The Guardian Trilogy: The Complete Collection - Guardian, Allegiant & Reborn

by Sara Mack

  Suddenly, a brilliant flash of lightning illuminates the patio and thunder rips through the sky. It sounds like it’s directly over the house, and I jump. The lights flicker, and we lose power. I stare across the table at Dane in the dark. “Crap.”

  He laughs. “I think there’s a flashlight under the sink.”

  We both get up and head toward the kitchen, using the sporadic flashes of light to guide the way. I make it around the dining table and to the counter. “We’re going to need more than a flashlight,” I say. “We can use those candles from around the bathtub.”

  “Got it,” he says and heads off toward the bedroom.

  I get to the sink and open the cupboard, but I can’t see a damn thing. I reach around blindly, knocking over the paper towel and, I think, a bottle of soap. I feel something cylindrical and grab it. When I pull it close to my eyes, I find that it’s a small fire extinguisher. I put it back and feel around some more. Ah ha! Bingo. Flashlight.

  I turn it on and the beam is dim, but it works. I start opening drawers to find matches or a lighter. There’s a grill on the patio, surely there’s a lighter here somewhere.

  With no luck in the drawers, I turn to the cupboards. Way back in the corner of one, I think I see what might be a box of matches. I set the flashlight down and heave myself on to the counter, kneeling, to reach it.

  I feel hands around my waist.

  “AH!” I fall to the side on my hip and whip around. “Don’t sneak up on me!”

  Dane laughs. “I don’t want you to fall.”

  “I won’t fall!”

  He leaves his hands around my waist. “Why are you up there?”

  “I’m looking for matches to light the candles. It’s going to be hard to play Clue in the dark.”

  “I know something else we can play in the dark.”

  What?

  He turns me by my waist and pulls me forward, causing my legs to fall off the counter and land on either side of him. It feels like he might pick me up, so I brace myself against his shoulders. He doesn’t lift me though; he just pulls me as close to him as possible. As I sit on the counter facing him, he closes the short distance between us in seconds, finding my mouth. This isn’t like the kiss we shared the first morning we were here; this kiss is reminiscent of last summer when things got out of hand. Instinctively I lean back, but he follows me and there’s really nowhere to go. His hands leave my waist, traveling over my hips and down my thighs to rest on my knees. He pulls them both to his body and holds them there, pinning himself between my legs. My heart races and my insides start to knot.

  His mouth leaves mine, tracing a hot trail along my jaw. My mind flashes to his earlier scenario. “I’m not Scarlet,” I protest.

  His lips leave my skin. “And I’m not a Colonel.” His mouth finds mine again and as I kiss him back, I’m one person divided: half of me shouts, “This is wrong!” while the other half screams, “This is so right!”

  His hands leave my knees and move up to my hips again. He grasps them as he pulls his mouth away for a moment and rests his forehead against mine.

  “Then what game is this?” I whisper.

  His lips move back to my neck. “Naked Twister.”

  Chapter 26

  “Wow!” I lean to the side. “Just come out and say it, why don’t you?”

  He moves his face in front of mine. “Subtlety wasn’t working.”

  My eyebrows shoot up. “You’ve been subtle? I got every message you’ve sent.”

  I can see him frown in the darkness. “Then what’s taking us so long?”

  “So long? We’ve been here two weeks!”

  He takes a step back from me. “Are you serious? We’ve known each other for months.”

  “Yes, but…”

  “But what?”

  I hesitate. How do I explain feelings that I don’t understand?

  “Emma,” he says. “What’s holding you back? You have to talk to me.”

  A low rumble of thunder passes overhead, and I wrap my arms around my waist. “I don’t know where to start.”

  He steps forward and sets his hands on either side of me, against the countertop. He leans close and looks directly into my eyes. “Now is the time to be honest. Can you do that?”

  He knows everything now; I would never lie to him. “Of course.”

  “Do you have feelings for me?”

  I can’t deny that I do. I have since last summer. I hold his gaze and nod.

