The Wooden Nickel

by Alisha Paige

  “I’m not, mother.”

  “Good. You know I’m proud of both of you.”

  “I know, I know. You’ve said that a million times. Look, mom I’ve got to get going.”

  “Okay, sweetie,” Louise replied as she sat down at the kitchen table and unfolded the newspaper, staring at her handsome husband. My, they did have a remarkable love story and one with a very happy ending.

  “What are your plans for today?”

  “I thought I’d visit your father’s grave and take him these roses. You know how he loved white roses.”

  “I’m sure he’ll love them.”

  “Are you still up for dinner tonight?”

  “I’d like that very much, sweetheart.”

  “Okay, see you tonight. Bye.”

  “Bye, sweetie.”

  Louise hung up the phone and read the article from front to back, studying each photograph. It was almost as if she were reading someone else’s story and not her own. They had been through so much together, much of it filled with misery, but at least he had come back to them. She only wished she still had the wooden nickel and her lovely music box that Cliff had sent her from Germany. Oh, well, she had memories by the dozen and now a beautiful memento to keep forever. How thoughtful for Annalisa to honor his memory in such a way. She was very much like her father, always thinking of others.

  Louise decided to bake a cake and some cookies. The kids would be coming over tonight and she didn’t want to disappoint. As she folded the pecans and chocolate chips into the buttery mixture of flour, sugar and eggs, she found herself humming that old tune again. It simply just wouldn’t leave her mind and it made her happy that she had remembered it on today of all days. A light breeze fluttered the lace curtains at the kitchen sink and she craned her neck to see if she’d left the back door open and she had. Of course and that would explain the strong smell of roses that had filled the kitchen. Besides, she had half a dozen already clipped and sitting on the counter. She would look around for a nice vase before driving them over to the cemetery.

  Her visits to the graveyard were never sad or depressing. She only went when the weather was nice and Frank had built a pretty wooden bench for her to sit on. He had even taken a bird feeder out there and hung it on a low hanging branch. Cliff had always loved birds and it was such a nice gesture from his son-in-law. Funny thing was, most of the birds would fly off as soon as the old red headed woodpecker made his appearance. He was always there, without fail and Louise somehow understood. The woodpecker would fly first to the tree, then the feeder and nibble a bit, then he would sit on the back of the bench, right beside Louise, cocking his head from side to side as if he were paying his respects, too.

  A redheaded woodpecker used to frequent their backyard. Every year, that same woodpecker would show up, knocking his nose against the tree, forcing Cliff to go out there and shoo him away, and Cliff always said the same thing about the feathery creature.

  “That woodpecker has the prettiest head I’ve ever seen on a bird.” And Louise would always laugh.

  After Cliff died, the woodpecker was never seen again, until Louise saw him at the cemetery. One day, Louise drove by the graveyard in the dead of winter. It was much too cold to get out and the snow had begun blowing harder. She parked as close as she could and stared in the direction of his tombstone. It was easy to find with the bird feeder waving on the frozen branch. There he was, ole Red, sitting all alone on the wooden bench, all puffed up to keep warm. It looked as though he had a fluffy coat on and my he was a striking blood red against the white snow.

  Louise just sat there for the longest time watching him and then he flew down to the tombstone, landing precisely on the angel’s head. With slow little bird steps, he carefully turned around to look down at the words carved beneath him. Louise had no doubt that the bird could read, even upside down. Was Cliff’s red headed friend as sad as her? He had braved the snow and donned his best ruby coat to pay him a visit, even in the bitter cold. It was then that Louise decided to bring him special treats. One time she brought him bits of apple, dipped in peanut butter and sometimes she brought him freeze dried bananas. He had come to trust her and would eat out of her hand and now days, she went to the cemetery not only to visit Cliff, but their friend, the woodpecker, too.

