Lifelong Affair

by Carole Mortimer

  Morgan sat silently at Alex's side as they drove to the hospital to pick up Courtney, so nervous her palms felt damp. It was ridiculous to feel so nervous about seeing a baby for the first time, but she couldn't help it. Babies were something she had no experience of, especially ones as young as Courtney. She didn't even know how to hold him—something Rita Hammond had taken great pains to point out to her.

  Alex had obviously spoken to his mother by the time Morgan joined them for dinner the previous evening, for Rita Hammond was at her most haughty as she pointed out all the reasons Morgan wasn't equipped to take care of a baby. When Morgan had remained blandly adamant the older woman had resorted to insults. Even her son's curtly spoken words hadn't deterred her, until finally Alex suggested his mother retire to her room, where he accompanied her, returning only after his mother had fallen into a sedated sleep, apologising tersely for her rudeness, but making no excuses for it.

  Morgan had slept fitfully, her body completely out of English time, and rose early, only to find Alex was up before her, having already breakfasted and doing some work in his study. Morgan had only just managed to contain her anxiety to leave and collect Courtney, waiting impatiently until Alex suggested it was time to go.

  And now they were almost there. She was going to see Glenna's son at last!

  He was beautiful! There was no other way to describe the tiny peaches and cream bundle wrapped in the white blanket. Tears filled her eyes as the nurse wheeled him out to them in his tiny crib, sleeping peacefully after his mid-morning feed.

  'He's beautiful,' she breathed softly, her eyes wide with wonder 'Alex . . .! She looked at him glowingly.

  His expression softened. 'Why don't you dress him while I have a word with the doctor?'

  She swallowed hard. She thought herself a pretty gutsy lady, but this tiny baby terrified her. 'I'll try.' She moistened her lips nervously, taking the box of expensive baby clothes that were part of a delivery made to the house early this morning. It seemed that the Hammond money could even get those sort of things delivered.

  The nurse showed her into a private room, and between the two of them—with a lot of help from the nurse! —they managed to dress Courtney in the all-in-one btue suit. It still managed to swamp him despite being ey. He was so incredibly like Glenna, with fiery-red hair and deep blue eyes, that Morgan felt fresh tears well up in her eves.

  Go ahead and cry,' the nurse encouraged gently. 'It's always like this when a mother gets to take a premature baby home.'

  Morgan blinked up at the young girl. 'Oh, but '

  'He's so much like you,' the nurse cooed at him gently. 'And I think he has your husband's jaw even now. He's going to be a strong-minded little boy.'

  Morgan smiled at this young girl's misconception. Somehow the other girl had the impression that she and Alex were Courtney's parents. How angry he would be if he knew!

  'I've been on holiday for a couple of weeks,' the girl unwittingly explained her mistake, 'so I missed Courtney's arrival into the world, but I can see he's done »ery well for a premature baby.' She helped Morgan put on the little woollen cap over Courtney's red curls. 'He has your colouring, you know,' she smiled.

  "Probably a temper to go with it,' Morgan joined in the laughter, feeling a sense of elation at being in at die start of Courtney's life, seeing no reason to correct the young nurse's impression of her being his mother, not wanting the complications and sympathy such an explanation would evoke.

  'Here's your husband now.' The girl moved to the door, smiling shyly up at Alex as he stood in the doorway.

  Morgan looked at him, Courtney held firmly in her arms, wondering what his reaction was going to be to being thought her husband. The opinion he had of her morals, he would probably heatedly deny such a relationship.

  'Ready, darling?' he asked huskily.

  She nodded slowly, too stunned to answer him with words, and followed him out into the corridor.

  'Good luck!' the young nurse beamed at them.

  Alex gave her an abrupt nod, including a silver-haired woman in a blue uniform in that departing nod as they passed the office. 'Thank you—for everything,' he murmured softly to the woman.

  Morgan allowed Alex to help her into the back of the dark Mercedes, still holding Courtney firmly in her arms, looking down in awe at his sleeping face.

  She looked up at Alex as he settled her more comfortably. 'Why'

  'Wait until we're on our way,' he rasped softly, closing the door with a soft click so that he didn't disturb the baby nestling against her.

