Transitions (A Thousand Words Book 1)

by Brooks, Tori

  “She’ll be a few,” Jack said. “I don’t think she was this anxious on your first date.” He glanced up the open staircase and shook his head with a light chuckle.

  “Should I be concerned?” Dev asked, amused by Jack’s reaction.

  Jack looked back at Dev and gave him a curt nod. Just great. Dev didn’t know what had Lindsay all anxious and late, but he at least appreciated Jack’s warning. Not that he could do much with it at this point. Maybe he should have brought chocolate too.

  Movement at the top of the stairs caught Dev’s attention, and he glanced up briefly to see Becky standing there in a pink dress, then looked again. Becky was taller and curvier than . . . Dev heard Jack retreat to his den as he fought to make sense of what he saw.

  It was Lindsay, but just barely. Nothing was the same. The heavy makeup was gone, instead she looked radiant. Her long black hair was cut short and angelically golden. Normally Dev couldn’t discern her figure clearly through the layers of shapeless clothes, but the pink dress hugged her petite curves.

  Dev watched as Lindsay descended the stairs, taking in every move she made. He watched as her hips swayed gently, and the fabric alternately stretched and wrinkled at her waist. Lindsay walked up to him, stared up into his face and smiled brightly, her pink lipstick shimmering.

  “Are those for me?”

  “What?” Dev asked, his voice barely more than a whisper.

  Lindsay smiled again. “I decided I was done mourning my lost childhood. It was time for a new look anyway. What do you think?”

  Dev nodded silently then considered she might like an answer. “You look good. Nice. It’s . . . I like the . . . your . . . hair.” Dev felt warmth creep up his neck into his face. He tore his eyes away from Lindsay’s, and noticed the roses in his hand. Dev felt stiff as he held them out for Lindsay, realizing she asked about them already. Even with Jack’s warning he was blowing this.

  “Thank you,” Lindsay said, taking the roses and burying her face in the barely-opened blossoms.

  Dev watched, mesmerized, and froze when she looked at him through her lashes. He had no idea what to do when Lindsay lifted her face from the flowers, keeping her blue eyes on his. Blue eyes. Not a dark blue, but not a watery, washed-out color either. Dev tried to place the exact color of Lindsay’s eyes but couldn’t. His brain seemed to be operating in a fog. He couldn’t believe he didn’t notice her eyes before. They sparkled with light and mischief. Perfect.

  Lindsay set the roses on the sideboard table, breaking the connection between them. Dev took a moment to compose himself.

  “Um.” Dev cleared his throat, embarrassed at his inarticulate reaction. “Shall we go then?”

  “Sure.” Lindsay faced him, her glistening lips pulling up at the corners and parting to show Dev just a glimpse of petite white teeth.

  Dev might have been lost all over again, but Lindsay readjusted the thin strap to a small silver purse Dev hadn’t noticed before. She took his arm and led him gently toward the door.

  Once in motion, Dev simply resolved not to look at Lindsay until he figured things out, it’d be easier. He got her settled in the passenger seat and slid into the car beside her. Instead of looking at Lindsay to tell her where they were going, he looked out the window over her shoulder. To his relief she didn’t comment, although Dev was sure she noticed.

  Driving didn’t require the concentration Dev wanted it to, and his mind was a hurricane of thoughts and emotions. His girlfriend was actually a girl, a pretty one at that. Strike that, Lindsay was beautiful. Dev always held suspicions Lindsay might be cute if she tried, but never considered the actual end result. He wanted her to ditch the costume, but never thought past the desire to realize what would happen when she did.

  Fine, Dev steeled himself to accept this turn of events. So he didn’t think it through, shame on him. It didn’t matter, this was good. He was never embarrassed with Lindsay on his arm. But now no one would look at her oddly when they recognized him, it was what people expected to see. Maybe Kenny and Jess would shut up about it. Doubtful, he decided.

  Anyway, so Lindsay was a girl. He knew that already, she just looked like one now. Dev chanced a sideways glance at the girl in the seat beside him. She was looking away, watching Seattle come into view as he drove downtown. Her short hair was so light and fine, it reminded Dev of a sculpture of fiber optic wires, alive with light and each strand perfectly placed. Dev wanted to reach out and touch it, but returned his eyes to the road and gripped the steering wheel firmly.

