The Last Load
Page 8
“Why? To go on assignments that last several years? Sorry, Randal, that’s just not what I want to do for a living!” He refused to discuss it further, despite Randal’s nagging insistence.
Claire quickly came to Doc’s rescue. “You folks might as well know…Doc and I are going to run my family’s company. With the advent of our ‘colonization connection,’ I thought we should build a new headquarters here on Mars. But Mister stick-in-the-mud insists it would be better to operate in the cloud. We’re going to wait until after the wedding to fight it out!” Louiston reached and took her hand, raising it to his lips and planting a gentle kiss there. She smiled grandly.
Susan squealed and hugged Claire in delight.
McNally cheered heartily and shook Doc’s hand while pounding him on the back. “I have the perfect gift! Build here and keep the Madeira office! The Company will supply the warp-doors! We’re partners, right?”
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THOCKMORTON TERRITORY
My friend! Welcome to Thockmorton Territory! You are a most welcome and special guest, make no mistake of that. So, while you are here, take a chair. Make yourself comfortable...take off your shoes...mi casa su casa! If you’d like a beer, there’s a few in the frig. They belong to Wife, but I’m sure she will not mind if one or two turn up missing. Isn’t English wonderful? “Turn up missing.” What a stupid cow...or is the phrase I’m looking for about a moronic ox?
First, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart.
What for, you ask?
For taking a chance and purchasing this ebook! You have no idea just how much that means to me...but of course I will try to find just the right words to thank you. For as we begin this new friendship, there is one thing you should know about me. I believe it is very important we start our exchange of ideas and emotions with one simple truth—I have never intended, nor do I ever plan to make a living as a writer.
No please, do not laugh! I am well aware that the Internet contains hundreds of personal websites with indie authors bragging about how much money they've made, or are making, or planning to make. I have no issue with this, nor will you ever see or hear me say an unkind word concerning any other writer. Those with the drive and passion (not to mention the sheer number of ideas) to write hundreds of short stories, or dozens of novels have my full respect. Even should their stories lack appeal (Why was the banana embarrassed? It lacked appeal! Get it? Har!) to a majority of readers. Many niche writers seem to do quite well!
Writing is hard work. Well, not all writing...I have over 35-years experience as a technical writer, and my work first appeared in print over 40-years ago. But I have always made my living doing other things; speculative writing, for me, has always been a hobby. For, like many, I enjoy having written much more than the actual writing itself. As John Irving once quipped, “I’m not much of a writer, but I'm a hell of a rewriter!”
My oldest hobby is, of course, reading. The first three books I ever read were Black Beauty, My Side of the Mountain and The Gammage Cup. But most dear to me when I was a small child were comic books. Some of my first memories were of sitting in my mother’s lap while she read me issues of Blackhawk, Wonder Woman, Batman, Superman, Hopalong Cassidy and Superboy. Oh, and Tarzan! Those old Jesse Marsh issues of Tarzan of the Apes are some of the most prized books in my collection! She even read me Jack Kirby’s Challengers of the Unknown when they first appeared in Showcase!
Please allow me to brag for a moment. A year or so ago, I was trolling Ebay for nice issues of Modern Comics when an absolutely beautiful copy of Modern Comics #67 caught my attention. If you’d like a moment to go find this issue on the web, be my guest. I recommend MyComicShop, Lonestar Comics’ site. It's the issue with Bart (isn’t that a nice name?) raising his left arm, and the hawk landing on said arm. The issue on Ebay had some significant spine-roll, but was still very nice. This was the cover (as I remember) that Jim Steranko used when mentioning Blackhawk in his History of Comics circa 1967 or ‘68.
I’m not going to tell you how much I paid for it, but it wasn’t really that much. When it arrived, I was so very careful not to drool on it. First, I opened the comic and pressed it flat in my paten press (time and heat are my secret). Then I carefully refolded it and pressed it two more times, flipping it after cooling from the first press. Next, off to PGX it went! You should have seen the size of the box they returned it in! And wrapped in about a twenty feet of bubble-wrap! Gotta love them!
