Memories Are An Old Man's Toys

by Elayne Tulliani

  “I am leaving my apartment building on Bradstreet Avenue to Genie Brown; she has a young son named Joey and he has a form of autism. The rents from this building should provide you with not only an income, but it should help with some of the long-term medical needs for Joey.

  “I have set aside a small account to have the yard landscaped to accommodate a dog for Joey. There will be

  a secure fence and new sod installed. You are a very special mother, and Joey is lucky to have you.

  “Don’t be afraid to push him beyond what the doctor’s say he is capable of; you may be surprised. Thanks for a great day.

  “To my sister-in-law Lisa and her husband Jimmy Simpson, “I have made arrangements to pay off the balance of your condo mortgage. Furthermore, arrangements have been put in place to pay the remainder of the girl’s college education. You are special people, and I am blessed to have had you in my life.

  “The next person I would like to address is Gus Mahoney: I purchased a small single level house on the border of Revere and Saugus, it has a two-horse stall so you will always have a place to house Midnight Dream and perhaps rescue another horse, horses really should have a companion.

  “A trust has been established to provide for all of the medical needs of the horses as well as their upkeep. Thank you for your kindness through the years.”

  Attorney Wells paused for a moment and stated, “I was instructed that after reading the section about Mr. Gus Mahoney I was to hand these two envelopes to you Sherry and ask that you please read the one labeled Gus immediately following these proceeding and the second letter is to be read in private.” With that, she handed her the envelopes and Sherry placed them on her lap. The attorney resumed the reading.

  “Last but absolutely not least, to my beloved Sherry. I’m sure you remember when we were walking along the beach that afternoon, and we stopped in front of that quaint little house with the stonework and beautiful garden?”

  “He didn’t,” Sherry gasped.

  “The home has been purchased and is paid in full so all you have to do if you choose to, is move in and enjoy. That coupled with my pension, social security, life insurance, and the remainder of my estate should assure that you will live comfortably.

  “Sherry, I want you to enjoy life, I really do. That would make everything I’ve gone through worthwhile, just knowing that I left you in a better position.”

  One by one each person broke down in tears, but the tears were an odd mixture of relief, gratitude, disbelief, and grief. Gus was the only one that managed to maintain his composure, but Sherry saw the tears begin to well up

  in his eyes.

  As the attorney began to wrap up the details, she explained to each person what the next steps would be and added that the fact that Billy owned each of these properties outright would allow her to move quickly through the legalities. She assured each person that she would be in touch with each of them within the week. As everyone filed out with looks of complete disbelief etched across their faces, Sherry took the opportunity to read the note the attorney had handed her.

  It read: “Sherry, Let me tell you this about Gus, he’s a proud man, and he will balk at this with every bit of ornery old Irish blood he has in him. You pull him aside and privately tell him that I said ‘From one miserable old bastard to another, take the gift and shut your trap,’ trust me he will laugh.

  Also, tell him I have appreciated the friendship throughout the years and I wish him nothing but peace and tranquility.”

  Sherry stood back and waited for Gus to pass. When he reached the door, Sherry reached out and put her hand on his shoulder while asking, “May I speak with you for just a moment?”

  Gus was never one to refuse a pretty lady, and he offered his condolences to her, “Before you go any further let me say I’m sorry for your loss. Billy was a private man, and he didn’t share details but based on the last time I saw him I knew there was a little extra pep in his step, and I figured it must be somebody special, so thank you for being there for him.”

  “Thank you, thank you for saying that Gus, Billy wanted to make sure that I told you something.

  I quote: “From one miserable old bastard to another, take the gift and shut your trap,” and he also wanted me to tell you, “He appreciated your friendship through the years, and he wishes you peace and tranquility.”

  Gus immediately broke into laugher merged with tears, “That old son of a bitch, God rest his soul.” Sherry told him that Billy wanted him to know that Midnight Dream would always have a home. Gus lowered his head and while walking away said, “Thank you dear, you have just made an old man’s heart very happy, I’m just sorry we had to lose such a good guy.”

  As Sherry stepped out onto the staircase, she could see that everyone else was still standing around out front. She took a deep breath before walking down to the sidewalk to join the group. She knew that the lives of each of these people would forever be changed due to the generosity of Billy.

  Lisa and her family immediately approached her, “Sherry why would he do this for us? This is unbelievable.”

  Sherry said, “I know, but that’s the kind of man he was.” Sherry was emotionally drained and simply couldn’t face each person individually, so she asked for everyone attention for a minute, “Excuse me, I just wanted to say something to everyone. Each one of you managed to touch Billy’s heart in a special way, and for that, I want to thank you.

  I’m exhausted right now, and I don’t want anyone to feel as though I am dismissing your understandable questions but if it’s okay with all of you I promise I will give you each a call within the next day or two.”

  Everyone graciously understood and they exchanged quick goodbyes with Sherry. Amanda and Genie walked off together talking about how kind Billy was and how his generosity would impact their lives and the lives of their children.

  Sherry was anxious to get home and read the letter

  that Attorney Wells had given to her.

