"What happened to you?"
"Can we talk?" I ask, looking around to see that we've stirred up quite the crowd. "In private."
"Sure, come this way."
I follow him as we walk through the warehouse and over to a door in the back. It's not until we're inside that I realize it's the men's bathroom.
"Sorry, but there isn't really anywhere private here where we can talk. This is the best I can do."
"It's okay," I mumble, studying my brother’s features. He's a good looking guy. He definitely won the gene lottery between me and my brothers and he's always had his act together, even when he was starring in porn. I've admired that about him because I've always been the fuck-up. I let everyone down and a few years ago it almost cost me my family, but I cleaned up my act and until recently I was doing well. I don’t know how I'm going to tell Jared right now that I'm in trouble. He'll hate me, but he's the only option I have left.
"So what's going on? For a second there I thought maybe you'd gone back into your old ways. I mean, that was the last time I'd seen you in this kind of condition, but I know you better than that. You're not mixed up in that crap anymore."
"Yeah," I mumble in agreement.
What the fuck should I say now?
"So... a... listen. I got mugged today. No big deal but they stole my wallet and I had several grand in cash in there. They also got my cards, and it'll take a few weeks before everything gets situated with the credit card companies and I have access to my cards again. I need to pay my bills and I have some other expenses."
I'm the worst fucking brother on the planet lying to my brother like this, but I need the fucking money and he'll never give it to me if I tell him the truth.
"You need some money? No problem, I'll borrow you some. What do you need? Five? Ten grand?"
If only.
"No, man. I need a little bit more than that and I can't borrow it from you, so I was thinking maybe you could throw some roles my way? My face will be back to new in a few days and this way I'll be earning the money."
Jared looks at me dumbfounded and then slides the palm of his hand across his shaved head. "You want to do porn? Since when?"
"I don’t want to do porn, I need to do porn. It'll give me a little extra cash until I get back on my feet."
"And I told you I could borrow it to you. It's not worth it, man. What about Winnie?"
"What about her? We're just friends." Even as the words leave me my mouth I know they aren't entirely true. Winnie is more than just a friend to me and I know she'd be upset if she knew I started to fuck other women for money, but I have no choice. This is life or death.
"Friends my ass. Keep telling yourself that, Scott, and you're going to lose her. As far as the porn goes, the answer is no. It would take you a few weeks to earn enough money to pay your bills and whatever other expenses you need to cover until the credit card companies and bank figure everything out. It's not worth it. Just let me borrow you the money."
A few weeks, that can't be right.
"What do you mean a few weeks? You made millions of dollars a year doing porn, why would it take me a few weeks to earn a few grand? Plus, I need more than a few thousand."
"I made millions of dollars because I worked hard to make that kind of money. It wasn’t just handed to me or given to me overnight. I had to become something everyone wanted, and that took time. In the beginning I was only making a couple hundred dollars a scene. I could probably get away with giving you eight hundred a scene, but that's the max. You're just the dude. The women are the reason most men buy my films, and the women only get paid a grand in the beginning."
"What about that old woman, she was an actress or a reality star or something. She got two million for her movie."
"Yes, dumb shit. That's because people know who the fuck she is and would pay sixty bucks a pop to see her. No one knows who the fuck you are so you'd be lucky if anyone watched you for free."
Dammit. What the fuck am I going to do? I need a hundred grand and I need it now. I'm in so deep it's crazy. I should have stopped months ago when I was ahead, but I didn't. I took out a mortgage on the house, and then a second mortgage, depleted my savings accounts and investment accounts, thinking I would be putting it all back in no time. I just needed one good hand, but that hand never came. “Thanks anyway, but I'll figure something out."
"Can't I just borrow you the money? I don't see what the big deal is."
"No, I got this. Thanks, Jared."
I give him a brotherly hug and then walk out of the men's bathroom feeling lower than I did going in. I can't even close a shady porn deal standing next to a chrome urinal.