  Morgan had never experienced anything like the maternal love that flowed out of her for Courtney. It was a curiously choking feeling to know that he was totally dependent on her—on her and Alex. Alex had already made it clear that he intended taking a very strong part in Courtney's life, and she already knew him well enough to know he meant every word.

  He spoke suddenly, interrupting her thoughts. 'As yet the media aren't aware of Courtney's existence,' he told her abruptly. 'I intend keeping it that way for as long as possible. That's why the deception at the hospital.'

  'Deception?' she frowned.'Courtney was registered as our child.'

  "Ours?' she gasped.

  He nodded. 'That's right.'

  "You have a hell of a nerve '

  Ssh, you'll wake the baby,' he mocked her anger. 'And I'm sure you have no idea what to do if that happens.' He eyed her mockingly in the driving mirror. 'No comeback?'

  None,' she shrugged. 'But I bet you don't know either,' she said with satisfaction.

  'Wrong,' he returned smugly.

  Her eyes widened. 'Wrong?'

  He nodded. 'I have it all written down. Compliments of the Ward Sister.'

  "That's cheating!'

  'Common sense,' he corrected. 'I even have a bottle B case he wants feeding.'

  Too clever by half,' she mumbled, feeling too dated from holding Courtney in her arms to feel any peal anger with Alex. Holding the tiny baby gave her a •case of well-being, as if she held a tiny part of Glenna to her.

  Glenna would have loved Courtney, she had been looking forward to his birth so much. No wonder she had clung to life long enough to give birth to him. If only her strange decision to make Alex Hammond and herself Courtney's guardians could be explained that easily!

  Although Alex seemed more approachable today, lee inclined to be the austere stranger she was used to. Perhaps Courtney's innocence had got to him too. Although she wouldn't count on it! No doubt he would revert to type soon enough.

  'Damn, damn, damnV he muttered as they entered the long driveway to the house, and slowed the car down.

  'What is it?" Morgan sat forward concernedly, Courtney still—thank goodness!—fast asleep in her arms.

  'I hope you feel up to facing the press again,' he ground out. 'Why the hell didn't my mother ring the police and have them thrown off my land!' he bit out grimly as he halted the car and was instantly surrounded by obvious members of the press, tape-recorders and cameras at the ready. 'There's going to be no keeping Courtney's existence a secret now,' he turned to mutter. 'Just stay at my side, Morgan, and don't say a word!'

  What did he take her for! He treated her as if she was some sort of brainless idiot, not a woman of twenty-six. Who did----------

  'And calm down,' he taunted at the flash in her green eyes. 'You don't want them to think you hate me, do you?' he mocked before swinging out of the car to walk round and open the door for her, ignoring the questions being thrown at him as if he didn't hear them.

  'Is this your nephew, Mr Hammond?' The jostling became more intense as Morgan stepped out of the car with Courtney in her arms.

  'The son of Glenna McKay and your brother Mark?' they persisted as Alex guided her towards the house.

  'Is this Morgan McKay, sir?' another tried politeness.

  'Of course it is,' another man said eagerly. 'Don't you watch her in Power Trap? His tone implied appreciation of the character she played. 'It's been rumoured that you
and Miss McKay are the baby's guardians,' the man followed them as they walked up the steps to the house. T>o you have any comment to make about that, Mr Hammond?'

  Again Alex ignored the question, although Morgan could see by the tightening of his mouth that he was angry such information had become public knowledge.

  'Does this mean that, in the best tradition of romances, the two of you will be marrying?' the man persisted.

  Morgan knew she had blanched, and she could sec that Alex had stiffened at such a suggestion. She and Alex marry? Never!

  CHAPTER THREE

  HER arm felt bruised from the way Alex thrust her inside the house, closing the door in the young man's face as he continued his questioning.

  Morgan had never been so shocked in her life. Where did people get these ideas from? She and Alex hardly knew each other, and what they did know they disliked. They would certainly never consider marrying each other, not even for Courtney's sake.

  Alex was scowling heavily as his mother came out of the lounge, throwing his car keys down carelessly cm the hall table. 'Have you called the police, Mother?' he rasped.

