She had to cool down before she could even think about rational conversations. No dramatics. No hysterics. No melodrama. Just Vanderbilt Charles clearing her head. Getting some perspective. That’s right.
Of course, she also didn’t want to run into him before she got to the proper state of mind. She kicked her frilly stuff under the bed and grabbed her old backpack, dumping everything from her newer, ill-gotten purse into it, and gripped her cell phone as she made a silent sprint for the door.
She made it out and into the gray morning light, and closed the door carefully behind her without being noticed. Breathing in the fog, she broke into a jog. It wasn’t quite a full-out run, but she put some distance between them before she slowed and checked for her signal. Nothing. Typical.
Keeping the same pace, she continued down the road, eyes fixed on the cell phone, silently begging for a signal. She just wanted to call Ursa and get picked up.
When Travis had offered to get her a car, she’d been so delighted because Ursa was ordering her fancy new Bentley. It had been exciting to go car shopping with Travis, and she hadn’t thought twice about trading in the car he’d proclaimed a death trap for a gorgeous BMW Alpina B6 in metallic green.
There was no way in hell she would take the ill-gotten car or any of the other things he’d purchased for her.
She was not fucking desperate!
She bit into her lower lip to keep from crying.
That’s probably why she didn’t see the car that slammed into her.
Chapter 4
Night
Vans wanted the afterlife to be filled with pretty sunsets, where a dozen handsome men would feed her peeled grapes or sushi. Probably better with sushi.
Instead, she felt only pain.
Perhaps Vanderbilt Charles was too naughty for the harem of sexy men she’d dreamt about.
She felt like a bug pinged off a windshield. The crunch of the car slamming into her came back in a rush. She’d rolled some distance before her world melted into a red blur. It came back now. All the gory, aching details.
She tasted copper fire and dirt. It was blessedly dark, which was soothing against her aching head, but unfortunately, it was raining. The lights of distant Oakland and San Francisco gleamed with an indistinct shimmer through the haze. She lay shivering in the mud, curled up around the base of a tree, where she’d come to rest after her tumble. Or flight. The complete journey remained hazy.
Not at a hospital. So, the jerk who smooshed her didn’t stop. That was unfortunate.
Wiggling her toes and fingers, she was relieved they worked. With an effort, she pushed into a sitting position, testing out her limbs. The muscles screamed with electric agony, but she managed to push upright, keeping her back to the tree. When she rolled her tongue around in her mouth, she realized she’d bitten through her lip. The pain came with waves of nausea and a spinning sensation, warning her that unconsciousness was going to claim her.
“Don’t pass out, Charles,” she hissed as the world spun, swimming through her tears. Through the haze of pain, she couldn’t tell what pieces were broken, or if she’d just been torn really bad. She wasn’t going to be able to climb up the rain-slick embankment to reach the road. A sudden horrible grief swept over her.
Similar to the unexpected voice of the woman in the tapestry, the emotion wasn’t her own. She didn’t know how, but she felt the difference. Then she noticed the steady drumming sensation in the back of her head. Searching. A terror-filled, desperate searching. It washed over her like a cold wind, filling her with a wretched emptiness.
The seeker will stop his search, the tapestry woman had told her.
She felt so fucking helpless! It wasn’t the first time she needed to have her ass hauled up out of the mud. Absolutely ridiculous! How many hours had she been down this hill and no one had come for her?
Because no one knew where she was. She’d crept out without a word and had never gotten to call Ursa. Her phone was gone. The pack was lost, too. Her teeth chattered as she shivered, and she rested against the tree, her eyelids closing heavily.
I’m sorry we’ll never get to spend Christmas together, she thought grimly, focusing on the steady pulse in her head, and it beat stronger against her, anchored into her. For a moment, she felt a disorienting weightlessness, as though she were flying. She gripped handfuls of dirt on either side of her to make sure she had not started falling again.
