Cassie's Hope (Riders Up)

by Kraft, Adriana

  Clint grinned at Cassie sticking her fork into a tender piece of prime rib while still chattering about her purchases. Horses were so in her blood.

  “But I have to pinch myself now and then to think that I stayed in the bidding for the bay colt. Thank god, we stopped when we did. I don’t think I would have gone much more than another five thousand.”

  They sat in a candlelit curtained alcove at an upscale restaurant. Unlike at lunch, neither noise nor stares of other patrons threatened to intrude.

  “You did real fine,” Clint said, with a little hint of pride. “Once, though, I thought you were going to go over and clobber that guy in the loud green sport coat.”

  “Well, he looked at me with such disdain. Like I didn’t belong.” Cassie pouted. “I didn’t like him one bit.”

  “Some folks think they can intimidate anybody, especially a woman.”

  “Hah, a lot some folks know,” she retorted. “And that beautiful little filly. I still can’t believe I stole her for such a low price. Both of them looked fantastic. I expect to buy a couple broodmares tomorrow to go along with them. What about you? You’re not going to drive back to Utah with an empty trailer are you?”

  “No, while you were checking out your yearlings, I was dickering with the buyer of Hip Number 12. I offered him ten thousand more than the original purchase price and he took it.”

  “Hip Number 12,” Cassie muttered, brushing back wisps of hair from her ear. “That filly sold for a hundred thousand, easy.”

  He loved watching Cassie with her mouth open. Cute. It made her look cute. “You have a good memory.”

  “You bought a horse plus made reservations for this luxury setting? You’ve been a busy boy. What else have you been up to?”

  “It’s not uncommon at these auctions for a horse to change hands a couple times before it actually leaves the premises. A lot of folks are in this to make a quick profit. This guy made ten thousand, a ten percent profit, without lifting a finger, buying a bag of oats, or taking a risk. He’s happy and I’m happy. That’s what makes for good horse trading.”

  Clint sliced another tender piece of meat. Knowing they couldn’t avoid discussing the topic weighing on them like reinforced concrete any longer, he decided to go for broke. “We’ve got to talk about us, you know.”

  “I know,” she said weakly.

  He put his fork down on the tablecloth and sighed deeply. “I told you earlier about going to see my grandmother. She was very helpful.” He chuckled. “You might not be surprised to learn that she came by one day to tell me to come and see her once I realized I was totally lost.”

  Wiping a tear from the corner of her eye, Cassie nodded. “That’s not hard to fathom.”

  “Anyway, I’ve felt lower than a snake for some time about what I did to you. What I did to the kids. To all of us. Now, I’m aware I was battling fears of losing you and being rejected by you. In the end, I guess I thought I wouldn’t measure up. You were taking so long to decide. I panicked.”

  He paused to sip some water. “You see, I had to reject you before you walked out on me. It was so uncharacteristic of me to declare my love before knowing where you were. I was certain you were using suspicions of my involvement in drugging your horse as a way of rejecting me.”

  Cassie shook her head. Tears pooled in her eyes.

  “I now know I was dealing with stuff I’d learned from my father as a child.” Even to him, his words sounded hollow, divorced from feeling. “You see, I never quite measured up. I had learned that love was earned, meted out in small bits as a reward for good behavior….

  “Anyway, I had to at least see you and apologize for distrusting you, for hurting you. I’m so sorry, Cassidy. You were the best thing to happen to me in years, and I threw you over like it meant nothing.” Clint paused. His shoulders slumped. “I was wrong.”

  Cassie reached into her purse for a tissue. Gingerly, she reached across the table to wipe his tears away, then dabbed at her own. “I can’t tell you it didn’t hurt terribly. You wouldn’t listen. It was like I was a non-person. I made a pledge to myself that I would never forgive you.”

  She chuckled softly. “Yet, here I am. Oh, I was still raging at you when I left Chicago. But somewhere along the way—maybe flying over Utah—I rediscovered my heart, what is really important and what I really want. You are not the easiest person to love, Mr. Travers. But I seem to be up to the task.”

