The Santa Hoax

by Francis Gideon

  “Wear your mittens, then, too,” his father said. He handed over the pink-and-purple ones a different aunt had made for him two years ago.

  “No thanks,” Julian said. “I’ll be good. My coat’s deep, and I need to keep my fingers free for the iPod.”

  Damien didn’t push, and Julian was relieved. As he peeked out the frosted glass of their house, three figures ambled by on the pathway.

  “I think that’s them,” Julian said, grasping the doorknob. “Be back soon.”

  “Yeah. Sure, sure.” Damien seemed to reach out, as if to say good-bye, but Julian was too fast. He shut the door and then jogged down the front pathway, in a rush to meet his friends.

  “There you are!” Maria said, eagerly greeting him.

  She wore jeggings that clung to her thighs and waist, along with a white coat Julian hadn’t seen before. Josie hung around at her side, wearing pretty much the exact same thing she had earlier, looking up from her phone every so often to verify where they were. She has GPS. How adorable. Davis was by her side, his baseball hat pulled down over his face. The collar of his dark jacket was flipped up in the slight wind and obscured his face.

  “Sorry if I’m late,” Julian apologized. “Had to say good-bye to my dad.”

  “Nah, you’re fine. Just on time.” Maria linked her arm with Julian’s as they moved toward the sidewalk. “Where are we going now, Josie?”

  “Just to the left,” she said, then leaned close to Julian and whispered so only he could hear. “Davis is driving me crazy already. Help.”

  “Just focus on the lights,” he said. “And maybe think of drawing a comic or two.”

  “Come on,” Maria stated, keeping Julian’s attention on her. “Show me some houses.”

  Josie walked ahead of the two of them, Davis by her side. They continued down the block two by two as the sun sank behind the trees. The chill set in almost immediately after, and though the wind whipped at their faces and blew Maria’s hair, she never once complained about being cold. Julian had no idea what he was supposed to do if she was. Do I give her my coat? That was what guys on dates did. But if this was a date—not that it was—then Maria probably saw him as a girl. So Julian was doubly confused and decided to not think about it at all. He pulled the group over into the next subdivision, where they were almost blinded by the first house they saw. Lights lined the roof, crisscrossing and in several different Christmas colors. There were also a few light-up Santas, snowmen, and Christmas stars hanging by the garage.

  “Oh, wow. It’s like walking on the surface of the sun,” Josie exclaimed, using a hand to block some of the light.

  “Total Griswolds,” Maria commented. “Like that movie Christmas Vacation, you know?”

  “Yeah, I guess. Just like that.”

  “Their electricity bills must be through the roof,” Josie stated. “No wonder there is global warming.”

  “If there is, why is it still so cold?” Davis asked, rubbing his hands together.

  Josie began to explain, only getting through a few complex statements before Davis put his hands up. “Okay, fine, fine. I’m wrong. I get it.”

  Maria rolled her eyes and then tugged Julian forward. “So is this a house you like? You strike me as someone more subtle.”

  “Yeah,” Julian said, grinning. “I walk around a lot, actually. Let me show you a better house.”

  After a small walk, Julian stopped them in front of Mr. Stevenson’s house. His blue icicle lights hung over the garage and by his front windows. He also had a floodlight that displayed a small silhouette of a snowman on his garage.

  “Okay,” Maria said. “Why do you like this one?”

  “It’s not too garish, or even that Christmas or religious oriented.”

  “And?” Maria asked, nudging him. “You’re holding out on me.”

  “Well, if you think about it, this time of year is really about light, right? All the holidays celebrate light because it’s the darkest time.”

  Everyone nodded, so Julian went on. “And this house is usually dark most of the time. Mr. Stevenson used to work at my elementary school, actually. He was the music teacher, but he got sick, and his kids have to take care of him now. But they still put up his lights, and I really like that. I don’t know. The whole thing reminds me of learning to play an instrument in his class. Probably dumb.”

  “No, no,” Maria said, squeezing his arm. “Not dumb. What did you play?”

