Cooper By The Gross (All 144 Cooper Stories In One Volume)

by Bill Bernico

  “You still there?” Matt said into his phone.

  “Still here,” Gloria answered. “What’s he doing now?”

  “I don’t know,” Matt said. “He hopped a fence and went into the trees. You don’t suppose he’s got two million dollars buried in that clump of trees, do you?”

  “There’s one way to find out,” Gloria said. “Let’s just wait for him to come out again. If he doesn’t have the shovel with him, but he is carrying a large suitcase, then yes, I’d say that’s what he came here for. We’ll just have to sit tight and see for ourselves.”

  After thirty minutes, Matt came back on the phone. “Are you monitoring your receiver?” he said.

  “I almost forgot about it,” Gloria said. “I’ll turn it back on.” A few seconds later she said, “What the…? He’s on the move again. The little red light is moving and the green light indicates that he’s heading north.”

  “Stay with him, Mom,” Matt said. “I’ll be right behind you. Keep me updated on your whereabouts.”

  Gloria pulled out onto the street again and turned north on Armstrong Avenue, the tiny red light still blinking. She stayed on Armstrong and eventually came out on Rowena, where she spotted Booth getting into the back seat of a black sedan. She didn’t see if he had been carrying anything with him. He could have tossed a suitcase into the back seat ahead of him, but she couldn’t be sure. She relayed this information to Matt and stayed a safe distance behind the car. Eventually it turned south on Hyperion and kept going at the posted speed. Hyperion eventually became Fountain Avenue. The sedan stayed on Fountain and turned north on Western Avenue. Now Gloria was back in her element again. Hollywood Boulevard was just six or seven blocks north of where she was now.

  “Where is he now, Mom?” Matt asked over the phone.

  “The sedan just turned west on Hollywood,” she said. “I’m going to back off. Don’t want them making me. Pull ahead of me and take over. I’ll be continuing west on a parallel street. Keep me notified of their location.”

  “I’m on it,” Matt said, as his car passed Gloria’s in the inside lane. Gloria turned south and then west again on Sunset. Fifteen minutes later Matt called back to Gloria. “I’m still with them and they just passed Highland. It looks like they’re heading for Laurel Canyon.”

  “Perfect,” Gloria said. “I’m three blocks ahead of your location on Sunset. I’ll try to pick them up if they turn north. Then you can back off again.”

  Gloria made it to Hollywood and Laurel Canyon just seconds ahead of the black sedan. It did indeed turn north on Laurel Canyon Boulevard and she stayed with them, while Matt fell in several cars behind her. They continued winding up into the mountains on this twisting road. Matt lost sight of Gloria after several turns and got back on the phone.

  “Where are you now?” Matt said.

  “Just south of Mulholland and…” Gloria broke off. “Wait a minute. They’re turning west onto Mulholland. Don’t get too close. I’ll watch ‘em and see where they go.” Gloria didn’t make it through the red light and waited as the black sedan disappeared around a corner and out of sight. She quickly checked her receiver again and the tiny red light was moving again. When the traffic signal turned green again Gloria turned west, trying to catch up to the black sedan. She made a series of turns as she twisted further up into the mountains. About a mile further down the road where there were no houses, Gloria thought she saw the black sedan up ahead and slowed her car down, not wanting to catch up to it. From where she stopped she could see the sedan. It had pulled to the side of the road and the back door opened long enough for Gloria to see something being thrown out of it before the car sped away again.

  Gloria continued west until she got to the spot where the black sedan had stopped. She stopped, got out and looked down the side of the mountain. She saw what had been thrown from the sedan. It was a large suitcase and it was hanging open, empty. She got back into her car and drove on. “They dumped the empty suitcase,” Gloria told Matt. “You’d better get ahead of me again.”

