“Wait a second, driver.” By the time she got out, Steele was coming around the back of the car.
“What’s wrong?”
“I don’t think I should stay at the ranch. I can have him drop me at a hotel, or even—“
“You’re welcome at the ranch. We have lots of unused bedrooms, if you’re worried about propriety.” He closed her door and knocked twice on the roof, and the car took off. “If it’s uncomfortable for you, we’ll find you a hotel, okay?”
She should have brought it up earlier. He was fidgeting, anxious to see his father. “That’s fine. Let’s go in.”
He set his hand on her back and guided her to the front desk. “Angus McLairn’s room, please.”
“Mr. McLairn is in 2235.” She pointed. “Just down the hall, take the elevators to 2nd floor and go left.”
“Thank you.” They moved at a brisk pace and reached the elevators.
“Angus?” She hadn’t even known his father’s name.
“Third generation Scottish-American.” He said it with a slight brogue. “As stubborn and cantankerous as any man...” He swallowed hard.
Wrapping her arm around his waist, she supported him, physically and emotionally. “With all the prayers being sent up for him, you’ve got to believe he’ll be fine.”
The elevator doors opened and they stepped in.
“Running the ranch was too much for him. I shouldn’t have left him there alone.” He’d made similar statements during the flight, and she’d consoled him as best she could.
The doors opened and they walked down the hall to the intensive care unit.
Tracy stopped at the waiting room door. “I’ll be in here.”
“Thanks, Tracy.” His eyes scanned her face. “I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t come with me.”
She pushed up on tiptoes and kissed him. “I’m glad I could be here for you.” She gave him a soft push. “Now go, see your dad.”
He took off at a jog.
In the empty waiting room, she found a bottle of water in a small refrigerator and tucked herself into a corner.
In Tulsa, in his dressing room, she couldn’t tell him she didn’t want to come to Texas with him. It wouldn’t have been right pushing him away then. The flight was only an hour, but it seemed endless. She’d changed out of her concert clothes into jeans, a long-sleeved pink shirt, and running shoes. Steele had paced and checked his phone every few minutes. When a text would come in, he’d jump as if he’d received a shock.
All he’d found out was the hospital was running tests. They don’t know why his heart went into arrhythmia, but he was stable.
She tipped her head back against the wall, closed her eyes, and let out a huge sigh. When would be the time to tell him she was leaving? Not just Texas, but him? What if... Her mind fast-forwarded to a funeral. “God forbid.”
The sound of coffee sloshing into a paper cup came from the other side of the room.
Was it right for her to stay, knowing he was leaning on her, thinking they still had a chance at a future? Or would it be better to cut it off clean tonight? She was no good at this kind of thing. That’s why she kept her relationships casual. And brief.
“Are you Tracy?” A familiar female voice came from very near.
She looked up. A tall woman, nearly six feet tall, with dark hair and light gray eyes stood in front of her.
“I am.” She stood. “You must be Val.”
The woman nodded and they shook hands. Her eyes were red and she looked like she might fall over any second.
“Sit, please.” She gestured to a short couch. “Actually, if you’d like to lie down, I can ask someone for a pillow and blanket for you.”
Val sat on the couch and eyed it as if she relished the idea of passing out on it. “Thanks, but I’m fine.”
Tracy took a chair next to the couch. “How’s he doing?”
“We don’t know.” Her voice cracked a few times. “Tests are coming back negative, which is good, but I just want them to find something so it can be fixed.”
Tracy squeezed her hand once, quickly. “I know. I’m sure they will, but it might take time.”
“Patience, as you probably know, is not a McLairn virtue.” She attempted a smile.
“Yes, I’ve seen a little of that first-hand.” Steele, usually patient and even-tempered, could erupt and blow sky-high at any moment.
“I bet you have.” Val sipped her coffee. “I’m glad you were with him in Tulsa. Glad he wasn’t alone.”