The earth stayed firmly beneath her, while her head spun. She kept focused on the spot, and the spinning very quickly resolved into stillness. It felt rather nice.
Elation swelled through her. The passion of it, equal to the earlier grief, didn’t belong purely to her. It seemed familiar, though. Her head throbbed, the pain fracturing her focus.
A light flickered along the top of the cliff. Flashlights, or maybe car headlights—it was hard to tell.
“Here!” That was Travis’s voice. It sounded raspy, as though he’d worn it raw. Suddenly, he came bounding down the hillside like a damn deer.
She opened her mouth to cry out a warning, but only a shocked croak came out as the man in question came into view and she realized why he was so effortlessly flitting down the hill. The fucker had no shirt on in the drizzling cold, and huge, shadowy wings fanned open in the darkness.
Did you see it? Do you like it?
Fuck.
She felt such a raw swell of relief at seeing him that she couldn’t sort out her other emotions through the roaring in her ears. He knelt beside her and curled those shadowy wings around her. His expression looked horribly stricken, matching the touch of the searching sensation that pulled against her senses. His mouth moved, but he didn’t seem to be able to form words.
Reaching up, she cupped his cheek, smearing mud on his handsome face. “You are going to get sick and tired of pulling me out of the mud,” she teased.
He made a broken sound, and the wings curled in tighter around her. They felt delightfully warm and smelled like him—leather and cloves. She shyly ran her fingers along one of the wings, making him start at the touch. And there was that expression in the dark.
Did you see it? Do you like it?
She forced a smile and squeezed her fingers around the feathers as tightly as she could, her swollen knuckles aching.
“Love, I need to get you up top. I’m afraid to move you.” He tipped his head from one side to the other as if judging her wounds through clothing and skin. “Have you tried to move? Did you fall from the top?”
“Car hit me,” she explained. “Left me here.”
“Well?” Leo’s voice called from up top.
“She’s hurt,” Travis shouted back up. “Call 9-1-1.”
Turning back to her, he leaned in and lightly pressed his forehead to hers. His warm tears fell against her cheeks. “I’ll stay with you until they arrive. Please don’t leave me,” he whispered. One of his hands found hers while the other cupped her cheek, and he blotted out the rain and cold with his body sheltering her.
She was sure she told him she wouldn’t leave, but the warmth was so nice she drifted off. She definitely did not pass out.
Chapter 5
Hospital
Sometime later, she woke feeling remarkably better. Amazing what having a replenishment of blood and painkillers could do for a body. The room was empty, but there were several vases of flowers on the bedside table. She wondered how long she’d been out. Had she missed Christmas and New Year? None of her limbs were trapped in casts, and she could move them. Although she felt sore, it no longer tore at her with the same white-hot agony it had when she was crumpled on the muddy hillside.
The hillside.
Her thoughts turned to what had happened to her and what she’d seen.
Travis had wings.
Enormous, shadowy wings. How the fuck had she missed those? No wonder he looked at her with pregnant expectation all the time. A fierce delight spread through her as she replayed the memory in her mind. It seemed so surreal, but she h
ad felt them against her dirt-crusted fingers. Best of all, Marcie had never seen them. What upset Travis more? That Marcie had never seen his wings, or that Vans had not? Vans would be angry, too, if she had lovely wings and no one could see them, particularly her love.
She felt a soft touch inside her head, spreading warm light through her, just before the door opened and Travis came in. His stricken expression melted into one of joy as their eyes met. The sensation of the touch intensified the drumming pulse in her head. Found you. Got you. Safe.
He didn’t say anything as he came to her side and reached for her hand, simply bowed over her fingers and pressed his hot face against her skin. She held her breath, not sure what to say. Uncertainly, she used her free hand to stroke through his hair, her heart twisting up inside her. His fingers tightened around hers, his lips warm against her knuckles.
“You scared the shit out of me, precious. I almost lost you.”
