Tarnished

by Rhiannon Held

  Silver released the girl and gave her half a breath to rub her wrist before she tilted her chin toward the starlit trees. “You need to lead us.” She realized she’d slipped a moment later. Her and Death, she’d meant, but perhaps the girl thought “us” meant her and Felicia. Felicia’s eyes didn’t search for someone else, in any case.

  Felicia bit her lip and started loping along the slight dip of a trail through the pines. Silver would have demanded greater speed, but this pace jarred her bad shoulder enough as it was. She set her teeth against the pain. No point getting to Dare a few minutes sooner if she was useless when she arrived.

  “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen,” Felicia burst out.

  Silver shushed Felicia and frowned ahead as far as she could when pine branches blocked one’s line of sight here and there. She couldn’t smell anything, but if they were upwind, they might still be close enough to their goal for sound to carry. She wanted these people to see her, but not with much time to think.

  “It’s a ways yet. I’ll warn you before we get too close,” Felicia muttered, bristling at the shushing.

  “I believe you didn’t mean it to.” Silver picked up the thread of the conversation and pressed her lips together to prevent a smile at the girl’s look of surprise. She’d expected a scolding, not sympathy, Silver bet. Well, Silver wasn’t done yet. “That doesn’t excuse you from doing something about it now, however.” She released the smile when Felicia’s surprise turned to sullenness. “Or did you think you would get to just stand back?”

  “I’m just fifteen,” Felicia told the ground.

  “You’re old enough for the Lady to have released your wild self. You bear the mark of Her trust. That’s old enough to make choices of your own.” Silver took a few running steps, gritting her teeth against the pain, to draw even with the girl and look at her in profile. Dark waves of her hair, dark fur of her wild self, against the stars and silhouettes of the horizon. Darkness and fire in her life, same as there had been in Silver’s, but that didn’t excuse her from running forward.

  “But how am I supposed to know who to believe?” Felicia kicked a rock savagely from their path. “Of course my father’s story casts him in the best light.”

  “So ask someone else.” Silver squinted ahead. When would they be able to see where Dare was being held? Would she be able to recognize it, or would it be one of the things from this world that slipped away from her?

  “No one else was there.” Felicia’s tone dripped with the scorn only the young could muster.

  “Not about what happened. Ask someone else whether your father lies. Ask a lot of people whether your father lies. So many that it’s impossible all of them could be trying to protect him. Then ask them if your alpha lies. Then, when you know who’s a liar and who isn’t, return to what they each said about what happened.”

  “Well, of course you think your mate’s not the liar!” Felicia took several running steps ahead and Silver let her keep the lead. It hurt too much to keep catching up.

  “Am I one of the people you’re going to ask, then?” Silver paused a moment, but didn’t make the girl say it. “My mate is an honorable man, or I would not be mated to him. But if you’re already trying to deny it without asking anyone, I think you must have some idea of what people will say.”

  “People say all kinds of things.” Felicia kicked another rock.

  “Watch what they do, then. Who do they support? People lie less often with their actions.”

  Felicia’s answer to that was stubborn silence. They stayed that way for several minutes until Felicia held up a hand for Silver to stop. She scented into the wind, and then picked her path based on the direction she found. Silver set her feet more carefully. Even though they were approaching from downwind, she couldn’t smell Dare yet. Getting closer, but not close enough.

  33

  Even when the three other Spaniards arrived with their whips, they inflicted pain no worse than anything Andrew had felt before. Bearable. It helped he knew their methods. You couldn’t really brace for this sort of thing, but it removed some of the fear. He watched the hallucination of Death laugh at him, and thought about Felicia. When she went back to Spain, what then? Someday she’d be an adult, and if he could find her location, his in-laws could no longer deny him the ability to contact her. But maybe she’d deny him that herself.

  Bearable became less so through repetition. Andrew’s world narrowed with each lash, graying at the edges. They couldn’t kill him. And the others would come looking eventually. Silver would know something was wrong, would bring them. Raul would have to slink home to Europe and take his imaginary fears of empires with him.

