Book Read Free

Up the Down Staircase

Page 17

by Bel Kaufman


  Can’t–Miss Barrett is looking this way! C.

  She’s alright. A.

  I think you hate her. C.

  You’re nuts! A.

  She likes Barringer. C.

  You’re nuts! A.

  Do you think she’s sexy? C.

  She’s not even married. A.

  Don’t be a dope! C.

  She’s cute looking. A.

  You hate her. C.

  You’re nuts. I like the way she smiles … it’s not put on. A.

  You hate her anyway. Did you do ex. 9? What does X equal? C.

  5.3 gallons. A.

  How did you get it? C.

  It’s in the back of the book. A.

  Oh, my beloved … Only know me … Understand me … The first time I walked into 309 my heart told me it was fated to be … When you looked at me …. No one else in the World understands this feeling deep within me except you … my only love … If only … Last Sunday I took the subway to your

  Carole–Do you like her dress? Miss Barrett’s. The color. Alice

  It’s sexy looking. Carole

  She uses too much make up. A.

  Only Lipstick. She likes Barringer. C.

  You’re ruining my note-book …. A.

  You started it. C.

  Because we’re sitting alphabetical … No one else is behind me. A.

  You must be a genius, you know Blanca comes after Blake! C.

  Whisper instead. A.

  Note to myself: Look up T. Elliot, a poet.

  Look up word darkling.

  Je veux tu veux il veut

  nous voulons vous voulez ils

  Assignments: Math–p. 51 ex. 3

  p. 60 ex. 1, 7, 10

  French–Traduizes 2nd paragr. and review verbs for test (Be absent!)

  Physics–??? Manheim forgot to give assignment again!!!

  (Put in my Diary about seeing Paul & Barrett in Coffee Shoppe & the anguish of it … Also how he held the door open for me and how his sleeve touched my arm … How to describe the ecstacy of it? …. )

  Get–3 different note-books. In math he wants hard cover 6 by 4 and with no lines and in pencil only. In Eng. must be loose-leaf 8 by 10 and French cahier she wants soft cover for verbs. In Soc. Studies–different color tabs.

  “April is the cruellest month …” (Look up for myself & memorize)

  A+ = 98-100 (Fat chance!)

  A = 94-97

  A– = 90-93

  D = 66-69

  F = 0-65

  When will the bell ring? Carole

  What’s your hurry? Alice

  This Home Room is cruddy. C.

  You’re nuts. A.

  This whole school is cruddy. C.

  The boys are cruddy. Especially Farone. A.

  He’s crazy about Barrett. C.

  You’re nuts. Don’t scribble in my book. A.

  The books they make us read in school are cruddy!

  Sale of Two Titties

  Silly Ass Marner

  Reminder: Open School Day Thurs. (Tell ma not to come!)

  Did you ever think, like on a subway platform you see some one and maybe they’re just the one for you but he’s going the wrong way in the train? And you never meet? Alice

  Do you believe in Fate? Carole

  In Kismet I do. A.

  Me too. C.

  Conjugate

  Ecrivez en francais

  Look up & be prepared to discuss McCarran Bill

  Love–Hate–Friendship–Marriage

  Alice Blake–Marriage

  Pauly Barringer–comes out Marriage too!!!

  Mrs. Pauly Barringer. Alice Barringer

  Mrs. Alice B. Barringer

  Barringer, Alice

  List of my Best Books:

  1. This is My Beloved

  2. Catcher in the Rye

  3. Love Poems of the Ages

  4. Marriage Manuel

  5. Zen

  New moons, darks of the moon

  Full moons–watch for full moon and write poetry!

  My birthday–Taurus the Bull. Paul’s birthday?

  April birthstone–diamond. Flower–sweet pea.

  May birthstone–emerald. Flower–lilly of the valley.

  They’re always interrupting when she talks to us. Are you buying a ticket for the Thanksgiving Dance from Kagan? Alice

  Who elected Harry Kagan anyhow? He’s a pain in the ass. Carole

  He’s a fat pain in the ass. Are you going? A.

  He’s a big fat pain in the ass. Frank is taking me. Are you going? C.

  Every day you’re ruining my note-book! A.

  You started it. C.

  My height–5 ft. 2 in.

  My weight–should be 110, is 112

  Color hair–brownette

  Color eyes–gray-blue or blue-gray

  My name My address My telephone My next of kin My school My Home Room Teacher My blood type My allergies My favorite color My lucky number My likes My dislikes

  Calories: Bacon 95 cal.

  hamburg 245

  baked pot. 145

  ice cream (vanilla) 200

  coke 80

  pizza–?

  Note to myself–Improve posture. Look up darkling.

  World’s largest cities Tokyo London N.Y.

