No Gentle Possession

by Anne Mather

  ‘Why?’ Her mother stared at her. ‘Oh, Karen, he hasn’t – I mean – you didn’t—?’

  ‘No, I didn’t,’ said Karen firmly. ‘That wasn’t why I came away.’

  ‘Then why did you?’ demanded her father.

  Slowly and painstakingly, Karen explained that she had gone to see Alexis when he was ill, and that she had spent the night at the house. Her father would have interrupted her then, but her mother prevented him, raising her eyebrows warningly, conveying without words that anger would achieve nothing now.

  When Karen got to the part about Michelle Whitney, however, even Laura could not remain silent, ‘I heard about her myself,’ she said. ‘She used to run after Alexis shamelessly. She was a couple of years older than he was, I recall, and when his father actually married her, he must have despised them both.’

  ‘I think he did,’ said Karen quietly. ‘So when this anniversary dinner party came up, I had to go, you see. I didn’t want you to read some sordid story about me in the press.’

  ‘But why didn’t you tell us?’ exclaimed her mother.

  ‘Would you have understood?’ Karen looked at them both.

  Her father heaved a sigh, taking out his pipe and putting it between his teeth. ‘I don’t know,’ he said. ‘I suppose after the way I’ve gone on about Whitney, it was only natural that you should keep any mention of him out of this house.’

  Karen bent her head. ‘He’s not like you said, you know,’ she said, pleating the folds of the dressing-gown. ‘I really think he’s interested in the mill. He wants to make a success of it. Whatever else there is to say about him, he’s not a layabout.’

  Her father sniffed. ‘No, well, perhaps not,’ he conceded. ‘But I’m a bit old to be taught new tricks.’

  ‘Is that what he said?’

  ‘No. I said it.’ Her father turned away. ‘But go on. You were telling us about the four of you going down to Howard Whitney’s for the week-end.’

  ‘Yes.’ Karen cupped her face in her hands. ‘All right. Well, we went, as you know. I was introduced to Alexis’s father as his fiancée, as planned, and – and as he said you didn’t know anything about it, his father agreed to keep it confidential – for the time being.’

  ‘I see.’ Her father nodded. ‘Just out of interest, how did old Howard take it?’

  Karen shrugged. ‘That was the amazing thing – he was delighted. He said – he said – oh, well, that’s not important.’ She flushed, and looked down at her hands. ‘Then last night, at the dance which followed the dinner party, Michelle got drunk. Half-way through the proceedings, she got up on the dais and told the company that Alexis and I were going to be married.’

  ‘She let the cat out of the bag,’ said her mother dryly.

  ‘Yes. But on purpose, I’m sure. She – she wanted to get back at us – for – for thwarting her.’

  ‘But what if it had been the truth?’ exclaimed her father.

  Karen made a moue with her lips. ‘Was it likely, I ask you? Much maligned though he may be, I can’t see Alexis Whitney settling for someone like me.’

  ‘Why not?’ Her father was indignant.

  ‘Oh, Pop, you know why not!’ Karen hunched her shoulders. ‘So there you are. That’s why I came away. I wanted nothing more to do with any of them.’

  Laura shook her head. ‘But what did he say afterwards? What did Ray say?’

  Karen shuddered. ‘Ray and I are through.’

  Now her father took his pipe out of his mouth and stared at her incredulously. ‘What?’

  ‘Ray and I are through,’ repeated Karen firmly. ‘We – I – that is – it was a mistake. Our going together. It would never have worked.’

  ‘But you were so close!’ exclaimed her mother.

  ‘We were friends, that was all,’ said Karen, with a sigh. ‘Just good friends. At last I understand the meaning of that phrase.’

  ‘Well, I don’t know.’ Her father looked properly put out now. ‘You go away for a week-end to enjoy yourself, and you come back on your own soaked to the skin, apparently out of friends with everybody.’

  Karen managed a faint smile. ‘Oh, Pop, you make it sound so – so ridiculous somehow.’

  ‘Well, it is ridiculous!’ retorted her father flatly. ‘Good heavens, you and Ray have known one another for years. You can’t just decide overnight that you don’t care for him any more.’

  ‘I haven’t decided overnight, as you put it. I’ve known for ages really. I just haven’t wanted to commit myself. Pop, if I’d wanted to marry Ray, we’d have got engaged ages ago.’