  Then, a pause. Andrew’s head cleared in a rush, giving him a breath of clarity between the end of his healing, and the start of the fog of exhaustion it created. Standard procedure, he recalled. Let the victim heal up before you started in again.

  Andrew had better take advantage of the time, then. He couldn’t return blows, but he had words, and he knew Arturo better than the other three. Knew where his buttons should be, if memory was any guide. “So what do you think, Arturo? Seeing your alpha use your niece this way?” The other Spaniards probably knew English too, but Andrew used it anyway for the illusion of privacy between the two of them.

  Arturo had been prowling at the sidelines while the others worked, and now he froze. “What way?”

  “As a bargaining chip. To save you all from whatever imaginary monster Raul believes in. You think he brought her to meet me after all this time for her sake?” Even though the words were true, it still was a wrench for Andrew to say them. That’s all this had been. An elaborate trap. He’d known it, he’d thought he could beat it, and he’d failed. “Allowing Raul to do that is the best you can take care of Isabel’s daughter?”

  Arturo charged forward. He slammed a kick into Andrew’s stomach that left him without air. He hardly had time to think, never mind draw another breath before Arturo was on him again. Dammit, he hadn’t meant to make the man snap. What if Arturo just kept going and killed him?

  The other Spaniards seemed to have come to the same realization. One tried to drag Arturo off and got a punch to the jaw for his trouble. Another came at Arturo from the other side. “Madrid said he was to live.”

  “But we’re running out of time. What does it matter if we kill him? Roanoke will still slowly fall apart under that weak alpha, whether he allies with us or not,” Arturo snarled.

  “You think killing me will make Felicia ever forget she had a North American father?” Andrew panted the words, but Arturo understood him. He growled and threw himself at Andrew, blows growing wilder. The harder he fought, the more the others restrained him. Andrew closed his eyes for a moment.

  If he taunted Arturo too much, he might break free and kill Andrew, but if Arturo had the chance to calm down, he might find an opportunity to do it anyway later when the others stopped watching him. Andrew didn’t see he had any choice but to try to push his brother-in-law so far the others locked him out of the building. “Everyone thinks better of the dead. Look at how you remember your sister. And are you sure you want to kill me so soon after I talked to Felicia about your lies? It looks pretty bad.”

  Arturo yanked forward in the others’ grip and snarled in Andrew’s face. “Should have killed you when she brought you home, disgusting North American mongrel.”

  “No daughter of Isabel’s is going to let you control her life any more than your sister did, I can tell you that.”

  This time, Arturo ripped a hand free and tried to snap Andrew’s neck. He didn’t have the angle or the grip, but he got a handful of hair and wrenched Andrew’s neck muscles to screaming. Andrew sobbed for his next breath.

  “A perilously thin path to walk, love,” Isabel’s voice said from Death’s mouth. “Are you sure of what he’ll do, sure that they’ll stop him? Really sure?”

  Andrew closed his eyes so he couldn’t see Death. No, he wasn’t sure. But what choice did
he have?

  “Stop.” Raul strode in. He didn’t even have to touch Arturo; he just looked at the man and he collapsed to hang in the other Spaniards’ holds. “He’s the berserker, not you. Don’t let him play you like that.”

  Raul banished them all to the other side of the room with a gesture. He stood considering Andrew. Andrew pushed himself straighter, the bruises from Arturo healing slowly, but healing. He wasn’t prey down and ready to be eaten yet.

  The longer Raul waited, the more Andrew’s abused stomach tried to twist itself into nausea. Raul had something good; he could read it in the man’s whole body.

  “It comes to this, Dare.” Raul smiled, smiled like Andrew had rarely seen him smile before. “I have your daughter. Perhaps you didn’t like my earlier deal, but we both know you’re kidding yourself. You’d do anything to keep her safe, and I have her.” Raul tightened his fingers into a fist, crushing.