  The words had no sooner left her mouth when Matt’s car pulled up behind hers. Gloria slowed down and allowed Matt to pass her. She took up her position behind Matt’s car. A few moments later Matt came back on the phone. “I see them now. They’re a hundred yards ahead of me and they’ve got their turn signal on. Looks like they’re turning left onto Coldwater Canyon. Gees, how much further do these guys think…?” Matt paused. “Hold on, they just turned into a driveway on the right. There’s a Coldwell Banker realtor’s sign out front. I don’t see any place near here where we can park without being noticed. I’m turning around. I thought I saw a small wayside where we could leave the cars and try to get closer on foot.”

  “I see you now,” Gloria said as she approached the fork in the road. She pulled her car up behind Matt’s and the two of them got out. Gloria looked down at her receiver, turning around to orient herself with the red dot on the screen. “Come on, Matt,” she said. “They’re close.”

  *****

  It was nearly four o’clock and Elliott hadn’t heard a word from Gloria or Matt since Matt had called him from Coldwater Canyon. He let his dad know that he and Gloria were following the two suspects on foot now. That was nearly an hour ago and Elliott was beginning to get worried. He paced back and forth within the office, occasionally stopping to stare out the window down onto Hollywood Boulevard. After another ten minutes of pacing Elliott turned on the desktop radio that sat in the corner, on top of the tiny refrigerator.

  He twisted the channel knob and stopped when he heard a newscaster’s voice. “And we’ll have more on that shooting in Coldwater Canyon that left at least one person dead and another person in critical condition during our five o’clock report.” The radio switched to a DJ who started to announce the next song when Elliott switched off the radio.

  Elliott thought he could feel his heart stop for a moment and he stood there, unable or unwilling to digest the information he’d just gotten from the radio. His mouth was dry and he blinked a few times before it occurred to him to call Lieutenant Anderson at the twelfth precinct. He had the receiver in his hand and was about to dial Eric’s number when the office door opened and Eric stepped in. His eyes met Eric’s as he stepped closer to him.

  Elliott had a good idea why Eric had shown up at this particular moment, and the feeling in his gut left him hollow. He looked at Eric and let out the breath he’d been holding. “Which one?” he said, his heart sinking while he waited for Eric’s answer. Without hesitation and without any emotion in his voice, Eric said, “Both of them.” Just like that--so matter-of-factly, like it was something he said every day to a man he’d known for so many years. His flat affect surprised Elliott. Eric had just blurted it out without preamble or preparation.

  “Both of them?” Elliott said. “Both dead?”

  “Yup,” Eric said. “That should teach them.”

  Elliott’s eyes got wide as he clenched his fist, ready to give Eric an uppercut just to shut him up. He cocked his fist and was about to deliver his five-finger objection when Eric leaned back, out of his way.

  “What’s the matter with you, Elliott?” Eric said. “I never thought you’d react like this.”

  Elliott was almost yelling now. “How’d you expect me to react when you give me news like this as if you’re describing the weather. I know you don’t have a wife and son so you couldn’t possibly imagine how I feel.”

  Suddenly Eric got it and he held up both palms in defense. “Hold on, Elliott,” Eric said. “I don’t think we’re on the same page here. I heard part of that broadcast from your radio as I was walking toward your office door. I thought you knew. Gloria and Elliott are fine. It’s the other two guys, the ones they were following. They’re the two who were shot. Oh, Elliott, I’m so sorry for the misunderstanding.”

  Elliott’s face went blank and he found himself at a loss for words. His eyes welled up and tears ran down his cheeks. He nearly collapsed and would have if Eric
had not caught him. Eric helped him over to the leather sofa against the wall and leaned him back into the soft folds. Eric grabbed a water glass off a shelf above the sink, filled it with water and brought it over to Elliott, who sipped from it and handed it back. He wiped his eyes and leaned forward, his head between his legs. He was still having trouble breathing without convulsing. Eric sat next to him and grabbed the back of Elliott’s neck, massaging it.

  After a while Elliott was able to compose himself again and looked at Eric. “What happened?” he said.

