing there in nothing but a towel. All that tanned, toned, muscled flesh just begging for her touch, for her to lick and kiss and taste him and….
“Sorry.” He took her hand from where it still rested atop his and twined their fingers together. “I promised myself I wouldn’t flirt with you tonight or touch you. But seeing you in that outfit, all sinful curves and wicked sweet smile, is putting all my willpower to the test.”
Tess gave herself a mental high-five glad that she’d made the last minute decision to wear the LBD but her silent kudos stuttered to a halt at the stroke of his thumb against her palm, circling slowly, making her breath catch and her pulse race.
Mouth dry, she swallowed hard and searched for some topic that would steer them into safer territory and away from temptation. “I’ve had these clothes forever. I bought it for….”
Yikes. She stopped herself before she blurted out Theo’s name, but just barely. Jed didn’t need to know that she’d purchased them for an anniversary dinner with Theo. But from the way Jed stilled beside her, she didn’t have to say it.
“I’m sorry about what happened, with him,” he said, his voice lower, rougher. His thumb continued to stroke her skin, lulling her into relaxation. Jed was staring straight ahead, out over the reflecting pool, as if he wasn’t really even aware of what he was doing. “It’s hard to let go of the past. Believe me, I know. It marks you, changes you, makes you into the person you are today.”
Tess felt an irresistible urge to cuddle closer to his side, to offer comfort for hurts she knew nothing about yet sensed in his tone. She inched closer to him, the heat from their joined hands sending sparks of awareness up her arm and through her body.
“I like the person you are,” she whispered.
“You do?” He faced her again, much closer now than she’d anticipated. Close enough for his warm breath to fan her face and stir the hair near her temples. She couldn’t seem to stop staring at his lips, wondering if they felt as firm and soft as they appeared. His mouth moved toward hers, closer, closer, until his lips brushed hers once, twice, before capturing her lips in a kiss.
Her eyes fluttered closed and she lifted her free hand to rest on his chest, right over his heart. It was pounding as hard as hers. He moaned low and she gasped in response. He took advantage of her parted lips, deepening the kiss to taste her. His tongue slipped between her lips, his flavor spicy with garlic and sweet from the wine. She felt herself sliding further into serious like with him, the warm, sweet ache in her chest nearly unbearable. She wanted to turn and climb into his lap and stay snuggled in his arms forever. She wanted to take control of the kiss and do all the naughty things she’d been fantasizing about since seeing him after his shower. She wanted this never to stop.
Then a persistent buzz interrupted their fantasy.
Jed cursed under his breath and sat back, pulling out his cell phone to answer a call. He glanced over at her and mouthed the word sorry.
She sat back and shook her head. She understood he couldn’t afford to ignore a
call—not when it might be about Nala. He’d given the sitter his number before they left the house. She just hoped something hadn’t happened to the girl.
From the way his soft expression gradually darkened into a scowl, the news wasn’t good. “What the hell do you mean? Let me talk to the cops.”
“Cops?” Tess said, her heart tripping now for entirely different reasons. “What’s wrong? What’s happened?”
Jed held up a finger for her to wait, then stood, pacing back and forth in front of the bench as he spoke in murmured tones she couldn’t quite catch to the police on the other end of the line. Tess was able to pick out the words “intruder” and “secure,” but that was about it. Finally, he ended the call and took a deep breath, staring out at the reflecting pool with his hands on his hips for a long moment before turning to face her. “Someone tried to break into the house and attack Nala. The police are there now and everything’s secure. The sitter is obviously upset and Nala is scared out of her wits.”
“Who would do that?” Tess asked, pushing to her feet as well and handing the sport coat back to Jed. He slipped it on and she felt a momentary pang of regret that their kiss was over even though she knew the situation with Nala was way more important.
“Why would someone want to take an eleven-year-old girl?” She shuddered at what the answer might be. Sex trafficking rings had become all too prevalent in the area over the last couple of years, and the thought of Nala getting abducted into that life was horrible. “You don’t think….”
“I don’t know what to think at the moment.” He took her hand and began walking back toward their car in the restaurant parking lot, his steps much faster than before. “All I know is that Nala needed me and I wasn’t there to protect her.”
“You can’t blame yourself for that,” Tess said, stumbling along after him as he tugged her forward. “There’s no way you could’ve known what would happen tonight. And you said she’s okay, right?”
“For now.” They reached his SUV and he clicked the doors open with his key fob. The lights flashed on and off as they climbed inside. Jed started the engine and backed out in a squeal of tires, then sighed and stopped, glancing over at Tess. “I’m sorry about how things ended back there on the bench, but Nala means everything to me.”
“I know.” Tess pointed out the windshield. “Go. She needs us now.”
15
“Has anyone gotten some answers yet as to what the hell happened?” Jed asked as he and Tess rushed into the house. To say he’d found the sea of squad cars with lights blazing parked outside on his quiet suburban street unsettling would’ve been the understatement of the millennium. Worse was knowing why they were there. All of it brought back a rush of fear and vulnerability from his childhood. His heart jackhammered against his chest and his mouth dried to sandpaper. He spotted Nala across the room with the sitter, tears streaking her cheeks, and he immediately ran to her and knelt on the floor beside her, hugging her tightly and rocking her slowly while she cried. The scared little boy he’d been back then would’ve given anything to have someone show him this kindness. He couldn’t change the past, but he sure as hell could make sure Nala had all the support she needed for the future.
“We’re currently investigating the situation, sir,” one of the detectives said. He had on an ill-fitting brown suit and wrinkled white shirt with a coffee stain in the middle of his light blue tie. The last name listed on the badge he held out to Jed was Davidson. “I’d like to ask you a few questions, if you don’t mind.”
