Pontypridd 01 - Hearts of Gold

by Catrin Collier

  They were shown to their seats by an usherette who fluttered her eyelashes and pouted seductively at Andrew. Trevor relieved them of their coats while Andrew went to the confectionery kiosk.

  ‘Do you know the cheapest seat in the stalls is two shillings?’ Laura whispered while Trevor was hanging their coats on the back of the box door. Bethan shook her head and peered over the edge of the balcony. The theatre, like Laura, was buzzing with suppressed excitement and she wished that she could relax enough to be swept up in the tide of gaiety.

  Andrew returned with two programmes and an enormous box of chocolates. Handing them to Bethan he pulled a chair up alongside hers, leaving Trevor no other option but to sit next to Laura.

  Discordant notes filled the air as the orchestra began to tune up. The curtain twitched intriguingly, the lights dimmed and a hush fell over the auditorium.

  Bethan passed the chocolates and a programme on to Trevor. Leaning forward she stole a sideways glance at Andrew under cover of the darkness. He smiled at her. Embarrassed, she looked away quickly upsetting herself with the thought that he’d probably visited hundreds of theatres before, no doubt in the company of dozens of different girls.

  Perhaps she was reading too much into the evening. It could be just as he’d said; he wanted friendship and companionship, nothing more. They’d enjoy themselves, and afterwards, when the show was over, he’d shake her hand, drop her off at the corner of Graig Avenue and that would be that. A memorable night for her, just another amusing evening for him.

  Once the orchestra struck up the opening number, and the curtain rose, she forgot her preoccupation with Andrew. Multi coloured images whirled around the stage as acrobats dressed in red and blue silk jumped on and off circling horses. The music raced, quickening to a foot tapping, pulse-racing speed. The horses circled for the last time, left as the curtain fell and a troop of performing dogs yapped in front of the footlights, accompanied by their trainer.

  To “Oohs” and “Aahs” they went through their paces until the last black and white mongrel jumped through the final hoop and the curtain rose on a tightrope act.

  Bethan leaned forward on the balcony, resting her chin on her hand, completely enthralled. Her father had taken all of them to the circus once when a touring company had pitched a tent in Pontypridd Park but it had been nothing like this.

  Human act followed animal act in bewildering variety. Monkeys, trapeze artists, camels, clowns, elephants, jugglers, a knife thrower, flame eater … they took their bows, the curtain fell, the music stopped and light flooded the auditorium.

  ‘It’s not over is it?’ she asked, blinking at the brightness.

  ‘No,’ Andrew laughed. ‘Half time.’ He rose from his seat. ‘Can I get you a drink or ice-cream?’

  ‘Ice cream if you let us pay,’ Laura said pertly.

  Trevor coloured, but Andrew held out his hand. Laura delved into her bag and produced half a crown.

  ‘Ice cream for everyone?’ Andrew asked.

  ‘Yes, please,’ Bethan answered.

  ‘I’ll help you carry them,’ Trevor offered following him out.

  ‘This is the life.’ Laura reached for the box of chocolates and popped one into her mouth.

  ‘You’d better not get too used to it. Work tomorrow.’

  ‘Don’t be a grumble-grumps and remind me.’ Laura took another chocolate. ‘Tell me, how come you get the rich handsome one when I laid claim to him first? Not that I’m complaining. Trevor is rather sweet in a little boy lost way and he does have prospects.’

  ‘Laura, we’re out with them for the evening, not heading up the aisle.’

  ‘Speak for yourself. I could do a lot worse than marry a doctor, even a poor one.’

  ‘If you want to swap seats …’

  ‘If I want to?’ Laura dug her elbow into Bethan’s ribs. ‘Where have you been looking? The eminently eligible Dr John is smitten, and alas not with me, but don’t worry, I know how to retire gracefully from the fray. And I’m suitably grateful for my consolation prize.’

  ‘Now you’re being ridiculous,’ Bethan said irritably.

  ‘Here you are, ladies.’ Andrew pushed his way into the box, his hands full of ice-cream wafers.

  ‘I feel like orphan Annie on a Christmas treat,’ Laura said, wrapping her hanky around her wafer.

  ‘You’re that hard done by?’ Andrew asked drily.