Chapter Fifteen
Winnie
I've watched the minutes tick by today. My nap at Autumn's only lasted an hour and then every other minute I was consumed with Scott. Autumn was right like she usually is. I need to talk to him. I was going to wait until tomorrow morning but I find myself on his front porch banging on his door at 10:59 pm on a Monday night.
I'm starting to see why some might say I'm crazy.
The porch light flicks on and then I can hear him unlocking the chain and deadbolt before opening the front door.
"Winnie!" he mumbles enthusiastically, and I instantly realize he's drunk. His eyes are bloodshot and he can barely stand up straight, but that's not the biggest shock about his appearance.
"What's going on, Scott?"
"Come in here, baby. I missed you today." He stumbles forward with his arms open and embraces me in a sloppy hug. This may be the first time I'm not in complete lust around him. He smells of sweat and alcohol, and holy shit, his face. What happened to his face?
I try to pull away from him but he just holds me tighter. "Come on inside, Winn. I almost thought you weren't going to show up and then I'd have to sleep alone."
"Scott, you told me I'd see you Friday. You were supposed to be alone tonight."
He looks confused but releases his hold on me and we walk inside his house. Well, I walk, and Scott... Scott barely makes it inside without tripping over his own feet. He's about to fall over onto the bare wooden floor so I wrap an arm around his torso to help him stand up straight. "Come on, Scott. Let's get you over to the couch."
The house is dark. The only lamp that's on is in the corner of the living room and the light only stretches out about ten feet. His place is a mess; looking nothing like the home I left just this morning. Drawers are open, paperwork is scattered all over the ground, and the back sliding glass door that leads to the deck has been busted, like someone broke in.
"Were you robbed, baby?"
"Nope. I can't blame this clusterfuck I call life on anyone else but me. I'm a screw-up, Winnie. Everyone knows it. But, hey," he pulls me over to him as he sits down on the couch. When I don't go to him willingly, he pulls again until I'm sitting on his lap. He's wearing a pair of board shorts and a green sleeveless shirt, which is covered in his dried blood. "You and I should spend every waking moment together during the next two weeks. It's all I'll probably have left."
His eyes look solemn as I take in his words. "What are you talking about? What do you mean all you have left?"
He ignores my questions and reaches one of his arms around me so he can grab the bottle of whiskey off the coffee table. It's then that I notice the empty beer bottles and open bottle of bourbon.
"How much have you drank, Scott?"
"Not enough," he replies, lowering the bottles to his lips and taking a big swig of the liquor. He doesn’t even flinch as the whiskey goes down his throat as he swallows.
I take the bottle from his hand and throw it across the room where it crashes against the wall. Alcohol and glass fly everywhere but I don't care. He's really scaring me. I maneuver myself so I'm straddling his waist and my hands move up to cup his cheeks, forcing him to make eye contact with me.
"Scott, you need to listen to me. Can you do that?" I can see the haze over his eyes and I know he is too far gone for me to be of any
help tonight, but I try anyway. "You need to tell me what's wrong!"
"And you need to get undressed. I prefer you naked," he slurs, attempting to lower the straps of my tank top.
"I'm serious, Scott. Focus. Now, tell me what happened."
His eyes close as I watch his head fall back onto the back of the couch. He's so quiet and lifeless. I almost think he's fallen asleep until he opens his eyes and looks over at me. Actually, it's like he's looking through me. It's the first time he's ever looked at me and not really seen me. It's like he doesn’t even know I'm here.
"I. Fucked. Up." He says each word slowly but it still comes out slurred. "I was doing so well, too, Winn. I hadn't gambled in three years, but I blew it. It was when I was with my beauty. Every fucking time I was with her in the beginning I somehow was around it. Sure, we didn't bet any real money at first, but that changed in Chicago. I gambled away a couple dimes with my beauty that weekend and that's when the itch started. I tried to ignore it, but I couldn't. When the itch starts back up I'm too weak and I scratch it."