  'Police?' Rita Hammond looked puzzled. 'Oh, you mean the press,' she dismissed.

  'Of course I mean-

  'Alex, you had no right to take that woman with you to collect my grandson!' Her icy blue eyes spat venom at Morgan.

  He frowned. 'Are you saying you told the media?' he asked softly.

  'No, of course not,' the elderly woman snapped, striding over to stand in front of Morgan. 'Give him to me,' she ordered, holding out her arms for the baby.

  Morgan's arms tightened about the tiny shawl-wrapped form. She didn't like the almost hysterical gleam in Rita Hammond's eyes. She had been wrong about this woman's lack of emotion concerning Glenna and Mark's death; Rita Hammond was slowly cracking up, her emotions held on too tight a rein.

  Morgan looked appealingly at Alex, and was relieved when he stepped forward to take control of the situation.

  'It's time for your medication, Mother

  "I don't want it,' his mother refused imperiously, shaking off his hand on her arm. 'It just makes me epy. If I hadn't been sleeping this morning I could have come with you to collect Courtney. She has no eight to him!'

  'Mother------- '

  'She's a slut, Alex, just like her sister was. I will not permit her into my grandson's life!' Rita Hammond's voice was beginning to rise shrilly. 'You should know mat no member of that family is capable of bringing up a child decently!' Her eyes glittered with hatred.

  Morgan was very pale, 'Mrs Hammond '

  'Give the baby to me!' The other woman reached out for Courtney, and Morgan stepped back out of her reach. There was no way she was going to relinquish the baby to this hysterical woman!

  'Mother-------- '

  'Give him to me!' Rita Hammond began pulling at her arms, waking the baby, who instantly gave a heartrending wail of hunger. 'You see?' she turned triumphantly to her son. 'Courtney doesn't like her either. He's frightened of her. Alex, I forbid this woman to come near my grandson.'

  'Let's go to your room, Mother,' Alex controlled her, firmly propelling her out of the room, not sparing second glance for the shocked and pale Morgan.

  What did Rita Hammond mean by calling Glenna a slut? How dared she talk about Glenna like that, and imply that she was the same! The woman might be bordering on collapse, but her insults to Glenna were unforgivable.

  'Shall I take the baby for his feed, Miss McKay?' She turned at the softly spoken words, her eyes widening as she took in the neat nurse's uniform and kindly face of the middle-aged woman standing in front of her, her arms held out for Courtney.

  'I believe he's hungry, Miss McKay,' the woman added pointedly as the baby continued to scream.

  Anger warred with practicality, and finally it was the latter that won. Courtney was hungry, extremely so by the sound of him, and as she had no idea what Alex had done with his bottle Morgan had no choice but to hand the baby over to the capable-looking woman.

  'Mr Hammond engaged you?' she asked casually as the woman held Courtney confidently in her arms.

  'Of course,' the woman nodded. 'I've prepared the nursery in your absence. If you'll excuse me .. .'

  Morgan nodded abrupdy; Courtney's lungs sounded as if he were going to burst if someone didn't feed him soon! But Alex's decision to engage a nurse for him without even consulting her was unforgivable, especially when she had already made her feelings about such an idea clear.

  He hadn't returned from his mother's room after ten minutes wait, and with an angry sigh Morgan went up to her room to shower and change for lunch. What she had to say to him couldn't wait much longer. Glenna might have been treated like an outcast in this family—Rita Hammond's words more than showed that!—but Morgan McKay wasn't tied by love to any member of this family, and she wouldn't let them walk all over her.

  She lunched alone, although the absence of the reporters in the driveway told her that Alex had been in touch with the police. A casual query to Symonds as to Alex's whereabouts now told her he was in his study. That was all she needed to know!

  Alex told her to come in after her firm knock on the door, and she stood aggressively in front of his desk, refusing his offer to sit down. She didn't intend wting at a disadvantage by sitting acrow Bee some naughty schoolgirl!

  "You engaged a nanny '

  •Nurse,' he corrected calmly. 'Courtney is with her mrwi' He raised dark brows enquiringly.

