The Reluctant Sister (Reluctant Series Book 3)

by Melanie Brown

  He lifted my chin up, his eyes penetrating deep into my soul, then bent down and kissed me with the kind of long, slow, deep kiss that will curl your toes. I could have stayed all night on the porch with that kiss.

  Jeff finally pulled away, and for a moment, just looked at me, “Baby, I don’t want to, but I probably should be going.”

  It was only then that I started noticing the cold, “Yeah, we probably should call it a night.” I felt tears welling up again as I continued, “Thank you for the wonderful evening. It was really great!” Especially the last five minutes.

  Jeff gave me a little brief kiss, held my hand and said, “Good night, Chrissy. I love you.” And then, he turned to walk towards his car. The snow was now coming down hard and there was already a blanket of snow on Jeff’s car.

  I held myself tightly. I was so wound up; I was about to explode. I said, “Good night, Jeff. I love you, too!” He waved as he climbed into his car. I watched his car fade into the falling snow.

  * * *

  As I shut the front door behind me, I saw Mom sitting on the couch, reading a book. She looked up at me and asked, “Oh, hi dear. How was your evening?” I had a sneaking suspicion that Mom had been standing by the door, watching us through the tall, narrow windows framing the door.

  I sat down next to Mom and said as I smoothed my dress, “It was so cool, Mom! Dinner was just perfect, and he took me to the ballet!”

  “Sounds like a wonderful time,” Mom said. It seemed to me that something was bothering her.

  “Oh, it was!” I beamed. I paused a moment, then frowned before asking, “Is there something wrong?”

  Mom put her book down and stared at nothing for a moment before replying, “Well, Honey, it’s... well... I have to admit, I was listening through the door. We used to do it all the time with Diane as well.”

  “You spied on us?!” I asked, my mood starting to break.

  “I wouldn’t exactly use the word ‘spied’...” Mom’s voice trailed off.

  “What did you hear and why does it bother you?” I asked, folding my arms.

  “I heard enough. It bothers me that you told a boy you love him. Is that really fair to say that to him?” Mom asked.

  “What do you mean, is that fair? I do love him, and he loves me.” Why does my mood always have to be ruined?

  “The word ‘love’ doesn’t always mean the same thing to boys as it does to... uh... us,” Mom said, “and where will your love lead you? I don’t want to see you hurt, and considering the circumstances, I don’t want to see Jeff hurt either.”

  “I don’t know,” I said weakly. “Nobody plans these things. They just happen!”

  Mom shook her head and said, “Oh, God! This is just too hard! If you were Diane and had just told a boy of your love for him, I would know how to handle this. If you as Christopher had just told a girl you loved her, both your father and I would know. But this, I just don’t know what to do.” Mom finished by throwing her hands into the air.

  I looked down at my hands; once again, my good mood and total feminine spirit had been destroyed in a twinkling. Fighting back tears, I asked softly, “Can’t you just be happy for me?”

  Mom just looked at me and blinked for several moments. She moved closer to me and put her arm around my shoulder and gave me a hug. She said, “Of course I can, dear. I want you to be happy.” She looked thoughtful for a moment, “You know, at first I really hated when you joined the cheerleaders and started going to school as a girl. I really thought it was going to be a disaster.”

  I frowned, “Gee thanks, Mom.”

  “Sorry, but it seemed like a crazy idea at the time. I have to say though, that for me, I’ve enjoyed having a daughter again, with long, beautiful hair that I can brush and braid — someone to girl talk with, to go shopping together, to polish each other’s toenails with...” Mom smiled a small smile, “Since Diane has been gone to college, I’ve forgotten what simple pleasures there are to having a daughter around. She’s gotten too grown up for some of these things, anyway. Then Chrissy came along.”

  Smiling, I hugged Mom and rested my head on her shoulder. I had been spending more time with Mom lately — shopping, helping in the kitchen, crying over soap operas.

  I was suddenly bothered by Mom stiffening slightly as she continued, “But this new development... I... I just have a hard time with it. I’m glad you have found love, and Jeff seems like a really nice boy. Even your father likes him, and he never liked any of Diane’s boyfriends. If you were a girl, I’d be giving you the usual warning about boys, but with you, I’m concerned on several levels.”

  “Mom, what do you think Jeff and I are going to do?” I asked, shocked that Mom might be thinking what I thought she was thinking.

  “That’s exactly it. What are you and Jeff going to do?” Mom asked, but I could tell she wasn’t expecting an answer. “I’m worried that you might get so caught up in being Jeff’s girlfriend that you’ll want something Jeff isn’t likely to give you, or Jeff may decide he’d prefer a girl that was born that way.”

  Just what I thought… she was thinking what I thought she was thinking. In my heightened emotional state, her words cut rather deeply, and I could feel tears welling up again. With a cry in my voice, I asked, “Mom, how can you say things like that? Jeff and I love each other! How could he want anyone else?”

