To Be Your Girl (To Be Yours Book 1)

by Rae Kennedy

  Bed-head guy looks me up and down, lingers at the boobs, as usual, but lands squarely on my eyes. I swear his dark brown eyes twinkle at me. “Who’s this?” He doesn’t even wait for Cade’s response. He takes my hand and pulls me into the booth with him. I slide in rather clumsily, trying to use my free hand to hold my short skirt down. Cade is grinning as he scoots in after us, sitting hip-to-hip with me.

  “Guys, this is Haley,” Cade tells me bed-head guy is Logan. He plays the guitar. Logan winks at me when Cade says this.

  Next is the drummer. He has the fairest skin and faint red freckles all over his face and hands. I suspect they are all over his arms as well, but they’re covered up by tattoos. His eyes are super pale, framed by blond eyelashes and red eyebrows. His hair is also likely red but bleached to almost white. He gives me a shy smile and a nod when Cade introduces him as Joey.

  The bassist, Dean, is studying my face and though his expression is much more serious than Logan’s, and he has more piercings, his dark brown eyes are the same. His whole face is eerily the same actually, yet different. Logan and Dean are twins—identical twins. I don’t think I would have known if Logan hadn’t mentioned it.

  Lastly, sitting directly across from me is the lead singer, Colin. He is all covered up again in long sleeves but I can see his hands are tattooed as well as the sides of his neck. Everything about him seems sort of dark—his dark buzzed hair, black tattoos, black eyebrows, black gauges, thick lashes. But then these bright blue eyes. They are mesmerizing. And looking right through me. I see his lips start to creep into a smile when I realize I’m totally staring at him. Cade puts his arm around my shoulders and my trance instantly breaks as I turn to him.

  He smiles at me with his perfect white teeth. “Can I get you something to eat? Drink?”

  “Yeah.” I’m starving.

  I have a couple of beers and some chicken strips. I notice Cade doesn’t have more than a few sips of his beer, but the rest of the guys make up for that. They don’t take shots, just swigs straight from the bottle in between chugging their huge frothed glasses.

  Dean and Logan are arguing over whether there is ever a need for two guitarists in a band. Dean has some very verbose and philosophical responses, but Logan yells the loudest and is pronounced the winner by default as he slams down the bottle of whiskey and gets the last word in. Dean grabs the bottle and tosses back a huge gulp as he flips his brother off.

  Meanwhile, Joey’s gone from pale-white to bright-red with drink. His cheeks are glowing like they’ve been slapped, repeatedly. He has become very giggly and is starting to talk much louder than is necessary for us to reasonably hear him. Cade is laughing over my head with Logan about some roadie stalker they finally got to stop inviting herself on tour. His arm has been wrapped around me all night, his thumb constantly stroking my shoulder.

  “She was convinced that she and Colin were in love and going to get married or some shit.”

  “It probably wouldn’t have gotten to that level,” Dean chimes in, “if she hadn’t been led on.”

  “I never said a fucking word to her,” Colin says, leaning back.

  “Not you! Joey. He screwed her.”

  “What!” Joey practically screams it. “That was like three years ago.”

  I can’t tell if he’s blushing because he’s embarrassed or if he’s so hot he’s going to pass out. Either way, his face looks like a fire hydrant.

  “Don’t lie. Gingers don’t get laid. You wouldn’t know what to do with a pussy if it put itself around your cock.”

  Joey throws his empty beer bottle at Colin, who doesn’t even flinch. It misses him by at least a foot.

  “That kind of comes with the territory because of the whole no soul thing, right?” Logan asks Joey, looking very concerned. Joey, I can tell, is used to this ribbing and while flustered, gives up the argument.

  “So, Haley..."

  I turn my gaze from Joey’s flaming cheeks to the electric blue eyes across from me. Colin asks, “Are you Cade’s girlfriend or what?”

  My immediate reaction is to say no. I don’t know what we are, but girlfriend? That doesn’t seem—

  “Yes,” Cade answers, as he softly strokes my arm. Colin seems surprised. Not as much as I am.