  ‘You’re a doctor, you should know. “Nurse get me this, nurse get me that, nurse bow your head the doctors are passing. Run water into the sink for him; make sure it’s not too hot, not too cold. No, not that soap, a new piece. Hold out a clean towel so he can dry his hands, and pick it up when he’s done and dropped it to the floor.ˮ’

  ‘It can’t be that bad,’ Andrew protested.

  ‘Believe me it is. You should try standing in our shoes some time,’ Laura replied.

  ‘Sorry I took so long, there was a massive queue.’ Trevor pushed his way awkwardly into the box, carrying a tray of glasses filled with orange juice.

  ‘I didn’t give you enough for orange juice,’ Laura protested. ‘Not at these prices.’

  ‘My treat,’ Trevor insisted.

  ‘In that case, thank you,’ she smiled and took a glass.

  Andrew took the tray from Trevor and handed Bethan a glass as he returned to his seat. ‘I take it you’re enjoying the show.’

  ‘It’s wonderful.’ She hesitated, seeing a mocking glint in his eye.

  ‘Chocolate, before Trevor and Laura eat them all?’ he asked, taking the box and putting it on the balcony next to her.

  ‘No, thank you.’

  ‘You don’t like chocolates?’ he asked incredulously.

  ‘Not very much,’ she admitted.

  ‘What do you like?’

  ‘Oranges. I love oranges.’

  ‘In that case you must marry me. I have this horror of middle-aged fat ladies who eat too many chocolates.’

  ‘Ssh!’

  The hissing came from the neighbouring box as the lights dimmed and the band started playing. The curtain rose on a fenced in stage.

  Laura grabbed Trevor’s arm as an immense tiger prowled towards the footlights. The creature lunged forward and rattled the bars and a couple of women in the front stalls screamed.

  ‘You can hold my hand if you’re afraid,’ Andrew teased.

  Bethan ignored his offer, but noticed that Laura was still pressing her cheek against Trevor’s shoulder.

  The second half passed even more quickly than the first. A whirl of tigers, more clowns when the cage was being dismantled, Cossack dancers, more ponies, this time accompanied by Cowboys and Indians, a snake-charmer, a balancing act and eventually the grand finale. But no matter how vigorously she and the rest of the audience clapped, cheered and called for encores, all they got was another bow from the performers.

  ‘Supper?’ Andrew enquired helping her on with her coat.

  ‘I should get back,’ she said doubtfully. ‘My parents think I’m at the Palladium.’

  ‘It’s only ten o’clock; I’ll have you back by twelve I promise.’

  She looked to Laura, hoping for moral support, but Laura and Trevor were already discussing the merits of one café as opposed to another.

  ‘As long as we go straight to Pontypridd afterwards,’ she relented.

  Supper was a bottle of wine and an omelette in a small cafe close to the dock area, and by the welcome they received, it was obvious that Andrew and Trevor had both been there before.

  True to his word, as soon as their plates were cleared and the wine bottle emptied Andrew drove to Pontypridd. This time Laura sat in the back with Trevor, leaving the front seat free for Bethan. Bethan saw only two houses with the lamps lit as they travelled up the Graig hill, and even those lamps were in the bedrooms.

  She gripped the front of her seat nervously, hoping that her mother hadn’t taken it into her head to wait up for her, or worse still, come out on to the doorstep to greet her.

&n
bsp; Andrew steered up High Street into Llantrisant Road, and bypassing the turning to Graig Avenue, he stopped the car at the end of Danycoedcae Road.

  Trevor stepped out and opened the door on Laura’s side.

  ‘If you don’t mind, I’ll get out here too,’ Bethan said as she struggled with the door handle.

  ‘I thought you lived in Graig Avenue?’ Andrew waved goodnight to Laura.

  ‘I do.’

  ‘Then I’ll drive you down. I can always come back for Trevor.’

  ‘The road isn’t made up on Graig Avenue. It would play havoc with your car.’

  ‘Doctors make house calls on all kinds of roads, so one more rough surface won’t make any difference.’

  ‘You’d wake the neighbours.’

  He looked at her, trying to decipher her features under the indistinct light of the street lamps. ‘You’re ashamed to be seen with me?’ he asked.

  ‘Not ordinarily,’ she tried to make light of her reluctance, ‘but it is nearly twelve o’clock.’