  Andrew’s next inhalation sounded a lot like a sob, though he tried to smooth it out. No. No. He couldn’t let Raul control him this way, but Felicia—how could any parent not do anything they could for their child? Wasn’t that what the whole of civilization was built on? Protection of your kin, your mate, your people, your children. Most of all, your children.

  Hearing that sobbing breath, Raul’s smile grew smaller and more concentrated in its malice. “You will not be alpha. Understand?”

  Andrew looked around, trying to find something, anything, to focus on until his emotions eased enough to think straight. He stopped on Arturo’s face. His brother-in-law looked surprised. Taken aback by Raul’s threat—but not worried. Not angry, when Andrew had recent proof how fiercely protective he was of his niece. He didn’t believe Raul would hurt her, Andrew realized.

  But then Raul must have helped raise her. He’d clearly use her without a second thought. But perhaps he wouldn’t hurt her, according to his skewed definitions of hurt. “You won’t hurt her. She’s part of your pack.” Andrew hated the way his voice broke, but he couldn’t stop it.

  Raul released his fist, tapped the middle of that palm thoughtfully. Andrew saw tension ripple through his muscles. “All right. I’ll never understand why you always choose the hardest road, Dare.”

  He strode to a duffel full of equipment his pack members had brought, and drew out a knife. Over the stink of his blood and other weapons, Andrew didn’t realize its nature until the silver plating glinted just so in the light. “Even if you agreed now, you could always change your mind later. But no one will accept a cripple as an alpha. Think of it this way, at least you and your mate will match. What do you think? Hamstrings?”

  Raul crouched beside Andrew. He couldn’t stop himself from jerking away, dragging the piece of equipment a few inches. No, please. He’d been so worried about his back injury, this new threat slammed him into the ground. Not able to walk, forever, because cuts made with silver never healed.

  “Or maybe one eye.” Raul lifted the knife, tipped it in the direction of Andrew’s right, then left.

  Each breath came faster, but Andrew’s lungs were burning anyway. He jerked desperately against the chains. No. No. He searched the room for support, for a sign of help arriving, but found only the set faces of the Spaniards. If they thought their alpha was going too far, they didn’t make any move to stop him.

  “Silver kept going,” Death said softly in his usual male voice, just a drift of shadow in a corner. “You could too, if you needed to.”

  A beat later, and Andrew could no longer make out the line of a wolf in the shadow, but the words sank in regardless, removing the edge of unreasoning panic. He could. If he had to. It wouldn’t be easy, but he had a shining example to guide his way. Knowing that, now was the time to fight. Words once more.

  “All this, for a North American alphaship? Are you really that worried?” Andrew’s voice was breathy, but steady this time. There had to be something he could find to use against Raul, even if he had to repeatedly snap his teeth on empty air. “Or is it specifically me? Is this revenge, for Isabel? For her choosing me, instead of one of you?”

  Raul just smiled and switched his pointing knife back to the other eye. Nothing. Andrew wasn’t connecting. Dammit! “Felicia, then. More than just keeping me from the alphaship, you’re breaking down any hope of reconciliation. Why is it so important to you that I can’t touch her?”

  Raul’s lip curled. “When Isabel died, you’d have taken her home with you, wouldn’t you? Raised her human.” He spat the last word. “This whole continent—you interbreed, adopt their culture, call it civilization. Like it makes you better than those of us who keep traditions alive.”

  Andrew stared. Raul’s words had the resonance of years. Years he must have been watching Andrew after he arrived in Madrid, keeping it all locked away. Andrew couldn’t even imagine the kind of iron will that had allowed him to do it, or the energy it must have taken not to collapse in on himself from the constant bitterness.

  “Humans own this world. They design the game, they award the prizes. To turn your back on that is also to wither away in isolation. Hybrid vigor, Raul. No lineage ever survived through purity.” Andrew made the words crisp to hold his fear at bay. It didn’t really work.

  “Humans don’t fuck apes.” Raul strode away, his back to Andrew, like he needed time to pull his usual blankness back over his face. “They’re making you their dogs. Breeding you into toy poodles who would starve if set free in the wilderness.”

