How to Love Her: McCullough Mountain (McCullough Mountain Prequel)

by Lydia Michaels

  She sighed, more of the weight taken off of her shoulders. “Thank you, Daddy.”

  “What do you got there?”

  Her hands folded the list. “Nothing. Just a list of things I’m going to need.”

  He took the paper from her and scanned over it before passing it back. “Tomorrow is actually a good day to start. I have an appointment in the morning, so I won’t be around. Estelle will be busy so you can help with the phones when she’s tied up.”

  Kate smiled, glad to know she was actually needed in the office and not just a charity case. “I’ll do my best.”

  “I’m sure you will.”

  The following day was exhausting and exhilarating. Her father wasn’t lying when he said his secretary would be extra busy in his absence. Thankfully, Estelle was very patient and didn’t flip out when Kate fought with the fax machine—for the tenth time.

  “It’s not typically like this,” Estelle reminded. “Your father usually plans ahead when he’s out and everyone has an idea of what they should be doing. Today they’re all just running around like a bunch of chickens with their heads chopped off.”

  Kate barely had a chance to eat her lunch. Every time she took a bite the phones rang, but she absolutely loved it. No matter how many debacles she came across, she knew she was doing something productive for her future and that came with great pride.

  The ride back to the house was made with a smile. Ant was coming over for dinner and she was anxious to talk to him about his first day, too. He never did come back to the lumberyard for a job. She supposed one trauma was enough. But he was smart and had no problem finding work at the hardware store in town. She was eager to hear about his first day and hoped it was as exhilarating as hers.

  As she entered the house her mom and dad were sitting at the table. “How was your first day in the workforce, Katie girl?”

  She put her lunch pail on the counter and grinned. “I didn’t ruin anything, so I’d say it was a success.”

  Her dad smiled. “Was Estelle helpful?”

  “When she could be. Things were a little hectic, but she said that’s not the norm. How was your meeting?”

  “Good.” He looked at her mother who was being uncharacteristically quiet.

  “Well, I’m going to change. These pants are cutting into my hips.”

  They both nodded. Something was off. Taking the steps, she mentally planned out what to wear to work tomorrow, thinking some elastic slacks were in her near future. She turned into her bedroom and stilled in the doorway.

  Her lips parted as she immediately noticed all the new additions. The old changing table was in the corner and stacked full of diapers. The crib from the attic sat beside it, clean and wearing a fresh coat of paint. Her mother’s rocker was also there.

  Taking a staggering step across the threshold, she drew in a stuttering breath and picked up a tiny rattle resting on her bed. The handle had a bow tied out of rope. She knew that rope. It was the twine her father always kept in his pocket when they walked the property so he could make a quick mend if a fencepost was down.

  She slowly pivoted and blinked back tears, taking inventory of all he’d done. This was where he was today, not at a meeting, but here, doing this for her and her baby. She looked inside the basket on the floor and found it packed with tiny articles of clothing. Picking up the little set of mint and lemon yellow booties, she smiled through her tears.

  “I figured getting that list checked off might help.”

  She twisted and faced her dad, his large form filling her doorway as he leaned on the jamb. She couldn’t think of anything to say. Thank you didn’t seem enough and at the moment her throat was so tight she wasn’t sure she could get a word out.

  Wiping her cheeks, she walked to him and flung her arms around him, squeezing with all her might. There was no fear she might hurt him. He was strong, hero strong, and he could take it.

  “I love you,” she rasped as he tightened his arms around her and kissed her head.

  “Love you too, Katie girl.”

  Pulling back, she wiped her eyes again and laughed. “I’ll be crying all night now.”

  He chuckled. “That’s okay. Your mother had seven kids. I’ve seen enough pregnancy tears to fill a small river. I’m used to it.”

  She laughed again. “Thank you for this. It’s… I can’t even tell you how much it means to me, not just the things, but how supportive you and Mum are being with everything.”

  He smiled softly, his eyes creasing with true affection. “That’s what family does. You’re my little girl. I’ll always do whatever I can for you.”

  “Thank you, Daddy.”

  That night, when Anthony came over, she showed him everything her parents had done. He stilled in the doorway, taken aback by all the changes.

  “Wow.” His gaze made a slow revolution around the room and he grinned. Stepping to the basket of diapers, he lifted one, making it appear even smaller in his large hand. “These are so tiny.”

  “They’re for newborns. I have ones for when he or she gets bigger, too.”

  “They got you everything.”

  It was surreal to see all these items in living color, to touch them and smell the soft scent of each delicate piece. “It sure does make everything real.”

  He glanced over his shoulder, a peculiar look in his eye as his mouth curved into a content grin. “It really does.”

  Scared yet? The words almost came out, but she held them back. Nothing in the way he touched the baby items or admired the crib showed any sign of intimidation. He put the diaper back in the basket and turned the rocker to face the bed. Lowering himself into the chair, he folded his hands between his knees and smiled at her.

  “I can picture you,” he said quietly, glancing at the changing table. “It’s weird. I can actually see you using all of these things.”

  She was still working on that, but being surrounded by so many reminders helped. “It’s going to be strange, always having to put someone else before myself.”

