by Dee Ellis
Going to weddings, being there for the births of their kids, housewarming parties, that shit is way better. A few of us took our time getting here, and a few of us—myself included—didn't make the right choice the first time. Arriving at the condo, seeing the love on Hunter's face when he sees his wife, I'm positive they got it right.
Seeing my girl waiting for us to share this with them, I know I got it right this time, too.
Getting to the hospital, Lola to a delivery room and the show on the road was a blur. Before I knew it, Brynn and I were both in head to toe blue crepe like scrubs, following a chattering nurse down a wood paneled hallway. Brynn managed to make those scrubs look hot as fuck.
“I'm fucking you in those scrubs.” I warned her as we followed behind the nurse,
“Behave.” Brynn's creamy skin flushed though, freckles dotting her nose and I knew she didn't mean it.
Besides, the sway she put in her hips told me certainly did not want me to behave. We followed the nurse past the windows protecting a handful of newborns and I paused. Brynn went a few steps without me before turning back. I didn't have to say the words, somehow, she just knew.
“Amelia won't remember you watching her on the other side of a pane of glass, baby. She will remember you telling her stories. Rocking her while you listen to Stevie Nicks. Cuddling with her on Sunday mornings when we all sleep in. That's what she will remember. You being the best father you how to be.” Brynn slid beneath my arm, hooking hers around me and pressing her face against my neck.
I loved her. I loved Brynn more than I knew you could love someone. There was barely room in my heart for anything else except Amelia. I loved that Princess without end. Would do anything for her, I knew it that first day. Now I had two women I would die for, would literally lay my life down for.
I felt the words on my lips. Was so damned ready to say them to her. Until I looked down and saw her face. Saw the sadness in those mossy green eyes, tears glistening in them, as she too stared in at the sleeping babies. I knew I couldn't say them until Brynn could be honest with me; because until then, if she said them back, they wouldn't be true. They wouldn't really be mine.
I was aware of everything about Brynn. Had watched her from afar for so long. I knew when she was tired or anxious. When she was angry or sad. I knew how to touch her just right to get her hot. I knew when she was holding back. When she was lying.
Brynn had been lying to me for months. Lying to me and Lola and everyone around us. Lying to herself. Letting first Lola then me and Amelia be her excuse to avoid going home. Truth was, whatever the truth was, it was not going to let her get away so easily. We were bigger than the truth, Brynn and her truth just had to get right with that.
“Let's go. We got places to be.” I head down the hall as anger floods me
“Levi, wait....” I don't wait. Don't slow down. Never even look back before we push through the doors into Lola's room.
The room is contained chaos. Lola already has a hospital gown on—bright purples and blues that she chose weeks ago—legs up in stirrups. A tangent of the foulest language I have ever heard streams from her tiny body as it writhes on the bed. But, in true Lola fashion, she says this filth as she giggles and gazes lovingly at Hunter.
“Jesus mother fuck a whore.” Lola shrieks before her shout breaks off into a laugh.
“Lola Bear. Language. Little ones are about to be among us.” I tsk as I edge towards the bed.
“Midge. We're here, mama.” Brynn softens once she lays eyes on her best friend.
The women bend their heads towards one another, Brynn smoothing her hand over Lola's belly. Something passes between them that I can't ignore. That look speaks of something shared between the two of them and no one else.
I try to stay angry. Try to hold on to it so I can protect myself when I need to. Protect Amelia. Until Brynn looks at me.
Tears shine in her jade eyes and I break. Whatever it is that just happened between them, it's part of what she keeps from me. And in that look, I know it kills her to do it. I know that she wants me to push. Brynn wants someone to make her come clean, someone to stop making it so damn easy on her. And I'm going to be that someone.
Somewhere along the line, people stopped asking the questions that mattered. Stopped seeing her answers. Her parents, her brother, maybe even Lola. Brynn carried all of it around on her own, waiting for someone to give a fuck enough to ask and take some of it for her.
To let her admit her bad choices and fuck ups then move away from them. Let them go. Instead of forcing her to line them up inside her walls and face them alone every fucking day.
