Lethal Cruise: A Humorous Cruise Ship Cozy Mystery (Cruise Ship Cozy Mysteries Book 9)

by A. R. Winters

  “But I’d better head off too,” Sam said. “Good night, everyone! It was lovely to meet you all!”

  Sam and I headed toward the exit.

  “Dinner with Ethan?”

  “Yep. Late one. He was on duty until nine o’clock, but we’re going to grab some pizza. What are you up to?”

  Sam shrugged. “I’ll see what Cece’s up to. She’s always got something fun planned.”

  “She just bought a new dress to show off for Ryan. Tell her it looks nice.” I thought for a moment and then I smiled. “Tell her it makes her look very mature.”

  Chapter Seven

  I still had a few minutes to spare so I dropped by my cabin to swap my work blouse for a strappy white top that went well with my jeans. I checked my hair, poked at my makeup, and splashed on a little perfume.

  That would have to do.

  Shoving my phone into a little white handbag, I went to meet Ethan in the Grand Atrium.

  When I got there, he was waiting for me. He’d changed into slacks and a light-blue Oxford shirt that fit his frame almost as well as the models’ T-shirts had. Of course he was older than them. More distinguished. Much more my type.

  “Why are you smiling?”

  “Because I’m meeting you, of course!” I said with a grin, interlocking my arm with his.

  “Still want pizza?”

  “Sure.”

  Since it was getting late, we had planned on going to one of the ship’s casual, late-night eateries. The one we settled on was called Slice of New York and they specialized in Chicago-style deep dish. Just kidding. They served pizzas the size of manhole covers with a crispy-chewy crust and an aroma that made me think of soaring skyscrapers, steaming vents, and yellow cabs. Not that I’d ever been to New York, but I’d seen it enough on TV.

  “How was the beauty kickoff?”

  I shrugged. “You know. Lots of boring speeches. Kelly was on a roll, though. She made enough mistakes to keep me entertained.”

  “Sounds like I didn’t miss much. I was up on the bridge, showing the new Captain the ropes.”

  “Oh yeah? How’s he doing?”

  “Good, though I think I’ve been overwhelming him with information. He’s been jotting down everything I tell him, and I think he’s just about filled up his notebook already. He seems to be keeping himself busy.”

  “A million things to do?” I asked, mimicking one of Kelly’s popular refrains—when she wasn’t complaining about having a billion or a trillion, that is.

  “Yes, now that you mention it, I think he used that exact phrase.”

  It was only a short walk to the pizzeria. It had a neon sign outside, and the inside was all spartan plastic tables and chairs affixed to the floor, and a counter where we could order. Simple, clean, and pizza to die for. Not that there would be any dying happening on this cruise, I hoped.

  “What do you want?”

  “Couple of slices of pepperoni and a soda.”

  “Excellent choice, Addy. I’ll get the same.”

  There was no way we’d be able to manage a whole pizza; that would need a team of at least four people. And the good thing about the slices was that you didn’t have to wait any longer than it took them to reheat them in the oven, either.

  In moments we were sitting opposite each other at a plastic table, happily shoveling the best pizza within two hundred miles into our faces. Every bite was hot, crispy, and messy, and I soon piled up a small mountain of napkins from wiping the tasty sauce off my face.

  “How are the models?” Ethan asked.

  I gave him a suspicious look.

  “As fine as everyone else from what I can see. They seem nice.”

  “You were chatting with them?”

  “Tuff, Canyon, and I had a drink earlier,” I said, slightly exaggerating what had gone on. “I got to hear the fascinating stories of the origins of their names.”

  “Tuff and Canyon? Those are names?” Ethan shook his head.

  “Oh, yes,” I said ever so seriously. “They’re good, aren’t they? Strong and reassuring…” I let out a wistful sigh as if I was thinking about them.

  “What about Ethan?”

  “That’s a name too.” I took a sip from my soda, and then I couldn’t stop myself from laughing. “Are you jealous?”