  His heart pounded into overdrive.

  “The irony is that I ran from you, too,” she added in a soft voice. “I ran from your declaration of love. I didn’t know if I could be a good mother. I knew loving you would be a terribly wrenching thing for my life. I wasn’t at all sure that I wanted to take the risk to really love. And when I decided…the day I decided to make that leap, to acknowledge and completely express that love, you showed up at my door in the middle of the night accusing me of betraying your trust and your honor.”

  For long moments Clint met Cassie’s gaze, unable to respond with words. The yellow flame of the tiny centerpiece candle flickered in the breeze of the air conditioner.

  Clint wet his lips and broke the silence. “I love you, Cassidy O’Hanlon. I always will.” He swallowed and waited.

  Cassie smiled radiantly and murmured, “And I love you. And always will.”

  “Then we ought to be able to figure out a way of building a future together. Don’t you agree?” he said, again holding his breath.

  “We ought to.” Cassie chewed on her trembling lower lip. “If we can commit to listen to each other. And when we think things are going awry, to stop and ask how we’re doing. Then we’ll have a viable future.”

  Cassie laughed out loud, her eyes snapping playfully. “Remember what your grandmother advised me…the message you gave me from her: Tell Fire Woman to trust only her heart. Not what she sees or hears. Only her heart.”

  He closed his eyes briefly. “Yeah, I remember.”

  “Well, it was a very long flight out here from Chicago.” Moving aside her plate, she placed her elbows on the table and spoke quietly. “When I left, I dreaded the possibility that I might bump into you here. I cussed you out in all the ways I could think of. By the time I landed, I was hoping you would be here. That we might have one more chance.”

  Clint could have watched her eyes sparkle and dance all night long. He had no doubt they’d have as many chances as it took.

  “Maybe I needed that time alone.” Cassie sighed, interlacing her fingers. “Anyway, I tried to take your grandmother’s advice and listen to my heart. Maybe I needed a lot of quiet, solitary time before I could hear what my heart was speaking. For in my heart, I know we belong together. Somehow, we have to work it out.”

  “We’ll work it out,” he responded confidently, reaching for her hand. “We have to.”

  “Would you two like some dessert?” asked the waiter, pulling back the alcove curtain.

  Cassie replied quickly, “Why not? I’ll have the New York cheese cake.”

  “Make that two,” Clint said. “And could you bring us another bottle of wine?”

  “Sure. I’ll bring it right out.”

  “You’re not trying to get me drunk, are you, Travers?” Cassie quipped. “Get the lady drunk and work your wiles on her.”

  “That’s a thought, but I’m not in a rush,” he drawled, clinking his glass against hers. “The night is long, but we do have to be back in the pavilion by the morning to catch up with your broodmares. You want to get the best you can afford.”

  Cassie brought the wine glass to her lips. “This is your world, isn’t it? You don’t bat an eye dealing with these high prices. You’re a much more sophisticated fellow than you like to project at the Downs or at the ranch.”

  Shaking his head, Clint gave her his best boyish smile. “I don’t know about that. I do okay, I suppose, but I much prefer working with a yearling in a round pen or taking a two year old out to a training track.

  “Still, I’ll probably be able
to make a fifty percent profit on Hip Number 12, if not more. This world gets crazy at times. I sometimes can’t believe what people are willing to spend. Yet, we might decide to have you race her. Or, given her breeding, she would make an excellent broodmare for the ranch or for the McHenry farm. You know she’s a chestnut. Reminds me a lot of Cassie’s Hope.”

  - o -

  Cassie watched Clint carefully, sensing he was switching the conversation back again to a much more intimate level. They’d enjoyed sharing dreams about the yearlings and had playfully skirted issues that still remained between them. But no longer. Those earlier declarations of love weren’t going to be enough.

  He wanted more than that. So did she. Here we go, she sighed, as goose bumps scurried to find a safe place on her arms.

  “You know, Cassidy, I’ve only loved one other woman,” Clint said. “She was the mother of my children. I don’t take love lightly at all.”