  “Piano. I was never that good, though.”

  “You probably were, but you’re just shy now. That’s okay,” Maria said, her eyes going back to the house. “I can appreciate this.”

  Julian nodded. He wanted to add more about how he had first started playing, but realizing that would involve Aiden, he cut off the thought before it had a chance to catch hold. When Julian heard clicking from a phone, he turned to see Davis in the middle of writing a message, not even listening to what he had just said. That was okay, really. Julian hadn’t really been talking to Davis when he told the story. But as he looked back to find Josie, she was already across the street, taking a picture of a rabbit in the bushes. It had been Maria, and only Maria, who was listening intently to him. When he glanced back over to her, he found her staring at him.

  “What?” he asked.

  “Nothing,” she said, smiling softly. “Just thanks for telling me. I wouldn’t have known any of that without you.”

  “I got a million stories.”

  “I’ll bet,” Maria said, then looked past him toward Josie with a sigh. “But we should probably catch up with the group. And I think this street is a dead end, right?”

  “Right.” Julian nodded. “I know how to get out, though.”

  The two of them wandered over to Josie, who had finally gotten a photo of the rabbit. After ohhing and ahhing, they grabbed Davis and Julian directed them out. He found a catwalk close by and was relieved to see it was salted. Their shoes crunched in the temporary dark from the pine trees covering the streetlamps as they crossed into another subdivision.

  “I thought it was supposed to snow tonight?” Julian asked. “Right now it’s just really cold.”

  “It was,” Josie sighed. “But maybe later? It’s still cloudy.”

  This seemed to be enough for everyone. As they came out on the other side, Maria’s foot skidded as she collided with ice.

  “Jesus Christ!” she cried as she fell, pulling Julian down with her.

  “That’s the Christmas spirit,” Davis said. He extended a hand to help them up and patted them on the back. “Better?”

  “Yes,” Maria mumbled.

  Their arms had come apart in the tussle, and Julian was surprised when she didn’t link up with him again. “You know, for someone who doesn’t even seem to be swept up into the whimsy of Christmas, you’re certainly doing good deeds, Davis. Santa will reward you.”

  “Screw Santa,” Davis said. “He’s nothing more than a pedophile if all he does is watch kids.”

  “Not to mention bestiality, since it’s gotta get lonely and cold at the North Pole,” Maria added, cackling.

  “And now my childhood is ruined,” Josie said, shuddering.

  “I thought it already was when I came along?” Maria quipped, throwing her arm around her.

  More jabs and jokes were exchanged, but Julian kept walking, his eyes peeled for more ice. A streetlamp lit a new pathway leading toward a subdivision behind Julian’s house. Bright lights from a baseball field carved out a park that was typically invisible at night. As they got closer, Julian realized it was all under a thin layer of ice, making the slides and monkey bars look as if they were part of a lost world.

  “Whoa,” he said, pointing ahead. “Look at that!”

  “Park? Park!” Maria gasped excitedly, then quickened her pace on the sidewalk. Davis also walked faster, his longer legs making distinct strides.

  “Really?” Josie said. “Right now?”

  “What? Just because you think you’re not a kid anymore d
oesn’t mean we can’t still have fun!” Maria shouted. She scrambled up the ladder to a platform on the park, then combed her hair behind her ears as she straightened up. Against the bright lights and in the slight wind, she looked as if she were on a pirate ship. Even Josie seemed to be in awe as she walked forward carefully into the park. Julian was the only person who lingered behind.

  “Besides,” Maria added when Josie was closer. “I bet the slide will be extra fun to go down now.”

  Josie and Julian exchanged looks as Maria bounded down the yellow plastic slide. Her delighted squeals came to a halt as the ice ran out and her jeans got caught on the bottom. Davis leaned against a pole, trying to act cool but suppressing his giggles as Maria’s legs flailed.

  “Come on,” Josie said, gesturing toward Julian. “We should go to make sure they don’t kill themselves.”

