by Mercy Amare
“It’s not like I’m expecting fireworks,” I tell him. “I know the probability of happily ever after with the first guy I have sex with is slim. I’m okay with that. I just don’t want to sleep with a hundred guys to figure out who the one is. I’m not even sure if I believe in the one. True love is just a fantasy created by Disney. But maybe I’ll be proven wrong.”
“I’d like to believe in true love — a love that never ends. But in my experience, it is just a myth. I won’t give up hope though. In the end, hope is all we have. Hoping for something is better than nothing.”
In that moment, I realize that I really don’t know Ty. But I want to know him. I didn’t expect his optimism. I didn’t expect him to be so sweet. I judged him prematurely.
Ty Newman is definitely somebody worth dating.
10:33 PM
Let me kiss you.
The concert was a blast. Though, when it comes to Ty, I think he could make anything fun.
“What did you think of the band?” Ty asks.
“They were a little too indie rock for my taste,” I answer. I hope it doesn’t offend him. “They really should have the blonde girl sing lead. She’s got an amazing voice. The guy tries way too hard.”
“I completely agree. I’ve told them that, but they don’t believe me. They said her voice is too pop.”
“No way!” I shake my head. “They have so much potential.”
“I know, right?” He shakes his head. “I didn’t know you were so into music. Do you play any instruments?”
“I wish, but no. What about you?”
“Nope. Some people are better at listening, and I am one of those people,” he admits.
I laugh. “I feel ya. I gave up after about ten guitar lessons when I was twelve. I just couldn’t get it. I wish I would have stuck with it now. Maybe I would have my own rock band if I had.”
As we pull into my driveway, I feel a little disappointed that the night is over. I am far from ready for it to be over.
“Did you have fun tonight?” he asks, as he pulls the car to a stop at the front of the circle drive.
“I did,” I admit. “I actually can’t remember the last time I had so much fun.”
“I like you.” Ty is studying me, like he’s trying to figure out what I’m thinking. Then his eyes glance down at my lips, and I realize what he wants. He wants to kiss me, but he doesn’t want to do anything I’m not ready for. “Kihanna?”
“Yeah?” I whisper. I’m afraid that if I speak too loud, the magical moment will be over.
“I’m going to kiss you,” he says boldly, giving me a chance to tell him to back off if I want. But I don’t want him to back off. I want this kiss.
I nod. “Okay.”
Ty slowly leans closer to me. His lips are half an inch away from mine. Close enough that I can feel the warmth from them. I bravely close the distance between us. Our lips touch, and Ty kisses me. His lips are so soft against mine. His kisses are sweet. I’m relieved to find that kissing isn’t hard. It feels completely natural. I just do exactly what Ty does. I move my lips to the same rhythm as him.
He puts his arms around my waist and pulls me closer. I put my hands on his chest. I want to feel more of him. I want to be closer to him. It’s like now that I’ve had a taste of him, it’s not enough. My thoughts surprise me, so I pull back gently.
“Wow,” I hear him say.
“Good wow, or bad wow?” I ask.
Even though it’s dark in the car, I can see that he has a huge smile on his face. “It’s definitely a good wow. An amazing wow.”
“Good,” I reach for the doorknob.
“I’ll walk you to the door.”
“If you do, will you kiss me again?” I ask.
He nods. “Definitely.”
“Good.”
Sunday, August 29
9:47 AM
Brunch 2.0
Sunday means it’s time for our weekly family meal. Last week, Dad had a work emergency and had to bail, so I faked sick. I didn’t want to go and hang out with Veronica, Toby, and the Johnson family alone. Thankfully Dad is coming today.
“No gothic clothes today, I see,” Toby says, as we walk down the stairs.
I look down at my pale yellow polo shirt and my khaki skirt. “It’s not really me, but anything to keep the peace. I figure I better not push my luck after the fight last Thursday.”
“They’ve already forgotten. Trust me.”