  “They breed pit pulls too. Abuse them until they only know how to attack, and have to be put down when discovered. Only humans don’t have to breed that into European packs, you’re doing it all on your own.” Andrew snarled at Raul, the sound calculated to show his disdain. “You preach avoiding humanity, but I don’t see you joining Alaska to run like a true wolf. You like your house: saves misery in the winter. Your car: lets you hold a bigger territory. Your phone: lets you control your pack. You’ll take what suits you from the humans.”

  “She’s mine, Dare.” The smoothness of the Spanish words after the choppiness of Andrew’s English syllables emphasized Raul’s soft point. Andrew must have scored some hit if Raul was retreating to that position. But did it really matter where he retreated, while he still held the silver knife?

  Death huffed from the side like he was exasperated with Andrew ignoring him to watch Raul. He came to stand before the man and sat tall on his haunches, instantly taking possession of the space. “When a child is grown, a parent lets them go,” Isabel’s voice said. “Parents’ lives are enriched by, not defined by, what their children do. Parents’ lives are defined by what they do. Leave your child’s actions for her own definition.”

  “She’s not grown,” Andrew whispered. Still a child yet, so very young.

  “You think as an adult you’ll have any more chance with her?” Raul sneered.

  Death shook his head, ears flattening dangerously. “She’s grown enough to have a life of her own. Live yours, Dare.”

  Someone rapped a knuckle against the door and Raul straightened, grip on the knife loosening. He set the knife on the side of the pickup’s bed, where Andrew could see it, but it wouldn’t be obvious to someone in the doorway. “Think about it,” he told Andrew, and went outside to confer with his guard.

  * * *

  Silver stopped with Felicia when the twisted scents of several Were finally resolved. Dare, Madrid and his beta, as well as three strangers. Two against five were much worse odds than she’d anticipated. Madrid stood with one of the strangers before the door, discussing something in low tones. Some diffuse hint of an intruder’s scent, she suspected. They’d pinpoint her location soon.

  “Can you—” Silver turned, voice low, to find Felicia gone. She’d melted off somewhere downwind. Silver didn’t have the luxury of time to follow her trail. Besides, if the girl wanted to disappear, she wasn’t an ally Silver wanted.

  “Did you really expect her to help?” Death asked, making an act of incredulity. “Be too busy wringing her
hands in indecision on the sidelines to help your enemies either, perhaps, but certainly no help to you.”

  Silver let the doubt twist around her stomach for a single moment as she stood in the darkness, staring at where Dare was being held. Had she really been trying to win Felicia over, or trying to make the girl feel guilty for what she’d done to Dare? She hadn’t thought about it, just prodded at the girl as Death did to her. But sometimes that was the wrong strategy. Had she let her frustration with the whining get in the way of what the girl actually needed to hear—or didn’t need to hear?

  When that single moment had passed, Silver gathered herself. It didn’t matter now. If she’d proved herself unable to lead quite as well as Dare did, she still had herself to rely on.

  “Madrid!” she called as she strode forward. The stranger with Madrid whistled for another the moment he spotted her. The first placed himself opposite her while the new one strode off into the trees, searching for her backup. If only she had it. Maybe he’d bump into Felicia and she’d distract him for a while whether she meant to or not.

  “Oh, it’s the mate.” Madrid took a few steps forward and narrowed his eyes, doing his own search for anyone else around her. “A better tracker than I’d expected.”

  Silver flashed him a slash of a smile, plenty of teeth. “My trail’s very easy to follow, however. The others will be along very soon.” The trick to bluffing was believing it yourself, Silver reminded herself. She’d do most anything for Dare, that was true. She just had to pretend to herself that doing this would do him any good. “I don’t want his daughter tangled up in this, for his sake. Take her and go, before the rest of the alphas get here.”

  “Please,” Madrid said. He gestured his underling aside and met Silver halfway as she forced herself to walk forward in a show of confidence. “If they knew what you were doing, they’d never have let you come alone. If you didn’t tell them, they’ll never follow you. Try again.”