Nala clung to him, her tears wetting his shirt and sport coat, but he couldn’t have cared less. “I do mind but go ahead.”
“Have you seen anyone suspicious lurking around the neighborhood lately? Or can you think of any reason why someone might target your home in particular for invasion?”
Not wanting to discuss his private investigation in front of Nala and traumatize the poor girl any more than she’d already been, Jed carefully extracted her arms from around his neck and gently handed her back to the sitter. Nala would be happier with Tess, he knew, but he needed Tess to stay and be a part of his conversation with the police. “Don’t worry, baby. I’m here, and I’ll never let anything bad happen to you again. Understand?”
Sniffling, Nala nodded.
“Good.” Jed kissed her forehead then handed her over to the sitter. “Go into the kitchen with Bonnie. She’ll get you some water and a cookie. I’ll be in, too, in a minute.” He looked up at the sitter who looked ready to pass out. “And maybe Bonnie needs a drink herself. There’s a bottle of Jameson in the cupboard beside the sink.”
The sitter gave him a tremulous smile then led the little girl away.
Tess moved in beside him as he straightened, and he introduced her to the detective. “Tessa Frederick, this is Detective Davidson. Tess is Nala’s new nanny-slash-tutor.”
The detective gave a cursory nod then pulled out a small notepad and pen. “Can you answer my questions, sir?”
“Right.” Jed scrubbed a hand over the top of his buzzcut hair, then squinted around the room. From what he could see from the damage path, it looked like the intruders had busted in through the front door then charged straight forward, knocking over the end table in the foyer and making a beeline into the living room, where the sitter and Nala had been watching TV. Canned laughter from the sitcom on screen still filled the air, in eerie contrast to the seriousness of the moment. Pictures and papers and a few of Nala’s books were scattered around the floor, and her glass of juice had spilled onto the coffee table, likely kicked over when she’d struggled against the men who’d broken in.
Jesus.
Someone had broken into his home and tried to take his eleven-year-old ward.
Having been through enough combat to last him twenty lifetimes, Jed recognized the early warning signs of shock settling into his body and took a deep breath to try to stave it off a bit longer. Tess stood next to him, unusually quiet. Her complexion was ghostly pale and her hands—which she kept wringing in front of her—were trembling. He wanted to hold her. He wanted to hold Nala. He wanted to get to the bottom of this whole fucking mess so that it never, ever happened again.
“Uh, yeah. Nala and Tess said they saw a guy the other day while they were out walking to the park,” Jed said, glad his steady, calm voice didn’t betray any of the raging chaos inside him. He glanced over at Tess. “He was bald. Leather jacket?”
She nodded. “At the time I didn’t think anything of it, but later Nala told me that he reminded her of a man she saw in the driveway the night before her parents died.”
Detective Davidson glanced up from the pad he was scribbling on. “Yeah. I remember that case. Too bad about what happened.”
“Do you think the two are related?” Jed asked, his mind whirling at two-hundred miles per hour. It all seemed far too coincidental for all these things to happen so close together, and Jed had learned a long time ago not to believe in coincidence. Everything had to be tied together somehow. He rushed to the office and grabbed the drawing Nala had done and brought it back to the living room to hand to Davidson. “This is the guy Nala saw hanging around near her parents’ car the night before they died.”
The cop snorted at the crayon rendition then handed it back to Jed. “Could be.” He jotted down a few more notes on his pad before shoving it and the pen back into his pocket. “I’ll get with the team investigating the accident and see what they think.”
“But it wasn’t an accident. They called me and told me the brake lines had been cut and the engine tampered with.” Jed glanced toward the kitchen door and lowered his voice. “What happened to that kid’s parents, my friends, was deliberate. Someone wanted them dead.”
Detective Davidson narrowed his gaze on Jed, silent for a few long moments. “Like I said, I’ll look into it and let you know what I find out, Mr. Tremayne. In the meantime, our CSI team is on the way to dust for prints and catalogue the area. Please don’t touch or move anything until they’
re done.”
Anger surged, overpowering the fear inside Jed. He clenched his fists and gritted his teeth, glaring at the cop. “I know how this works, detective. I’m a retired Navy SEAL and I own my own security business. Don’t treat me like a civilian.”
“No disrespect intended,” Davidson said, taking a step back with his hands up. “Just trying to do my job.”
Apparently, his job tonight was getting on Jed’s last nerve. Then again, he was a bit on edge. Needing to work off some of his excess energy, Jed stalked back down the hall to return Nala’s picture to his office. Much as he’d like to punch something, namely Detective Davidson’s smug face, he needed to keep it together for Tess and Nala.
His phone was blowing up in his pocket and he pulled it out with a sigh to see a screenful of texts from some of his SEAL buddies, the ones who were involved in police business—as cops themselves, or as volunteer firemen or journalists—and had police scanners. They had heard the radio call go out for Jed’s address. Forcing his tense shoulders to relax, he group texted back all of them that he was fine, Nala was fine, the house was intact and the cops were investigating.
He’d just hit Send when a soft knock came from the door. Tess stood there, still lovely as ever in her tiny black dress. Except her hazel eyes held a haunted, hunted look now, and he itched to pull her into his arms and bring back that passionate woman who’d kissed him until his toes curled on that bench in front of the Lincoln Memorial.
But now was not the time or the place. He needed to stay focused on the case in order to keep Tess and Nala safe. Giving into passion would be a distraction he couldn’t afford. Besides, shock and danger did funny things to people. Heightened the senses, blew emotions all out of proportion, made everything seem now or never. There was a reason why action/adventure movies were so popular for dating couples worldwide. They played into that life or death lizard-brain mentality all too well.