What the hell is he talking about? Itching and scratching... It sounds like he has a nasty rash. And I'm beauty. Is he so drunk that he doesn't even realize he's talking to me?
"Come closer when I talk, Winn. I want to feel you."
I don't know how much closer I can possibly get. I'm straddling his cock for goodness sakes.
"Keep going, Scott. What happened today?"
"I got in over my head," he says, continuing to slur. "I mortgaged the house and maxed out my equity on the house, and now I'm about to lose it. My savings are gone, along with all my investments and no bank will give me a loan."
This is a lot more serious than I thought. He's always talking about how financially stable he is but now he's lost everything?
"Do you need a loan, baby? I've got a few grand saved up. You can have it."
"I don't need a few grand. I need one hundred grand. If I don't come up with it in ten days, I'm dead. Clipped. Swimming with the fishes. I'm being fitted for concrete shoes as we speak."
What the heck did this poor, lovable fool get himself into?
"There's got to be another way. What about Jared? He'll lend you the money."
His eyes shut again as he groans. "No, he won't. He bailed me out years ago and I owed more than I do now. He made me go to rehab and told me he'd cut me off if I ever got in this mess again. I hurt a lot of people back then, just like I'm hurting them now."
"Who are you hurting now, Scott? You're only hurting yourself and I can’t stand to watch this."
His eyes try to focus on mine. "You. I'm hurting you."
"We'll figure something out, baby. I promise. I won't let anything happen to you."
Scott's more relaxed now and I think I've finally gotten through to him. He places his head on my chest and closes his eyes and I let him, hoping the steadiness of my breathing and my beating heart will lull him to sleep. We sit like this for a long time and I stare at the broken glass door that leads out to his deck and the blackened night. It's so quiet I can hear the waves as they crash onto the shore.
It's calming.
"I thought I had a solution. Porn. Porn was my way out but I had no idea that I'd never make that kind of money," he mumbles into my chest.
"What's that? I don't understand." Porn was his way out. Why?
"I went and saw Jared today. I told him I was robbed and needed to make fast cash so he needed to put me in some pornos of his, but he told me I'd only make eight hundred a scene."
My heart breaks at his words. I can almost feel it rip in two. He went to Jared to shoot porn and didn't even ask me first. I know that there are no rules in this non-relationship we have going on, but ever since I moved out here things have felt different. We spend a lot of time together and we're in bed together every night. I know for a fact he isn't sleeping with Tawny anymore, so why didn't he ask me first to make sure I was okay with it? If he would have slept with some adult film stars would he have even told me?
I don’t know how many more signs I need to get it through my head. Scott's been very clear in the past, but I think this is what makes me finally realize that I will never be more to him than a friend that he gets to sleep with. If I were more to him he would have come to me first before making such a huge decision.
Tomorrow I'll help him figure a way out of this mess and once he's out of this debt I'm going to sit down and talk to him. He'll have to choose between starting a relationship with me, or losing the sexual benefits we've shared for over a year. My heart can't take a purely sexual relationship anymore.
Scott turns his head on my chest and kisses the top of my breasts. Even in his drunken state I can feel his cock start to stir beneath me.
"Hey, Winn?"
"Yeah, Scott?"
"Don't tell my beauty what I just told you. She'll leave me if you do."
Shaking my head in disbelief at how far gone he is I reply, "Your secret's safe with me, Scott."
He kisses my other breast and then mumbles against my flesh, "Thank you. Now let's get you naked."
"Hold on there, lover boy." I gently push him back onto the couch and he falls back easily. His eyes are hooded but not in lust. More like he's about to pass out. "I think you need a good night sleep, and if you're lucky I'll give you a little action in the morning."
His head falls downward and he looks at the bulge in his board shorts. "But I'm hard. I can't go to bed hard," he mumbles.
I'm not having sex with him right now. He needs to rest, but I also know it's pointless to argue with a drunk. I guess I can give him a little something. He's had so much to drink that he'll probably blow right away anyway.