  She nodded abruptly. 'He's been fed, and is now ast asleep in his crib. I checked on him before lunch,' she explained,

  'I believe Mrs Ford is very capable,' he nodded.

  'And I believe I told you I didn't want Courtney to

  hive a nanny-- '

  'Mrs Ford is a nurse,' he repeated, sitting back, his eyes narrowed as if for battle.

  Nanny, nurse, it's.all the same!' she said heatedly.

  Cool grey eyes raked over her disdainfully. 'Courtney is a premature baby, he was bom in unusual circumstances. The doctors only agreed to him coming home with us today on the understanding that an experienced nurse be engaged to monitor his progress for a few weeks.'

  •Oh.'

  Indeed,' he drawled at her discomfort.

  Angry colour flared in her cheeks. 'You could have told me that, damn you! You didn't say a damned word on the drive to the hospital, or on the way back.'

  'I had other things on my mind—-'

  •Your hysterical mother for one, I hope,' she snapped. 'Let's leave my mother out of this,' he bit out harshly.

  'Let's not,' Morgan shot back at him tautly. ihe threw out some insults before lunch that need explaining.'

  Alex put down his pen, standing up restlessly. Why do you persist in pursuing subjects that would be better left for the moment?' he bit out, his eyes narrowing angrily.

  'And why do you persist in avoiding them?' she snapped, as tense as he was, and not just because of the things his mother had said about Glenna. She still hadn't got over the shock of the suggestion that she and this man should marry for Courtney's sake. It would have been laughable, if the reporter hadn't been so damned serious. 'So far you've opted out of discussing Courtney's furtures and now you won't tell me the reason for your mother's hatred of Glenna.'

  A nerve pulsed erratically in his hard cheek. 'Did it ever occur to you that I am as deeply affected at this doubled loss as you and my mother appear to be?' he rasped. 'Did you ever think I might have some grief of my own to contend with?' His mouth twisted as contrition washed over her. 'I can see you didn't, he said abruptly. 'And maybe I don't show my emotions as easily as you do, but that doesn't mean I don't have them. Mark was my young brother, and Glenna had been a member of my family for two years. Maybe I haven't been showing my feelings before now, but you and my mother have been displaying enough hysteria for all of us!' he scorned hardly.

  She swallowed hard, feeling the chastisement for what it was. Just because the man gave the impression of being o
f stone it didn't mean he was without feelings. 'I'm sorry,' she said stiltedly. 'We'll— postpone this discussion then.'

  His mouth twisted with dry humour. 'Only postpone it?'

  'Your mother's words against Glenna were pretty insulting.'

  'She's at breaking point, surely you can see that?' Alex dismissed.

  She nodded. 'But it's usually when we're under the most emotional strain that we can dare to say the things we really feel.'

  'My mother is always!—articulate, he drawledely. 'Believe me, she always says what she Tike you.'

  'And you,' he nodded.

  Unwilling humour lightened her features. 'Pretty Mot lot, aren't we?' she mocked. T would say so,' Alex agreed wryly. 'Now would you if I got on with my work? Hammond Industries, unfortunately, hasn't ground to a halt, I still have to He was kept very busy the next three days, so much ID that Morgan rarely saw him. She didn't see too . of Rita Hammond either, as Alex had persuaded the other woman to stay with her daughter for a while, absence was a welcome relief to Morgan. She it almost every waking moment with Courtney, soon lost her nervousness with him, managing to iced, dress and change him with ease now. And the baby seemed to be coming to know her too, often Mopping his crying if she should happen to take him in her arms and cradle him, when he wouldn't stop for Mrs Ford.

  Morgan came to a halt in the nursery doorway on the third evening when she saw Alex actually sitting in The rocker in the nursery feeding Courtney his evening bottle. As far as she was aware he had never done such a thing before.

  As if becoming aware of her gaze on him he looked up, giving a rueful grimace at her surprised expression.

  'You're doing very well,' she smiled, moving further into the room.

  'I thought I was,' he nodded. 'Until I winded him and he was sick down my back!'

  Morgan held back her laugh with difficulty. 'I had a few accidents like that to start with, but now I always put a towel over my shoulder.'