  “I know you don’t,” Cassie murmured, trying not to roll the napkin into a tight ball.

  “I want you to marry me,” he declared simply. The flash of desire in his eyes made her knees go weak. “I want you to be a mother for Lester and Sammy. I want you to be the mother of our children yet to be born.”

  Cassie’s heartbeat stopped and then leaped of its own accord. Her vision fogged over.

  “I love you, Cassidy. Will you marry me? Will you dream with me?” Clint asked, reaching across the table the table to stroke her cheek lightly.

  She’d waited through a lot of agony to hear that question. Now she wanted to savor it, but there was no time for that. The corners of her mouth turned up happily. She reached across the table to interlace her fingers with his. Her voice was calm and exuded strength. Her words were uttered without hesitation. “I love you, Clint. Yes, I will marry you. I want us to chase dreams together. I want to be the mother of our children.”

  She leaned over to brush her lips across his. He chewed lightly on her lower lip and then let her sit back.

  Cassie choked more out. “I want you take me to my room now, Mr. Travers. I want to touch my man all over. I want you to touch me all over. I want to love and be loved.”

  “You’ll get no argument from me on that, my lady,” Clint said, scrawling his signature on the credit card slip.

  Much later, she luxuriated in his touch, in his feel. As soon as they’d reached her room, they’d made love fast and furious. They’d been in a pell-mell rush, as if to close the distance that had separated them for weeks. That had been bone crushingly fantastic. This was delightfully sweet.

  Intertwined side by side, facing each other, his cock filling her completely, they hardly moved, yet she sensed another wave building from deep within. He laved a hardened nipple. She ran her nails lightly across his back. His fingers grazed her bare nape, as if trying to memorize its texture and indentations. Subtle movements flickered back and forth. Her pussy clenched around his shaft, causing him to groan. She watched his eyes follow her hand as she reached between them to graze her clit. She blew him a kiss, knowing how much that simple gesture turned him on. He swelled deep within her.

  “Now,” she heard him say hoarsely. She braced herself for the final charge.

  “Faster,” she murmured. “Fuck me. Love me.”

  The wave enveloped her. She crested as he released. Not wanting him to withdraw anytime soon, she hooked a leg around his butt and held him in place. He lurched into her one more time, depositing more of his essence. She hugged him tightly.

  At last she let herself bask in the afterglow of lovemaking—and in the six dozen yellow long stem roses that had greeted her on returning to her room. Clint had spent a very busy afternoon.

  Again, she felt him busy himself by nibbling the base of her throat. Would she ever grow tired of his loving attention? Never.

  “You know,” she said, “you haven’t commented on my hair. Are you disappointed I had it cut?”

  “Nonsense,” Clint murmured. “You’d be beautiful if you were bald.”

  Cassie giggled. “I don’t think I’ll try that anytime soon. But do you like it? It would take some time to grow it back, but I would.”

  “No. I like it a lot,” he confided. “The long hair made you appear sultry and I loved playing with it, but this style actually makes you look, if anything, breezier and even sexier. And it’s much easier get to this sensitive skin.”

  He laced her neck with butterfly kisses; her skin drank deeply of his wet caresses.

  “That feels so good. I think I’ll keep my hair short, at least for awhile.

  Moments later, Clint asked, “Cassie, did you ever show the kids your Bears night-shirt?”

  “That old thing? Goodness, no,” Cassie said scowling. “Why in the world do you ask that?”

  “Oh, just wondering.”

  Surprised but not disappointed, Cassie felt Clint’s cock harden once again. She squeezed him, letting him know she was still there, still wanting. They might not get any sleep tonight, but there would be many more nights for that.

  Late on Thursday, Cassie’s spirits surged wildly. She sat alongside Clint in his pickup. They were pulling into his ranch driveway. His recent purchases were in the trailer they hauled behind them, and her horses were being vanned to Chicago.

