Her Heart's Desire

by Lauren Wilder

  ‘Fantastic, I’ll look forward to that,’ she said softly.

  They began to walk back towards the house. Marisa felt a little confused and somewhat disappointed. For a moment there, she thought he was going to kiss her.

  Chapter Five

  Marisa soon developed a routine at Highcroft, and on Saturdays, straight after lunch, she liked to catch up with the world news on Sky before going to the kitchen to help Meryl bake her fabulous cakes. Sometimes the children helped, too, and Marisa loved that. They had quite a bond already.

  Upon entering the snug, she was surprised to see a young man she had never met before. He immediately jumped to his feet and offered her his hand to shake.

  ‘Hello there, I’m William, James’s younger and better-looking brother! You must be Marisa, the new PA!’ he enthused as he grasped her hand and shook it firmly.

  ‘Oh, hello. Yes, I’m Marisa, nice to meet you, William,’ she said.

  ‘I’m here for a few days. I try to pop up from London every few weeks. James says it’s time to show me the estate ropes, family duty and all that.’

  ‘Oh, right, well, he’s around somewhere. Shall I get him for you?’

  ‘No, that’s all right, thanks; he knows I’m here, no work today for me. I never work on weekends. I’m off to Marlow in a minute to meet some of the rugby lads.’

  ‘Right, sounds fun; do you mind if I check the news?’

  ‘Not at all.’ William handed her the remote control and sat down on the large, squishy sofa.

  Marisa sat down opposite him in an armchair and flicked on Sky News.

  She felt William looking at her, and she smiled. He seemed to be checking her out, and she felt flattered by his interest.

  ‘Hey, as you are new around here, I could take you up to London for a night out sometime. I know all the best places.’

  ‘Oh, thanks, that sounds great.’ Marisa smiled. What a lovely guy, how sweet, she thought.

  Marisa looked at him in his jeans and blazer, a pale pink shirt open at the neck, a younger version of his handsome brother. What an attractive family!

  ‘Okay, great, here’s my number. He handed her his card, and she slipped it into her pocket.

  ‘Just give me a shout when you fancy a trip to the big smoke.

  ‘I will, thanks, William.’

  ‘My pleasure. Well, I’d better head into town, see you later.’

  ‘Okay, see you later,’ Marisa said, smiling at him. He grinned at her before leaving, and she felt really happy suddenly. She put the TV off and headed towards the kitchen.

  * * * *

  James St. John sat at his desk. He was thinking about Marisa again, and he knew it was a slippery slope to disaster. Never mix business with pleasure; that was the golden rule. He was still wary after his involvement with Corinne and didn’t want to make the same mistake twice. He should never have started anything with his last PA. Corinne had turned out to be an absolute disaster. But he was so damned attracted to Marisa. She was so down-to-earth and kind, and she didn’t seem to care about money or material wealth. She was so different from his ex wife Clara and Corinne, from any other woman he had known.

  He thought about when they were up on the hill when she had sat so tantalisingly close to him. He’d had to fight a strong urge to grab her and kiss her deeply. He was glad he’d controlled himself. S he would probably have ran screaming for the hills then sued him to the hilt for sexual harassment. He wondered if he was being a fool. Was he imagining the attraction?

  Sighing, he closed down his computer and grabbed his jacket. He needed a distraction, and he knew where to find it.

  He bounded upstairs and looked into the nursery. He was surprised to find it empty.

  He made his way along the corridor to the living room. Seeing Mrs. Reed tidying the cushions, he called out to her.

  ‘Mrs. Reed, where are the children?’

  She looked up, her face brightening, she smiled at him. ‘Oh, good afternoon, sir, they are downstairs helping cook to ice a cake for tea’

  ‘Very good, Mrs. Reed.’

  He went down to the kitchen and was surprised to see Marisa there, too, Tom and Emily flanking her as she decorated the cake whilst they watched intently.

  ‘Can we lick the bowl, Marisa?’ inquired Tom eagerly.

  ‘Yes, of course, but only if you lick it clean.’ Marisa giggled.