Tracy nodded. “I hope I didn’t overstep by answering your call. When Steele’s assistant came to get me, I wasn’t sure what to do.”
“You did the right thing. I had my husband, Travis, calling the arena and trying to find Steele’s manager’s phone number or one of his assistants’ numbers.”
That brought some relief. “Reading a guy’s texts is one thing, but answering a guy’s phone is cause for immediate dismissal.”
Val laughed a couple short chuckles. “Oh yeah, we’ve all learned that the hard way.” She stared off into space for a minute, then her eyes filled with tears.
Tracy should get Val’s mind off the scary path it was evidently on. “Where are your kids?”
Val blinked a few times. “They’re with Travis’s mother. He just went to pick them up and take them home. They don’t sleep well if they’re not in their own beds.” She sucked her lips for a moment. “They were with me at the ranch when Dad collapsed.”
A jolt of sorrow pulsed through Tracy. “Oh no. Did they see?”
She shook her head. “They were in the kitchen, and I had Dad’s housekeeper take them to my in-laws house right away. I know CPR, so I monitored his pulse and breathing, but didn’t have to perform any rescue breaths or chest compressions.”
“That’s good. A good sign, I mean.” Tracy needed to take CPR. If something like this ever happened to her mother, she wanted to be as strong and competent as Val had been.
“He was on the phone with Ryder when he collapsed. Dad was getting very upset, pacing and punching his fist in the air.”
“Ryder?” Why would Angus McLairn be talking to Ryder Landry?
“Our brother, Ryder.” Val zoned out again.
“Oh, I thought you meant Ryder Landry.” Why hadn’t Steele mentioned a brother named Ryder?
She sipped her coffee. “Yes, Ryder Lan—” Her eyes opened wide and her face lost all its color. “Oh holy hell on a cracker. He didn’t tell you?”
It took Tracy a few seconds to assimilate it. Ryder Landry was Steele’s brother? And he’d never mentioned it? Now things started to make sense. Why Steele was so pissed that he had to perform at a benefit concert with Ryder. Oh, God, that’s why Steele used the word ‘bastard when he was fighting with his dad on the phone back in LA at the video shoot.
At the arena; the fight she’d overheard between the...brothers. Ryder must have called Angus, told him about his argument with Steele. Something went wrong and their father collapsed. Steele had to be feeling guilty about starting the string of events that led to Angus ending up in the hospital.
“He didn’t tell me, Val, but I promise I’ll keep it a secret. Even from Steele.”
Val sat back, her eyes wandering all over the room. “You know, I would normally say that now that the truth has come out, it’s better that Steele knows you know.” She frowned. “But with Dad the way he is right now, at least until we find out what’s going on with him...”
“It’s locked away good and tight, Val. And I won’t ask you any more questions about it.”
“Ask questions about what?” Steele stood in the doorway.
Tracy’s head jerked and her cheeks warmed. She could never hide her guilt.
Val stood. “We were talking about childbirth.” She walked to the composting station and dropped her cup in.
Steele looked between the two of them. “I’ll never understand how the female mind works.” He poured a cup of coffee. “Doctor’s in with Dad n
ow.”
“Did you talk?” Val stood next to him.
He nodded. “I know what happened.” He glanced at Tracy then back at his sister. “I’m sorry, Val.”
Tracy got up and grabbed her purse. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.” She got out of the room as fast as she could.
Behind her, someone closed the waiting room door.
****
“Don’t blame yourself, Steele.” Val squeezed his elbow and gestured to a chair. “It may have been something completely unrelated to what Ryder told Dad.”
Steele sat and rested his elbows on his legs, his head in his hands. Angus McLairn had blasted him the moment Val walked out of the room.
Angus had jabbed an angry finger at Steele. “How can you be so cruel to that boy. He told me he was done with our family. He was backing away because he saw the rift it made between you and me.”
“Dad’s ready to disown me.”