  “And what do you think will happen if you give in to those feelings?”

  I lower my eyes. “A lot.”

  “Name one thing.”

  I give him a defeated look. If he can see it in the darkness, I can’t tell. “I’ve only ever been with James…this is really new for me.”

  “So you’re nervous?” he guesses.

  I shrug.

  He gives me a crooked smile. “Well, you’re not alone. I’ve been with Teagan since I was sixteen; I think this is something we can work on together.”

  I roll my eyes. “That makes it worse.”

  “Why?”

  “Have you seen her?” I ask incredulously. “She’s gorgeous. Like straight out of a magazine super model material.” I unfold my arms just as lightning lights up the sky and look down at myself. “This is not that.”

  He stands up straight and takes my wrists in his hands. “There’s no comparison.”

  My heart flips when he says this, but I still give him a dry look. “Come on.”

  “You think you’re worried about competing with Teags?” he says and lets me go. “I have James to live up to. You’ve put him on a pedestal, and he’s tied to you for life. Competing with a Guardian isn’t easy.”

  My expression twists. Dane has never come across as anything but confident; I took it for granted that he truly was. “I’ve never compared the two of you, I swear. You’re different people.”

  He places his hands on my knees. “Then you see my point.”

  I stare at him, mute, accepting his logic. The only sound is the rain that continues to pound against the house.

  “It appears we stand on even ground when it comes to the exes,” he says. “What else are you worried about?”

  “James isn’t an ex,” I say automatically.

  He gives me a confused look. “But you can’t be together. Or did I misunderstand something about the whole assignment thing?”

  “No; you’re right.” I shake my head. “It’s just that we’ll never be apart. He’ll know you and I are together; I’ll feel like I’m cheating on him.”

  He frowns. “And he’s not cheating on you with this Meg? Or how about that other girl, the one from the bonfire? What was that?”

  I stare at him speechless. I can’t believe he brought that up.

  He sighs. “I’m not trying to make you feel bad. It’s just…from the outside, it appears someone has a wandering eye.”

  Stubbornly, I cross my arms. “I trust James. He said nothing was going on with Meg.”

  “But, you’re still suspicious. Yes?”

  I give him an exasperated look, and he leans in close. “In my experience, where there’s smoke there’s fire. That’s all I’m saying.”

  I scowl. “It sounds like you’re trying to make him look bad for your own benefit.”

  He pauses, shaking his head. “Believe that if you want. What I’m trying to do is ease your conscience.”

  Memories flood my mind. I think about what happened with Rebecca, James’ consolation of her, and their kiss. I think about how much their interaction meant to her. I recall his defense of Meg, when he didn’t deny she might have feelings for him. I remember the way he looked when he found out she could still become human, and again, when he learned she’d been Touched. My shoulders sag. “You might be right,” I concede quietly.

  Dane reaches for my hands, and I unfold my arms. Our silence allows me to listen to the wind; it’s let up and the rain doesn’t fall as hard against the house. He squeezes my fingers.
“I never want you to feel guilty about us. Everything that has happened, and anything else that does, will never be meaningless.”

  “I would never think it was.” My heart knows that what happens between us will only make us stronger, and that’s a little scary. Am I ready to take that step?

  He leans forward and places a gentle kiss on my lips, then pulls on my hands. “I don’t think the power will be on any time soon. Let’s finish this conversation in a more comfortable place.”

  I ease myself off the counter and set my feet on the floor. He releases one of my hands and leads me to the bedroom where he lets go and moves around his side of the bed to change. I do the same. It takes me a minute to find my pajamas in the dark, but once I do, I feel my way to the bathroom to put them on and brush my teeth. When I’m finished, Dane trades places with me.