  She handed him the bowl whilst Emily licked the spoon greedily.

  ‘Hey, you lot, what’s all this? No one told me we were making cakes.’

  James walked into the kitchen, grinning broadly. He loved seeing his children so happy.

  ‘Daddy,’ they chorused merrily, overwhelmed with excitement at the sight of him.

  They halted their feast and ran to him. He ruffled their hair and kissed them both on the cheeks, and they beamed with happiness.

  ‘Daddy, Marisa made a chocolate cake, and we made the icing, look.’

  Tom pointed at the big, sloppy chocolate cake dripping with icing, and Marisa giggled.

  ‘I hope that’s okay. I won’t let them have a piece until after dinner.’

  ‘Of course it’s okay, thanks for indulging them. I can see they have been enjoying themselves.’

  James went to the bowl and ran his finger around it, sucking it clean as he grinned at her.

  ‘Hmm, delicious. Well done, children, and well done, Marisa.’ He winked at her, and her tummy flipped over.

  * * * *

  Marisa loved playing with Tom and Emily when they were at Highcroft. She felt quite sad they only came every second weekend. She found them a joy and a welcome distraction from Mrs. Reed and the awful Marcus, who still prowled around her whenever they were alone in the house. She was sure he was spying on her. He gave her the creeps.

  At least she hadn’t caught him having sex again, and he hadn’t tried to get fresh again either, thank God. She was resolute that if he pulled a stunt like that again, she would tell James.

  Dinner that night was a quiet affair. Just herself, James, and the children. Felicity and Marcus were out, as was William. She watched James with the children, cutting up their food, encouraging them gently to eat their vegetables.

  ‘You’re so good with them,’ she said.

  ‘Oh, we have our moments, Marisa, don’t we, children?’

  They nodded, stuffing their little mouths full.

  ‘No, I love them terribly. I’m lucky; they are very well-behaved children really.’

  Tom and Emily grinned and looked at each other, then looked at Marisa, their little faces unsure.

  ‘Will you tuck us in and tell us a story, Marisa?’ they pleaded.

  ‘Oh, I think Marisa would like some peace and quiet after dinner, children,’ James said.

  ‘Oh, no, that’s all right; I’d love to tell them a story.’ Marisa felt a surge of joy. The children really liked her, but did he?

  ‘Very well, Marisa, that’s very kind of you. I’ll take them up now and get them ready for bed.’

  Mrs. Reed appeared on cue. ‘Are the children ready for bed, sir?’

  ‘That’s all right, Mrs. Reed. I will take them up myself, and Marisa has kindly agreed to tell them a goodnight story.’ Mrs. Reed’s face fell. ‘Right, I see, very well, sir, good night then,’ she replied frostily.

  ‘Good night, Mrs. Reed,’ James and the children chorused.

  Marisa went to say goodnight to Meryl and thank her for another lovely dinner. When she reached the children’s room, they were wide awake, patiently waiting for her.

  ‘Tell us a really long story, Marisa, please.’ Tom and Emily jumped out of their beds and, taking her hands, they both led her into the nursery.

  ‘Okay, okay, just get into bed, and I will.’

  She tucked them in, loving the happiness on their little faces. It made her heart melt.

  They giggled and snuggled down under their quilts, bright eyes watching her expectantly. She sat in the nursery chair facing their beds and told the
m Jack and the Beanstalk. As soon as she finished, they quickly demanded another.

  ‘All right, one more story then I have to go. You two should be sleeping, you’ll get me into trouble,’ she said, smiling warmly.

  * * * *

  James watched silently by the door as Marisa delighted them with the Cinderella story in an animated, hushed voice. He decided not to disturb them and retreated quietly.

  He was pleased the children obviously adored her, and she had only been at Highcroft a few weeks. It was quite something. They certainly hadn’t warmed to Corinne so well. In fact, they hadn’t taken to his ex at all.

  He thought of Corinne and how she had started out as his PA in London, eventually moving up to the house to work in the estate office after his divorce. Corinne was a go-getter, quite pushy and intimidating. She rather seduced him one night when he was feeling down about his divorce, and he’d drunk too much whisky.

