THEN LIKE THE BLIND MAN: Orbie's Story

by Freddie Owens Wegela

  “He’s like a bucket got a hole in its bottom,” Granny said. “More you put in, more goes out.”

  “We all got holes,” Momma said.

  “Don’t it bother you none him takin’ that feller Armstrong’s side against Jessie?”

  “‘Course it does. He was just mad though. At all that business with the Union.” She looked away over the yard over the crossroads toward the cemetery. “Jessie’s gone, Mamaw. Won’t nothing bring him back.”

  The other day me, Missy, Granny and Momma had all gone over to the cemetery. Momma had stood over Daddy’s grave, arms wrapped about her body, shivering in the hot sun.

  “I need Victor,” Momma said. “Even with all he’s done, I still think of him.”

  “That little patch between your legs is talking now,” Granny said. “That’s old pussy talk!”

  I couldn’t keep from laughing out loud.

  Momma sent mad eyes to me, then back to Granny. “You sorrier than Granpaw is, I swear.”

  “I wasn’t born yesterday, daughter.”

  “What about forgiveness Mamaw? Ain’t they no room for forgiveness?”

  “Well, cut my ears off and feed ’em to the hogs!” Granny almost hollered. “Victor ain’t been around to ask for no forgiveness, and here you are a giving it away already. I wouldn’t be so quick to forgive a sorry son of a bitch! Excuse my French, Orbie.”

  “Revelations!” Granpaw hollered from his wheelchair.

  22

  A Wall Against Victor

  Willis and me were lying out on an old blanket by the well. It rained a few little sprinkles after supper, and we had spread the blanket over some grass sacks to keep it dry. I was reading my comic books. Willis sat, drawing a picture of Granny in her rocking chair. She was up on the front porch, fixing holes in Granpaw’s socks.

  A car grumbled down Bounty from Circle Stump followed by another. When it got to Granny and Granpaw’s, it pulled up in the yard and backed out again, turning so its nose pointed back the way it had come, back toward Circle Stump. It was Reverend Pennycall’s white police car, the gold ‘SHERIFF’ star on the side speckled with orange mud.

  The other car was a flashy blue Cadillac, shiny new with long smooth tail fins, double chrome headlights and whitewall tires. It waited for Reverend Pennycall’s police car to turn around, then pulled in the yard along side Momma’s Ford. The driver turned the motor off and got out. He walked around the front of the car, put his hands in his pockets and smiled at the yard.

  He wore sunglasses and a red sport coat over a pink shirt, a skinny white tie down the middle. He looked like a movie star, like Dean Martin maybe or Matt Dillon on Gun Smoke but without the hat. The way his hair was combed was more like Dean Martin’s, long and black and waved up over the top of his head.

  He walked closer and smiled a movie star smile at Willis and me. Then he looked the well up and down and smiled at it, like he was thinking it might look good someplace else, that he might could buy it with his movie star money and take it off to be wherever that was. He ran the palm of one of his hands, his left hand, along the side of his head like to smooth the hair flatter there. On the back of the hand I saw the heart shaped tattoo.

  “Victor!” I whispered to Willis but Willis had already stopped drawing on his picture and was staring at the man. I could feel my own heart doing somersaults inside my chest. I wanted to get up, but my legs wouldn’t go. “That’s him,” I said. “Victor.”

  Victor stepped toward the Jesus Tree. He looked the picture of Jesus up and down. I could see Granny, watching him from the porch. If he saw her, he never let on. He reached inside his coat to bring out a gold cigarette case. I could see a bunch of cigarettes with gold filters, all in a line. He tapped the case to get one out, shut it with a little click and slipped it back inside his coat. He put the cigarette between his teeth, looking at the Jesus Tree while he did. The way he cocked his head, the way he smiled at the Jesus Tree was like with the well, like he was figuring where a better place for the Jesus Tree might be and how much money it would cost to move it there.

  I found my legs and got up. “That tree ain’t for sale!”