  Mom smiled and brushed away a tear from my cheek. She said quietly, “Baby-doll, I just don’t want to see you get hurt. I want you to be careful, and don’t get too carried away.”

  I held onto Mom and started to cry softly on her shoulder. I’m not completely sure why. Once again, my happy feelings were dashed into the ground.

  * * *

  As I lay in bed that night, I replayed Jeff’s kiss over and over in my head. I relived the wonderful date Jeff and I had that evening. I just lay there, watching the cold, blue shaft of moonlight splash across the room and daydreamed about how life would be with just us two.

  * * *

  Chapter 3

  I awoke to a room saturated with bright light. The bed was so warm and cozy; I just didn’t feel like getting up. Then, I remembered that Gwen had said to come by in the morning to put in an application at the theater.

  Pulling off my nightgown to get in the shower, I looked out the window. The sun was shining brightly on the new fallen snow. Good, I thought. Maybe the roads won’t be so bad when I drive over to the mall.

  Before darting across the hall to the bathroom and the shower, I laid out my panties and bra, jeans and my pink turtleneck sweater. As I started to pick up my bathrobe, I paused and looked at myself in the mirror. From the neck up, even without makeup, I saw the face of a cute teen girl, hair cascading down past her shoulders. From the neck down, all I saw was the body of a gawky teen boy, pathetically low on muscle mass. I looked myself up and down and frowned. What I saw bothered me. The longer I looked, the more bothered I became. I shuddered and then quickly put on my robe.

  * * *

  As I bounded into the kitchen, Dad looked up from his newspaper and paused in his breakfast long enough to say, “Morning, Princess.”

  “Good morning, Daddy!” I said as I grabbed a bowl from the cupboard. The cereal was already on the table. I sat and started pouring cornflakes into the bowl.

  “I heard you had quite an evening,” Dad peered over the top of his newspaper.

  “Oh! Yes!” I flashed a big smile. “Gladstone’s is wonderful! I want to go there again. Jeff then took me to a ballet! Can you imagine?” I took a bite and continued, “Then the snow really started coming down. It was so beautiful and very romantic.” Maybe I shouldn’t have added that last part.

  Dad looked like he was about to say something, but he paused and looked away for a moment, then working up a smile he said, “You’re all up and at-em this morning. What have you got going?”

  “I’m going to the theater to apply for a job,” I said smiling.

  Dad put his newspaper down and rested his chi
n on his hand and raised an eyebrow. “A job, eh? At the theater?” I nodded and Dad continued, “That’s great. I don’t think your sister worked the whole time she was in high school.”

  “Well, with cheerleading and all the clubs and stuff it’s like, pretty hard to fit a job into a schedule.” I took another bite then continued, “I’m just going to work there until Christmas break so I can get a little extra Christmas money.”

  Dad nodded for a moment and looked like he was reading something on the paper that was now spread on the table, “What made to you decide to pick the movie theater?”

  “You remember Eddie’s sister, Gwen? She’s been the manager there for a couple of years. She knows who I am. I’ve already talked to her about it,” I said as I finished off the cornflakes.

  Looking up at me, Dad asked, “On the application, which box for gender are you going to check, male or female?”

  I frowned and said defensively, “Gee Dad, what do you think?”

  “I’m asking you.” Dad said, still looking at me intently.

  “Dad, what do you see when you look at me?” I asked, flipping my hair back.

  He didn’t answer right away. He said, “Honestly?” I nodded again. “To be honest, I see Diane... with darker hair.” He frowned and continued, “I don’t see my son at all.”

  “I’m still here, Dad. It’s still me, but this is the way I am for now,” I said.

  Dad sighed, “What did I do wrong, Chris? Where did I fail you?”

  “You didn’t, Dad,” I said earnestly. “You’re not at fault.” No, I thought, I can blame this upheaval in my life on Ed and his harebrained scheme a few years back. Well, true, he can’t be blamed for me becoming a cheerleader.

  “Am I ever getting my son back,” his eye twitched slightly, “or am I going to be giving the bride away one day?”

  My face reddened as I blurted, “Bride!? That’s crazy!” Hmmm, Mrs. Jeff Kowalski. I could live with that! To Dad I said, “In fact, during the Christmas break, I’m going to go back to being a boy.”

  “That’s good. It’ll be good to have you back,” said Dad, “but, you need a haircut.”

  “I’m not cutting my hair!” I said, folding my arms.

  “Well, anyway, when we drive up for Diane’s graduation, I want you to be Christopher. I don’t want her to have to deal with her brother wearing dresses and make-up until she comes home,” said Dad flatly.

  I didn’t like his tone, but I said, “Sure, okay. I can do that.”

  Dad went back to pretending to read the paper, his hands fidgeting. Finally, looking at me sideways, he asked, “How are you and Jeff getting along?”

  I knew what he as asking, but I just said simply, “Good. We’re getting along good.”

  “How good is that?” Dad asked as he looked at me squarely.

  I hesitated, started to say something else, but thought oh what the hell? “We love each other Daddy. There’s no one else in the world I’d rather be with.”