  “Jealous? I don’t even know the meaning of the word,” he said with a grin. “Just teasing you.”

  “What? No way. I was teasing you.”

  “Then I guess we both win.”

  We both must have been hungry because we got through our pizza pretty quickly, chatting between mouthfuls about passengers and policies, ports and personnel, and the rest of the humdrum things that happen aboard a cruise ship. There was something of an unspoken agreement that we wouldn’t talk about our suspect list related to my kidnapping while in public places, so we stuck to normal conversation.

  “Want to go for a walk? I know a really nice deck around here.”

  We both knew there was a nice walking path that circumnavigated the ship just outside, since we’d been on it countless times before. The constitutional deck was particularly pleasant at night, since almost no one was ever out there.

  After cleaning up our dinner, we walked outside and began a leisurely stroll, hand in hand, close enough that our shoulders touched. That is, my shoulder touched his biceps—I would have to be wearing some crazy platform heels like Cece to go shoulder-to-shoulder with Ethan.

  “Cold?”

  “Nope, just right,” I said and leaned in a little closer. The night air was slightly crisp, and there was a light breeze, but nothing a country girl like me couldn’t handle.

  Outside, once we left the bustle of the busier areas of the ship behind, the only thing we could hear was the lapping of the water against the side of the ship, and the distant hum of the ship’s giant engines that I only heard when I searched for it. I’d worked there so long the engines were inaudible to me unless I listened for them.

  “Do you know what that is?” Ethan asked, pointing with his free hand up into the sky. I stared up. It was a constellation of some kind, but I didn’t know the name of it.

  “No?”

  “A star,” he said very seriously.

  There was a pause before I started laughing.

  “Man, you suck. Aren’t you sailors supposed to be able to navigate by them?”

  Ethan rubbed his chin. “I prefer to use the alternative ancient technique of electronic GPS, combined with asking a navigation officer.”

  Laughing together, we continued walking until Ethan stopped.

  A romantic moment?

  Nope.

  Ethan squeezed my hand and then pointed forward. I gazed back down at the deck instead of up at the night sky to see what he was pointing at. It was two people, a couple maybe.

  We continued walking in their direction. Although it looked like two people, there was no romance in the air around them. I did feel a sudden chill.

  As we got closer, the shadowy silhouettes became visible, and I recognized who it was. Leaning up against the railing was Nurse Jessie, and she didn’t look happy. Standing in front of her, in a pose that looked menacing, at least from our angle, was none other than the solo traveler Bruno Jones.

  Ethan became all business. Still holding my hand, he gave it another little warning squeeze and then marched over toward the couple with heavy footsteps, clearing his throat with a cough to draw attention as he did so.

  They both seemed startled to see us. As we approached, Bruno seemed to melt into the scenery behind him, and a smile appeared on his lips. Jessie pulled at the front of her dress as if pulling out creases and forced a smile of her own.

  “Good evening. I’m First Officer Ethan Lee, the head of security aboard this ship. Is everything okay?”

  “Wonderful!” Bruno said too loudly and with too much energy. His eyes were flickering with amusement.

  “Yes, fine thanks,” said Jessie. She was clearly trying to sound confident, but I c
ould hear a tremor in her voice. Everything obviously wasn’t fine.

  Ethan stood there staring at the pair of them, letting his intimidating gaze do all the work. It was Bruno who broke the silence.

  “Jessie, maybe you should go and get some rest and think things over, hmm?” Bruno clapped his hands together as if a decision had been made.

  “I… yes, I’m tired. I think I’ll call it a night.” I narrowed my eyes at her, trying to figure out what kind of mood she was in. Fearful? Angry? Confused?

  “Are you sure everything’s okay?” Ethan asked again in a reassuring voice, raising his eyebrows at Jessie and letting the strength of his tone indicate he could help her if she needed it.

  “Yes, I’m just tired. Lots to do tomorrow. I’ll be getting my first customers. Good night, everyone!”

  Nurse Jessie walked around Ethan and me, heading toward the nearest entrance to the ship.