  Julian took another look around. From the top of that playground platform, he figured he could see the rest of the neighborhood Christmas lights.

  “Okay. Sounds like a plan,” he said. “But I’ll race you to the slide first, Josie?”

  Without waiting for an answer, Julian took off running. Josie yelped, but her small legs took her a lot faster than Julian anticipated. By the time his fingers reached the cold, cold metal of the playground, she was already sitting at the edge of the slide.

  “Coming down!” Josie shouted, then crashed into Maria at the bottom.

  Julian laughed as the two of them tussled. When he looked out from the platform, he had been right. All the city lights shone back at him, each one red and tiny and like his own private Christmas wish.

  “You coming?” Maria asked from the bottom of the slide. “Or are you completely lame?”

  “Ugh, fine,” Julian complained, but his smile was still there. He pressed his feet to the edge of the slide, then launched himself down in another haze of laughter.

  AFTER THE slide, Julian curled up on the tire swing close to the equipment. He took out his iPod and, after some searching, pulled up an old playlist from a movie and put it on shuffle. When the song “Dear Prudence” came on, he kicked his feet away from the tire swing and watched the park. Davis and Josie were on the slide again, going down repeatedly and oftentimes together. Julian laughed a little at just how easily the two of them had suddenly made up whatever difference they had. As Josie moved over to the monkey bars, trying to swing by herself, Davis held her by the waist and helped her along.

  “Just like being a kid again, huh?” Maria said, suddenly appearing by Julian’s side. He ceased his movement on the tire swing, taking out his earbuds.

  “Hmm?”

  “I said it’s just like being a kid. Except now we know how lucky we were back then. Not worrying about anything at all.”

  Her shoes made a crunching noise as she leaned against the swing post. Her skin was smooth under the moonlight, making her look like a carved statue in her white coat. Julian’s heart quickened.

  “Hey,” she said, turning back to him. “What are you looking at?”

  “Nothing,” Julian said quickly. “Just Davis and Josie.”

  “Ah, yeah. Young love. I knew they’d be good together.”

  “How?”

  “They’re both so stubborn, it was bound to happen.”

  Julian snorted. Somehow that wasn’t the answer he expected. He wanted to know how Maria made matches in her mind, and if she really thought he would be good with her.

  “What were you listening to?” Maria asked. “Can I?”

  Julian extended the earbud. When Maria sat down with him on the tire swing, he made no effort to move. Their knees touched, but that was it. She hummed along to the song, seeming to recognize it. When it moved on to “Daydream” by Smashing Pumpkins, she asked, “This is from Perks of Being a Wallflower, right?”

  “Right. I hate the movie. But the music was good. I usually listen to the soundtrack when I go on walks.”

  “By yourself?”

  Julian nodded. When he still felt her eyes on him, he expanded. “I like the way the city looks at night. More than at Christmas, though that’s pretty too.”

  “What is it you like, exactly?”

  “This is going to sound weird.”

  “Probably not.”

  Julian shrugged. “I like to look inside people’s houses. Not to watch them change or anything—that’s gross. But I like to see how other families work. If they eat dinner together or watch TV until midnight.”

  “And what have you found?”

  “A lot of people use drapes.”

  Maria laughed, so sudden and sweet that Julian found himself giggling along too.

  “That’s actually super sweet,” she said. “You have to live near apartment buildings, though, if you want a show like that.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah. Those places are usually more interesting anyway.” When the song ended, Maria passed the earbud back. She gripped the chains of the tire swing, then glanced down the pathway they had come up on. “You want to get out of here? Go on another small walk?”

  Julian didn’t have a chance to answer before Maria slipped her hand inside of his. At first he thought it was an accident because of how they were sitting on the swing. But as her fingers curled around his palm, still chilled by the nighttime air, he knew she was for real. And his question, about whether or not this was a date, was answered.

  Julian squeezed her hand back. Some days when he got too cold at night from walking, he would have to go home prematurely. It was barely nine o’clock now, and he wouldn’t have to be back for a while. Maria and Josie probably didn’t have a curfew, and Davis did whatever he wanted. With Maria’s hand in his, he could travel around a lot longer in the dark.

