Texas Blonde

by Victoria Thompson

  Felicity noticed that Joshua was frowning when he reached up to help her down from the buggy. "Do you think something is wrong?" she asked, painfully aware that the idyll they had enjoyed all day had suddenly ended.

  He forced a smile. "Probably nothing serious. I just want to go see what Grady and the men are talking about," he said, reaching behind the buggy seat and pulling out their picnic basket. "Here, take this over to the house. I'll be along in a minute."

  Reluctantly, Felicity did as he bid, watching apprehensively as he strode over to the group by the corrals. She waited inside the house for a few minutes, until she heard him approaching the front porch. She recognized his voice and Grady's in conversation, but Grady's voice sounded odd, as if he were agitated about something.

  Unable to stand the suspense any longer, Felicity hurried to the door and threw it open. Josh stood at the bottom of the porch stairs with his back to her as he faced Grady. From the look on Grady's face, they weren't discussing the weather. She heard the name "Ortega," and her apprehension prickled into fear.

  "Ortega's men have never been this organized or this serious," Grady was protesting. "It seems like whoever is taking the cattle is trying to wipe you out."

  "But you said the men you chased were Mexicans," Josh insisted.

  "Yeah, and I think one of them might've even been Ortega, but the one who spotted us was a colored man. From the way they followed him, I think he might be the leader now. They picked up and ran like they knew where they were going, and then they disappeared into thin air. Ortega's men would've just headed on back across the border to wait for next year, but I'll bet my hat that these fellows will be back tomorrow."

  "I'm telling you, Josh, whoever is behind this knows what he's doing and isn't likely to be scared off." Grady looked like he had more to say, but he caught sight of Felicity standing in the doorway, and cleared his throat. "Evening, Mrs. Logan," he said, letting Josh know that they had an audience.

  Felicity smiled a greeting at Grady, but her eyes were on Joshua, who turned the moment Grady spoke her name. She watched in amazement as his worried frown vanished behind an appreciative smile. "Evening, Mrs. Logan," he mimicked, his gray eyes taking her in from head to foot and back again as if he hadn't spent the whole day with her and was starved for the sight of her. He started up the steps, pausing just a moment to tell Grady, "We'll talk about this after supper." Neither Josh nor Felicity even heard his reply.

  "Did you miss me?" Josh inquired roguishly, slipping an arm around her waist to guide her back into the house.

  "Terribly," she confessed with only a slight exaggeration, hoping her smile did not look as strained as it felt.

  "You can show me how much later," he whispered, making her blush and wiping all thoughts of Ortega temporarily from her mind.

  For the first few minutes of the evening meal, Felicity sat serenely at the end of the table opposite her husband, surrounded by the golden glow of contentment. Her marriage was working out even better than she could have hoped. In spite of the fact that Joshua had spent practically every waking moment with her for the past four days, he hadn't gotten bored. If anything, he seemed more eager for her than ever. And when they were alone, right after supper…

  Felicity's thoughts snagged on the phrase "after supper." That was when Joshua was going to talk to Grady about the rustlers. Her serenity shattered as she recalled Grady's insistence that these were no ordinary rustlers. What would this mean to Joshua… and to her?

  Sure enough, immediately after supper, Josh and Grady went off alone. Restless, Felicity pulled her shawl from its peg by the door and wandered out onto the porch. Wrapping the soft folds of the knitted shawl around her, she breathed in the scent of spring. Soon the bluebonnets would bloom and the grass would green up, an outward sign of the new life that had already begun for her. She really would get Joshua to take her out so she could photograph the ranch, and not just their picnic spot either. During the past few days, he had given her a complete tour of his land, and she had seen several other excellent possibilities for shots. And she would get Cody to help her make a wedding portrait. A traditional wedding portrait, she corrected mentally, smiling at the memory of Joshua's earlier suggestion on the subject. Cody would be thrilled to help, even if she and Joshua were respectably posed.