  “As far as we can tell,” Eric began, “Gloria and Matt had left their cars on the side of the road and were following Booth and another man by the name of Elwood Larkins, who had picked Booth up in the Silver Lake neighborhood and had driven him up into the mountains. Apparently Matt had approached the house from one end, with Gloria coming in from the other side. At that moment both men came back out of the house, each of them going in different directions. When Booth came around the corner, he almost ran into Matt coming the other way. Larkins didn’t see Gloria, who had stayed out of sight up to this point. When he came around his corner, he heard a scuffle and saw Matt wrestling with Booth and just began firing. Larkins missed Matt and hit Booth in the back of the head, killing him instantly. Larkins was about to shoot again at Matt when Gloria shot him first. She was just trying to disable him and went for his shoulder, but he turned at the last moment and took one in the lungs. He hung on for a while but at last report, I was told he died.”

  “But Matt and Gloria are all right?” Elliott said anxiously.

  “Matt’s face is a bloody mess, but none of the blood is his,” Eric said. “He just caught some spray from Booth’s wound. Gloria didn’t even wrinkle her blouse.”

  “Where are they?” Elliott said. “I’ve got to see them right away.”

  “That’s kind of why I’m here,” Eric said. “They’re probably just pulling into the precinct parking lot by now. Come on, you can ride with me to the station. Gloria will give you a lift after we’re finished getting statements from her and Matt.”

  Eric helped Elliott to his feet and nudged him toward the office door.

  Elliott backed off. “Let me wash my face first,” he said, stepping over to the sink and splashing water on his face. He rubbed it in and then grabbed the towel hanging next to the sink. Once he had himself composed and straightened up again, he followed Eric out of the office and down to the parking lot.

  Just outside the precinct’s front door, Elliott took a deep breath, let it out and walked in. Down the hall in one of the interrogation rooms, Eric led Elliott in to find Gloria and Matt busily writing their account of the afternoon’s activities. They both looked up when the two men entered. Gloria smiled and stood. Elliott wrapped his arms around her and held her tight.

  When he let her go again, Gloria stepped back and caught the look in Elliott’s eye. “What was that for?” she said.

  “Can’t a guy even hug his wife anymore without her questioning him about it?” Elliott said.

  Gloria looked over Elliott’s shoulder at Eric, who winked once and shook his head just once. She looked back at Elliott. “All right,” she said. “I’m glad to see you, too.” Elliott hugged her once more and then turned to his son. Matt held up both palms toward his father to ward off a similar hug. Elliott just grabbed his hand and shook it, patting his son on the back with his other hand. Once Matt had let his guard down, Elliott pulled him close and hugged his tightly, letting him go after a few seconds.

  “Seems like now would be the perfect time to ask for that raise,” Matt said, half-smiling.

  Matt and Gloria finished giving their statements and asked Eric if they could leave. He gently nodded at Gloria. “Go on home. If I have any more questions, I know where to find you.”

  “And what about Booth and that other guy?” Gloria said.

  As if on cue, the door at the far end of the hall opened and Gloria could see ambulance attendants wheeling two gurneys down the opposite hall, toward the morgue. Eric hiked a thumb over his shoulder. “Andy’ll take ‘em from here,” he said, referring to Andy Reynolds, the county medical examiner. “We’ll talk again tomorrow, but I think you ought to know that you and Matt may be in for a reward from the insurance company who insured that armored truck all those years ago. Most of it was still there in the house you and Matt followed them to.”

  “Really?” Gloria said, a smile playing on her face. Then, just as suddenly, she remembered having to shoot the second man and her face took on a solemn look. “We can talk about that tomorrow,” she added before taking Elliott’s arm and walking toward the parking lot with him and their son.

  Before they’d left the precinct building, Gloria felt the receiver in her pocket and retrieved it. The red light was blinking. “I guess I forgot to turn this off,” she said to Elliott.

  Elliott glanced at the screen and gestured down the hall. “Looks like it’s indicating the transmitter and it’s coming from that way. Come on, let’s see where it leads.”

  The three of them got to the end of the hall but instead of turning left toward the parking lot, Gloria turned right, toward the medical examiner’s office. She pushed the double swing doors open and walked in to the morgue. Andy Reynolds was just rolling a gurney with a body on it up to the autopsy table. Gloria approached the gurney, her receiver out in front of her. The red light on her readout was blinking so fast that it was almost a steady red now.