  “Sure,” Julian said. “We can go for a walk. I think I’d like that a lot, actually.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  “BEFORE WE go any further,” Julian said. “I have to ask: is this a date?”

  Maria laughed, tugging on his hand as they walked across the street. Most of the houses they passed by now weren’t decorated. In the distance, Julian saw an apartment complex. Most of the lights were on, casting an eerie blue glow if they didn’t have Christmas lights hanging off their balconies.

  “What would you like it to be?” Maria asked. “I’ve been pretty much playing this whole thing like improv. My idea about throwing together Josie and Davis worked, but I don’t like to get ahead of myself.”

  “Really?” Julian asked, somewhat skeptical. It seemed like all Maria did was get ahead and make jokes. But those were jokes, he reminded himself. Now, with her hand in his, things were different. Real. And she likes you. She actually does. Now—do you like her?

  Julian thought of the song on the playlist they had just listened to. The lyrics for “Daydream” were hard to hear in Billy Corgan’s voice, but Julian knew the emotion in the song; it was intimate, more so than looking into apartment building windows and seeing people’s private lives on the inside. Julian was sure he felt that same emotion for Maria. He liked her a lot, even if she didn’t always call him the right name. After telling Josie, Julian had sworn her to secrecy—so Maria didn’t know about him right now. Josie said she’d call him J in the meantime and just be patient until he was ready to come out. And if Josie had been understanding, it was really likely Maria would be too.

  “Um. Yeah. I think I do. But I have to tell you something first.”

  “Okay,” Maria said, her voice thin and high. They stopped at a crosswalk, their hands still together. “So long as you’re not, like, some pervert we should be good.”

  Julian blinked as if he had been struck. What if people did think he was a pervert for wanting to be this way? He pushed the doubt from his mind as the crosswalk sign changed. As they walked, he stole glances to the side, noticing her nose and her dark eyelashes. Long eyelashes. She’s so beautiful, he marveled. She could be so feminine and didn’t seem troubled by it. She could let the hormones go into her body and affect her—an
d not fight it. Julian wanted to, in the most naïve of ways, ask how she was so beautiful. How did it feel to be that beautiful? Maria would probably laugh and tell him that it was awful, because everyone thought you were there to be looked at and not talked to.

  “If you keep looking at me like that,” Maria said, as if she could read his thoughts, “I may have to play spin the bottle with you again. Only I may not leave it up to chance.”

  “Hah,” Julian said. “Don’t worry, that’s not what I was going to tell you. Or ask you.”

  “Too bad. But stop leaving me in suspense, okay? It only leaves me to think bad thoughts.”

  Julian let out another low laugh, his breath turning to vapor as he did. They were pretty far away now from the park, but he could see the bright lights from the baseball diamond when he turned back. Across from the apartment building was a group of guys, loudly yelling as they took their skateboards to some of the iced-up ramps and sidewalks. Maria seemed distracted by them too, and for a second, Julian actually lost his train of thought.

  “Right. Well, if this is a date, I’m going to need you to call me something else…,” Julian began, then stopped.

  A boy, slightly taller than Davis, skated across the exact same road, heading toward the apartment buildings. With his hood up, he was hardly recognizable. But with the bright blue hoodie and lightning-bolt stickers on his skateboard, Julian knew.

  Aiden. Of course it was him. Only Aiden was stupid and brilliant enough to think about skateboarding during the first winter snow, using the ice as another way to add a challenge. Maria must have seen how all the color drained from Julian’s face, because she quickly grasped his hand, pulling him aside.

  “We should go back. It’s actually getting pretty late now, don’t you think?”

  “Um.” Julian stumbled on a patch of ice, nearly falling over. Maria grabbed his shoulders and straightened him out, just as Aiden made eye contact. He lingered for a brief moment, his gaze going from Julian to Maria then back again, before he turned away.