  “You do that anyway. It’s the kind of girl you are.”

  She’d done that with him. It was why she tried to spare him from her chaos. For the briefest moment she imagined what these items might look like in a house of her own, with Anthony’s belongings scattered in between.

  He stared off, his attention focused on the crib.

  Ant couldn’t believe how different her room looked. Everything had changed in the blink of an eye. Little items washed their world in pastels, seeming like luxuries, but these were the necessities of her future. Their future.

  He wasn’t prepared for the surge of emotion seeing these items had brought. It was a mixture of comfort and longing. He didn’t know Kate before the baby. They’d always been two, he being the person that made them three. When he thought of her, touched her, he never forgot all that she was, and that was who he loved—all of her.

  His eyes burned with the unfamiliar sensation of tears and he blinked hard to hide them away. He loved them both, her, and her unborn child. And never had he wished for a sense of entitlement as much as he did in that moment.

  Reaching across the space, he caught her fingers in his and squeezed. He’d thought to tell her of his day and ask about hers, but now, that all seemed so trivial in the grand scheme of things. “I love you.”

  Her smile gentled as she looked into his eyes. “I love you too.”

  If only she understood how much. Eventually she’d have to accept that his feelings for her didn’t come with limits and encompassed all of her, the woman she was, the child she carried, and the future she’d face. He wanted that future with her. This was just another sign that he was exactly where he was meant to be.

  As the weeks unfolded into summer, Kate fell into a sort of routine. Most nights Anthony came to her house and some nights she went to his. His sisters had lots of questions about pregnancy, but his father never made a peep whenever the baby came into conversation. His mother was a little different. She was
constantly slipping little trinkets of luck into Kate’s hands and tying red ribbons on her clothes, saying something about red keeping the Mallocchios away. Kate wasn’t very superstitious, but it seemed like a good idea to take all the good luck charms she could get.

  On the weekends she spent time with her mother, learning how to knit and together they worked on blankets and sweaters for the baby. The mountain got cold in the winter, which was when her baby was due, so she never stopped adding to her supply of warm clothing.

  Anthony often stuck around, but busied himself helping her dad fix things that needed fixing around the house. Anthony truly stole her mother’s heart the day he convinced her dad to finally fix the stove.

  When Kate’s second trimester rolled around, she was excited to have her sonogram. Her mother was joining her, which she thought was normal in her case, until she spoke to Anthony the night before.

  “Can I go?” he asked as they sat on the porch after dinner.

  “You have work.”

  “But I could leave for an hour. This is important, Kate.”

  It was important, but not necessarily important to his life. Yet, somehow he acted like her baby held every bit of significance in his world, as it did in hers. “If you want to be there, I don’t mind. But I’d understand if you weren’t.”

  “I’ll pick you up at eleven.”

  And so it was settled. As she waited in the kitchen for Ant to come pick them up her mother, wearing cleaning clothes, dragged out the mop and bucket.

  “Mum, we have to leave soon. What are you doing? Anthony’s going to be here any minute.”

  “I’m mopping this floor.”

  “But my appointment’s in twenty minutes.”

  “I know, dearie. But this is something for you and Anthony. I’m excited for you, but I don’t want to intrude on that private moment.”

  She frowned. “But I want you there.”

  “Trust me on this, Katherine. The person who should be there will be there.”

  Just then a horn honked out front. Kate stared at her mother as the door opened and Anthony stepped into the kitchen. “You ready?”

  She glanced at him and back to her mother, feeling like a little kid being permitted to cross the street alone for the first time. She collected her purse and the little appointment book the doctor’s office gave her. “You’re sure you don’t want to come?”

  Her mother nodded. “I’m sure. You bring me back a picture of my grandchild. Go on. You don’t want to be late.”

  Once they were in the car and on their way, Anthony took her hand. “You excited?”

  “Excited. Nervous. I just hope everything’s okay and the baby’s healthy.”

  “I’m sure everything will be great.” He squeezed her hand.

  Once they signed in at the doctor’s office they were shown to a room in the back. Kate changed into a patient gown and waited on the examination table as Ant scoped out the room. She was a little self-conscious about being so exposed in front of him, but he never acted like he couldn’t handle it. Strange that this was the second time he’d see her anything close to naked. As far as second dates went, this wasn’t what she had in mind.

  The doctor came in and asked her several questions. He introduced himself to Anthony and told him exactly where to stand so he could see the baby on the screen. Once they were caught up, she reclined on the table and covered her legs with a paper blanket. The doctor parted her gown and slathered her belly with cool gel.

  She glanced nervously at Ant who smiled back and whispered, “You’re really starting to show.”

  She supposed there was a big difference between now and graduation night, but he didn’t seem bothered by the changes to her body.

  The screen flipped on and their attention turned to the doctor. “There we go.”

  Her breath pulled deep, filling her lungs and sending chills down her arms. “Wow.”

  “Look at that,” Ant said, mesmerized. “That’s incredible.”

  Without thinking, she blindly reached for his hands and his fingers entwined with hers. Using her free hand, she wiped away a tear.

  “Did you want to know the sex?” the doctor asked.