  ‘That’s true,’ her mother nodded sagely. ‘I told her she was a fool the other day when she refused to talk seriously about marriage. But I’m sorry all the same. Ray’s a nice boy.’

  ‘Yes.’ Karen suddenly felt unutterably tired. The sleepless night she had experienced, the soaking and the hot bath, and now the heat of the fire were all combining to draw the strength out of her. ‘Oh, Mum,’ she said, ‘would you mind if I went to bed? I feel exhausted.’

  Laura looked at her husband for confirmation and then back at Karen. ‘If that’s what you’d like to do, of course,’ she said. ‘Do you want anything to eat?’

  ‘Not right now,’ said Karen, getting to her feet. ‘I’ll come down later. If I can just have a couple of hours …’

  But in fact, Karen had many more than a couple of hours. She was sound asleep when the doorbell of the small house rang just after five o’clock, and when Laura went to answer it she found Alexis Whitney on the doorstep, beads of water standing on the thick, water-darkened smoothness of his hair.

  ‘Is Karen here?’

  His first words were abrupt, and Laura found herself nodding, and saying: ‘Yes. Yes, she’s here. She arrived home about two hours ago.’

  ‘Can I see her?’ Alexis’s jaw was tight, and a muscle was jerking low on his cheekbone.

  ‘I’m afraid not.’ Laura was firm. ‘She’s asleep at the moment, and I don’t want to disturb her.’

  Alexis dragged up the collar of his suède jacket about his ears as rain trickled down his neck from his wet hair. ‘Do you think she’ll sleep long?’ he asked. ‘Could I perhaps wait and speak to her?’

  Karen’s father came into the hall. ‘Who is it, Laura?’ he asked, and then halted. ‘Oh – it’s you!’

  ‘Yes.’ Alexis looked resignedly as though he was prepared for a tirade which never came. ‘I wanted to speak to Karen.’

  ‘So I gather.’ Daniel Sinclair glanced at his wife. ‘Do you want to come in? Karen’s in bed.’

  Alexis was taken aback by the tolerance in Daniel Sinclair’s tone. ‘I’d like to come in very much,’ he said.

  Laura stood aside and he entered the narrow hallway, as before dwarfing it with his presence. In the living-room, Daniel took his coat and indicated that he should take a chair.

  ‘You’ve just driven up from Maidenhead, I suppose.’

  Alexis frowned, and looked questioningly at Laura. ‘We know,’ she said heavily. ‘Karen told me where she was going before she left.’

  ‘I see.’ Alexis inclined his head, sitting on the couch, legs apart, his hands hanging loosely between.

  ‘Would you like some tea?’ Laura felt de trop.

  Alexis shook his head. ‘No, thank you.’

  ‘Something stronger, perhaps?’ Daniel rose to his feet again. ‘Scotch?’

  Alexis nodded. ‘That would be fine.’

  Daniel poured two drinks and handed one to Alexis while Laura excused herself on the pretext of seeing to some cakes she had in the oven. The two men sat for a while in silence, enjoying the Scotch, and then Daniel said: ‘Filthy weather.’

  Alexis dragged his thoughts back to the present with obvious difficulty. ‘Yes,’ he said. ‘Bad for driving.’

  ‘Very bad,’ Daniel nodded, lighting his pipe again. ‘I see Leeds won yesterday.’

  ‘Did they? I’m afraid I’m not familiar with soccer.’

  ‘You’re no
t?’ Daniel was scandalized. ‘And you a York-shireman!’

  ‘I used to play rugby,’ remarked Alexis mildly.

  ‘Huh!’ Daniel chewed at his pipe. ‘There’s no game like football.’

  Alexis finished his drink. Then, studying the empty glass, he said: ‘Look, suppose we cut the small talk. Exactly what did Karen tell you when she got back?’

  Daniel frowned. ‘What’s it to you?’

  Alexis sighed. ‘She was upset, I realize that—’

  ‘She was also soaked to the skin. She had to get out of the train at Leeds and make her own way here, and it was pouring down. Still is, by the looks of things.’

  Alexis nodded, running a hand round the back of his neck. ‘What a mess!’ he muttered.

  ‘Have you brought Ray and that lass back with you?’