  World’s best dressed woman

  World’s best movie stars

  Oh, my beloved, if you but knew … I am so near, and yet so far … in this very room, a heart-throb away … So ready … so ready for you & all you stand for … Last Sunday I took the subway to your stop (Your address is on the Time Card) and I walked back & forth across the street from your house … back and forth … just to see where you live. For a moment I saw you in the window …. But perhaps it wasn’t even you. My heart was throbbing with love and sadness … If I could die for you! … Like the Lady of Shalot you read to us, floating dead on the river under his window, and Lancelot never knowing … never knowing … saying only “She has a lovely face, the Lady of Shalot …”

  I wonder if I’ll ever dare to give you this letter … for you to take into your hand … My Real Self in your keeping … Maybe then you will look upon me and know me … know me!!!! “Alice”, you would say–“lovely Alice, the first time you walked into Room 309 I felt it … It was meant to be …” Paul, my beloved, I feel it too and my pulses are throbbing with all that is inside me. Remember when you held the door open for me and my elbow touched your suit?

  Sometimes I feel I’m the only person in the World or even the Universe … There’s no one but I and I want to jump up to the sky higher and higher and throw my arms and yell like I’m crazy or maybe cry and weep … I don’t know what it is but I can’t bear it. “I am half sick of shadows, said the Lady of Shalot ….” That morning when you were talking to Miss Barrett in the Coffee Shoppe I wanted to die or kill her, although she’s a very nice teacher. In my bed at night I pray to the ceiling, Dear Ceiling, make him love me or notice me in class where I sit … Make me worthy of him … Make him take me in his bold and throbbing embrace! … When I look at the cracks in the ceiling and how ugly everything is I think it’s unreal, my house and my parents … Real life is someplace else … on moonlit terraces … in tropic gardens … foreign cities … darkling woods …. We are standing on a darkling hill together and your hungry lips seek

  Acetalyn in water plus what?

  Potassium

  Oxalic acid

  Boyles Law

  My Spelling Demons–

  Write in note-book three times, neatly in ink:

  alright

  alright

  alright

  Je me porte tres bien et vous?

  Merci. Je aussi.

  Note to myself–Rewrite letter to Barringer on new pink stationary, use best handwriting and put in his letter-box. I dare me!

  Tues. Assembly postponed to Wed. Music program. Listen courteously. No stamping of feet for
applause.

  Quotation marks when talk to a person

  No quotation marks when talk to a thing (indirect)

  Bring money for Scholastic. (Get from WHO?????????)

  Carole–What did I miss yesterday? Alice

  Dr. God E. Clarke gave a speech. Same thing. And Dr. Bastard observed us in English and we missed half of Physics because of Shelter Drill. You didn’t miss a thing. Carole

  Guest Speaker on Vocations for Young People:

  Archeology

  Diatetics

  Forestry

  Law

  Medicine

  Millinery

  Refrigeration

  Religious Work

  Teaching

  Dearly Beloved … Last Sunday when I took the subway to your stop, little did you know

  Note to myself: don’t forget skirt & shoemaker

  Put letter in P.B.’s Box tomorrow and be absent!

  Alice Blake Barringer–A.B.B.

  (A.B.–same initials as before marriage!!!!)

  Carole–Did you do Totalitarian Countries? Alice

  McHabe is a Dictator! Carole

  He’s a crud. A.

  Pastorfield is a crud. She’s crazy about you know who!C.

  But he’s only a kid in her class! A.

  What the diff? She’s desparate! C.

  I thought Bob was Linda’s boy-friend. A.

  One of hers. She’s crazy. C.

  She’s alright. A.

  I think P.B. is crazy about S.B. C.

  You’re nuts! And stop writing in my book! A.

  Dearest Beloved, My heart is throbbing with the loneliest

  American Labor Party

  Laissez-Faire Capitalism

  If X = 2Y/4 what does

  Note to myself: Stop carrying it around and Do It!!!

  Alice–What’s the matter with you? Were you sick when you left the room? Carole

  I had to go down to the Letter Boxes & get something back. Alice.

  Did you? C. It was too late. A.

  Oh my God, dear God, what did I do! He’s got my letter now … My soul lies naked in his hands … I’ll die … I’ll just die … … ….

  Answer the following questions at the end of the chapter

  INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

  FROM: H. Pastorfield, Room 307

  TO: S. Barrett, Room 304

  Dear Sylvia,

  Can you spare some chalk?

  What’s all the commotion outside?

  Henrietta

  * * *

  INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

  FROM: Mary Lewis, Main Office

  TO: S. Barrett, Room 304

  Sylvia–How awful! How perfectly awful! We’ve never had anything like this since I’ve been here.

  Where is Paul? His time card is punched in, but no one can find him. How awful that it happened in his room!

  Mary

  (The office is Bedlam. Finch is in hysterics–never saw her like this before!)

  * * *

  INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

  FROM: Marcus Manheim, Room 306

  TO: Sylvia Barrett, Room 304

  Dear Miss Barrett,

  They need me as a witness, although I didn’t really see it–I was just passing by 309. If you’re not teaching, can you cover my class for a few minutes while I sign the papers and forms? Thank you.

  S. Manheim

  * * *

  FROM: JAMES J. MCHABE, ADM. ASST.