  My boyfriend? It’s too weird to say it like that. But he is mine. His sexy ass is mine. His perfect lips are mine. His beautiful smile is mine. I suddenly want to kiss every inch of his smooth skin, from the little bump in his nose right down across his sculpted abs...and now I realize I have my hand on his upper thigh. I squeeze it and he looks at me, his crystal blue eyes the happiest I’ve seen them.

  “Never thought it’d happen, Renner. I’m glad,” Colin says approvingly.

  Logan and Cade start busting each other’s chops about something. All I can think about is Cade’s hard thigh as I slide my hand up it. I squeeze it again, not realizing that I’m squeezing my legs together too. Dammit, the leather seat under me is totally wet.

  The guys are all laughing and pounding more drinks. I inch my fingers up to Cade’s hip and over just a little and I can feel it. He’s fully erect under my hand. I bite my lip to keep from sighing heavily as I tighten my hand around his cock. I wish we were alone right now. Cade lets his hand fall to my bare knee. I watch his angular jaw as he talks. I spread my legs apart just a little, and he takes the hint instantly.

  His demeanor never changes. He just continues talking tattoos with Dean as his fingers graze the inside of my thigh. My fingers are still around his erection. He’s taking his time, giving me goosebumps and making my tummy flutter. My clitoris is literally buzzing. Like, I wonder if Logan can hear it. I’m still just watching Cade’s face though.

  He finally reaches my wetness, his fingers slipping in it. A huge smile hits his face as he realizes I’m panty-less, but his conversation doesn’t skip a beat. I don’t think I’m as concealing as I’m pretty sure I let out a little “oh” when he promptly shoves his middle finger all the way inside my soaked pussy. It knocks the air out of me and I reach for my beer. I take a long sip, closing my eyes as Cade’s slick finger circles around my bud, hoping that the bottle hides my face.

  “Don’t you think so, Haley?” Logan is looking at me expectantly, grabbing a fistful of fries from my plate and eating them casually. As though we were BFFs who had shared food on many an occasion. Cade now has two fingers moving parallel between my burning folds.

  I try to snap out of it. “I’m sorry. I must have totally spaced out.”

  “Don’t you think Cade should move back to the city? I mean, at least we’d get to see him more than once every two years like we have since he quit the band.”

  His finger presses right into my clit and I almost choke on my last sip. I try to cover it up with a cough. I think it was pretty smooth. “Cade was in the band?”

  “Oh what! This guy? He never told you he was in our band?”

  I shake my head.

  “He and Colin started it when we were like fourteen.”

  I’m trying not to be distracted as Cade rubs me faster. Then slower. Then faster. I try to stay engaged in the conversation. I look around the table.

  “So, you’ve got a bassist, singer, drummer, and guitarist.” I land on Cade, who looks cool and calm. “What did you play?”

  His fingers slow considerably, barely touching me at all. “It’s not a big deal—"

  “No! Give it up, dude!” Joey yells from the end of the table, still as red as a beet and definitely the drunkest at the table.

  I look right into Cade’s eyes. I think this is the first time I’ve seen him even a little embarrassed. He eyes me, tongue pressed against his teeth, looking devilish. Then he sinks two fingers inside me.

  “He played the keyboard.” Dean rats him out.

  I start giggling much louder than I ought to at that. Cade finger-fucks me even harder. I’m still laughing, but to be honest, it’s to keep myself from moaning or screaming.

  “You think that’s funny?�
� Cade’s being coy with me.

  I stifle my laughs and shake my head.

  “Yeah, his grandma had him take piano lessons since he was like five or some shit, right?”

  “Yeah,” Cade answers Joey, but he’s looking at me. I don’t know how he knows when I’m about to come, but that’s when he stops.

  “Since you were five? That’s adorable.”

  All the guys immediately start making exaggerated “aww” sounds and Cade rolls his eyes.

  “Seriously, man, you were seriously skilled. We’d take you back any day,” Colin says.

  “Sorry, guys.” His hot fingers start rubbing me again. “I’m using these talented fingers for cooking now...among other things.” He smirks just for me.

  As he pushes his fingers inside me quickly I gasp out, “Yes!” and, thinking fast, follow it up with, “Very talented indeed.”

  Colin smiles at me.