  Absorbed in her plans, she did not at first identify the strange noise that teased at the fringes of her consciousness, but after a few minutes, the odd sound drew her attention. Listening intently, she distinguished it from the sounds the men were making in the lamplight bunkhouse and the murmur of conversation drifting over from where Josh and Grady stood near the barn. It was a muffled keening, so muffled that Felicity had a difficult time locating it. When she did, she was stunned to discover it came from Candace, who sat huddled in the shadows at the end of the porch.

  "Candace, what is it? What's wrong?" she asked in alarm, kneeling in the dust beside her.

  Candace straightened immediately, using her good hand to scrub away the tears. "Nothing; I'm fine, miss," she said, although her voice was still husky from weeping. The white from her bandaged hand gleamed in the darkness, reminding Felicity of her accident.

  "Is it your hand? Is it hurting you? Maybe we should soak it so it doesn't get infected," Felicity suggested. She had been surprised to see the bandage on Candace's hand the day after the wedding. Candace had brushed aside Felicity's concern, though, explaining that she had carelessly cut her hand on broken glass and that it wasn't serious. Now Felicity wasn't so sure.

  "Yes, yes, it's my hand," Candace agreed too quickly. "You're right, I'll soak it." She began to rise, and Felicity helped her get to her feet.

  "What were you doing out here in the dark anyway?" Felicity asked, suddenly realizing how odd it was to find Candace not only weeping, but sitting on the ground to do it.

  "Acting like an old fool, I guess," Candace said, laughing unconvincingly.

  "I'll walk you back to your cabin and help you get some water boiling," Felicity offered, taking Candace's arm, but the other woman shook her head.

  "Don't be silly," she said with all the authority of Joshua Logan's mammy. "Besides, your husband's coming. He'll want to see you now," she added, gesturing to where Josh was walking toward the house, having left Grady at last. "You go on now," she said, patting the hand Felicity had placed on her arm.

  Reluctantly, Felicity began to turn from the black woman, but Candace suddenly grabbed her hand, restraining her for one last moment. "You tell Mr. Josh to be careful when he goes after those rustlers, you hear?" she whispered urgently.

  "Yes, yes, I will," Felicity replied as a shiver of fear danced up her spine. Before Felicity could say more, Candace slipped silently away into the darkness.

  "Who were you talking to?" Josh asked as he approached.

  "Candace," she replied, trying to banish the sound of fear from her voice.

  "Ahhh," he said, a smile in his voice. "And what plots were you making out here in the dark?"

  "We were just wondering what plots you and Grady were making out here in the dark," she replied, forcing herself to match his bantering tone.

  "Nothing very mysterious," he replied, slipping an arm around her shoulders and directing her toward the front steps. "That bandit Ortega is back stealing my cattle again, and we're going to go after him."

  "But Grady said…" she began, pausing when she realized she wasn't supposed to know what Grady had said.

  "Has Grady been talking to you about this?" Josh asked, his displeasure obvious.

  "Oh no," she assured him. "I just overheard what he was saying to you this afternoon about how he didn't think-"

  "Well, he's wrong," Josh interrupted as they mounted the porch steps. "Grady's worse than an old maid, always seeing trouble that isn't there. We'll just go out and chase them off, and that will be that. The worst part is that I'll have to leave you. I may be away for several days. I guess our honeymoon is officially over," he said with regret, but before Felic
ity could register the pain the thought of his leaving caused her, he added, "Will you miss me?"

  This was the second time today he had asked her that question, and this time he really looked as if the answer was important. "Of course," she said, feeling the anguish of separation already.

  "Then come in here and show me how much," he challenged with a provocative grin, drawing her toward their bedroom.

  "Mr. Logan!" she chided him, feeling the delicious tingle of anticipation quivering inside her. "It's too early to go to sleep."

  "Oh, we won't be going to sleep for a long, long time," he promised, shutting the bedroom door behind them.

  "Is it very dangerous?" Felicity asked the next morning, watching Joshua pull a change of clothing from a dresser drawer.