  Everyone that Billy chose to share his good fortune with had touched his life in a way that made an impact on him. They took the time to share a piece of their lives with him. Each one offered a glimpse into their personal lives, struggles, and dreams. They allowed themselves to be vulnerable. In short, they recognized him, they treated him with respect, and they made him feel as though his presence was of value. That was all he ever wanted, just to be valued.

  19

  A SEASON OF CHANGE

  As time rolled on Sherry moved into the lovely home that Billy had purchased for her. She spent her days mesmerized by the snow-covered shores. Winter turned to spring then spring to summer and with each passing day reality settled deeper into her soul. As the summer weather took hold of the region, she studied the visitors as they began to return to the beach. Ordinarily, she just sat out front and watched all the comings and goings of the children and sun worshipers.

  One morning as she sat on her front steps she looked over to the ocean, and rather than focusing on the masses she began to focus on the individuals. The parents were in the sand building castles with their children. People were sitting in small groups talking and laughing. “I’ll be damned; the crazy old bastard was on to something.” Only eight months into it and she could feel a shift.

  Of course, there were plenty of people scurrying around in offices and conference rooms trying to identify the “virus,” but she was confident that the two years would be up before they would detect anything. She knew it wasn’t a virus; they were looking in all the wrong places. It was their software that was doing this. She also knew that someone, someday would take credit for “solving” the outage and she would be the only one that knew that the rebirth of social media was by design.

  On this day she decided she’d been sitting on the sidelines long enough, she got up and walked over to the beach. The warm sand felt so inviting, and as she passed people on the beach, she made it a point to smiled and said hello. When she arrived at the point where the shore met the
sand she reached up and removed the little band that was holding her hair up off of her shoulders. She lifted the hem of her sundress up just above her knees and twisted it into a little knot and secured it with her hair band. The water was startlingly cold for this time of year, but it felt so refreshing, and it made her feel alive, perhaps for the first time in months.

  She strolled along completely consumed by her thoughts. When she finally looked up, she was standing in front of the lifeguard chair that she and Billy had stopped to rest on during one of their evening strolls. She decided to turn around and head back towards the house. During the walk back she tried to get out of her head and soak in the beauty that surrounded her; after all, that’s what Billy would have wanted for her, that’s all he ever really wanted for anyone.

  The water was a crystal blue with almost transparent white caps riding the tips of the gentle current. The sun beat warm on her face, and the sand shimmered with iridescent sparkles as the tide rolled in and then back out again. The scent of the ocean was faint but determined to make its presence know with each gentle breeze that drifted from the sea.

  The surroundings, however, were not what Sherry found to be the most beautiful things on the shore that day. As she walked along with almost magnetic movement, her eyes were drawn to the people. Her eyes darted from one group to the next. Families were digging in the sand and children were driving trucks through the valley’s left by the previous high tide. A group of young people were playing Frisbee, and another group of four kids were playing some game she didn’t recognize, but they looked like they were having fun.

  Couples were walking hand in hand; some appeared to be engaged in deep conversation. A whole group of young people who looked to be late teens, early twenties were roughhousing at the water’s edge. The boys were chasing the girls with the obvious threat of tossing them into the water. The girls were laughing and squealing like only girls of that age can get away with. A few people were reading books, and some sunbathers were just soaking in the rays and enjoying the moment.

  There were others who were looking at their phones and taking pictures, but none of them seemed to be immersed in the devices. An emotional yet beautiful smile consumed Sherry’s face, and she could feel the tears begin to well up in her eyes. Unlike other times when she would fight to hold them back, this time she chose to let them flow freely. She turned and walked a little deeper into the water, lifting her skirt up a little higher. Standing there as the cold salt water flirted with her upper thighs she stopped and looked out onto the horizon. She whispered into the ocean breeze, and her words drifted off and began to merge with the sound of the surf.

  “It worked honey; I hope you can see this from where ever you are. You have left this garden a more beautiful place then you found it, and you have left me a better person. Thank you, Billy, for everything and let me thank you for the people who will never know it was you that gave them this taste of living in the moment. Where they take it from here is in their own hands but you have given them a chance to see another way, and sometimes a chance is all people need. I love you honey for now and for always.”

  Sherry turned and completed her walk back towards her home. Her figure disappeared a little more with each step until she faded back into the crowd. Having been a woman who never fit in, the beauty of her blending into the crowd was a powerful sight.

  On that final word, Professor Simpson slowly placed the book on her lap. The students sat trying to wrap their heads around what they had just heard. For the first time since the crash, they were learning the truth behind the outage. It was not from a virus or a terrorist attack; it was in fact done intentionally to help them learn to appreciate life and to grasp the gift of living in the moment.

  Ms. Simpson granted them the time to process their thoughts. She broke the silence with a question. “Okay everyone, you are a generation that grew up consumed by social media and also had the privilege back in your teen years to taste life without it. Since social media returned to your lives, how do you feel you view it differently then you did back before the crash?”