  “Heard you had a close one there, Gloria,” Andy said. “I’m glad to see you’re both all right.” He hesitated a moment and then looked at the gadget in Gloria’s hand. “What have you got there?”

  “It’s a kind of homing device,” she explained. “It’s tracking one of our transmitters.” Gloria held the receiver close to Booth’s collar and the device squealed with feedback. Andy stuck his fingers in his ears and scrunched up his face. “Sorry,” Gloria said and turned the receiver off before plucking the transmitter BB off Booth’s collar and pocketing it. “Well, twenty bucks is twenty bucks.”

  Andy rolled his eyes and turned his attentions back to the body on the gurney. Elliott led Gloria out of the morgue and out to their car. Matt followed close behind them, tugging up on his pants.

  “Didn’t you wear a belt today, Matt?” she said.

  “I forgot,” Matt explained. “I left the house without it and didn’t feel like going back for it. I managed to keep my pants up all day without it.”

  Elliott laughed. “You trying for the prize?” he said, and let the statement hang in the air.

  “The prize?” Matt said.

  “The no-belt prize,” Elliott said and picked up his pace before Matt could smack him in the shoulder. Maybe Matt’s book title sense of humor was beginning to rub off on him.

  128 - South Of The Boarder

  Elliott finished his toast, washed it down with some orange juice and dabbed at his lips with his napkin before rising from the breakfast table. He turned to his wife, Gloria, and gave her a quick kiss before heading for the front door.

  “What time do you think you’ll be home tonight, Elliott?” Gloria said, wiping her hands on her apron.

  “The usual time,” Elliott said, twisting the door knob and pulling it toward him. “Why, you cooking up something special for dinner tonight?”

  “No, that’s not it” Gloria said. “I just thought we could have a talk when you get home, that’s all. I guess I’ll see you tonight.”

  Elliott closed the door again and turned toward Gloria. “Oh oh,” he said, furrowing his brows. “That’s never a good thing to hear.”

  Gloria laid a hand on Elliott’s arm and smiled. “No, it’s nothing like that,” she assured him. “It can wait until tonight. You go on and have a good day at work.”

  Elliott took Gloria by the hand and led her into the living room and sat her down on the sofa. He sat next to her. “You know my curiosity would just gnaw at me all day long if we left it like this. Come on, tell me what’s on your
mind.”

  Gloria hesitated for a moment and then said, “Well, it seems lately that the business has been in a bit of a slump and our income is taking a hit.”

  Elliott settled into the comfortable folds of the sofa. “That’s just a temporary situation,” he said. “We always manage to bounce back, don’t we? So what is there to worry about this time?”

  Gloria shrugged. “You could be right,” she said. “But I was just wondering if maybe…”

  “You want to go out and find yourself a job?” Elliott said. “Is that all? Sure, go ahead. I don’t think there’s a big market for mature women in the workplace these days, but go ahead and take a look if you like.”

  “Clever choice of words, Mr. Cooper,” Gloria said. “But no, that’s not what I was thinking, either.”

  “Then what?” Elliott said, his curiosity piqued by now.

  “Well,” Gloria began, “With Matt and Olivia grown and gone now, we have two extra rooms and I was just thinking maybe we could rent one or both of those rooms out. You know, take in a boarder or two. I’m sure we could get at least a hundred dollars a week for each room. An extra four or eight hundred a month would be one heck of a cushion for us until things get better again.”

  Elliott thought for a moment. He wasn’t crazy about the idea of strangers living in his house, but on the other hand, that kind of extra income could help out in these tight times. “You think a single furnished room would bring a hundred dollars a week?” he said.

  “I’ve been checking the classified ads,” Gloria told him. “And the single furnished rooms are all going for anywhere between four twenty-five and a thousand dollars a month.”

  “So why settle for four hundred?” Elliott said. “You could always start higher and come down if you need to dicker a little. You can’t very well start out at four hundred and dicker your way up during the negotiations.”