  The unlit cigarette was planted in the middle of Victor’s movie star smile. He scissored it between his fingers and took it away. “Isn’t. Isn’t for sale, is what you mean, son.” He smiled at Willis then and nodded. Willis pulled himself up on his walking stick. Victor came a step or two closer and stopped. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it? You look good boy! Kentucky’s toughened you.” He nodded toward my feet. “You’ve got calluses.” I looked down at the hard half-moon slices that’d grown around my big toes. Victor gestured toward Willis. “Who’s your little friend?”

  “Willis,” I said. “His name’s Willis.”

  Willis tried to smile but it wouldn’t go.

  Victor had always dressed nice, but today he flashed out like a page in a magazine. You wouldn’t think he was from Detroit at all, but some other place fine and rich and pink. Someplace with palm trees maybe, with blue skies and sandy beaches. The buttons on his red coat matched the gold of his watch. Sharp creases sliced down the front of his creamy white slacks. A pair of shiny brown alligator shoes waited like real alligators, all smiley-mouthed and staring against the dirt. He gave the bill of my ball cap a friendly tap. “Never thought I’d see that thing again,” he said, his voice all-smooth-sounding like a radio announcer’s. “Pegasus. The winged horse.”

  He took off his sunglasses, nothing nasty in his eyes now, no worms cutting themselves and getting mean. He dropped the sunglasses in the slit of his pocket, his voice smooth as cream. “I’ve behaved badly son. Not just about the hat but about a lot of things. I hope you’ll forgive me. I hope you can.”

  I thought of the little boy in the cave; how confused I’d been, seeing his name written at the top of that page.

  “Ah. But that was then, wasn’t it?” Victor said. “Back then all I could think of was Florida and The Pink Flamingo. Got so caught up I forgot the reason for my going down in the first place.” He looked at me as though I could fill in the blank for his reason.

  So you could steel my Momma away, you sneaky-ass son of a bitch!

  “To be with you and Missy and your Momma,” Victor said. “As a family, Orbie. That’s all that matters.” He stood to the side so I could see the shape of his big new Cadillac. It looked like a boat or maybe a whale or a blue shiny rocket ship on white rubber wheels. Beside it Momma’s Ford looked pitiful as some old tractor engine rusting in a field.

  “It’s a wonderful place, Florida,” Victor smiled.

  “I’m not going to Florida,” I said.

  Victor shook his head to say ‘no’ but in slow motion. “I understand how you feel. Really I do. We all need time. We all need to take time. To consider things, I mean.” He put the cigarette back in his mouth, more like Dean Martin now than Clark Kent. He had that glow still – the thing that flashed out at you like a friend. “We’ve got plenty of time. We can take it slow. Can’t we son?”

  Only thing I wanted to take was a swipe at his head. Out the corner of my eye I could see Willis wall-eyeing him with a stone face. It was the first time I’d seen anybody meet Victor and not smile. Victor turned and walked back down to Reverend Pennycall and his police car.

  “Orbie!” Granny called from her place on the porch. “You boys! Come away from there!”

  Right then, Momma came out on the porch with Missy. “Mind what Granny says.”

  “We got all our stuff out here,” I said.

  “Leave it!” Momma said.

  Willis and me went up and sat on the edge of the porch.

  “It’s Victor, Momma. He’s back.”

  “I know. Be still.”

  “I want you just to look,” Granny said.

  Victor stood out by the police car, talking to Reverend Pennycall. Reverend Pennycall pushed up his straw hat and smiled at Victor, a pink smile in the middle of a pink face. He passed a fruit jar out the window to V
ictor. Victor held it to his mouth a second and passed it back.

  “I never seen the like,” Granny said. “In broad daylight now.”

  Momma said nothing. Missy sucked her thumb.

  Victor said something to Reverend Pennycall and they both laughed. Then Reverend Pennycall put the police car in gear and drove away. Victor stood, looking back at the house, figuring what it would take to buy and move someplace else.

  Granpaw and Miss Alma came around the corner. Miss Alma had a hold of Granpaw’s arm. “I’m all right. Shit,” Granpaw said but then he caught sight of Victor. “Sumbitch.”

  Miss Alma smiled. “Dat the purdiest white man I ever see.”

  “He’s purdy all right,” Granpaw said.

  Victor came up in the yard and stopped next to the Jesus Tree. The ground was still wet from the rain. The toes of his alligator shoes were splattered with mud. “I got turned around,” he said in a loud voice. “Sheriff was good enough to show me the way.”