“You don’t have to worry about me,” she said, surprised by the detachment in her voice.
He jerked his head back to regard her. His expression showed his shock. It was hard to meet the raw emotion on his face. “I get to worry about the woman I love,” he said firmly. “I’m sorry I didn’t find you sooner. I didn’t even know you’d left until—”
“How long after your phone call with Marcie did you even notice?”
He frowned as understanding dawned on him.
“I heard your conversation with her. I needed to think about how I felt, hearing you planning to break up with me. Are you thinking after New Year? Get the holidays out of the way?”
His eyes widened. “No, Vanderbilt. You misunderstand!”
“I didn’t hit my head hard enough to forget what you said.”
“Did you hear me tell her how much I love you? Hear how desperate I was for you to see me?”
“I heard you tell her you think I’m desperate,” she said. Steady. Focus. She thought of the redhead in the tapestry, all fire and steel. “I heard how angry you were that she didn’t see you. Travis, you told me all along to talk to you about anything bothering me, yet rather than talk to me about what is eating you, you talk to your ex-lover. I’ll live on the damn street before someone treats me like I’m disposable. Am I seeing clear enough now?”
“I misspoke in anger. I was wrong to say those things.”
She was unfamiliar with this vulnerable side of him. This was the just-out-of-the-shower Travis. Exposed to her and unprotected.
“I was duped by the company I have lived and bled for all these years, Vanderbilt. They lied to me. They used me.” He said it through his teeth as fire blazed in those fierce blue eyes. “I was overwhelmed after being deceived by people who have been closer than family to me. I would be crushed without you. I love you.”
It was amazing. She actually felt his emotions inside her. These were not empty words, but a heat sweeping through her. “How do you think I would feel? I love you, too, asshole. When are you expecting to break up with me?”
He bit back a strangled sound and moved to sit on the side of the bed, cupping her face and gazing down at her. “I am planning no such thing! I lashed out from a place of frustration and resentment. I had no idea how to start this conversation with you. ‘I’m not like other guys. There’s something I need to show you. Except you can’t see.’ How could I have this secret from you? From everyone else in the entire world, sure, but not the woman I love. And I love you desperately, Vanderbilt. Humbly. Brokenly.” He stroked his fingertips along her cheeks, tracing her features with featherlight touches. “You didn’t even pay attention to what I bid on for you. Imagine if I did that to you.”
She felt heat rush to her cheeks at being called out on her inattentiveness, and nuzzled into his fingers. “I’m sorry. I am working on my focus,” she whispered.
“I know, baby. I spoke in the heat of the moment. No one sees me, Vanderbilt. Not you, who I love, or any of my friends. I want to be seen by you. Only you. You, who trust me and somehow allow me to hurt you in the most exquisite ways while loving it the way I crave it. Without fear. You are fearless, Vanderbilt Charles, and I love you. Do not leave me.”
She’d never seen him humbled that way, and it disturbed her profoundly. He pressed his forehead to her knuckles, gripping her hand hard as though he were afraid if he let go she would vanish.
Like he held her in the night.
“Let me see then,” she said and blushed at the intensity of his azure eyes. There was the same electric fire within them despite the dark smudges beneath.
He didn’t even hesitate. Without even his usual dramatic flair, he pulled the sweater up and off his hard body. For a moment, they both held their breath. She didn’t see anything different, just his extraordinary body, which she desired so much. Her heart spiraled around in her chest, and then one glossy wing peeked out, followed more quickly by the other when she started to track the movement of the first one.
“Oh!”
In the darkness they had looked inky black, but they were actually a beautiful, bright pewter in the light. The edges of each feather were scalloped with lighter and darker gray, the primary feathers barred with dark slashes. When he turned his back to her, they looked darker, a gunmetal gray, and dappled with black arrows along the shoulders. “Wow,” she whispered. “You’re a…uh…seeker?”
She thought she heard the soft chuckle of the redhead for her understanding. Hearing her was going to take some getting used to.