When Wife and I opened the box, we were stunned...it came back with a 9.0! Wow! Now...here’s the brag: last time I checked, not only is it the highest graded issue of Modern Comics #67 in existence, but...but...it is the only copy of that issue ever professionally graded! Ha! Top that Donald Trump!
Enough bragging...let’s talk about “The Last Load.”
I can hear some of you screaming “But Bart (cool name, huh!) you ripped off both Ironman and “Stargate” (the television show)! Ironman, when McNally climbed into that one-man ship in the AGRI-compartment, and wasn’t there an episode of “Stargate” where they took an asteroid heading for Earth and warped it to the other side of our home world, thus preventing a collision?”
Nope...not even close! You see, I wrote “The Last Load” in 1992. End of argument! Besides, the way Tony Stark (in the movies) dons his suit is hardly the way Tony Stark (in the old comic books) donned his! A good example of the way Tony carried around his armor in his attaché case can be found in Tales of Suspense #81 (1966, I believe). His suit folded up as thin as toilet tissue and got sucked into all these little slits in the case! The armor didn't take on rigid properties until polarized by electrical current supplied by his torso unit! Which he had to wear because magnets in the chest plate kept a piece of shrapnel from working its way into his heart. Don’t take my word for it...go look for yourself! I have no idea about today's comics...really haven’t read many since...oh, say, 1994 or so. Jeez, we’re talking about comic books here! Think I'm mental or something?
But weren’t those old stories so cool? TOS #81 started the three or four issue story-arc where Ironman fought the Titanium Man right there in Washington, D.C. Even the art was kick-ass! Those were the issues where Gene Colon was using his real name, and not “Adam Austin.” But the Adam Austin issues of Ironman in TOS and the Submariner stories over in Tales to Astonish are some of my all-time favorites! And the Captain America stories in those issues of TOS were the ones with the Red Skull wielding the awesome cosmic cube! Where have we seen that combo recently?
Anyway, the Stargate stories utilized “hyperdrive” technology. Remember how they used to show the ships traveling through hyperspace? The warp-holes used in my story involve instantaneous travel between two points...not the same thing at all.
But I digress.
My writing has always been and will remain a form of catharsis...my feeble attempt at artistic expression. Sometimes, sentences, paragraphs and entire pages are a titanic struggle to say something, someway never before seen. Before I went into the Royal Navy, I painted. Never was much good at it, but it made me happy...it brought me joy.
I hope in some way this tale has brightened your day. I read in a blog recently where this young lady proclaimed her writing fit into the incredibly small niche she called “pleasant sci-fi.” She mentioned how dark science fiction had become. Dark and moody. I’ll have to take her word for it...the only sci-fi I've read in the last few years is the work of John Varley--a giant amongst giants.
My list of the five greatest books ever written in the English-language:
Moby Dick by Herman Melville
Weaveworld by Clive Barker
The World According to Garp by John Irving
Steel Beach by John Varley
The Golden Globe by John Varley
Oh, and Matt Smith is the best Doctor! Ever! “The Pandorica Opens” and “The Big Bang” are the best two-hours of television in the history of the boob tube! Yeah, baby!
I could ramble on for hours, but I’m goi
ng to save my aimless musing for my next work: a ten thousand-word short story entitled “Throwing Snowballs at Xanadu.” It should be up a few days after this. It is set approximately two, maybe three years after this yarn, and follows the adventures of Roy Hinderken and his wife, Betty.
Oh, before I forget, if you email me pointing out a typo, or something you consider a lapse in continuity, I’ll send you a coupon for a free story. Keep your eyes peeled, if you can stand the pain!
Last, but very far from least, I would like to thank the following folks:
Kristine Rusch—for the valuable reminder that there are indeed people smarter and more intelligent than me!
Joe Konrath—just for being! But stop cursing, it's immature!
Amanda Hocking—for showing all of us just how it’s done!
and the magnificent Passive Guy—a true lifesaver in a sea of turbulence and confusion!
And you, my new friend. Here’s hoping I’ve managed to entertained you for a short time, and that you will come to visit again! Soon!
My dogs call. Adieu!
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