  He wondered why she cut her hair, it used to be down to her waist. The thought of that silky, golden hair cascading to Lindsay’s waist made Dev clench his teeth and steal another glance at her.

  Lindsay was still looking away and her bare shoulder drew his eye. The thin strap of her dress seemed only a suggestion as it laid limp across her shoulder. Its sole purpose was to provide contrast for the pale, translucent perfection of her skin. Smooth and – what was the word poets used? Dev’s eyes snapped to the road again as he considered Lindsay’s smooth, creamy skin. Alabaster, that was it. He was going to write some poetry later that Kenny would flip over.

  “Penny for your thoughts,” Lindsay said. It was somehow comforting to hear the familiar prompt from her when he was quiet and introspective too long.

  “They’re not worth that much,” Dev responded automatically. She was still his Lindsay, he decided. He just needed to think of it in superficial terms, like she changed her avatar online. This was really just a small change. Just clothes, hair, and makeup.

  He glanced over at her with a smile. Why did such a small change make such a big difference then? Lindsay smiled back and pointed to the road. Dev realized he’d stared at her for far too long and returned his focus to driving. What if, instead of just looking like a girl, Lindsay was going to start acting like a girl?

  Pulling off the freeway and starting to negotiate the streets of downtown Seattle, Dev considered the implications of Lindsay acting like a girl. He wasn’t exactly sure what that meant. The girls he knew superficially annoyed him; and the girls he knew well confused him. Actually, he knew George and Krista pretty well from their study group sessions, and they annoyed him too. He grew up with Cassie and her best friend, Tiffany, so it was clear he knew them too, and they also usually annoyed him. Where did that leave Lindsay?

  Dev didn’t want complications in his relationship with her. What they had was damn near perfect in his mind. Sure, maybe he would give the idea of kissing a go if she wore less lipstick, but otherwise, it was great. Why did she have to go and mess it up?

  The urge to slam on the breaks and scream at her filled Dev as he realized it was even more complicated with Lindsay. She was a nymphomaniac and she’d been ‘dry’ a long time, a year maybe. Who knew what was going through her mind? He felt like a mouse trapped in a cage with a hungry cat.

  “Dev? You need to breathe,” Lindsay said, an edge of concern in her voice. “Red light ahead.”

  Dev glanced ahead and slowed down. He nodded, taking a deep breath.

  “Do you want me to drive? I got my license you know.”

  “I also know you borrowed Sabrina’s car and smashed the back fender trying to parallel park. Then you borrowed Becky’s car and tried to drive it through a concrete fence.”

  “I didn’t try to drive it through the fence, it just happened. And I don’t remember telling you that.”

  “Becky did. I knew her first, remember?”

  “Oh, yes, I remember. I also remember having to go to my hacker big sister for advice on how to handle my hacker boyfriend, then being jealous that she knows part of you better than I do.” Lindsay sounded irritated and Dev risked looking at her. Her arms were folded over her chest and she held her gaze straight ahead, clearly annoyed with him.

  A car honking behind him prompted Dev to check the light and saw it was green. He drove on, wondering what to do with Lindsay’s outburst. She was jealous of her sister because he and Becky had a loose
working relationship? They were both members of The Web Wizards hacking circle. Their interaction was online using pseudonyms. It didn’t really make sense to Dev, but memories of Jess’s frequent rants about the irrationality of women came to mind and he let it slide. To Lindsay it made sense, and that was all he needed to worry about; that and what to do about it.

  “Lin, I . . .,” Dev faltered. “I don’t know what to do. Becky’s just Becky. Or maybe I should say she’s Terese. I mean it’s all online.”

  Dev pulled up to the restaurant. The valet opened Lindsay’s door for her and she glanced at Dev before getting out. Dev exited the car, trading the valet a ticket for a tip. He reached Lindsay, took her hand, and prayed she’d drop the subject. Lindsay smiled as Dev spoke to the hostess and they were led off to a quiet table. Once they were seated, Dev’s reprieve ended.