  I crawl onto my side of the bed and try to get comfortable, hugging a pillow to my chest. I think about what we’ve discussed and feel some weight lifted from my shoulders. It’s comforting to know he’s not as confident as I assumed; this is all new for him, too. He knows about my guilt surrounding James, and I don’t have to make up excuses as to why I feel conflicted. As for the idea of James cheating on me, well, that’s going to take a minute to process. But, what Dane says is true. As much as it hurts, James and I can’t be together, and he’s going to move on. His duty leaves him no choice. Would it be so horrible if I did the same?

  The bed moves when Dane gets under the covers, and, a moment later, I feel him directly behind me. He speaks over my shoulder. “I’d prefer if you’d hug me instead of the pillow.”

  Honestly, I’d prefer that too. I glance behind me as he slides his arms around my waist, pulls me back against his chest, and moves us both to the center of the bed. I reach up and arrange the pillow under my head, as he gets settled, then tuck myself into him as closely as possible.

  “I take it this is okay?” he asks.

  I nod against him and weave my fingers through his.

  He rests his chin in the crook of my neck. “Is there anything else you want to talk about?”

  “I don’t think so. I feel better.”

  “I’m glad. I’m sorry I brought up the cheating thing.”

  I shrug. “The truth hurts sometimes. It’s not like you haven’t been there to know.”

  He holds me tighter.

  The warm feeling of him surrounding me makes me sleepy. I close my eyes and give in to the comfort of his presence.

  “Can I ask you a question?”

  I turn my face toward him as much as I can. “Sure.”

  “It’s a big one.”

  Yikes. I shift my body to lie next to him on my back, so I can see his face. “That worries me.”

  He props himself on his elbow and looks down. “If you can’t give me an answer, I’ll understand. Just be honest with me, okay?”

  Now I’m really concerned. “Okay,” I say, uncertain.

  He takes a deep breath. “What else can I do to prove that I’m in love with you?”

  My heart stops. Did he just say…?

  He leans over me. “Name it. I’m serious.”

  I swallow and meet his eyes. Even in the dark I can see how much feeling is there, how much he means what he says. What did I ever do to deserve him? Absolutely nothing.

  He gives me an anxious smile. “So? I’m waiting.”

  I push myself up on my elbows and hold my face inches from his. “You’ve already given me so much. There’s nothing else I need.” Once that statement is out of my mouth, I realize that there is something that he needs. I can at least give him that, right? After everything he’s done for me?

  He reaches up and runs his fingers from my temple to my chin. “Are you sure?”

  I know what he’s asking. Too many emotions race through my heart. When I decide to give myself to him, I want it to be the only thing on my mind. “Patience,” I say. I know it’s a lot to ask.

  “Done.” He wraps his arms around me again and pulls me against him. We lay down as we were before.

  “I’m sorry I’m being difficult.”

  “What’s new?”

  I can hear the smile in his voice, and I elbow his side. He laughs and then sighs. He squeezes me again and plants a kiss by my ear. “I could get used to this.”

  “What?”

  “Holding you like this.”

  I smile. “Well, get used to it.” If I can’t give him everything right now, I can at least give him some things. “I’m feeling mighty comfortable right here. It may be the only way I can sleep from now on.”

  “You promise?” he asks.

  I nod.

  He gives me another innocent kiss, where he gave me the first, then I feel his head hit the pillow. “Good night,” he says.

  I push myself back against him, eliminating any space between us. “’Night.”

  As I float on my back in the pool, I think about the last few days and smile; so far, it’s been the best time I’ve had here. Our discussion the night of the storm ushered the elephant out of the room. Now, Dane and I are more relaxed around each other.

  Okay, I take that back.

  He’s the same he’s always been except he now knows I’m not going to freak out if he touches me. I’m the one who feels liberated. If he makes a suggestive comment, I smile. If he wraps his arms around me I lean into him, instead of away. If he kisses me, I don’t think twice about kissing him back. To say that it’s nice would be an understatement. Who knew things could be this easy? The twinges of guilt that still pop up from time to time are nothing near what I used to feel. Don’t get me wrong; I’m completely dreading the moment when I have to explain myself to James. But, he has to feel that I am happy and that should count for something. I hope.