  Bruno made as if to follow her. Ethan reached out and took him by the arm, smiling at him like a shark.

  “Have you had a good evening, sir?”

  Bruno paused, glancing down at his arm and then up again at Ethan, who stood a good half-head taller than him.

  “Oh, yes. We took a nice little walk out here. Some interesting conversation. I think I’ll head to the bar for a nightcap or two now, though.”

  Ethan let go of his arm and gave him a warning look, though his words were nothing but pleasant.

  “Glad to hear it. Enjoy the rest of your evening. If there’s anything I can do in my role as head of security, just let me know.”

  “Right. Well, thank you. Good night!”

  Bruno made a show of walking in the direction opposite the one Jessie took.

  “What do you make of that?”

  I sucked in a breath. “I don’t know. I know him, though. His name’s Bruno. I met him earlier.”

  “Do you think he’s going to be trouble?”

  “Maybe. He’s traveling alone, which is fine, but when he arrived he asked me if Nurse Jessie had arrived yet. Then, during her introduction, he asked her a weird question about accidentally killing beauty-treatment patients with an overdose. Now this.” I stared at the railing where they had been standing. “Whatever this was.”

  “It sounds like they must have some history, then. Perhaps they were a couple and it ended badly.”

  “Maybe,” I said doubtfully. “I’m not sure if Jessie actually knew who he was before today, though. I think he’s got it in for her for some reason.”

  “Don’t suppose you fancy a nightcap as well?” Ethan nodded his head after Bruno.

  I grabbed Ethan by the hand and squeezed it.

  “Sure. But tell me… is it really me you want to have that drink with? Or did Bruno just charm the pants off you?”

  Ethan laughed at that. “Come on. We don’t want him to get away.”

  We trailed Bruno to the ship’s cocktail bar, where he was sitting up at one end of the bar on a high barstool.

  “Come on,” said Ethan pulling me into one of the booths. “Let’s just watch him from here.”

  We sat down, and one of the cocktail waitresses appeared. Ethan ordered us a couple of martinis while he stared around the waitress at Bruno.

  I couldn’t help but be amused. Usually, Ethan was such a gentleman. He always asked me exactly what I wanted, never presuming to make decisions for me. But this time he’d ordered the drinks without even thinking, just to get the task over with as soon as possible. I knew it meant he was preoccupied.

  “He’s just drinking,” said Ethan, finally.

  “Is he?” I’d been watching him too, but I felt like Bruno was up to something more. “Actually, I think he keeps looking to his right. Didn’t you notice that?”

  Ethan frowned. From his position, he couldn’t see to the right of Bruno. I figured I could, if I leaned back in the booth and turned my head a bit. I did exactly that, and then blinked in surprise.

  “Huh, who would have thought…”

  “What?” Ethan sounded slightly irritated that he couldn’t see what I could.

  The waitress arrived with our drinks, and I waited until she’d put them down in front of us before I answered him. I took a sip as she was leaving, and then made a face.

  “It’s strong,” I said.

  Ethan looked down at the two drinks. “Wait, did I order two martinis?”

  “Yep.”

  “Did you… Sorry. I didn’t ask, did I?”

  I shook my head. “No problem. You’ll just have to carry me back to my cabin.”

  We both laughed, and he nodded his head over toward Bruno to get me back on topic.

  “Oh, it’s the models. Tuff and Canyon, but get this—they’re not alone.”

  “Two female models with them?”

  “Nope. Actually, there aren’t any female models, at least not part of the beauty cruise. It’s just one woman with them.”

  “Anyone you know?”

  “As a matter of fact, it is. Her name’s Miffy, and she’s a lady of a certain age, if you know what I mean.”

  “She’s older than them?”

  “Yeah. By about fifty years.”

  “Goodness.” Ethan frowned and sipped at his drink. “Do you think they’re going to try and scam her or something?”

  “To be honest, they didn’t strike me as being all that bright. They might try and take advantage of her, I suppose. But then again, she might try and take advantage of them.”