  I have been on the verge of coming for the last ten minutes. But he hasn’t let me. It’s been torture. The guys get sloppier. Logan finishes eating my cold fries. Joey tries to get anyone to partake in an arm-wrestling match with him (even me), Dean looks like he is about to pass out, and Cade stops touching me altogether while getting into an animated discussion with Colin, who is trying to convince us to go to an after-hours party.

  Cade insists that we need to get home and we get up to leave.

  “Bye. It was nice meeting you all.”

  “I’m a hugger.” Logan gets up and, yep, gives me a hug. Cade too.

  * * *

  Cade shuts the car door and I attack before he can even put the keys in the ignition. I can’t quite reach his face so my lips settle for kissing and sucking on his neck. I’m clumsily trying to get to him over the center console, almost getting a gear shift up my butt and definitely getting an emergency brake jabbed in my knee cap. I finally get to him as he lifts my hips and helps me over. Our lips are instantly devouring one another.

  My hands are in his hair. It’s soft and long enough on top for me to wrap my fingers in it. His breath tastes like peppermint and I feel like I haven’t kissed him in days instead of hours. He grips my hips tight and then he pulls up my short skirt. His hands move to my behind, squeezing me against him.

  I can feel the huge bulge through his jeans and rub up against it. He meets each one of my thrusts while digging his fingers deeper into my bare ass. It sends tingles all down through my inner legs to my toes and back up to just behind my ears. I’m panting.

  Every time he turns his tongue into my mouth, I imagine another of his body parts sinking in and out of me. I’m pretty sure I’m making the crotch of his pants embarrassingly wet. Let’s just get those out of the way. I put my fingers on his top button.

  “Fuck.” He’s breathing erratically and hard.

  “Cade, I can’t wait until we get home. I want you now.”

  “Okay.” He kisses me harder and slides his hand over my bum and up to my opening that’s dripping with need. He moans deep in his throat. “Let’s go somewhere more private.”

  I reluctantly fall to the passenger seat so that he can drive. My pulse is rapid. The car smells like Cade and sex. I watch him as he drives (extra aggressively) through the city.

  He looks good in black. He looks good driving a stick.

  I watch his leg flex as he depresses the clutch and his tattooed arm as it effortlessly shifts. I watch his eyes as he flicks them to and from the rearview mirror—I can’t tell they’re blue in this light but they’re beautiful. As he turns his head, I look at his square jaw and sinewy neck muscles. He throws me a smile as we turn off the main road. I don’t care where we are going. As long as I am with him. Always.

  The road becomes gravel and dirt, bumpy. It twists and turns. As we climb some serious elevation, I catch glimpses of the city lights in the distance. Finally, he turns out to an even rockier road and we come to a secluded clearing. The entire city is laid out before us, twinkling against the black.

  “Wow. It’s beautiful.”

  He sits and smiles at me. “This is one of my favorite places.”

  I’m like a little kid seeing a Christmas tree for the first time. In awe. “Yeah? Did you come up here often when you lived here?”

  “I did.”

  “This would be amazing to photograph.”

  “You should take up photography.”

  “Yeah?” I like that idea. I don’t know why I haven’t considered it much before. “Maybe I will.” He takes my hand and we just look at the view for a little while. “My dad used to have this old Nikon F from the seventies he would let me experiment with. I was in love with that camera. That’s what a picture like this needs. A manual SLR. Automatic cameras can never get it just right.” I’m babbling.

  “You and your dad were close.” It wasn’t a question really. I look at him and he looks like he’s thinking about something.

  “What about you? What about your parents?” I hope I didn’t just ruin the mood.

  He looks at me, contemplating. “I didn’t know them.” He says it matter-of-factly. “My mother was young and an addict. She dropped me off with my grandma one day when I was three and left.”

  I’m not sure how to respond. I’m never good in these kinds of situations. So I just squeeze his hand a little. He looks at me, lovingly.

  “It’s all fine, Hale. I’m well past it. She would visit every once in a while until I was about nine, I think? Never met my dad. He probably doesn’t even know I exist. I’m not mad about it anymore. I had a good childhood. My grandmother was a great lady...” He sort of trails off and looks out over the city. I want to ask him more but I don’t think I should pry.