  He turned back to face her, an amused smile on his face. "Not very," he said, carrying the clothes over to where he had his bedroll spread out on the huge mahogany bed. "We chase Ortega every year. It's like a game. He tries to steal as many of my cattle as he can before we notice, and then we run him off back across the border."

  "Only this time you're going to try to catch him, aren't you?" she asked. Candace had told her about Ortega. In years past, things had been exactly the way Josh explained, but this year was different. Grady had once jokingly remarked that usually Josh lost more cattle to wolves than to the Mexican, but that was no longer true. This year Ortega- or someone-was stealing cattle in earnest.

  "I always try to catch Ortega," Joshua said, but Felicity knew his words were as much a lie as the unconcerned expression on his face. He was trying to protect her, to keep from frightening her, and that frightened her more than anything.

  Then she remembered Candace's request. "You'll be careful, won't you?" she asked, moving across the room to stand beside him. She hugged herself to keep from reaching out to him. If she did, she was afraid she would cling and start to cry and beg him not to go. She loved him so much that the thought of losing him was more than she could bear.

  He straightened from the task of packing his bedroll and turned toward her. "Of course I'll be careful," he said, lifting one long finger to touch the furrow between her brows. "Now, don't look so unhappy. You'll ruin that pretty face."

  Felicity consciously relaxed her frown, at least on the outside, taking some small comfort from his compliment. He was always complimenting her. He thought she was pretty. He thought she was beautiful. He liked the way she smelled and felt and tasted. Everything about her seemed to please him, especially when they were in bed together. And the quarrels had stopped, just as she had hoped.

  If only he would talk to her, really talk to her. When she had asked him last night to tell her what was really going on, he had laughed off her concerns and kissed her, making her forget all about her worries, at least for the moment. She should have been grateful that he seemed to like her so well, that he seemed so pleased with his choice of a bride. Instead she tortured herself by wondering how he really felt about her. He might like her, but he couldn't possibly love her, not the way she loved him, not if he was going to put himself in danger.

  With a small, anguished cry, she flung herself at him, no longer able to contain her emotions. Wrapping her arms around him in desperation, she bit down hard on hex lip to keep from weeping. Men hated it when women made an emotional scene. Her father had warned her of that. But even though she did not say them aloud, her mind screamed the words, "Don't go!"

  A little surprised, Josh hesitated only a moment before returning her embrace. As always, he marveled at how tiny she felt in his arms. Because of the enormous importance she had assumed in his life, he somehow expected her to have grown larger.

  He ran his hands up and down her back to smooth the tension from her body. She was soft and warm beneath his touch. In the five days since their marriage, she had never once initiated physical contact. He found the fact that she had now unbearably arousing. Wants and needs mingled until they were indistinguishable.

  "I have half a mind to tumble you before I leave, Lissy," he murmured into the silkiness of her hair.

  A familiar ache throbbed deep inside her in instant response. She smiled against his chest despite her terror, thankful that he still wanted her even though he was determined to leave her. To bait him, she pulled back slightly, puckering her smile into a disapproving frown. "You already did, right before breakfast," she reminded him.

  He glared at her in mock exasperation. "Well, now that I think about it, seems like I remember something of the kind. Or at least, my mind does. Other parts of me have forgotten completely," he teased.

  "Mr. Logan!" she goaded, using her last weapon.

  "I warned you about calling me that," he growled, sweeping aside his bedroll with one hand and yanking her down onto the bed with the other.

  A brief but blissful time later, they lay sated in the tangle of her petticoats. His head rested contentedly on her breast as she idly stroked the silver of his hair. "Joshua?" she whispered.

  "Hmmm?" he murmured, nuzzling the still-stiff peak of her breast through the thin calico of her dress.

  She tried to stop the words but they came out anyway, of their own volition. "I'm so afraid!"

  His head came up instantly, his expression worried. "Of what?" he asked, even though he had a pretty good idea he already knew the answer.