  “Oh?”

  “Miffy and her friends asked me about the male models when they were boarding. They knew all about them, and they had their sights set on them. Despite the age difference.”

  Ethan shook his head. “People,” he said. “The more I meet, the less I understand them.”

  “I think you’re onto something there.”

  Ethan and I had met all manner of oddball characters on board the ship, some of whom had been involved in crimes you’d hardly believe. He definitely had a point—just when I thought I was getting a handle on how people thought and operated, we’d meet a new one, and it would all fly out the window again.

  I pulled the little toothpick out of my drink and ate the olive that had been impaled on it. I winced as I did so. Even the olive was alcoholic.

  After another sip of my drink, I craned my head around again to see what was happening.

  “Looks like they’re leaving.”

  “Right. Let’s look like we’re together.”

  “We are together.”

  Ethan grinned and took my hand across the table. We kept glancing to the side as Miffy and then Canyon and Tuff made their way across the bar and headed toward the exit.

  Miffy was walking alone, ahead of the men, but her head was held high. She didn’t pay a lick of attention to her surroundings—or us—and nor did the two men as they followed behind her. As soon as they were all gone, Ethan’s face turned dark.

  “What’s the matter?”

  He picked up his drink and downed the rest of it.

  “Bruno’s on the move too. I think he’s following them.”

  What was up with Bruno? Every interaction I saw him engaged in seemed to get stranger and stranger. I would say more suspicious, but I wasn’t sure what exactly I suspected him of doing. Yet.

  I snatched up my own drink and poured the rest of it into my mouth. When I swallowed, I felt my eyes begin to water. At least there was one good thing you could say about a martini: it was a small drink.

  To my surprise, Ethan put a hand on the side of my face and guided me toward him across the table. Just as Bruno was approaching, he kissed me. Our lips were both cold from the drinks, but his warmth overwhelmed it in an instant.

  But just like that, it was over. Ethan grabbed my hand.

  “Come on.”

  We were going to see just what the models, and Bruno, were up to.

  I followed Ethan to his office, where he immediately sat at the computer and turned the screen so I could see it.

&
nbsp; “Right… What’s her room…”

  Ethan tapped away, pulling up the VIP guest lists and locating Miffy’s cabin number. Once we had the floor, he then turned his attention to the security cameras. He could access all the ship’s CCTV from the terminal, and he pulled up the feeds for Miffy’s floor.

  “If they’re going to her cabin, they should appear any minute. Let’s see if I can get the nearby elevators too.”

  With a few more clicks, he had the screen divided into four, with Miffy’s hallway on one, two nearby elevators filling two squares, and a fourth quadrant of the screen showing the deck from which they would have been arriving.

  “There she is!” I stabbed at the screen where Miffy had just entered the elevator. Even from the small image, we could clearly see she was smiling.

  “And there are the guys.” Ethan indicated the final video feed, which showed the two models approaching the elevator Miffy had just entered. We couldn’t see Bruno yet, though I was sure he was lurking just out of sight somewhere. While there was no doubt we could have found him on another video feed if we needed to, he would show up here shortly if he actually was following as we suspected.

  We stared at the small image on the screen. The quality was surprisingly good—at least surprising to me, having grown up on movies in which the security cameras only ever seemed to record grainy black and white pictures. This was high-res and full color.

  Miffy was smiling, hands clasped together, and I think she might even have been humming. Her head seemed to keep bobbing up and down, and I realized she was bouncing on the balls of her feet. The situation didn’t seem too ominous when we just looked at Miffy, but knowing that she was being followed made it more so.

  When the elevator arrived at Miffy’s floor, she stepped out of view of one camera, and as if she were walking across the computer screen, appeared in the box beside. She headed to her stateroom, and while we watched she swiped her keycard, and entered the room.

  “There!”

  Back on the neighboring screen, the two models had called down the same elevator Miffy had taken and now entered it. As we watched, they rode it up to Miffy’s floor.