I go to her now, taking her hand and bringing it to my lips. I'm still angry. Still hurt. Because I want to know the truth. But I'm pissed because it’s me who hasn't had the balls to ask. I can't lose her again. Not when I finally found what I'd always been looking for in her.
Brynn and Amelia take the dull, pulsing ache of loneliness away. They make me want to build a fucking castle and let them rule my entire fucking world inside the safety of it.
We stay by our friends while they welcome their first child. I hold her hand tight, watching her coach Lola like a pro. I even take Hunter's hand for a moment right after the tiny human comes screaming out. We will deny that later, I'm sure.
“It's...a boy!” Hunter hoots loudly enough I have no doubt he woke the other babies on the floor.
I watch him cradle that tiny baby, already promising him shit about fast cars and football and I am both proud to be part of it and again sad I missed my daughter being born. Then my eyes sweep towards Brynn, who I think will be tending to Lola.
Instead, her eyes are soft as she watches me. No matter what, she never let go of my hand once I reached out to her. I tug her once and she comes to me, nuzzling into my chest. I breath deep her sweet peppermint-peony scent, holding her tight. When she tips her head back and looks at me in that way that drives me crazy, I start backing from the room.
“Excuse us. Mom. Dad.” I wink at the couple as they cuddle on the bed with their new son.
I don't wait for a response. I'm shoving Brynn down the hall, past rooms full of new mothers, fathers, sons and daughters. I don't stop until I find an empty room around a corner. I close the heavy door and lock it behind us.
Brynn says nothing. Just watches me. I untie the loose string of the scrubs I pulled on earlier. My dick is tenting them, I'm so hard. Just a push and I spring out, my hand going to pump a few times. I get two strokes in before Brynn is on her knees, her hands wrapping around me.
“Open your mouth.” I command as both my hands thread through her crimson hair.
Brynn obeys, opening her pink lips and closing them around my cock. I hiss out a moan, almost shooting down her throat the second her tongue swirls around me. I still her head, refusing to let her move until I get a hold of my shit. I loosen my hold and she starts moving, bobbing her head. Filling the room with lewd, fuck-hot sounds of her sucking my cock.
“Holy, fuck, honey. You look so hot with those lips wrapped around me. That's it, just like that. Fuck, baby.” I'm pumping my hips, her hand is holding my balls, rolling them, and she's sucking until her cheeks hollow out.
I want to be inside her though. Need it. Need to come with her. I don't know how long I can last with her sucking me like that. I smell how hot she is, hear her scrubs rustle, and look down. Fuck. Her hand is in her scrubs, rubbing furiously at her pussy.
“Fuck, Brynn. It gets you that hot to suck my cock? Don't you make that pussy come. I need it. Need to feel you come on my cock again.” I let her take me to the back of her throat a few more times, because, Jesus, it’s so good, but I stop her.
I twist her towards the single bed in the room, bending her over it. With a hard yank, I tear those scrubs down her legs Fuck. She's bare beneath, her thighs slick and her desire sweet and heavy in the air. I drop behind her, licking that sweetness up, suckling at her throbbing clit.
“Brynn, you taste so fucking goo
d, honey. So sweet.” I lick at her, spreading her swollen lips with my tongue, sucking hard and long.
“Fuck. Levi!” Her hands fist the sterile sheets, her thighs trembling already.
“I love that fucking sound.” I growl, slapping her ass hard, my dick jerking when she moans.
I want to make her come on my tongue again, but I can't wait. I stand, lifting her left knee up on to the bed, spreading her open to me. I don't have a condom, but right then, I don't even want one. All I can think of us what we were just a part of. About having something like that with her.
“I'm fucking you raw, Brynn. I want to come inside you. Want to feel my cum fill you up. Tell me not to.” As much as I may want it, as clouded as my head is, I won't take the choice from her.
“Yes. Yes. Come inside me, baby.” That's it. I'm a goner.
I thrust once, so hard, so deep she cries out, burying her face into the mattress. I slap her ass again, warning her to be quiet. Grabbing hold of her hips, I start thrusting. Deep, hard thrusts that rock her body, move the entire bed and bury me inside her. I wrap one hand around her thick hair, tugging her head back, bending to take her mouth.