“Not likely,” I counter as we walk outside. “They still haven’t forgotten the devil clothes.”
Toby laughs. “Let’s hope brunch 2.0 is better.” He starts to get in his car.
“Can I ride with you?” I still find it strange that everybody in this family takes four separate cars to get to the same place.
He looks at me weird. “Ugh, sure.”
As I get into the car, I check my phone to see if Ty has sent me a text. He hasn’t. I’m not sure if he’s supposed to talk to me today. Last night was amazing. But I’m not sure if it was just a one night thing, or if he’s going to want to date more.
Maybe it’s too soon to be thinking about it, but I wonder if we will ever be more than friends. I never thought I would actually want to have a relationship with somebody before I went to college. I always thought high school romance was pointless. But I had fun with Ty. We could go to parties, school dances, concerts… And we’d get to make out. Besides, I definitely do not want to be a virgin when I’m a college freshman. Ty is experienced. He’d be the perfect guy to lose my virginity to.
I silently scold myself. Why am I thinking about this? I’ve gone on one date with him. For all I know, he thought I was lame.
“What are you thinking about so hard?” Toby asks.
“Nothing,” I quickly respond. “So does our family do everything with the Johnson family?”
“Unfortunately, yes,” he answers. “Dad’s company, and Jack Johnson’s company works together a lot, therefore we do everything together. Brunch is just the beginning, sis. We do holidays together, vacations, fundraisers, and on the rare occasion that we go to church, we do that together too.”
“At least Gabe is nice.” I’m trying to look on the bright side.
I think about Mom. I miss her. I miss our traditions. I know that I will adjust to my new family, but it’s going to take time. I can’t help but wonder what my life would be like if I was raised this way. Would I think this was normal? I can’t imagine it, but I know it must be true.
“Gabe’s not bad. He used to be a lot more fun before…” Toby’s voice trails off.
“Before what?”
“It’s not really my story to tell. You should wait for Gabe to tell you.”
I want to protest, but I know Toby’s right. I should hear Gabe’s story from Gabe.
“So are you going to tell me how last night’s date went?”
I can’t help but smile when he asks. “It was good. Ty was a gentleman. He was different than what I expected, too.”
“So you expected him to be a jerk?”
I shake my head. “Not exactly. But I didn’t expect him to be so… normal. Last night was one of the best nights of my life. He was sweet and chivalrous. It was a lot of fun.”
“But not too much fun, right?” Toby confirms.
I laugh. “No. All he did was kiss me goodnight.”
“Aw, my baby sister got her first kiss!” Toby fakes enthusiasm.
“I’m two months younger than you.” I roll my eyes.
“Are you going to have sex with him?”
“Toby! Oh my gosh, you are… inappropriate.”
“I know.” He grins mischievously.
“If it makes you feel any better, you will be the third person to know when it finally happens.”
“Third? I want to be first.”
“Well me and the guy I lose it with will be the first to know.” I give him a duh look.
“Right. And there’s still not a chance that it could be me that you lose it
to?”
“Definitely not.” I shake my head at him.
Toby pulls his car to the front of the country club, and one of the valets opens my door and helps me out.
“I will so never get used to this,” I tell Toby as we head inside. Today they didn’t ask for my I.D. Of course, they know me now. How could they not after the huge scene we made last time I was here.
“You will, and I bet it won’t even take that long. I don’t even notice it anymore.”
“How long have Dad and Veronica been married?” I ask him.
“They’ve been together since I was eleven,” he answers.
“So, was your family rich before? Or was this all new to you?”
“My dad was a big shot lawyer in Arizona. We were well off, but nothing like this,” Toby explains. “But my family was pretty dysfunctional before Mark Evers swooped in. My dad had a drinking problem and liked to use my mom and me as punching bags when he had too much to drink.”
I can’t help but notice that Toby refers to his dad in the past tense. I wonder what happened to him… Poor Toby. He had such a rough life. My heart hurts for him, but I’m glad he’s opening up to me. I want to ask him questions, but we reach the table before I have the opportunity.