  ‘Oh dear, don’t tell me, you’re about to turn into a pumpkin.’

  ‘No.’ She struggled to keep her rising irritation in check. ‘I have a family and neighbours who may resent being woken up by a car engine at this time of night.’

  ‘In that case I’ll walk you home.’

  ‘No, really, please, I don’t want you to go to any trouble.’

  ‘No trouble, I assure you, and as you won’t let me drive you it’s the least I can do. Besides, your family really would have cause for complaint if I allowed you to walk home alone at this hour.’ He turned off the engine and dimmed the lights.

  She left the car. The air was bracing on this part of the mountain, even in summer. Now, it sliced through their overcoats like the cutting edge of an icicle.

  He called out softly to Trevor. ‘I won’t be long.’

  Bethan turned up her collar and walked across to the footpath that led down to Iltyd Street.

  ‘Wouldn’t it be better to go by the main road?’ he suggested as he joined her.

  ‘It’s much quicker this way.’

  ‘I don’t doubt that it is, but I’d rather not break my neck.’

  ‘The path is quite straightforward. Here –’ Without thinking she held out her hand. ‘Just be careful when you step over this rock. It’s the only one the boys couldn’t move.’

  He intertwined his gloved fingers with hers, and hung on to them as they walked down the dark hillside. He didn’t let go, even when the lights of Iltyd Street burned overhead. Hands locked, huddled into their coats, they walked quickly, crossing into Graig Avenue and the shadow of the wall of Danygraig House.

  ‘That’s it, there,’ she whispered. All the houses were in darkness. The cost of heating and lighting ensured that most Graig people went to bed early. Even on Saturday nights.

  He looked up at the twin bays. The square of etched glass above the door, and the upstairs bedroom windows were in darkness.

  ‘Everyone in bed?’ he whispered.

  ‘I hope so,’ she said fervently, not wanting to explain that they lived in the back kitchen.

  He held her hand briefly. ‘Thank you, Bethan, for a lovely evening.’ For once she could detect no hint of mockery in his voice.

  ‘No, it’s I who should be thanking you.’ She hesitated, expecting a kiss, a fumbling hand beneath her coat after all the money he’d spent on her.

  ‘I’m glad you enjoyed it. I hope you and Laura will join us again sometime.’

  ‘I’d like to.’

  ‘Good.’

  He glanced up at the star-studded, clear night sky. ‘I must come up here more often. I never knew the stars shone so brightly over the Graig Mountain.’

  ‘There’s no smoke to cloud the sky because we can’t afford to keep the fires in all night’

  ‘That’s what I like about you, Bethan, you’re so prosaic’

  Unsure what he meant, she didn’t answer. He bent his head and brushed his lips lightly across her forehead, so lightly that afterwards, she wondered if he’d kissed her at all.

  ‘Goodnight.’

  He turned to face the wind and walked away. She watched his dark figure merge into the shadows around the corner. Then, crossing the road she mounted the steps to her front door.

  The evening had ended as she’d hoped. With him leaving without making a pass, groping beneath her coat or creating a scene. All the things that Glan would have done as a matter of course. He hadn’t even tried to set a date for another outing, just a vague, “I hope you and Laura will join us again sometime.”

  But then, it didn’t matter, did it? She’d had a good time. Seen the circus from a box she could never have afforded. Ridden in a car. Eaten supper in a cafe late at night.

  Drunk her first glass of wine with a meal.

  Andrew John had treated her to an absolutely perfect evening. Given her a taste of a glittering, sparkling world she thought she’d never experience. She should be feeling on top of the world.

  Instead she felt unaccountably depressed, restless and angry. Angry with him for introducing her to something she could never have and for ending their relationship before it had even begun.

  Chapter Six

  ‘And just where do you think you’ve been until this hour, young lady?’

  ‘Sorry, I know it’s late, Mam. Laura and I …’

  ‘That was Laura who walked you home was it?’ Elizabeth sneered. ‘Taking to wearing men’s clothes, has she?’

  ‘Mam, if you’ll let me explain …’

  ‘There’s nothing to explain. I know exactly what you’ve been doing, my girl. I can smell the drink on you from here.’ Elizabeth’s face darkened with a contemptuous, naked anger that Bethan had witnessed only a few times in her life.