  ‘Shirley? Yes. I dropped them before coming on here.’

  Daniel digested this. ‘Bit of a fiasco, if you ask me. Karen should have told us the truth all along, and then none of this would have happened.’

  Alexis regarded him sardonically. ‘I doubt you would have shown the equanimity you’re showing at the moment.’

  ‘Perhaps not, perhaps not.’ Daniel had to concede that. ‘Anyway, what do you want to see her for? Surely you’ve done enough, taking her down there!’

  Alexis rose to his feet. ‘I have to talk to her,’ he said.

  ‘What about?’

  ‘I want to explain—’

  ‘Explain? Explain what? That that stepmother of yours is a bitch?’

  Alexis turned away, and just then Laura came back into the room. ‘What’s going on, Dan?’

  Alexis stood his empty glass on the mantelpiece. ‘Is Karen still sleeping?’

  ‘Yes. I’ve just been up to her. Poor kid, she’s exhausted!’

  ‘Yes. I’m sorry.’ Alexis thrust his hands into his pockets. ‘I suppose it would be best if I came back to see her tomorrow evening.’

  ‘It would be best.’

  ‘All right.’ He walked to the door. ‘Good night, then. Good night, Dan.’

  ‘Good night.’ Daniel rose to his feet and nodded farewell.

  Laura saw him out and after he had gone she came back to the living-room. ‘I wonder why he came,’ she mused.

  ‘To see that Karen was home safely.’

  ‘Yes, but why did he want to talk to her?’

  ‘I don’t know. Anyway, it’s not worth bothering about. Now, what about tea?’

  Karen’s wish that she might not have to face Ray and Shirley was realized in a way she had least expected.

  The following morning, she awoke with a fuzzy head and a temperature that soared by the minute, and after taking one look at her Laura called the doctor. He came soon after ten and pronounced that Karen had caught a chill, and insisted that she stayed in bed.

  Karen herself was quite content to comply. She felt pretty awful, and terribly weak. She slept almost the whole day, and by evening her cheeks were flushed and unhealthy.

  Towards teatime her mother came to tell her that Ray had called to see her, but Karen shook her head vigorously, causing a veritable hammer to pound away in her temples, and declared that she didn’t want to see anyone.

  Laura didn’t argue, and Ray went away again, but Laura realized she would have to tell her daughter that Alexis Whitney had called the previous evening, and that he, too, was likely to call again later.

  ‘I don’t want to see him,’ said Karen throatily. ‘I couldn’t. Not right now. Wait until I’m feeling a bit more able to cope. Besides – besides, I look such a mess!’

  Oh, Karen, what does that matter? What shall I tell him?’

  ‘Tell him I’m asleep.’

  ‘Not again.’

  ‘Please, Mum. I couldn’t face – I couldn’t face him.’

  Tears of weakness were gathering in her eyes, so Laura made no further effort to get her to change her mind, but Alexis was a different proposition from Ray.

  ‘Is she awake?’ he demanded harshly, when Laura said that Karen wasn’t receiving visitors.

  ‘Well, yes—’

  ‘Then I’m going to see her.’

  He put Laura firmly aside, and before she could stop him he was half-way up the stairs. It was still daylight, and Daniel wasn’t yet home from work, and she didn’t know what to do. She made as though to follow him, but he halted at the top of the stairs and said: ‘Please. Give me five minutes.’

  With a sigh she turned away, and Alexis thrust open Karen’s door and entered the room.

  Karen had heard this interchange from a drowsy state of inertia which was banished by the vitality of his physical dominance. She put up an unsteady hand to her tousled hair, and said: ‘What do you want?’

  Alexis came to the bed, and looked down at her. ‘Our positions are reversed,’ he remarked, with some satisfaction.

  ‘I told my mother I didn’t want to see anybody.’

  ‘I know. But I wanted to see you.’

  ‘What makes you so special?’ Karen drew the covers up to her nose.

  ‘I wanted to talk to you.’ He sat down on the side of the bed. ‘Why did you run away yesterday?’

  ‘I didn’t run away. I came away. That’s a different thing.’

  ‘So – why did you come away? What were you afraid of?’

  ‘I wasn’t afraid of anything.’ Karen turned her face into the pillow. ‘I just didn’t want anything more to do with it.’