  Lindsay left her menu on the table and leaned forward, holding Dev’s eyes with her own. He had no idea what she was going to say, but he was pretty sure he wasn’t going to like it.

  “Dev, we talked before you left about my situation, and danced around it several times over the past few months,” Lindsay began. Dev almost swore. He knew he wasn’t going to like it.

  “Lin, let’s not discuss that particular topic here,” he pleaded.

  “No, not even in with all the interesting metaphors and code words we came up with to make it easier for you. What I’m getting at is a different situation that we danced around and avoided talking about with any real depth.”

  Dev’s brow drew together as he tried to figure out what she might be referring to. She smiled at his apparent confusion and reached across the table to take his hand in hers. Dev flinched as her fingers interlaced with his, her nails were longer and smoother than he remembered, and pink. He watched them as they delicately stroked the back of his hand.

  “Two things, Dev. First: you’re shy around girls, we both know that. I’ve always been the exception, and that doesn’t need to change. I’m the same girl I was when you left, although I get it that you might need some time to come to the same conclusion.”

  Dev nodded. “And second?” He pulled his hand away from hers and looked away, not willing to meet her eyes. The restaurant clientele proved almost as disturbing. As Dev watched, several people hastily looked away, a few put away their cell phones. Great, he completely forgot he was always on camera. Dev quickly adopted the mask-like expression he learned to loathe and returned his attention to his table. The silverware was neatly aligned and whoever folded the napkins was good at their job.

  “Remember when Jess said I was leading you like a horse to water?” Lindsay asked.

  “You agreed. This is what you meant?” Dev straightened the salt and pepper shakers so they lined up with the bowl of sugar substitutes.

  “It’s a step.” Lindsay shrugged. “You’re better around girls, although it’s been giving me panic attacks all semester because you’ve been around college girls 2,500 miles away.”

  “You know I don’t care about them,” Dev said with a sigh. He didn’t want to go over this again. The sugar substitutes were mixed up and he began alphabetizing them, finding one actual sugar packet in there as a sort of surprise bonus.

  Lindsay smiled and took the bowl of sugar packets away from Dev. She set it aside and kept his hands prisoner with her own to hold his attention. “I still like to hear you say it. And I like the way you looked at me at the house. You avoided girls at college because I cried and begged you to. Now you’re heading off on tour and they’ll be backstage and at pre-show events. You can’t avoid them. If Alec doesn’t kill you, Kenny will.”

  “Your point?” Dev asked, pulling a hand away and waiving off the waiter who was heading their direction.

  “Look at me, Dev.” Lindsay waited until Dev reluctantly turned to fully face her again. She was beyond pretty, Dev decided. More than beautiful. He would be tempted to call her angelic except he knew Lindsay too well to consider her anything close to an angel. The thought embarrassed him and he turned his attention to his water glass instead, watching beads of water condense on the side of the icy crystal.

  “Dev,” Lindsay whispered. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, but I want you to understand that those other women have nothing I don’t have.”

  “Of course not, Lin,” Dev said. He heard how short he sounded and took a breath to bring his temper in check. Dev looked back to her, lost in those crystal blue eyes. Lindsay smiled gently, almost imperceptibly, and reached across the table. She gently stroked Dev’s cheek, and he watched her hand as she reached for him, managing not to flinch. Her touch evoked something in him he didn’t recognize and wasn’t prepared for. Dev wanted to tell her to stop, he didn’t need complications like this, but somehow couldn’t.

  “Pink’s my favorite color, so you’ll be seeing a lot of it,” Lindsay said. She let her hand trail down past Dev’s chin and fall back to the table. “Maybe I should have worn purple tonight. A reminder that I know you and I support you, all of you, just as you are.”

  The reference to his online identity as Pugmire the Purple made Dev smile. He nodded. “Pink’s okay. Maybe I should shake things up and change my avatar color.”

  Lindsay laughed. “Oh, I bet that would go over well. Everyone would think you’re a girl. Of course Terese is alone right now.”

  “She’s just the only one who admits to it.” Dev shook his head.

  Lindsay perked up, Dev’s eyebrows pulled together in confusion.

  “So Bec – I mean Terese isn’t the only girl?”

  Dev hesitated then shook his head. “Rhys the Red is a girl.”