  He changes the subject quickly, climbing into the backseat. “Now get your ass over here already!” He says with a huge grin on his face.

  I crawl between the front bucket seats and into his lap. He’s got his jeans pulled down to his knees and I have to hike my skirt up to my waist in order to straddle him. He’s got both hands on my thighs, rubbing them softly up and down. I’m aching for him.

  My hands are on either side of his face and we are looking right at each other. I kiss his nose, then his cheeks and his forehead. A low growl comes from his chest as he searches for my mouth with his. When our lips connect, it is soft and pure. Warm and perfect. I am sitting on him, skin-to-skin and I can feel his shaft between my slipperiness. I slide against it slowly, its head rubbing my clit just right as we both moan quietly through our kisses. He lifts my hips up and gets a condom out of his pocket. He has it on quickly.

  “Whenever you’re ready.” He whispers against my lips.

  I kiss him for a few more moments, clinging to his neck. His hands firmly grasp my hips and as I make a move toward him, he helps guide me down.

  I sink onto him. Slow and deep.

  He stretches me. It aches.

  Our foreheads touching, mouths just an inch apart, he lets his breath out completely, his eyelids hooding as I take his full length inside of me. He is looking right into my eyes with his perfect blue ones.

  “Hale...I...” His breath hitches as I raise myself up and plunge back down again. He throws his head back and I love how powerful I feel. How vulnerable he is to me right now.

  “I love...this,” he whispers. He wraps his arms around my waist and kisses my neck. He holds me to him the whole time, letting me set the pace. His hair tickles at my cheek and I can smell that fresh scent. I would be happy if this is the only scent I ever smell again.

  CHAPTER 18

  I must have fallen asleep in the car. I am awoken by the light in my eyes when Cade opens the door and a cold rush of air hits my bare legs. I whine in protest. Just let me stay here—I’ll sleep half hunched over on this leather seat with a crook in my neck all night, I swear. But he insists I go inside.

  So he helps me up the front steps and takes me to his bed. I take off my shirt as he undresses to his navy boxer briefs. He rips my skirt straight down the ass when he tries to pull it off for m
e.

  “Damn, I really liked this skirt.”

  I yawn. “It was too small, anyway.”

  “That was a major factor in its appeal.”

  I try to slap his shoulder but miss by a good margin.

  “You’re so sleepy,” he says.

  “I am! You kept me up way too late.”

  He pulls the covers up over both of us and I settle onto his chest.

  “And on a school night, too,” I add.

  He chuckles softly and kisses my forehead. It relaxes every muscle in my body and I let myself go to sleep again.

  * * *

  There is a rustle of trees outside. A single trickle of light falls out beyond the curtain and I can see that it is just barely morning. I stretch my legs, taking a deep breath and reach for Cade but his side of the bed is empty. I roll to his pillow and bury my face in the smell of him. Pots and pans clank in the kitchen and I don’t want to get up but the promise of watching Cade in the kitchen is enough.

  I go to the bathroom. Whoa, my hair is out of control. Did Cade see it like that? Sure as shit he did. I tie it up on top of my head and throw on my most comfortable, albeit least attractive, pair of sweatpants.

  He is shirtless, just in his little boxer briefs, cracking an egg into a skillet when he looks up to me. “Morning, Sleeping Beauty.”

  I rub my left eye. “Don’t know about the beauty part, but morning.”

  “I hate when hot girls are all self-deprecating. You’re sexy, own it.”

  I roll my eyes. “Come on, look at these.” I point to my sweats. I’ve had them for five years—they’re worn out, washed out (I am no longer confident of what color they originally were), baggy, and have a hole in the knee.

  “Are you serious? Those fucking sweatpants! Drove me nuts the whole first month you lived here wearing those. Every time you’d come walking out in those, I’d lose it. I’d have to go jerk off to get rid of my hard-on.”

  I stare at him for a minute. “Um, what?” Disbelief.

  He walks over to me. “It’s because they are so loose, they just hang off your hips.” He puts his hands on my bare skin just above the waistband. “Every time I would think if I just pulled on them a little bit”—he pulls the waistband away from my hips—“they would just fall off.” And they do. Right to the floor go my pants and we are just standing there in our underwear.