  ‘With me, you mean?’ Alexis’s eyes were hard.

  ‘All right. With you, then.’

  Alexis heaved a sigh. ‘Why? I wasn’t to blame for what Michelle said. Besides, as it happens there was no harm done. The only press who touched the story was a local rag, and even they played it down.’

  ‘How nice for you! What a relief that must have been. I could have been suing you for breach of promise!’

  ‘Karen!’ He spoke her name savagely.

  ‘Well? Isn’t it true?’ Karen moved her legs restlessly under the bedcoverings. ‘Anyway, it’s all over now. I’ve told my parents the truth.’

  ‘So I hear.’

  ‘You won’t be able to blackmail me any more—’

  ‘I didn’t blackmail you,’ he snapped angrily.

  ‘Didn’t you? Well, somebody did.’

  ‘Karen!’ He rose abruptly to his feet. ‘It’s impossible to talk with you in this mood.’

  ‘I’m sorry. But I did ask you not to come.’

  ‘When do you think you’ll be up and about again?’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘I want to see you.’

  ‘Oh, no.’

  ‘Karen, stop it!’ His voice was rough. ‘I have to see you again, damn you, and I don’t care what anyone says!’

  ‘Mr. Whitney!’ Laura’s voice came from the doorway. ‘Is that any way to speak to a sick girl?’

  Alexis turned abruptly. ‘No, I guess it’s not,’ he muttered, and brushing past her he went out of the bedroom. They heard his footsteps on the stairs and then the hollow bang as the front door closed behind him.

  In fact, Karen was not up and about again in a week as her parents and the doctor had expected her to be. In spite of their care and the use of antibiotics, the chill degenerated into pneumonia and for several days she was scarcely conscious of what was going on around her. Her temperature soared to a hundred and five and she felt so ill she almost wanted to die. But then the crisis came, and it broke leaving her weak but recovering. Even so, it was obvious it was going to be several weeks before she was completely well again.

  Easter was approaching, and the weather was unseasonably mild after the harsh winter they had just experienced, and Laura suggested that Karen might go and spend a couple of weeks with her aunt in Keswick.

  Karen had to smile at this, although in recent weeks she seemed to have found little to smile about. But those wishes she had made on the bus had all come true, and she realized that it was possible to achieve something one had hoped for without the apprec
iation one had expected to feel. Right now, if she had been fit enough, she would have liked to have gone back to work. The activity would have acted as a kind of therapy, destroying the depressive state she seemed to have allowed herself to sink into. The doctor said it was natural, he said that it was a normal aftermath of a serious illness such as she had had, but she knew it wasn’t so. At least not altogether. It had more to do with the fact that Alexis had not come back …

  Ray had come to see her when she was first over the crisis. But they had been stilted with one another, both aware of what had happened that week-end at Falcons, but neither of them wishing to actually broach the subject. In consequence, he had not come back either, and she had not even had news of the school to buoy her failing confidence.

  ‘Well?’ her mother was saying now, as they sat together in the living-room one sunny afternoon. ‘Do you think you’d like a couple of weeks away? I mean, you won’t be able to return to school until after the Easter holidays, and a break might do you good.’

  ‘All right.’ Karen sounded listless.

  ‘You might be a bit more enthusiastic about it,’ remarked her mother dryly.

  ‘I am, really. It’s just that – well, you know the doctor said it would take time …’

  And so, a few days later, Karen went to Keswick, to her Aunt Margaret’s, in the hope that her mother’s sister might effect the cure she had effected seven years before.

  It was April now, and there were lambs in the fields, and the Lake District was wrapped in the wonderful aura of spring. Daffodils and wild narcissi grew in profusion at the lakeside, and already there were tourists poking about in the gift and souvenir shops. Easter was always a busy time there and this particular Easter was no exception. Karen’s parents came over to Keswick for a couple of days during the break and they all went out in the car touring the beauty spots.

  To Karen’s relief, her cousin Bryan, who had previously made quite a nuisance of himself where she was concerned, was now going out with a girl whose father farmed just outside of town, which meant that Karen was able to go about alone without arousing too much comment.

  After her parents’ return, her father wrote to her a couple of times. In one of his letters he mentioned that the assessment of Alexis’s idea of the forklift truck had been made and plans were going ahead to dismantle the conveyor belt.