  It was ever so slightly, but Dad winced. His eye began to twitch, and it was obvious he found it difficult to speak. He folded his paper and rested his head in both hands for a moment, and then looked back at me, “Hmmm. Really now? That’s something I never thought I’d hear my own son say – at least not about a boy.”

  “Dad, I’m sorry but I’m really not trying to hurt you or Mom. Getting a boyfriend wasn’t why I became a cheerleader,” I said as I felt tears welling up again. “Our love just sorta grew.”

  Dad coughed, looked out the kitchen window briefly, then turned back to me and said, “Your mother and I discussed this before you got up. She told me what she saw on the front porch last night.” He paused again, looking away. “You’re still my son!” he suddenly barked. His face softened and with resignation in his voice, he continued, “But your mother and I decided not to stand in your way. We feel that if we forbid you to see Jeff anymore, you’re likely to do something even more stupid.”

  Gee, thanks for the confidence, but I said, “I told Mom I wouldn’t let myself get carried away. I know this situation is temporary. Although...” I let my voice trail away. Dad raised an eyebrow expectantly. Quietly I continued, “I like being a girl.”

  * * *

  I felt some relief as I stepped through the doors of the mall. It was just nice to get away from the house and all the tension building there. The movie theater was right by the entrance, so I decided to stop by and see about getting the job. I tried the door but the theater wasn’t open yet and the door was locked. I looked through the windows, but I couldn’t see Gwen anywhere. ‘I’ll come back a little later’, I thought.

  The mall had only been open a few minutes, and about the only people around were the mall walkers who arrive before any of the stores open. I stopped in front of the computer software store and just looked in. I used to spend quite a bit of time and Dad’s money in that store. I hadn’t set foot in it once since I became a cheerleader. I had no idea what the latest games were. That reminded me that Joey Saotome hadn’t invited me to any LAN parties in a while. I’ll have to talk to him about that when school started back up again.

  The window promotional at the dress store next door to the software store caught my eye. It was about the line of prom dresses they were going to have available after the first of the year. The prom! I hadn’t really thought about it until right then. I looked at one of the pictures of a pretty prom dress in the promotional, then closed my eyes and imagined myself in the dress, dancing at the prom with Jeff. The thought almost made me giddy.

  “Hey, Frankenstein!” a familiar female voice called from behind me, jarring me out of my daydream. I turned and it was Gwen. “Are you here to see me?”

  I nodded, “Yep. You said to come by and fill out the paperwork.”

  As we started walking back to the theater, Gwen nodded her head back towards the dress store and said, “Starting to think about what to wear to the prom, eh? Has Jeff asked you yet?”

  “No, it’s still too early,” I said. “I’m sure he will though.”

  Gwen glanced toward me as she was unlocking the theater door, “Oh really? How do you figure that?”

  I just smiled.

  Gwen paused as she was opening the door and groaned, “You didn’t say you loved him, did you?”

  I smiled, nodded, and said, “Yep. Right after he said he loved me.”

  “Man, this just keeps getting worse and worse!” Gwen sighed as she unlocked her office door. Gwen motioned for me to sit down. “Well, since you won’t listen to me anyway, I guess that’s neither here nor there. Here, take a few minutes to fill these out, and be sure to sign them,” Gwen handed me a small stack of paper that was the job application.

  I studied the sheets for a moment. I asked, “Which box do I check for gender?”

  Gwen frowned and said, “Either way, if you’re found out, we’ll both be in a world of shit, so let’s minimize the odds some by checking ‘Female’.”

  Gwen looked over my application for a few moments and said, “Well, other than your little gender confusion, there’s no reason I can’t hire you right now. Can you start today?”

  “Today? I thought you said I’d start Saturday!” I whined.

  Gwen frowned and said, “Well, I do have all slots filled for today anyway. How about tomorrow? I’m short for Thursday.”

  I shook my head and said, “That’s Thanksgiving! I’ll be spending the day with Jeff!”

  Gwen was visibly ticked. She frowned at me again before saying, “Would it please the princess to consider working Friday?”

  I thought a moment. If I’d been anyone else, Gwen would have already have told them she wasn’t hiring them. I said, “Yes, that would please her.”

  “Good,” said Gwen. “I’ll schedule you for two to six o’clock. It’s usually fairly slow then, so we can get you trained pretty quick.”

  “Two to Six? But that’s when I was going to,” Gwen’s withering stare cut me off in mid-sentence. So I said, “Well,
I’ll uh I’ll be doing nothing.”

  “Well okay then,” Gwen said. “I guess we’ll see you Friday at two.”

  I sat there for a moment and then said, “You know, you’re the second person to call me ‘princess’ this morning.”

  Gwen let out a short laugh, “It’s because you’re getting more and more like Diane every day. There were times when she could be such a bitch!”

  * * *

  It was official. I was now gainfully employed, even if it was just a temporary job. I was carrying my new blue denim shirt and ball cap both sporting the theater’s logo. I had to supply my own black pants.