  He smiled his movie star smile and spread his arms out wide. He stood like that a second, like he was waiting for us all to come down and give him a big hug, welcome him back. “Here I am! Your one and only!”

  Momma sat still.

  Granny reached down and picked out another sock from her sock basket.

  Miss Alma shook her head, smiling, and went back around the house.

  “One and only what?” Granpaw said.

  “Quiet, Strode,” Granny said.

  “What’s the matter with him?” Victor said.

  Nobody answered.

  “Well?” Victor said.

  “Well what?” Momma set Missy down. “Go on inside, honey.” Missy ran over to the screen door, opened it and went inside. She stood behind the screen and stared out at Victor.

  Victor looked at Willis and me. “What do you make of all this, you boys?”

  “Leave them out of it,” Momma said. “You got something to say, you say it to me.”

  “Oh come on, Ruby, baby. You’re not still mad, are you?”

  Momma looked daggers at Victor. The side of her face still faintly yellowed. The gash around her eye, a curved scar.

  Granpaw hawked up a gob and spit it on the ground.

  Victor looked at Granny. Then at Granpaw. Then at Granny again. A worry came in his eyes. Then he looked at Momma. “Of course you’re still mad. I know that. You’re probably thinking I’ve got some nerve. Coming here like this, I mean.”

  Momma stayed quiet.

  Victor wagged his head side to side, shaking it to say ‘no’ but in slow motion, like before. “I’d be upset too. I mean, if I were you.” Victor looked at Momma straight on. “What I did to you was terrible. I know that, Ruby. I lost my head.”

  “You lost more than that.” Momma got up from her chair, stepped to the edge of the porch and crossed her arms. “Look at you, dressed up slick as a car salesman. Expecting me to take you back ‘cause you sorry. It don’t work around that easy Victor!”

  “I know,” Victor said. “I know it doesn’t.”

  Momma looked out toward the blue Cadillac. “I reckon Armstrong give you that. Like he did the house.”

  “It’s just a loaner, baby. Temporary, you know.”

  “You look different. Your hair’s different. You’re not wearing your glasses.”

  “Armstrong thought I looked better without them.”

  “Armstrong did?”

  “Yeah.” Victor put the cigarette between his teeth and smiled. “He thinks I look more professional this way.”

  “Professional wife beater,” Granpaw said.

  Victor went on like he didn’t hear. “He’s sort of taken me under his wing. Armstrong has. He wants me to be happy. He wants you to be happy.”

  “He can kiss my hillbilly ass!” Momma said.

  Willis covered his mouth.

  Granny looked up. “Lord, Ruby!”

  “That’s how I feel, Mamaw. That’s the sorriest bunch you’d ever want to see, and I don’t want my kids around it!”

  “They won’t have to be,” Victor said. “Armstrong knows. I mean he understands how you feel.”

  “I ain’t married to Armstrong!”

  “I know. I explained it to him though, and he understands.

  That’s what I’m trying to tell you. Armstrong will stay out of the picture from now on, as far as our family life is concerned.” Victor turned toward Granny then. “You don’t know me from Adam, Mrs. Wood, but I’m not a bad man. I can change. I’ve always been able to change.”

  “I never heard such a load of bullshit in all my life!” Granpaw growled.

  Granny gave Victor a nod, green eyes flashing from a face of red leather. “It ain’t up to me to tell you, you can come back, and it ain’t up to me to tell you, you can’t. Ruby’s a mind of her own.” She looked at Momma, then back at Victor. “I tell you what’s the truth though, if you was a husband of mine and done what you done? Why, I’d tell you to hit the road Mister! I wouldn’t even have to think about it!”

  “It’s a long way back to St. Petersburg!” Momma said.

  Both her and Granny stared at Victor, Momma leaning against the post with her arms crossed, Granny sitting straight up in her rocking chair, her hand stretched out, touching Granpaw’s arm. They were like a wall against Victor.

  I looked at Willis and grinned.

  “All right, okay. If that’s how you all feel about it.” Victor put the cigarette back in his mouth. He took out a silver lighter, lit the cigarette and sucked till the end of it glowed. He forced two streams of white smoke from his nostrils. “Think about what I said though. No trouble this time, Ruby. None.”