  After taking the last batch of cookies out of the oven, Louise grabbed her coat and the vase of roses she had prepared for Cliff. She headed out the front door, back out into the dazzling sunshine. As she locked the door, she began humming that old familiar tune again. The smell of roses hung heavy in the air, mingling nicely with the frosty wind. The weather reminded her of the Valentine dance. That very night was a turning point in her life. Cliff had asked her to marry him before he left for Austria. Just like yesterday, she could still see his face and that sweet expression he wore when he’d asked her. Thank goodness, he’d finally asked, too. Both of them had been dying for one another. Cliff used to tell her back then that he thought he might just go mad with desire. He was forever comparing her to his favorite foods and Louise finally realized it was a compliment. He was very hungry for her and she couldn’t deny it. She needed him as much as he needed her. They were crazy in love back then.

  Sometimes when she thought back to their wedding night, she still asked herself how in the world she could have let him go. What if she could turn back the clock and make him stay? He would have never been taken prisoner and never had to suffer for years at Sachsenhausn, near to starving and freezing to death. Seven years shaved off of his life.

  And hers.

  Cliff had told her before how senseless it was to regret life decisions. What if he hadn’t gone to Sachsenhausen? He would have certainly been drafted and gone off to war and very likely killed in battle, like hundreds of boys from their very own hometown. Annalisa would have never known her father and Dianna would have never been born. It was useless to dwell on regrets. Yes, things could have been a lot different and far worse. When Cliff had said that, a shudder went through her and he’d gathered her in his arms.

  “I’m here now, darling. Let’s enjoy what time we have together.”

  And that was how it was between them, never looking back and always moving forward. They had promised one another to live that way and to cherish the time they shared between the two of them and so they did. They raised two incredible young women and had traveled the world together.

  It was October when Cliff left for heaven. It had been completely unexpected and as bad as it seemed, Louise as well as the girls were thankful for that. He had been in the back, pruning the rose bushes that he loved so much. Frank had come over with some firewood and found him beneath the roses, still holding his pruning shears. The doctors told Louise that he had suffered a fatal heart attack and was unlikely that he’d felt anything at all. Louise had taken Eric to a school Halloween carnival and came home to find both of her daughters and Frank sitting in the living room, just crying and holding one another.

  That had been the worst day of her life. Even when he was missing, nearly three thousand miles away, there was still hope. He was gone forever now and Louise never got the chance to say goodbye. Her girls were thankful that Frank had been the one to find him, but Louise couldn’t help but wonder if he would still be living today if she’d been home. Maybe she could have gotten him to a hospital in time, but then again, she kept hearing his voice call to her, saying to her, “No regrets.”

  Half of the town attended his funeral and the printing press had to be shut down for one day, because so many of the employees at the newspaper wanted to pay their respects. Louise wasn’t sure how she’d made it through the day. She figured that her girls had carried her through most of it. She barely remembered nodding at the hundreds of people that passed by, hugging her. She didn’t know when she’d heard so many funny stories about Cliff and some of them had surprised her. He had been quite a character and went to great lengths to take care of his employees at the newspaper. When Bill had died, he left t
he paper to Cliff, knowing it would be in the best of hands for years to come. Now it was Annalisa’s responsibility and she loved it.

  Never was a boss more loved than Cliff Emberton. The town raised money shortly after his death and erected a statue in his honor. It now stood in front of the newspaper. It was a younger version of Cliff, wearing a long trench coat, with a newspaper tucked underneath one arm and that dazzling smile that even the sculptor had managed to recreate. Louise loved to drive past it and nearly always winked. She felt a little odd driving away from it, almost as if she was leaving him behind. Cliff probably got a kick out of that she thought and Annalisa was as much of a nut as her father. Whenever Louise went to have lunch with her, she’d pat dear old dad on the back and blow him a kiss. The first time she’d done it, Louise was shocked and then both of them nearly fell to the sidewalk, overcome with hysterical laughter. Annalisa certainly had her father’s charming spirit.

  Louise parked her car at the cemetery and reached inside the glove box for the freeze dried bananas. Red was already waiting patiently for her, sitting on the tip of the angel’s wing. He cocked his head to the side when Louise slammed the door.