At her whisper, he whirled to face her, swift and agile.
She pulled the sheets up her face and tried to hide as he swooped in on her. “Where did you hear that?” He sounded overjoyed by her unexpected revelation.
“This is crazy, but the woman in the tapestry told me,” she answered from behind the cloth, and he carefully pushed the linen down and leaned in to kiss her. Uncertainly, she returned the affection, her mouth sore where she’d bitten it during the accident.
“The woman in the tapestry?” He searched her face and kissed her again, tenderly and sweetly. “You are amazing. But don’t trust everything a woman in an old rug tells you.” Some of his humor had returned. She reached for one of his wings and pulled it to her face, nuzzling it.
It wasn’t until she ran her fingers through the feathers and breathed in the leathery, spiced scent of them that she fully grasped why it would be so important for her to see them. To touch them. To share that most intimate secret with him. “Did you ever wrap me in these?” she asked.
“Every single night, precious love.” He reluctantly drew back and pulled on his sweater.
They were both silent, watching each other as he stepped to her side and reached for her hand. She curled her fingers with his. “Can you forgive me? In my rage over being lied to for years, I managed to jeopardize the most important thing to me. You.”
“I’m kind of banged up now,” Vans said with a sigh, motioning to herself with her free hand. “What you see is what you get. I don’t know how bad I am yet. You might have to baby me the rest of my life.” She wiggled her toes and eyebrows.
“Believe me, I want your delicious package as is, pretty baby. We might have to put off your Christmas gift though.”
“You will? But didn’t you get that for me at the auction?”
He smiled a secret little smile and shrugged. “We’ll see,” he said cryptically.
“Well, I think I can forgive you despite that,” she murmured softly.
Chapter 6
Discharge
The doctor was happy to report that, aside from things twisted, pulled, strained and sprained, the most dangerous injuries were the mild concussion, the cuts, and where she had bitten through her lip. She was stitched up and would need to be watched, but Travis assured the doctor that she would not be left alone. She was discharged to the care of her lover, and found herself gingerly tucked into the luxurious Rolls Royce that was parked at the front doors. The same car, she suspected, he’d driven her to the Tahoe house in.
<
br /> “Before I spirit you off to New York, we have an invitation to attend a holiday party that will last until New Year’s Eve. How are you feeling about that?” he asked as he slid into the backseat beside her. Clearly, he’d hired someone else to attend to silly things such as driving.
“I don’t know how much fun I’ll be at a party. No dancing. No drinking. I’m not sure about the sex, either.”
His eyes twinkled and he opened his arms to her, coaxing her in close to him with a rumbling sigh of appreciation as she fit against his broad chest. “Can’t I even pleasure my lady?”
She shivered at the tone and cuddled tighter against him. “Maybe. Where is this mysterious party happening?”
“It’s Marcie’s place. Leo and Ursa are going to be there, too. Mostly, it will be soaking in the hot tub and eating good food. Relaxing.”
She thought about it, and then tipped her chin up carefully. “Will that Mano guy be there? Are you going to be weird?”
He lightly touched the stitches on her lip and leaned in to kiss beside the spot. “I don’t know if he will, but I won’t be weird. I promise.” His azure eyes gleamed in the darkness of the car, and he reached over to the console and pulled it open, revealing a small box wrapped in a bright red ribbon.
Vans opened her eyes and followed the motion as he shifted. “It’s not Christmas yet,” she whispered as he offered the box to her.
“This isn’t your Christmas gift, Vanderbilt. This is just for you.” He held her gaze.
Her heart pounded as she felt Travis’s excitement and anticipation. She pulled the ribbon off and let it fall away as he opened the box. Inside was a gleaming platinum ring with an enormous diamond set as though held by upraised wings. “Oh shit!”
“Vanderbilt Charles, you wonderful brat. Will you make me the luckiest bastard alive and agree to marry me?”
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