  “You can’t be serious.”

  Dev grinned. “Trust me, she is. I was seriously disturbed when I found out. I always pictured Rhys as a big hairy warrior-type.”

  Lindsay frowned. “I’ve only seen a few posts actually. I look over your shoulder sometimes and . . . someone else’s. I don’t get to see much of your chat. Mostly I just see the unofficial information. Does Terese know?”

  “I never mentioned it, so I doubt it.”

  “I’m not sure I like it that you do.”

  Dev analyzed Lindsay’s small frown and pursed brow, wishing he could read her as easily as she so often read his mood and even, it seemed, his mind.

  “Tell me about it,” Lindsay ordered. Dev didn’t judge if she had the right to make that demand. She was his girlfriend, he’d humor her as much as he could. He felt briefly unsettled at the reminder that Lindsay was his girlfriend. Dev pushed his unease aside, it wasn’t like it was really . . .

  Filing away his disturbing thoughts, Dev carefully told Lindsay about spring break and discovering George’s affiliation with The Web Wizards. He left her name out of it, of course, and that she flirted with him almost constantly. Lindsay didn’t need to know names, and it wasn’t his place to blow someone else’s cover.

  “So she’s the one who’s been hitting on you,” Lindsay said, sitting back and folding her arms.

  “What? I didn’t say that.” Dev mentally retraced his steps, wondering where he’d left the breadcrumbs Lindsay followed to that conclusion. The waiter appeared in his peripheral vision again and Dev reached for the lifeline.

  “The waiter’s coming back. Quick, decide what you want.” He picked up the menu and started looking it over. Lindsay didn’t move, and he pointed to her menu as a hint.

  “I’m having the butternut squash ravioli with portobello mushrooms. We’ve been here before, remember?”

  Dev felt his face turn pink and concentrated on the menu. He was so distracted by Lindsay’s new look, the uncomfortable conversation, and now the pressure of the waiter standing over them that he couldn’t think. Closing the menu and setting it aside, Dev caught Lindsay’s eye.

  “Fine, what do I want?”

  She grinned mischievously. “To eat I assume?”

  He nodded, confident his face was a darker pink than her dress by far.

  Lindsay turned to the waiter
and ordered for him, but Dev wasn’t paying attention. The line of Lindsay’s cheek stood pink against her creamy flesh, drawing Dev’s eye. The way she moved, the light brush of her hair against her face, the way her ear peeked out from beneath the pale strands. Lindsay’s earrings caught Dev’s attention: simple pearl studs and they bothered him for some reason. Maybe he’d buy her earrings. Jess talked about giving women jewelry, but Dev couldn’t remember the rules Jess followed at the moment. Of course it didn’t –

  “Dev?” Lindsay called his name to get his attention, shaking his thoughts loose. He smiled and shook his head. “Thoughts?” she asked.

  “Jess and his ideas about dating.”

  “They don’t apply to us, you know that. Now that you brought it up though . . .”

  Dev smiled and tried to be positive as Lindsay questioned how Jess and Kenny were likely to take her new look. He couldn’t figure out how she managed to spring it on him like this and asked her about it directly. Lindsay blushed a fascinatingly feminine shade of pink when she admitted she wore a black wig for their weekly webcam dates. One thing he always appreciated about Lindsay was her dedication. She never did anything halfway.

  Somehow Dev made it through dinner. Even though Lindsay knew everything he did the last few months and vice versa, they recapped the high points before moving on to the latest news in computing. By the time he slid behind the wheel of his car, Dev was more comfortable with the new Lindsay Antoinette Caffey.

  It was early yet and Dev drove out to a rocky beach on Puget Sound. He parked and told Lindsay what he knew so far about the upcoming tour. She listened attentively, but as Dev went on, he realized Lindsay wasn’t happy to hear about the musical achievement that would soon tear them apart again.

  “So I have to listen to these CDs,” Dev finished weakly. He gestured to three CDs he had wedged between the seats. Lindsay picked them up, chose one, and slid it into the CD player. She forwarded to the fourth track and turned up the volume as Dev heard the first strained notes of a guitar.

  “Rushing On,” Lindsay said. “You could get a worse band to open for.”