  Felicity swallowed, trying desperately not to cry. "I've lost everyone I ever… cared about," she began, not quite willing to use the word "love" yet. "First my mother and then my father and now…"

  "You're not going to lose me," he promised vehemently, rising up on his elbows to loom over her. "Not when I've only just found you." He pressed his mouth to hers, determined to stop this conversation. After a long, sweet time, he raised his lips from hers, satisfied that he had distracted her from her fears.

  Those emotions that he did not understand roiled inside of him, threatening to erupt in declarations he had no intention of making. He was certain it was only this intense physical desire he felt for her, along with his need to protect her, that reduced him to a sentimental idiot. His reactions were only natural. She was his wife, after all.

  He forced himself to grin down at her, and then he ran a hand playfully along her bare hip. "Good Lord, woman! If you don't leave me alone, I'll never get packed. Grady's liable to come looking for me if I don't get out there soon!"

  Josh rose reluctantly, knowing that this time he had to wipe out Ortega and his gang once and for all. The ranch that had always meant so much to him took on added importance when he thought of Felicity and the family she would give him. He must preserve his heritage for them. And when he thought of the bandits as a present danger to Felicity's safety, his blood ran cold. Even the usually unflappable Candace had cautioned him this morning about leaving a guard at the ranch to watch over his bride.

  Felicity let him go, but she noticed that his smile did not quite reach his eyes. Her answering smile was wan and couldn't erase the shadows from her own eyes, but she managed to help him reassemble his bedroll.

  She did not cry until he was out of sight.

  "Mr. Josh?" Candace called to him from the barn doorway.

  "Over here," he replied from where he was saddling his favorite horse, the Appaloosa he had ridden the day he first found Felicity.

  Candace paused at the entrance to the stall and watched him tighten the girth. She waited until he looked up. "Mr. Josh, you be careful now," she said.

  For a moment Josh had the disconcerting impression that she was actually wringing her hands in apprehension. But of course, Candace had never been apprehensive in her life. She was only rubbing the bandage on her cut hand. He frowned, wondering briefly if the injury was really more serious than she had claimed. How unlike her to be so careless with broken glass. And how unlike her to caution him to be careful, unless she was teasing. Except she wasn't teasing.

  "Candace," he chided her good-naturedly, "I've chased Ortega a dozen times. Are you afraid I'm getting careless in my old age?"
>
  But Candace did not smile at his banter, as he had expected her to. "There's somebody new with him this year. I heard you and Grady talking about him last night."

  "So that's why you were sneaking around in the shadows," he tried again.

  She still did not smile. "Grady said he's a colored man. You have to look out for him, Joshua," she warned, stepping closer so she could lower her voice.

  "Why? Who is he?" he asked, more disturbed by her uncharacteristically furtive manner than by her words.

  She hesitated, as if still undecided about what to tell him. "His name is Jeremiah, and he's… he's my son."

  "Your son?" Josh echoed incredulously. A thousand questions flooded his mind, but before he could voice any of them, she was speaking again.

  "Yes, my son. I had him years before I came here with your parents, back when I belonged to your grandfather. Jeremiah was three when I came here. They wouldn't let me bring him, so I left him with my mother. But he never forgave me for leaving him, and now he wants to take it out on you…" Her voice trailed off as she realized she was only confusing him with her explanations.

  "How do you know all this?" he asked after a moment of consideration.

  Candace lowered her eyes, unconsciously rubbing her bandaged hand again. "He came to see me the night you got married…"

  Suddenly everything fell into place. "Did he do that to your hand?" Josh demanded.

  "No! That was an accident," she assured him.

  "He was the man Hankins saw in town, wasn't he?" Josh continued, undaunted.

  Candace nodded, unwilling to trust her voice.

  That explained everything, why Hankins had said the man resembled Candace, why he had been asking about her, why he had not shown himself to anyone else… and why he had seemed so dangerous. "Did he threaten you?" Josh asked gently, instinctively placing a comforting hand on her shoulder.