It’s hot and sweaty and noisy and absolutely crazy. All I can think of is coming. Making her come. Making her pregnant. Making this all stick. Keeping her for my queen. Being her king. My tongue is tangling with hers, my hips pumping as I pound into her, breathless and crazy.
“Don't care if it sticks tonight. It's going to stick. My queen. Going to give me princes and Princesses.” I just think of giving her children, giving her the fairytale I think she deserves.
“Fuck, Levi. Baby.” There it is; those words, and that sound she moans before she comes.
My pace picks up because I want to come with her. Want to share that with her. It’s almost savage how hard, how fast I pump my hips, but she takes it. My face is in her shoulder, my chest to her back, my mouth at her skin. My teeth sink in when I feel my orgasm start to build and then she starts to shudder, and we come together.
We collapse against the bed, breathless and sweaty. I don't move for a moment, feeling my dick jerk as I spill inside her. And, fuck, I like how that feels. Then, I panic.
I worry I was too rough, too absolutely fucking crazy. Threatening to get her pregnant? Calling her my queen like that? Asking for Princess and Princesses? What the fuck, Lev? Too much GOT, maybe. Brynn fills the quiet with giggles, her body trembling beneath mine.
“Shall I bend the knee?” I laugh too, expelling the breath I had been holding as I swat at her backside.
“Of course, you should. You do magic with that mouth, honey.” We laugh again and the weirdness is gone, just like that.
I fix her clothes, looking up at her as I bend to tug her pants back up. As I do, I quirk a brow, pointedly shoving my come inside her. Brynn moans, her eyes fluttering and I grin. Fuck, this woman. I dress again, shoving onto the bed and opening my arms. Brynn crawls into them, snuggling close as we come down from the impromptu love making.
After a few moments, I want to ask. What that look was that passed between her and Lola. Why she never let my hand go while Lola was in labor. Why she seemed as sad as I was about the parts we had missed with Amelia. Turns out, she seems to want to share.
“You want more kids, baby?” I nod before she finished the question, closing my arms around her.
“Mmm, yes, I do. Don't know that I knew that for sure before Amelia. I do now though. Is that what you want to ask?” Brynn pops up and the sadness in her eyes breaks my heart.
“Did...all that you just said....” She bows her head and I reach out, shoving her hair behind her ear and tipping her chin back up.
“I meant it. Fuck, Honey, the idea of you carrying my child. I want it, Brynn. I want tonight for us. This belly round with my son. Being there with you while you grow our child. I want it so fucking bad. I want everything with you.” Brynn looks away, her hair falling into her face.
“Why do you believe I could be a mother?” I cradle her jaw, turning glossy eyes back to mine.
“Oh honey. Because you are. Amelia is as much yours as she is mine. You are her mother, Brynn. You’ve been there from the moment I asked you to give us a chance. Every morning, every night, and in between; it's been you. You are Amelia’s mother. All she knows. She loves you so much...and I...” Just as I start to tell her I do too, she breaks my heart.
“I had a daughter...I wasn't very good at it the first time...” Brynn begins to sob, her entire body shaking on the bed.
“What...when? With...with who? Talk to me, baby. I need to know, Brynn. Every single part of you. Let's start here.” I plead, urging her to break down the last of her crumbling bricks and let me in.
“Prom night of my senior year. I was being as rebellious as Brynn Gold got. Because I had nothing left to lose. My grades were aces, I was valedictorian, I got into my first-choice college, and had my future waiting for me to step into it. Lola was...gone. Then my brother. There was nothing left of me by then. My parents considered both their children dead. Nothing left to lose,” I cradle her on the tiny bed, smoothing my fingers through her hair as she looked into her past “Like a fool, I said yes to the sleazy quarterback, wore the sluttiest dress possible, and let him take me to the hotel after two songs. Let him tell me it would be so much better without a condom. I wanted it. Wanted to give away the last part of me that I still had. Three months later when classes started, I realized how much I had given away. I aced everything back then; including getting pregnant on my first try.” Brynn let out a snort of a laugh. I just brought her closer, held her tighter.