  “Hello, there, Red. How are you today?”

  The woodpecker took flight, flying just above her head, turning around to follow her back to the bench. Louise laid the vase of freshly cut roses on the grave and tossed some banana chips on the brown grass. The sunshine was warm on her neck as she took her seat across from Cliff. She unwrapped the scarf from around her neck and laid it on the bench. The wind blew softly in the tree and Louise smiled. The achingly sweet scent of roses rushed around her in the soft wind, as strong as it had been this morning in her bedroom, but now she was nearly convinced that she had only imagined dancing with Cliff. There was no other explanation and as much as she wanted to talk to her girls about it, she just couldn’t. They had worried so much about her and now they would really think she’d lost her marbles.

  Red pecked at the banana treats and then resumed his visit with Louise, sitting next to her right shoulder on the back of the bench. They stared at the grave together. Neither Annalisa nor Dianna had seen the woodpecker at their father’s grave. It was as if he waited for Louise only. Another thing she couldn’t discuss with her daughters. Louise had come to expect Red. He was a link to Cliff and somehow, this strange, ruby feathered being understood her pain and her longing. He could sit there for hours, just like she could, even in the driving snow.

  Louise’s thoughts were disturbed as a car came screeching around the corner. Red flew into the tree to watch. What in the world? Was that Dianna? She barely missed Louise’s car as she slammed her beat up pickup into park and hurtled out. She wore her hair in two long, brown doggie ears and hardly looked like a teacher at all, but Louise had to admit, she had the kooky quality of a college science professor. Dianna had mud up to her elbows as she ran up to her father’s gravesite.

  “Mama, mama!”

  Louise’s heart caught in her throat. “What is it? Is someone hurt?”

  “No, everyone’s fine. Annalisa told me you were here,” Dianna replied, wiping a stray hair out of her eyes, smearing mud across her cheek. Dianna pushed a mud covered something at her mother. The woodpecker peered at the two women, cocking his head to the side. He flew down to a nearer branch to get a better look.

  “What is it?” Louise asked as mud splattered on her clean white coat.

  “Open it!” Dianna blurted.

  Oh, my, Dianna didn’t understand that other people didn’t hold the same affection for rocks as she. What was it? Another petrified log? Last time, it was volcano glass that had gotten her so excited.

  “Open what? It’s a mass of mud. What is it, dear?”

  Dianna let out an exasperated sigh and began to smear some of the mud off of the top. Something glistened below. Cakes of mud fell to the ground as Dianna pried it open. Louise heard a faint tinkling and she gasped. Could it be?

  “Oh, Dianna!” Louise cried.

  “My greatest find ever!” Dianna beamed. “Look inside! Look inside!”

  “There you are,” Louise practically whispered as she picked up the tiny piece of blue satin.

  She took a deep breath and smiled at her youngest daughter. Dianna pushed her glasses up off of her nose and nodded for her mother to go on. Louise slowly unwrapped the timeless coin. The satin was untouched, just as shiny blue as when it she’d last seen it. There it was, the wooden nickel, lying in the palm of her hand. She ran her finger over the buffalo and a tear slid down her cheek. Red flew over and sat on her shoulder. Dianna giggled.

  “Who’s your friend?”

  Louise turned to look at him and he looked right back at her, as if to say, “Well, aren’t you going to introduce us?”

  “Oh, Red, this is my daughter, Dianna. She’s a geologist.”

  Dianna smiled, grinning that amazing grin that was hers and her father’s alone. “I bet Annalisa won’t think my job is just a hobby anymore.”

  “Where on earth did you find this?”

  “In the old creek. It was buried deep, too. I couldn’t believe it. I had twenty-four students digging in that creek and I was the one to find it. I just left them there, too. I told them I had to go see my mother. Happy Anniversary, Mom.”

  Louise hugged her daughter. Both of them were covered in mud. Red jumped from Louise’s shoulder to her head and just sat there.

  “Great bird, Mom.”

  “Yes, I’m rather fond of him.”