  He hadn’t stood a chance; before he knew it, she was pushing him for a proposal. It was then he’d put the brakes on. He hadn’t long been divorced, and he simply wasn’t ready to get married again. If truth be told, he had seen Corinne as no more than an assistant with frills. After all, a man had needs.

  But how would he ever explain that to Marisa, without sounding like a total heel?

  He retired to the study and read for a while, half hoping Marisa would come down and join him. When she didn’t appear, he felt disappointed and confused. What was he playing at, what did he want?

  He knew the answer to that only too well as he closed his eyes and imagined seducing her. He remembered her at the interview, dressed so demurely in a smart navy suit that fit her in all the right places. She had worn a silk shirt that buttoned just at the cleavage, showing a tantalising hint of lightly tanned breast.

  He groaned, feeling his cock stiffen in his pants. He wanted her.

  Her immediate closeness to the children only confirmed what he had thought when he first met her. She was special, and he longed to know her, intimately. He sucked in his breath as he contemplated his predicament.

  He decided he would have to cancel the London trip. The Marchant meeting was in fact nothing that he couldn’t handle himself with the London staff to assist.

  In truth, his lustful cravings aside, he had been keen to show her the city. He was certain she had never been to London before, and he had wanted to see her excitement at her first glimpse of the Tower of London and Buckingham Palace.

  He had rather fancied following a bit of sightseeing up with a nice dinner at Pont De La Tour on the river. He felt sure she would have liked that very much. But it was a silly idea, he knew it was best to keep temptation out of the way. It was ludicrous to imagine she would accept a relationship with her boss, especially if she found out about Corinne. It looked really bad. Quite absurd, he had to admit. He decided it would be best for all if he avoided her until his interest slowed.

  * * * *

  Mrs. Reed closed the house up for the night, double-bolting the huge front door, putting out the yard lights. As she walked past the study, she saw the Lord sitting there alone and felt a pang in her heart. If only he would notice her, she could make him happy. She knew it.

  At least he had seen sense over that silly bitch Corinne. Mrs. Reed grinned as she remembered how easy it had been to persuade the silly girl to start talking marriage. The Lord had been appalled, of course!.

  Corinne had left in fury by the end of that week, just as they had the New York conference to deal with. At least she had managed to find Marisa quickly, and she knew by taking on an American girl she could be sure she wouldn’t stay around forever. Eventually, everyone wanted to go home.

  Mrs. Reed would bide her time until Lord St. John realized she was the one for him.

  * * * *

  Felicity combed her hair and eyed Marcus in the mirror. ‘Do you like her?’

  ‘Who?’ he answered without looking away from the TV.

  ‘Who indeed! You know very well who.’ She rubbed expensive face cream into her skin as she preened in the mirror.

  ‘Oh, you mean the Corinne replacement?’

  ‘Yes, Corinne’s replacement, dear, the pretty blonde to replace the pretty blonde. God, my brother certainly has a type.’

  ‘Hmm, this one’s got balls, though.’ Marcus pursed his lips at the memory of his earlier rejection.

  ‘What do you mean by that? I hope to God you haven’t been up to anything you shouldn’t have!’ she said, her voice shrill with alarm.

  ‘Of course not, my darling.’ Marcus moved from the bed to his wife’s neck like a panther. Kissing her gently, he stroked her shoulders and moved his hands slowly down to her breasts; the nipples were instantly hard through the thin fabric of her negligee.

  His touch made her quiver with desire. She so wanted a baby. Maybe tonight they would make one?

  Marcus led his wife to the bed and made love to her slowly. She wanted a kid, and he wanted her kept busy. His sole aim in life was to make things as easy as possible for himself.

  Later, as he collapsed on top of his wife, he mused what it would feel like to romp with the little American. He wondered if she would be as receptive. Rolling off Felicity, he lit a cigarette and inhaled deeply.