  TO: ALL TEACHERS

  ALL TEACHERS AND STUDENTS WILL PLEASE REMAIN IN THEIR ROOMS, DISREGARDING THE BELLS, UNTIL THE AMBULANCE ARRIVES.

  JJ MCH

  * * *

  Dear Miss Barrett,

  Please send down Health Card for Alice Blake–Urgent!

  Do you have any blank Accident Reports? I’m all out–Urgent!

  Do you know where Mr. Barringer is?–Urgent!

  Frances Egan

  School Nurse

  * * *

  INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

  FROM: 508

  TO: 304

  Dear Syl–

  It’s ghastly, I know, but try to keep the kids busy.

  Can you reach Paul? It seems she left a letter for him on his desk.

  Bea

  * * *

  FROM: JAMES J. MCHABE, ADM. ASST.

  TO: ALL TEACHERS

  AN UNFORTUNATE INCIDENT HAS OCCURRED. YOU ARE REQUESTED NOT TO DISCUSS IT WITH ANY POLICE OFFICERS IN THE BUILDING OR ANY OUTSIDERS. WE MUST NOT ALLOW THE PUBLIC IMAGE OF OUR SCHOOL TO BE DISTORTED UNDER STRESS.

  JJ MCH

  * * *

  Dear Miss Barrett,

  Please initial the entry: “Jumped or fell” over the red line on the enclosed PRC for Blake, Alice.

  You will note that her CC’s for the last 4 terms indicate excellent adjustment:

  Term 1:Nice & helpful

  “2:Leadership potential

  “3:Reliable–blackboard monitor

  “4:Lovely girl–polite

  It’s most atypical for a girl with her stable PPP to have done what she did, but there are factors beyond our control.

  Ella Friedenberg

  Guidance Counselor

  * * *

  Dear Miss Barrett,

  Please fill out the enclosed Emergency Form:

  CHECK ONE: PARENT OR GUARDIAN

  REACHED

  NOT REACHED

  BY TELEPHONE

  BY TELEGRAM

  TO: PARENT OR GUARDIAN OF __________________________

  WE REGRET TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR

  SON ____________________________

  DAUGHTER ___________________________

  * * *

  INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

  FROM: 508

  TO: 304

  Dear Syl–

  Anything I can do?

  Bea

  * * *

  FROM: JAMES J. MCHABE, ADM. ASST.

  TO: ALL TEACHERS

  YOU ARE REQUESTED NOT TO OBSTRUCT ANY INFORMATION THE POLICE WISH TO HAVE, PROVIDED YOU WERE A DIRECT WITNESS TO THE OCCURRENCE, IN WHICH CASE YOU ARE TO REPORT TO THE OFFICE AT ONCE.

  JJ MCH

  * * *

  INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

  FROM: H. Pastorfield, Room 307

  TO: S. Barrett, Room 304

  Dear Sylvia,

  What’s the latest? Did Paul show up yet? I understand she left him a love letter! That’s what happens when sex drives are repressed. This whole business should be aired out in the open!

  Henrietta

  * * *

  FROM: JAMES J. MCHABE, ADM. ASST.

  TO: ALL TEACHERS

  THE NEXT TWO PERIODS WILL BE SHORTENED TO 38 MINUTES EACH, TO MAKE UP FOR THE LONG 1ST PERIOD DUE TO THE UNFORTUNATE INCIDENT.

  TO PREVENT IRREGULARITIES IN THE FUTURE, TEACHERS MUST REDOUBLE THEIR VIGILANCE AT ALL TIMES. NO ROOM IS TO BE LEFT UNCOVERED AT ANY TIME, WHEN NOT IN USE.

  JJ MCH

  * * *

  Disregard bells.

  Sadie Finch

  School Clerk

  * * *

  TELEPHONE MESSAGE

  FOR: Miss Barrett, 304

  In answer to your call, Hospital called back to say no change in condition.

  * * *

  Dear Miss Barrett,

  If you’re free, can you relieve me in the Health Office for a while? I must lie down someplace.

  Frances Egan

  School Nurse

  * * *

  INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

  FROM: Mary Lewis, Main Office

  TO: S. Barrett, Room 304

  Dear Sylvia–

  Paul just breezed in!

  Guess who’s been punching him in every morning?–Sadie Finch!

  Mary

  * * *

  Dear Miss Barrett,

  It has been a great shock to all of us, particularly to
those who, like you, knew the child. If you wish to be excused from your classes, I shall be glad to take them over.

  Sincerely,

  Samuel Bester

  * * *

  Sylvia!

  Just stepped into a hornet’s nest.

  I am the villain of the melodrama.

  Was I supposed to encourage a neurotic adolescent?

  My real crime seems to be that I wasn’t in my room the first period–even though I have no class. How could I know she would walk in and do it?

  They tell me her fall was broken by the ledge below the window. Thank God for small mercies!

  She left me a note full of dots and renunciation. It had to do with a love letter she had sent me, which I handled in the only way possible.

  I can use a drink.

  Meet me for lunch?

  Paul

  * * *

  FROM: JAMES J. MCHABE, ADM. ASST.

  TO: ALL TEACHERS

 

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