  Louise raised her hand to her head and Red hopped on top. “Shall we show Cliff what Dianna found?”

  The woodpecker bobbed his head. They walked to the grave site where Louise turned the music box over. She wiped the mud from the bottom and read the words now filled with mud, etched on a gold plating.

  To My Beautiful Wife, Louise

  I will love you, forever and a day!

  Love Your Husband, Cliff

  Nostalgia filled Louise as the old tune played in her head like a velvet dream. She found the tiny gold butterfly and wound it fully before opening the music box. The silver spindle began to turn ever so slowly, setting the silver spool in motion as the spike plucked away, tinkling the old German tune. Dianna put her arm around her mother and both of them cried, but more out of joy, than pain.

  “Happy Anniversary, Daddy,” Dianna whispered.

  Red flew to the top of the angel’s head and began to sing his little heart out, nearly in tune with the music box. It was pure loveliness and just as it should have been. As if Red had been waiting for his orchestra to begin. He puffed his chest out and cocked his smart head to the side, taking a big breath for such a small bird. Standing tall on his gray, reptilian feet, he whistled gaily, moving his head from side to side. A vain red coated opera singer, rarely heard, gracing those lucky enough to hear his haunting melody of love longing, lost and found.

  “I think he’s singing for Daddy.”

  “I think so, too,” Louise replied softly, leaning her head on her daughter’s shoulder. They sat on the bench together, holding the music box between them, listening to a concert years in the making.

  Eleven

  Tonight had been one for the memory albums and Frank had certainly taken enough photographs to fill some pages full. The kids had taken Louise to dinner at Cliff’s favorite steak house and everyone agreed that it wasn’t sad at all. Dad would have wanted them to celebrate their fiftieth anniversary. He had always spoken of no regrets and they had all done their best to honor the day as he would have wanted. Dianna’s new found treasure sat on the dining room table on a circle of lace. Louise had cleaned off all the mud with a toothbrush. She thought she’d never get the engraving clean, but finally after using all her elbow grease, it sparkled like new.

  The wooden nickel lay inside the box, propped on its side within the blue satin, just like it had never left. But wasn’t that how life with Cliff had been. He had come into her life, left her life and then come back overnight. And he had n
ever really left her had he? Both of them had hoped and prayed for the day when they would be together again. And Lily of all people had called Louise with the good news and now Dianna, their youngest had given her the most amazing anniversary present of all. She had given part of her memory back to her. Part of her life spent with Cliff was now at home again.

  Proof of love’s resilience.

  Louise found herself wandering past the dining room, just to take a peek.

  Sure enough.

  She hadn’t dreamed it or had a hallucination like this morning. The wooden nickel was still there. That old buffalo just took a side trip, in a music box, all the way to the creek on the back of a tornado.

  “Good to have you back,” Louise whispered. Then she returned to the living room to visit with the kids and hold her grandson and bask in their loveliness and know that she had had a hand in all of it. She was proud of her little family and today she decided would be filed under the shiniest gold, almost blinding in fact. Yes, gold seemed an appropriate color for such a grand day and of course-no wonder, it was their golden anniversary.

  “Let’s go put on a pot of coffee, shall we?” Louise stood and held her hand out to baby Eric. He smiled up at her and toddled all the way to the kitchen. She had baked Cliff’s favorite carrot cake in honor of his memory and it went best with a steaming mug of creamed coffee. Louise picked little Eric up and sat him on the counter while she scooped coffee into the filter basket. Eric exaggerated a sniff and Louise held out the coffee can to him. He was into smelling everything these days. He sniffed the coffee and smiled broadly.

  “Smells nice, huh?” Louise asked. “Looks like we have another coffee lover in our midst,” Louise called to the kids in the front room.

  Dianna strode into the kitchen, nabbing a chocolate chip cookie from the jar. “Wanta share with Aunt Dianna?” she asked, kissing Eric on the top of the head. Eric nodded and held a baby fat arm out, opening and closing his hand, asking for one.