  ‘I had a glass of wine with my supper,’ she retorted defensively.

  ‘Wine is it? I suppose you think wine is one step up from beer?’ Elizabeth’s voice rose precariously close to hysteria as she followed Bethan down the hall into the back kitchen. ‘Do you think it’s any better to be a rich man’s whore than a poor man’s?’

  ‘Mam!’ Bethan whirled around and faced her mother only to see her father standing in the passageway behind them. They’d been so wrapped up in their quarrelling they hadn’t even heard him come down the stairs.

  ‘That’s enough, Elizabeth.’ Evan advanced towards them bare-chested, his trouser belt hanging at his waist, his shirt flapping loosely on his arms.

  ‘Look at her! Just look at her!’ Elizabeth screeched. ‘Your darling daughter. The whore!’

  ‘I said that’s enough, Elizabeth,’ he repeated sternly. He turned to Bethan. ‘Go to bed, girl. Now,’ he commanded.

  ‘That’s right. Send your little darling to bed,’ Elizabeth mocked. ‘We all know she can do no wrong in your eyes. Your little darling … the whore,’ she hissed, repeating the word, conscious of the effect it was having on Evan. ‘My father always said that colliers, not the devil, invented whores. Well, collier or not, Evan Powell, I’ll not have a whore under my roof. I’m telling you now …’ she ranted, pointing at Bethan. ‘Get her out, or I’ll put her out. She’s no daughter of mine.’

  ‘You don’t know what you’re saying, woman.’ Evan pushed himself between her and Bethan.

  ‘Oh yes I do, and she goes …’

  ‘That suits me fine,’ Bethan shouted, goaded to breaking point.

  ‘I’ll pack my bags now.’

  ‘Don’t be silly, love. Where would you go at this hour?’ her father said testily.

  ‘She can go back to wherever she’s been until now.’

  ‘For Christ’s sake, woman, shut up.’ Evan turned fiercely on Elizabeth.

  ‘Don’t worry, Dad. I’m going.’

  Bethan saw her parents through a red haze of anger that had been slow in coming but smouldered all the fiercer for its tardiness.

  ‘Just remember one thing,’ she flung the worst thing she could think of in her mother’s face, ‘I did
n’t ask to come back here. You begged me because you couldn’t make ends meet. I can have a place in a nurses’ hostel any time for the asking. And I’ll be a damned sight better off.’

  ‘Bethan.’

  The cry came not from her mother, but her father.

  Her hand flew to her mouth. ‘Dad,’ she whispered. ‘Dad, I’m sorry, I never meant …’

  ‘See,’ Elizabeth crowed. ‘See what an ungrateful wretch you’ve spawned.’

  ‘Go to bed, Bethan.’ Evan leaned wearily against the door frame so she could pass him in the narrow doorway.

  ‘I didn’t mean …’ the words died on Bethan’s lips. Her father wasn’t looking at her. He was staring at her mother, a strange expression in his eyes. Head down, she ran along the passage and up the stairs.

  Haydn and Eddie were sitting side by side on the top step, hunched and shivering in the nightgowns Elizabeth had patched together from Evan’s old shirts.

  ‘What’s happening, Beth?’ Haydn whispered.

  ‘Nothing.’ She brushed past him tearfully.

  ‘Noisy nothing,’ Eddie said tactlessly.

  She slammed the bedroom door on them.

  ‘Beth?’ Maud’s voice echoed sleepily from the dark lumpy shadow that was the bed.

  ‘Go to sleep,’ Bethan ordered, banging her ankle painfully in the blinding darkness. She almost fell on to her side of the bed and began to undress, allowing her clothes to fall any shape on to the floor. Fumbling beneath her pillow she finally found her nightdress and pulled it over her head before she stole between the sheets. Tensing her body she tried to listen to what was happening downstairs.

  At first Maud’s heavy breathing seemed to drown out all the other noises of the house. But then she heard the boys blunder their way back to their bedroom. Still listening intently she lay awake until the first cold fingers of dawn crept through the thick curtains lightening the shadows from black to grey.

  No other sound reached her during those hours. No voice was raised in the kitchen, and no foot stepped on to the stairs.