"I'm not having sex with you, but if you promise to stay where you are I'll take care of your problem."
He grins like a giddy teenager but the smile quickly fades. He's so out of it that he can't even control his facial expressions.
I kneel down in front of him, dragging my hands up his thighs until I’ve reached the waistband of his board shorts. I start to pull them down and as I tap the side of his butt I yell, "Lift."
He tries but fails at lifting his butt and he's too heavy for me to lift on my own so I lower the shorts as far as I can and then release his hard cock. I don't even bother putting on a show for him since he won't remember any of this in the morning anyway. My lips part and I open wide before taking his cock inside me. I circle my tongue around him and then suck as I bob my head up and down.
I normally love giving head, but it's because it's empowering. Putting on a show to turn on a man is highly erotic, but right now I just want to get him off so he can go to bed and sleep off his buzz. This is one blowjob I'm giving because I love him and not because I'm turned on.
He'll have one hell of a hangover in the morning but I'll make sure to supply him with water, pain reliever, and greasy food. The perfect hangover cure.
After just a few seconds of my mouth on him I feel him harden inside me. I leave one of my hands on his thigh as my other hand comes up to fist the base of his cock, pumping him up and down at the same pace as my mouth.
"So fucking good," he groans and then I feel his dick twitch before his cum shoots down the back of my throat. I take all of him and swallow once he's finished releasing inside of me. His cock almost immediately goes flaccid, which is normally not the case for Scott but exactly what I hoped for tonight. I pull his board shorts back up, covering his package and then stand up to look at him.
He's fast asleep on the couch. He must have passed out the second he came.
Men.
"I love you, you foolish idiot. What are you going to do now?"
I let my mind wander over all of the revealing things I've learned this evening, but I quickly get overwhelmed and filled with anxiety and I know I need to stop worrying. There's nothing I can do tonight anyway. After a good night sleep I'll be thinking more clearly and can hopefully find a solution for him to get out of this.
Moving around the liv
ing room, I search his cabinets for cleaning supplies and then grab his broom from the pantry in the kitchen. I spend the next hour trying to clean up the mess that's all over his house. I'm even able to clean up the broken glass on the floor, but there's not much I can do about the sliding glass door. I'll have to call someone tomorrow to come fix it.
After locking his front door I move down the hallway and into the master bedroom that overlooks the beach. I'm too tired to change so I just lie down on top of the comforter so I can fall asleep. A moment later I feel the bed dip and I turn to face Sinatra.
"Come here, girl."
Sinatra lies down beside me and I fall asleep trying not to worry about Scott in the other room.
Chapter Sixteen
I'm so tired but something won't let me get more sleep. Even in my disoriented state I realize this. The furry body that is snuggled up beside me is licking me from the bottom of my cheek and up to my temple. Peeling open my eyes I'm greeted with a wide-awake Sinatra.
"Hey, girl," I whisper groggily. My hands rise above my head as I tighten my legs and point my toes, stretching before I crawl out of bed. I roll over and almost fall off the mattress, but I catch myself just in time and stand up. Suddenly, everything that happened last night comes flashing back and what started out as a bright morning is now bombarded with reality.
"Where's your daddy, Sinatra?"
Creeping out into the main room I spot Scott exactly where I left him. Passed out and sleeping on the couch. He looks so innocent right now. I almost don't want him to wake up because then he'll have to face the reality of his situation and that's going to suck.
I hear Sinatra's whimpering voice coming from where the sliding glass door used to be.
"Do you want to go out there, Sinatra? Come here, girl."
She trots over to me and follows me as I unlock and go out the front door. I know from my past experience with her that I don't need to put her on a leash. She stays pretty close to me when we're out on the beach. She's pretty tame for a Rottweiler and although people might be scared of her from afar, she's a big softy once you meet her.
Playing His Game (The Reynolds Brothers) Page 13