Val sat next to him and leaned her shoulder against his. “No, he’s not. He just thinks you’ve been acting like a spoiled brat for a little too long.”
He turned his head and glared at her. “This is my career we’re talking about. The money that helps keep the ranch running.”
“That’s not all you’re angry about. You’re mad that Dad cheated on Mom. Well guess what? It was twenty-eight years ago, Angus was young, dumb, and full of cum, and Mom never knew about it.”
Steele could see her point, the same thing Chase tried to tell him earlier today. His anger was with his dad, not with his half-brother. “Dad swears he didn’t know about Ryder. Do you think that’s true?”
Val nodded. “Yes, I do.”
A big portion of his anger came from doubting that Angus was unaware of Ryder until earlier this year. And the coincidence that Ryder had become friends with Steele years ago, not knowing they were related... “It’s just too unbelievable.”
“Do some research online about women who have babies and don’t tell the father. Or better yet...” Val sat back. “While he’s hooked up to all those monitors, let’s give Dad a polygraph.”
Steele snorted. “Smartass.”
“What did Dad say to you?”
“Besides yelling at me for treating Ryder like shit? He wants me to stick close to the ranch while he’s in here so he won’t worry himself into an early grave.”
She waited a few moments. “You’re going to stay, aren’t you? You’re not going back to LA.”
Shit, his sister even doubted his family loyalty. “I’m not leaving, Val. I’ll stay as long as I’m needed.”
“Guess what?”
He leaned back and looked at her.
“You’re needed here every day. We miss you. You’re working yourself too hard out there. Take a break. Maybe settle down.” She looked toward the door then back at him. “Tracy seems like a sweetheart.”
“She is.” When Val said ‘settle down,’ the first thing to flash in his brain was that image of Tracy in his bed at Big Bear holding a baby. Probably because the women had been talking about childbirth, which was the strangest thing he’d heard all day. Unless Tracy was taking Val’s mind off their dad, which would be just like his Tracy to do.
“I’d like to get more serious with her.” He didn’t mean to blurt it out, but his sister was the one person he trusted implicitly.
“But?”
“But she’s got life goals and ambitions and I can’t remember what else. Dating—especially someone like me—falls toward the bottom of her list.” He tried to smile, but it didn’t work. “I can feel her pulling away, Val, and I don’t know what to do.” Goddamn heart of his, latching on and making him sound like a whiny baby.
She tipped her head and sighed. “Maybe she’ll come around in time. How long have you been dating?” Val yawned.
“Three days.”
“Huh?” She coughed through her yawn. “Three days? And you’re already talking about a future?”
“We’ve met a few times, talked some, and worked together.” Even to him, it sounded like he was moving too fast.
“I’d guess you’re asking for too much from her, and that’s why she’s ready to bolt.”
“I don’t want to let her go.” It was selfish, but he’d keep her here any way he could.
She patted his hand. “Okay, I’ll help as much as I can.” She cleared her throat. “Be sure to open up to her. Be honest about things.” Her voice sounded odd.
He studied her face. He could tell she was hiding something. “Like what?”
“Like everything.” She stood and walked to the fridge, opened it, then slammed it shut. She spun around and glared at him. “Like Ryder, goddamn it. He’s your brother, my brother, Dad’s youngest child, and he won’t come to see Dad because he doesn’t want to make you angry.”
Steele scrubbed a hand down his face. “Aw, hell. Ryder doesn’t belong here.” It was too public. People would question his presence here and someone would start digging. “Once Dad gets home, he can visit...”
“What if Dad doesn’t come home.” Val took the chair across from him. “Doesn’t our brother deserve the opportunity to talk to his father? To say goodbye...” She broke down crying.
Steele jumped up, sat next to her, and pulled her against his chest. “Dad’s going to be okay. I can feel it.”
“What if he’s not?” She sniffled.
He pulled three tissues out of the box on the table next to him and handed them to her. “I don’t know what to say.” He could see her point, but it went against everything he felt in his gut. If this story broke...