  It wasn’t two days Cecil the mailman brought Momma chocolates from Victor. Then it was roses, red roses. Then a card with a note said how much he loved her. How much he cared about Missy and me. That he wanted us all to be happy together, in a nice house on the beach in Florida. It made me want to throw up. It made me want to use cuss words and spit.

  After that we started to see the blue Cadillac around. One day it was parked at Old Man Harlan’s store next to Reverend Pennycall’s police car. Another day it was at the cemetery gate – then up the road from Granny and Granpaw’s – just the Cadillac, no Victor. It was kind of spooky.

  Momma got mad about it. “Who does he think he is? And what business does he have at Nealy Harlan’s anyhow?”

  “I reckon even Victor got to buy things,” Granny said.

  “He don’t need to be coming all the way out here!” Momma nearly yelled. She turned to me then, a sharp wrinkle knifing up between her eyes. “You see that car anywhere about, you stay away!”

  Two days later the Cadillac was parked up the road again, a little ways up from Granny and Granpaw’s. This time Victor was with it, leaning against the front-end in his shirtsleeves. He had his sunglasses on, smoking a cigarette. He saw me standing in the yard and waved. When I looked later, he was gone.

  Momma let Victor see her again – finally. Two or three times she did. Mostly they argued about Florida, about Armstrong and his men, about Daddy or Fords or the investigation that was still going on. Every now and then, they would forget to argue though. Victor would get all gooey-eyed, and Momma all soft and smiley. I worried the wall was starting to crumble, but then Granny would butt in with some of her two cents and put an end to it. “Ya’ll remember where you at now, you two!” she might holler. “We don’t need none of that kissy stuff! Not around here we don’t. That slobberin’ around on each other spreads germs!” Such would fluster Momma and make Victor’s face turn red. It was all I could do not to laugh.

  One other time, again in the living room, Granpaw came out of his spell long enough to tell Victor what he thought of a man that would beat up a woman and take advantage of a little girl. Victor told him to mind his own business. Said Nealy Harlan owned his property and from what he understood, him and Granpaw weren’t on good speaking terms. He warned Granpaw he might lose what little he had if he didn’t watch hi
s mouth.

  We all waited for Granpaw to say something back but he had gone all zombie-eyed again. Stood next to the picture of the Lord’s Supper with his arms down to his sides, staring at Victor like he was a wall.

  “Get out, Victor!” Momma yelled. “Leave us be!”

  “I was just trying to straighten him out a little,” Victor said.

  “I’ll straighten you out is what I’ll do, straight out that door!” Momma grabbed up a stove poker and threw it at him.

  Victor knocked over a table getting out of the way. “It takes two to do the goddamn tango, Ruby!” He got in his Cadillac and like a mad man gunned it, thundering dust all over the road.

  I crawled to a place, not under the kitchen, but to another place I guessed was just under the living room floor.

  Willis crawled in after me. “Dey spider web and all kina ole shit unda here. Wha-What you gone do boy?”

  “Shh,” I whispered. “They can hear you.”

  We sat with our heads almost touching the underside of the plank floor. There were some tobacco sticks in a pile, two cans of rusty nails and a posthole digger. I sat on the handles of the posthole digger. Willis sat on the sticks.

  “Can’t see nothin’,” Willis said.

  “It’ll get to where you can.” The gap between the house and the ground let in the daylight. Still, it was so dim I could hardly see Willis’s face. “I wish Granny was here.” Granny and Miss Alma had taken Granpaw and Missy to Circle Stump to see the doctor. Not two minutes had gone by before Victor pulled up in his Cadillac. He walked right by me and Willis, not saying a word, went in the house and started up a talk with Momma. That’s when I got scared and crawled under the house to listen.

  Little streams of dirt sifted down from the planks. We could hear Victor talking on the other side, his radio announcer’s voice all calm and smooth. “I understand how you feel baby. I do. If I’d known they were going to behave like that, I’d have said something beforehand. I would have said, this is my wife, gentleman. My pride and joy.” Momma said nothing. “I should have said something later on too. I know I should have. I was nervous, Ruby. You know how I get.”