  I turn over and swim to the stairs, sufficiently chlorinated for ten in the morning. Stepping out of the pool, I make my way over to my towel and dry off. As I wrap it around myself, a pair of arms circles me from behind.

  “Morning swim?” Dane asks over my shoulder.

  “Yep,” I smile. Under his arms I pull the towel tight around me. “You’re back early.”

  “I got a brilliant idea,” he says and turns me around. “Tomorrow is Thanksgiving.”

  “Yeah, I know.” I will miss my mother’s cooking and the smell of pumpkin pie.

  “Do you want to do the whole traditional turkey and stuffing thing?”

  My nose scrunches. “I don’t think eating a turkey prepared by me is such a good idea.”

  He smiles and his eyes light up. “I thought you might say something like that.” He kisses me softly then releases me, turning toward the house. “I’m going to get cleaned up then I have some plans to make. I shouldn’t be long.”

  “Where are you going?”

  He grins. “None of your business.”

  I eye him suspiciously. “Just tell me.”

  He opens the sliding door and sets one foot inside. “Let’s just say what I’m planning for tomorrow will keep your mind off of home.”

  I don’t know why, but an image of bungee jumping immediately springs to mind. “Don’t plan anything crazy,” I warn him. I don’t want him to be disappointed if he gets me all the way to wherever and I refuse to cooperate.

  “Don’t worry,” he smiles. “I’ll be back in a few.”

  I watch him shut the door and disappear. I look up at the blue sky and decide sunbathing is in order. It’s technically Thanksgiving break, right? I head over to the lounge and spread my towel on the chair, then lie on my stomach to tan. As the sun warms me, I relax. I should only lie here a few minutes; I need to get dressed and start my day. For what reason, I don’t know. My class work is beyond caught up and I’ve made the requisite emails for the week. I should call my parents tomorrow, though, for the holiday. I think about what I would be doing if I were at home and frown. I definitely wouldn’t be doing this; it’s probably freezing and snowy. My frown turns upside down. This is better.

  Unfortunat
ely, hours later, I’m feeling the polar opposite of better. At noon, I started to get antsy. At two, antsy turned into worried. At three, worried morphed into anger. And now, at five, the anger has subsided into something worse. Panic.

  Dane hasn’t come back.

  I hang up my cell in frustration as I get his voicemail for the third time. I would call more but I don’t want to come across as needy, even though I’m about ready to hyperventilate. He’s never left me alone this long before. As I pace the floor, I try to stop my mind from weaving a tapestry of unpleasant scenarios. He must be hurt if he’s not answering his phone. What if he got into an accident? The hospital wouldn’t know to contact me.

  And then another equally unpleasant thought enters my psyche. What if we’ve been found? I knew things were too good to be true. What if The Allegiant have taken Dane and are planning on using him against me? It’s not out of the question. What if James slipped up because of my happiness and got caught? The thought of losing either of them to The Allegiant twists my heart. And if the reason isn’t supernatural, I don’t think my soul could bear losing Dane the way I lost James. I imagine him on the side of the road, bleeding, and my body starts to shake. I can’t lose him. I can’t.

  I sit on the couch, clutching my phone, and wrap my arms around my waist. I need to hold my insides together. I don’t know what to do. We never discussed this; we don’t have a plan if something happens to one of us. I know this isn’t the inner city, but we should have known things couldn’t be left to chance. The fact that we’re in the situation we’re in should’ve given us a clue. I stare at the floor as the tears that dance behind my eyes take center stage. How long do I wait before I head on foot to search for him?

  Mercifully, minutes later, the door to the garage opens. I whip around and stand as Dane finally makes an appearance. He sees my expression and his face immediately softens.

  “I’m so sorry,” he says.

  I stare at him for a moment to make sure he’s really there. I wipe my face then walk around the couch. He holds out his phone.

  “My battery died,” he glares at the phone, “and I lost track of time.”