  “It’s a boy,” she rasped. She didn’t have any science to base her theory on, but she had such a strong instinct she was looking at her son.

  The doctor chuckled and moved the arrow to show them the proof. “Right you are.”

  “Oh my God,” Anthony whispered, his hand squeezing a little tighter. “You’re having a boy, Katie.”

  She glanced at him and smiled when she saw the sheen of tears shimmering over his dark eyes. His gaze shifted to her and his smile widened. “That’s your son,” he whispered, voice hoarse.

  Holding on to her overwhelming emotions by a thread, she murmured, “I love you.” Her mother was right. The person who needed to be here for this moment was right by her side.

  They spent the next thirty minutes going over the images and discussing the baby’s general health, which seemed to be fine. Everything was developing on schedule and her due date was early December. Although she had over four months to go, it seemed only moments away.

  When they got back to the house her mother gushed over the images the doctor had printed for them. Though they weren’t the easiest to read, Kate loved that little blob in those pictures more than she ever thought she could love anything.

  “I have to go back to work,” Anthony said after her mother force-fed them lunch.

  She wanted to tell him so much in that moment but lacked the words to properly explain how much his unshakable presence meant to her. Wishing she could say more, she brushed her fingers over his and whispered, “Thank you for going with me today.”

  He smiled and brushed a kiss on her cheek. “Thanks for letting me be there.”

  When he left, she couldn’t wipe the smile off her face. Her mother was smiling too. “That’s a good man, Katherine. I have a feeling when he goes to college we won’t be seeing the last of him.”

  And as greedy as it was to hope that Anthony might hold a bit of his life back to suit hers, she hoped her mother was right.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Ant returned to the hardware store on cloud nine. Seeing the baby was incredible. His response might have been irrational, being that Kate’s baby wasn’t his, but he’d never felt so proud. A son. Kate was having a son.

  The bell at the front of the store jingled as he tied his apron around his waist and went to help the customers. An older man was looking for paint to match a dresser that had some chips in it and he cheerfully mixed up a quart for him.

  Just as he was finishing up the order, the bell jingled again and he kept an ear out to see what the next customer might need while bagging the paint.

  “I’ll be with you in a minute,” he called, not yet seeing the customer.

  The man rounded the corner and said, “Do you guys carry weed whacker string?”

  The second he saw who it was every pleasant feeling inside of him died. Face slack, lips numb, he mumbled, “Yeah. Aisle nine.”

  The guy nodded and disappeared in that direction. Ant waited at the register, unable to move to help the customer like he usually did. When the customer returned, string in hand, Ant had to force himself to take the order and scan it into the register.

  His hands trembled as the other man’s scent filled the air. Within a split second he’d sized up everything he disliked about him down to the way he laced his shoes. Memories of Kate’s stories came back to him. Though it had been a while since he saw her look anything but happy, he’d never forget how sad she looked the day she told him about her “friend’s” first time.

  “Don’t I know you?”

  Ant couldn’t force the customary smile he gave the other patrons. “We graduated together.”

  “That’s right. Ant Marcelli.” The sound of his voice grated over every nerve. “I didn’t know you worked here.”

  Ant didn’t comment. “That’s six seventy
-five.”

  The guy put a ten-dollar bill on the counter. “Your friends with Kate McCullough, right?”

  His shoulders tensed and he nearly lost the feather light hold he had on his temper. That he even assumed the right to speak her name pissed him off. For months the guy had acted like she didn’t exist, left her to handle so much on her own when she was damn well entitled to demand he compensate for his part. But Katie wasn’t that sort of girl. She had too much pride and more than enough independence to figure things out on her own without this piece of shit making her feel bad.

  “She’s my girlfriend.”

  All jovialness left the other man’s face and he blinked dumbly. “She’s dating?”

  Ant met his gaze, every ounce of his being seething to let loose. “I know who you are, Nick.”

  Nick’s jaw twitched, but he kept silent. Ant handed him his change.

  “I, uh…” The guy took his bag and hesitated. “Tell Kate I said I hope she’s doing okay.”

  “She’s doing fine,” Ant informed him, narrowing his eyes. “We have everything under control.” Even that little bit of assurance felt like more than the guy deserved, but Ant would be damned if he let him walk away somehow assuming she might be less without him. “She’s never been happier.” And you get no credit for that happiness, asshole.

  Nick frowned and nodded, slowly backing out of the store.

  By the time Ant’s shift was over his face hurt from grimacing. How could that guy act like he had nothing to do with a baby he created? Forget the fact that he was missing out, because that left room for Ant in Kate’s life. But didn’t he want to know about his child?

  Ant debated telling Kate that he’d run into Nick, but thought better of it. He didn’t want to stress her out. It made no difference anyway. It was clear Nick was not going to be involved or even admit the slightest responsibility for his part in their situation.

  That night they ate at his house and followed dinner with a game of Five Hundred Rummy. His parents were big gamblers and loved to play cards over coffee. Kate was so great, laughing and teasing his father. Though his dad never commented on her situation, Ant believed Kate was so lovable his dad found her pregnancy hard to hold it against them.