  Clint brought the rig to a stop. Lester tugged at the passenger door handle. Sammy stood by him with arms held wide waiting for a hug. Happily, Cassie jumped down to hug both of them. Her children. She held nothing back. They’d share a lot of joys and a lot of pains. At times she’d mess up, but even that would be okay. They would all learn to grow together, and she knew the entire family would be there to help her.

  Silver Hawk stepped closer. Cassie rose to greet the woman with a warm embrace.

  “Welcome back, Cass,” Silver Hawk said. “I knew you wouldn’t let my idiot brother screw things up for good. But it sure has taken some time.”

  Cassie could not contain her smile. “Well, we both contributed to making it look pretty bleak there for awhile, and we both worked hard to get it back together.”

  “No matter.” Silver Hawk shrugged. “You’re here, and that’s what counts.”

  “When’s the wedding?” Lester asked, pulling on Cassie’s hand to get her attention.

  “You, young man,” Cassie chided, “are going to have to have more patience with women. But then your father took years to learn such patience,” she quipped as Clint joined his family. “I guess there’s hope for you. Yes, we have discussed the wedding.”

  “Hurrah!” both children screamed.

  Behind the children, Silver Hawk nodded her head, beaming brightly.

  “We’d like it to be in December,” Cassie said. “Lester, would you mind if we don’t do it in Chicago? If we get married there, I don’t think Grandmother Littlefield would be able to come. We really think she needs to be there.”

  “Me too. She’s got to be there,” Lester agreed. “But can your father come out?”

  Cassie put an arm around the boy, appreciating his concern. “Yes, we’ll fly him out along with my three girlfriends. He’s doing much better now than when you last saw him. And the girls will take good care of him.”

  “Then where will the wedding be?” Lester persisted.

  “Probably in Salt Lake City. Then we can all make a holiday of it.” She winked at Clint. She didn’t need to go into all the details of their planning. Clint didn’t particularly want to get married in the church where he’d wedded his first wife, so they’d decided on Salt Lake.

  - o -

  Later that afternoon, Clint took his family by his mother’s house to share their news. He was not at all surprised to see the matriarch of the family, his grandmother, sitting at the kitchen table when they entered.

  His mother greeted Cassie by clasping her hands between her own. “Welcome, Ms. O’Hanlon. It is good to see you.”

  “Oh, thank you so much,” Cassie cried out, seemingly unable to stop grinning. “It’s great to be here.”

>   “So you two finally found each other,” Mrs. Littlefield said. “It’s about time. I’m not getting any younger.”

  “Grandmother,” Clint admonished.

  “No, you are all here,” the old woman said. “That can only mean one thing. And your marriage makes me very happy.”

  Clint cleared his throat to speak.

  “No,” Mrs. Littlefield said, holding up her hand, “I am not finished.” She looked around at all the smiling faces, and her eyes sparkled. “You all sometimes think I’m a little touched in the head. Now don’t shake your heads. I know so. But it don’t matter. It’s a gift of age.

  “Fire Woman, I bring a present for you. Wear it on your wedding day. It would please this old woman much.” Reaching down the front of her dress, Mrs. Littlefield brought forth a carefully tissue wrapped object.

  The old woman held in her hands the most beautiful blue sapphire and silver necklace Cassie had ever seen. Her eyes blurred with tears of awe and joy.

  “It was handmade generations ago by my great-grandfather,” the elder woman said with pride, handing the gift to Cassie. “I knew it was yours when I first saw you. She who wears this will be charmed through the years with a loving family who will walk with her though pain and much joy.”

  EPILOGUE

  Cassidy O’Hanlon Travers sat beside her husband at their wedding reception table surrounded by family and friends. At least for the moment, all was perfect with the world.

  It’d been the kind of wedding she’d hoped for. The pastor had been thrilled to plan a wedding ceremony with them. Turned out he was an avid horse racing fan and was very pleased when he opened the envelope Clint had pressed in his hand to find not only his fee but also two season passes to the following summer’s races at Wyoming Downs. His lovely wife had played Cassie’s favorite wedding music on the organ.

  The church’s small chapel, decorated for the Christmas season, turned out to be a charming, inspirational setting for the wedding. Just the right size for their small gathering.