“Shit.” That was his main concern? His goddamn reputation in the music community? When did that take priority over his family? “Does Dad want to see him?”
She nodded and blew into the tissues. “He hasn’t returned my calls. I thought at first he might be on a plane or just ignoring me since he told Dad he wasn’t part of the family any longer.” Her voice rose to a squeak and another burst of tears rolled out of her.
“Okay, it’s okay.”
“No, it’s not.” She looked at him, red-eyed and wet-cheeked. “I didn’t want to tell him over the phone, so he doesn’t know Dad is ill.”
Guilt and loyalty to his father and more guilt pressed in on him until he knew what the right thing to do was. “I’ll call him.”
She tipped her head. “You will? Oh Steele, thank you.”
“Don’t thank me, yet. The jerk might have blocked my number already.” He pulled out his phone.
Val dug in her purse. “Here’s mine, just in case you can’t get through on yours.” She handed her phone to him and headed for the door. “I’ll go check on Dad. You don’t want your sister to hear you being nice.” She gave a watery smile. “Might ruin your reputation.”
“My reputation could use a little polishing.” Especially with Tracy.
Chapter Seventeen
Steele sat in the hospital waiting room, his father’s intensive care room just yards away, but he couldn’t go back in there until he made things right with Ryder. Well, maybe not right, but a temporary truce.
His finger hesitated over the dial button next to his half-brother’s face on his phone. It wasn’t a good feeling knowing he could yell at his brother easier than he could apologize to him. How had things gotten so bad?
He pressed dial. It rang three times.
“What!” Ryder practically yelled it.
“I was wrong to say the things I said to you earlier.”
Silence.
Steele sucked in a breath. “I’m not ready for you to go public with this whole ‘family’ thing, but I didn’t mean for you to stop seeing Val and...Dad.” It was the first time he acknowledged their shared paternity.
“Is this a joke, Steele? Because you didn’t give a shit about my relationship with them a few hours ago.”
“No joke. It’s deadly serious.” He bit back the emotion that clogged his throat. “Dad collapsed tonight. He’s in intensive care and they’re running tests on h
is heart.”
“No.” It was a whisper.
“He wants to see you. Will you come?”
“It was my phone call, wasn’t it. He had a heart attack because I called.”
“He wasn’t feeling right all day.” His father had admitted it to him after Val had left the room. “It’s not your fault. Fuck, it’s my fault for keeping this damn feud going.”
“It wasn’t a feud, it was a vendetta.” Ryder sounded stronger. “I expected to be assassinated at any time.”
He let a single laugh escape him. “Why the hell didn’t I think of that?”
“Yeah, would have saved us both a lot of time.”
“Listen, I can send my jet for you if—“
“I’m in Paris. The one in Texas. I was heading home to Natchitoches. I’ll check out of the hotel and be there in a couple hours.”
Ryder’s ranch in Natchitoches, Louisiana was just getting started in the bucking horse business. His brother spent a lot of time there. A hell of a lot more time than Steele spent on his ranch.
“It’d be just as fast to send my jet.”
“Nah, I don’t want to leave my truck here.” He coughed. “And it would make me crazy sitting here doing nothing.”
“Right.”
Silence.
Steele didn’t know how to end this. “Okay. We’ll be here.”
“Yeah. Thanks. For calling.”
Too many words collided with each other in his brain but none felt right. “Yep.” He hung up. They’d find time to talk when he got here.
Val opened the door and leaned in. “Is he coming?”
He nodded. “In a couple hours.”
She knelt on the chair next to him and hugged him sideways. “Thank you.”
He rested in her arms. “I can’t promise it won’t be uncomfortable when he gets here.”
She smooched him on the temple and he pulled back. “Yuck.”
Val kissed him again then wrapped her hands around his neck, squeezing lightly. “Behave yourself, for Christ’s sake.”
Heart of Steele Page 14