  One young woman spoke up saying, “My parents always hated how much my brother and I were on our phones. We were always arguing at dinner because we weren’t allowed to bring our phones to the table. Shortly after the crash, the arguments stopped, and once we got used to its absence, it wasn’t so bad. “Now that you are making me think about it I guess we began to talk with each other,” the girl confessed.

  Another young woman spoke up, “I was never really into it as much as my friends were but I used to hate when we would go out to a movie or dinner, and my friends were constantly distracted by posting pictures of our dinner or responding to other peoples post. It always made me feel like they couldn’t have cared any less if I was there or not.”

  With that, a young man nodded and joined the discussion. “I hear ya; I remember going camping one time with about a dozen friends, we were camped at this great spot that was right alongside the river. It was dark, and we had a raging fire going, and everyone was sitting around the fire just chillin after a long day on the water. I went camping that weekend to get away from everything: school, parents, you know everything. I just needed some downtime to unwind and have some fun. I looked around at my friends, and every single one of them was staring at their phones, not the fire, not the sky, but their phones. It pissed me off so bad I just got up and went into my tent. If I wanted to stare at the back of peoples phones, I could have stayed home. The same group of friends went camping again years later during the outage, and it is one of my greatest memories, we had a kick-ass time on that trip.”

  A student that was sitting in the back piped up and said, “I loved social media, and I didn’t care who liked it. I was miserable when the crash happened; I felt like I lost my best friend. My parents kept telling me that I was acting like an addict. It took me about a year and a half before I started to adjust to it and I didn’t initially realize it, but I was starting to become more outgoing. I had never realized how dependent I had become; now I try to use it sparingly.”

  Professor Simpson shook her head in agreement and said, “So if I am to understand you all correctly you feel that after the initial adjustment you all eventually saw situations around you change in a positive direction. So is it fair to say that out of what first appeared to be a devastating loss emerged a gift of sorts?” She was met with a response of heads nodding yes and a few of the students verbalized, “Absolutely,” “For sure.”

  Ms. Simpson smiled and said, “Then it looks like old Billy kind of gave us a gift that we didn’t even realize we needed. I think that’s all he hoped to accomplish. He simply wanted us all to take the needed time to realize that although great power lay at our fingertips, we should never allow it to consume us to the point that we fail to see the beauty in life itself.

  “He learned to appreciated life and all it had to offer. I think that’s why right up until the very end he and Sherry continued to soak in every ounce of life offered to them. Even when he was nearing the end, before he was hospitalized, Sherry always made sure they never missed a sunset. She would help him to the car and place a blanket over his shoulders, and they would drive down to the beach and watch the sunset every night.”

  One of the students chimed in with a tone of challenge in his voice. “How can you assume that Ms. Simpson, it never mentioned anything at all about them driving to the beach to watch the sunset?”

  The instructor smiled, “Because I am Eloise and Sherry is my aunt, and if I’ve learned anything from Billy it’s that one person can make a difference.”

  The group of student fell deafeningly silent, and Eloise grasped that opportunity to move forward.

  “In closing allow me to please share with you a letter that Billy left behind with the hopes of better explaining what he thought his project would bring into people’s lives.”

  The same young man who challenged her a moment ago interrupted her again. “Wait a minute; Billy was very
careful not to share this information with anyone right? So Sherry was the only one that knew that he was responsible for the outage and he swore her to secrecy to protect her right? So how could you write this book and tell everyone;

  isn’t that placing your aunt in danger?”

  Eloise could see the concern on the faces of her students. She laid the book down for a moment and in a somber voice announced, “My Aunt Sherry passed away five years ago at sixty-five years old, after suffering from early onset Alzheimer’s. In her personal belongings was the letter that Attorney Wells had given to her during the reading of Billy’s estate which instructed her to make the letter public when she felt the time was right. She also left a detailed account of everything Billy had told her, and she did so with the hopes that I would share this information and open up a dialog about how easily we allow our lives to be manipulated and consumed by technology. In the final years of her life her notes and thoughts became confusing and difficult to follow, but before that, her notes were meticulous. Oddly enough her thoughts pertaining to the outage were extremely insightful and coherent. Towards the end, she would just sit for hours repeating, “Wait for the rippling effects” over and over and it wasn’t until she passed and I had the opportunity to study her notes that I began to understand what those words meant. You can all lay your concerns to rest; no-one is alive that would be in danger by this information being made public. Now let me share with you Billy’s letter:

  To whoever takes the time to read this letter,

  “While I realize the two years without social media may have been a drastic adjustment for some of you, my prayer is that in the end, you will recognize the value in my gift. You see the gift I bestowed upon you at the time of my death was not the trinkets I chose to leave behind to a select few. My true gift was what I chose to take with me. I took the technology that causes so many mothers and fathers to miss those precious moments in their children’s lives. I took the services that tempted and taunted so many and drove wedges between otherwise happy and loving relationships. I took away your ability to sit at the kitchen table and completely ignore your loved ones. I took with me the flood of condescending and judgmental opinions from strangers that sadly shape our young people’s opinions of themselves. I took away the horrific images that used to flood your social media accounts and in turn lull your minds and hearts into a false belief that the world is an ugly place.