“Did he...I mean, did he want to be a part of it?” Brynn shook her head and sniffled.
“No. Said it was impossible. He was too skilled, he said; pulled out like a pro. I didn't want him to be a part of it, to be honest. I didn't even know him. He was a means to an end. A pretty one, but still. I knew right away I didn't want to keep her. Not because I didn't want her. Or even because it was a stupid mistake. I loved Abbi the moment I knew she existed. I don't know how it's possible. But I know it is.” I knew exactly what she meant.
“I hated Isabel by the time she brought Amelia to me. The minute I looked at that Princess, I loved her. I don't care if she is mine or not. She's mine.” Brynn smiles and nods too.
“I did too, I think. That first night I knew that love again. I said yes for you. For me. Because I wanted to be with you anyway I could be. But for her too, because I already loved her somehow. Even when it hurt to feel that again.” Pain flares in my chest as I realize what I did to my girl.
“Oh, honey. I made you come raise my daughter after you...” Brynn twists, going up on her knees between my legs.
“Amelia is what started healing me, baby. It was hard, yes. At first. To see her grow and change and know I missed it. Holding her, putting her to bed, cuddling with her while I read to her; all the things I missed out on. I made a choice for her, Levi. I had nothing to give her then. Even less after. Doesn't mean I never wished I did. I do all the time, and that just my selfishness. But, I loved her and I love Amelia.” Brynn catches her bottom lip in her teeth because we both see it. See her biting her words back. Brynn loves me, too and right then, she nearly said so.
There's so much more to say. More truths to be told after tonight. Right then neither of us needed it. I just needed her. To feel her, and see that look in her eyes. One that shines of her own need and love. Because I know that's how I look at her.
I take her mouth, hands shoving at her scrubs again. Brynn scrambles to get closer, opening her lips to my tongue, giving me that moan that's her plea for more. I yank her down my lap, already driving into her the moment I have her scrubs out of the way.
“Levi!” Brynn moans, both hands hooking into my shoulders, nails digging in just like I like it,
“Hush, honey. Don't close those eyes, Brynn. You look at me when I'm inside you. Nowhere else. Tell me why.” I demand as I curve my hands around her hips, slamming he
r down on my cock.
“Because it's us. Just us.” Brynn whimpered, bucking against me, her eyes wild and hungry.
“Fucking right. Just us honey. You're just mine. I'm just yours. No one else.” I angled her hips, hissing out a groan as she shoved off me, then slid back down again.
This time, it’s less rushed, less about my need to make it stick. Because, I know now, it is going to stick. With or without Amelia, this would stick. I fuck her slow and deep, watching the parts of her that were empty fill up. With me. With Amelia, with us. When I come inside her again, I don't care if it sticks or not.
We are going to stick.
Brynn's walls are little more than rubble at her feet. But, I still need to wade through the destruction and build her back up. Make her strong and whole again. Tonight, I intend to get started on doing just that.
Gwen refused to return Amelia, at least till tomorrow, giving us our very first baby-free night. I plan to destroy every wall Brynn has left tonight. Then get to the building part.
We leave a happy family at the hospital, both Hunter and Lola beaming. The ride home is quite but charged with everything we said, everything we will say. I hold Brynn close to me, knowing damn well tonight has changed us. Changed this thing between us. Brynn wants to build a fairytale with me too. I just need to figure out what we are fighting to keep out.
Once we get home I run a bath while she climbs into bed. Watching her in my home, our home, I vow to conquer any dragon foolish enough to try and destroy this fairytale. That woman will be my queen, mother to my children and I will do right by her, Amelia, and our family. No matter how high I need to build this castle, I won't let them get hurt.
Stepping into the bedroom, I just look at her. The gauzy thong she has on is pointless—and will be gone in a few seconds. Brynn looks like the queen she is, lying there. A crown of mussed crimson hair. Creamy, fair skin on the curves and lines of her hips and ass. I decided it’s time I start worshiping her properly. I go on my knees at the edge of the bed and begin to do just that.