“Kihanna.” Veronica smiles up at me. “You look absolutely lovely today.”
“Thanks.” I take a seat beside Gabe, and Toby sits across from me.
“I liked your other outfit better,” Gabe whispers in my ear.
I laugh out loud at his comment but stop when Veronica shoots me a dirty look. I lean over toward Gabe. “I figured after the incident at school on Thursday I would be pushing my luck if I didn’t dress like this. The wrath of Veronica is not to be underestimated.”
“You seem like the kind of girl who can hold her own.”
“Stop hitting on my sister,” Toby tells Gabe. “Besides, I think she’s already into somebody else.”
Gabe looks at me questioningly. “Who?”
“Ty Newman. But it was just one date,” I say, though I’m not sure why I feel like I have to explain myself to Gabriel. “We went to see this band. They were lame, but it was fun. Ty is a pretty cool guy.”
“Glad you had fun.” His tone of voice changed as he said it. It wasn’t his normal flirty-fun voice. He sounded uptight and proper. I hope I didn’t offend him. Maybe he doesn’t like Ty.
Memo to self: don’t bring up Ty around Gabe.
The rest of brunch feels very awkward. Toby and I joke around, but Gabe doesn’t relax. I wonder why the subject of Ty makes him so uptight. Maybe after I get to know him better, I will ask. Or maybe I will ask Ty.
Why do I feel like the more I get to know everybody, the less I actually know them?
1:47 PM
The pool boy.
I’ve been here over two weeks now and still haven’t used the pool. Today seemed like the perfect day for it. I put on a white and pink polka dot bathing suit and head toward the pool.
“You’re going swimming and you didn’t invite me?” I hear Toby ask as I walk through the foyer.
“You can swim with me if you want,” I offer.
“I better not. It’s really hard to remember that you’re my stepsister when you’re dressed like that.” He shakes his head. “You are way too hot for your own good.”
“Puh-lease,” I wave him off. “Everybody here is freaking gorgeous. I’m like Raggedy Ann next to these people.”
Toby snorts. “Whatever. You look like a freaking supermodel. Why do you think Jacqueline Hoff hates you so much?”
“She hates everybody, Toby. Not just me.”
“Yeah, but she hates you most. She’s jealous of you. Do you know how much plastic surgery she’s had? And still she is not half as good-looking as you.” Toby glances down, so I cover myself with a towel.
“Thank you, but I think you’re biased. Jacqueline is just a horrible bitch who is targeting me because I’m new. That’s it.” With that, I walk away, careful to keep myself covered.
I make my way to the pool and lay the towel in a pool chair. I stick my toe in the water to see how cool it is. In St. Louis, a pool in August would feel like a very warm bath, but Mountain View is a whopping seventy-five degrees today. I am surprised to feel that the pool is warm.
“You’re not supposed to feel of the water before you jump in.”
The voice makes me jump. I turn around to see a guy who looks about twenty standing there. He’s not wearing a shirt, and to say he has nice abs is an understatement. I try not to stare too long, but I’m pretty sure he has a six-pack. He’s tanned, so I can tell he’s spent a lot of time outside this summer.
“Who are you?” I question.
“Brian. I’m the pool boy,” he answers. “And you must be the daughter. Kihanna, right?”
I nod. I’m still trying to avoid looking at his perfectly chiseled body. Why can’t high school boys look like that? Damn he’s hot. And from the way he’s smiling at me, I think he knows what I’m thinking. He has a nice smile.
I look him in the eyes. He has beautiful, dark brown eyes — they’re the same color as his hair. He has messy, just got out of bed hair, but it works for him.
“The pool is heated. You can swim year-round,” he explains. It’s then that I realize I am still staring at him.
“Cool,” I say lamely, then jump in the pool. When I come out of the water, Brian is still standing there looking at me. “So, Brian, how often are you here?” Oh my God. My voice was flirty. What the heck? I feel my face grow warm. “I mean… I just don’t want to bother you…”
“You don’t bother me. I think things are going to be a lot more interesting here with you around.” He winks at me and walks off. My heart is beating fast, and I take a deep breath trying to calm down.
I’m going to have to swim more often.
Monday, August 30
12:32 PM
Girlfriend?
I didn’t hear from Ty at all on Sunday. I don’t know if that is normal, but I definitely wanted to talk to him after the intense kiss that we shared in his car. I’m hoping that I get another kiss like that.
“So, how was your date?” Courtney asks as she, Ariana, and Victoria sit down at the lunchroom table.
I can’t hide my smile for long. “It was amazing. More than amazing. It was… possibly one of the best nights of my life.”
“What did you do?”
“First we went to get food, and we talked, like a lot. I don’t know if that’s normal for a first date, but we really clicked. He’s so sweet. And then we went to a concert. The band was mediocre, but I had fun because I was with him. And then he took me home…” I take a drink of my water.
Ariana and Victoria go, “aw”.
“Then what? Did he kiss you?” Courtney pushes me for more info.
I’m afraid I won’t be able to answer without squealing, so I nod my head. “It was… awesome. I never wanted him to stop kissing me.” I touch my lips, thinking about the way his lips felt against mine. “I hope he kisses me again. He didn’t call me yesterday, so maybe he doesn’t like me.”
“He’s coming this way,” Ariana whispers to me.
I look over just in time to see him sit beside me.
“Hey, Beautiful,” he whispers to me, and then turns to everybody else at the table. “Hey, guys.”
“Hello, Ty,” Courtney says. “We… uh… forgot to get something to drink. We will be back.”
Arianna, Courtney, and Victoria all get up from the table quickly, leaving me alone with Ty… Great… Now they made it awkward.
“I had a lot of fun Saturday night.” Ty puts his arm around me, and I like it there.
“I did too.” I can’t stop smiling when I’m with Ty.
“I want to take you out again.”
“Okay,” I agree.
Ty looks a little nervous. “I know this may seem a little bit forward, and I know that it’s way too soon, but… What I’m trying to say is I don’t want you to d
ate anybody. Besides me, that is.”
“You want me to be your girlfriend?”
He nods his head.
Oh my gosh.
It is soon. Way too soon. And the rational side of my brain wants to tell him no for now. I should get to know him better. But the rational part of my brain isn’t winning. It’s the side that is controlled by my hormones. I like Ty. I enjoyed being with him. I like kissing him. And even though it is too soon, I kind of want to be his girlfriend.
“I would like that,” I finally say.
Once the words leave my mouth, I panic for half a second. I’ve never been in a relationship before. But it’s not like I’m promising him forever. I’m just promising him right now. I can deal with the right now.
Ty sighs with what seems like relief. “I thought you were going to turn me down there for a minute.
“Well, you’re right. It is too soon. But I like you.”
“I like you too.” He grabs my hand. “So, what are you doing after school?”
“I have janitorial duty. It’s day one of punishment for me,” I answer.
“Oh right. You punched Jacqueline. That was awesome,” he says. “How long does the punishment last?”
“I will finish my last shift at five on Friday.” I am wishing that I could fast-forward to Friday. This week is going to suck. I just hope they don’t expect Jacqueline and me to work together.
“Friday night, me and a bunch of other people are flying down to my dad’s beach house in Malibu. It’s basically going to be a weekend long party. It’s going to be awesome… Will you come?” Ty looks at me with his sexy eyes. I don’t think I could say no if I wanted to. Which I don’t.
“I will have to ask my dad. I’m not sure how he normally is with this kind of stuff.”
“Toby is coming.”
“Oh, then I’m sure he will let me come. I will ask him tonight,” I say.
Courtney, Ariana, and Victoria all come back to the table. I notice that none of them are carrying a drink. They sit down, and Ty stands up. “I have to get to class. I’ll see you later, Kihanna.”