  ‘Oh, must you smoke in here Marcus? You know how I hate it,’ Felicity grumbled. He sighed and walked to the window. Opening the latch, he leaned out to blow smoke outside. ‘Thank you!’ Felicity called from the bed.

  Marcus grunted and finished his cigarette, then slammed the window shut. He sucked his breath in before turning to smile at her. The sooner she had a kid the better. He may even have to move to a separate bedroom to get some sleep at night once the baby came, now that could be useful.

  * * * *

  Marisa removed her fingers from her ears and listened. Silence at last! Oh, why did she have to be in the room directly above Marcus and Felicity? She didn’t think she could take much more of their hideous sex noises. Imagining Marcus screwing made Marisa’s skin crawl, she couldn’t get the image of him trying to kiss her out of her mind, and she still wondered who the blonde in the maze was.

  After a great night’s sleep in her new bed, she woke excited and happy. She was off to London, with James St. John!

  She showered quickly and dressed in her nice blue suit. She styled her hair in gentle waves, applying minimal but pretty makeup, a slick of lip gloss, mascara, and blush, and she was done. She slipped her feet into patent pumps and, checking her reflection in the full-length mirror, she decided she would do—smart and attractive, a nice balance.

  James was finishing breakfast as she entered.

  ‘Oh, I’m not late, am I?’ Marisa inquired as he approached.

  ‘No, not at all, in fact, there has been a change of plan. I shan’t be requiring you in London today after all,’ he said, turning his attention to the Times.

  ‘Oh.’ Marisa felt a huge pang of disappointment.

  ‘Still, plenty to do around here.’ He folded his paper, tucking it under his arm. He excused himself and left briskly.

  Marisa slumped into a chair and felt sorry for herself; she had been so excited to see London, with him. She wondered why the sudden change and why was he so distant today after their lovely walk in the forest on Friday?

  She worried if he was upset with her. Maybe he didn’t really like her being so friendly with the children. Had she overstepped a boundary? Or maybe Mrs. Reed had said something about interfering with the children’s routine. Had she been complaining to James? Now that wouldn’t surprise her at all.

  * * * *

  The weeks soon passed by and before she knew it, Marisa realized she had been at Highcroft for almost three months. James never seemed to spend much time in the office with her since the cancelled London trip, and she felt quite lonely. She looked forward to spending her free time sightseeing, getting out and about, and mingling with the tourists as she explored the surrounding area.

  She had visited Oxford, Henley, and Bat
h, all stunningly pretty English towns that took her breath away. She enjoyed taking lots of photos and couldn’t wait to create an album to show Melanie.

  She still longed to see London and felt sad she had never gone there with James. He had been very distant over the last few weeks. Any attraction he seemed to have had for her had vanished. He never spent time alone with her, and there had been no more near intimate moments.

  She was very disappointed but decided it was for the best. She would have been nuts to get involved with her boss.

  She enjoyed being at Highcroft though. She felt quite settled, and thoughts of Mike had nearly disappeared. The pain was no longer raw. The dreadful sickness in the pit of her stomach had passed almost as soon as she arrived at Highcroft.

  She knew her attraction to James had been a pleasant distraction, and it had stopped her obsessing over Mike. What was it Mae West said? To get over one man the best thing you can do is get under another. Well, she hadn’t managed that, but she had certainly thought about it enough!

  She felt a pang of sadness upon realizing she would never know what his kiss felt like or how his hands on her body would make her feel. She had fantasized about making love to him so many times, and now it would never happen. She resigned herself to the fact her crush was over, and it was good that nothing had happened between them. She concluded it must have all been in her head. She decided to take William up on his offer of a night out. She called him on his mobile, and they arranged to meet at Marylebone station on Friday evening. Marisa felt excited. She was going to see London at last!

  * * * *

  William was feeling very smug. He was very pleased to hear from Marisa. He had almost given up asking her out, so he was rather surprised when she had called. He started making mental plans. He would take her to some swanky west end wine bars, then on to Whiskey Mist for some dancing and hopefully a bit of a fumble if she was up for it.

  He hadn’t got any vibes from her, but maybe after a few glasses of champagne and his charming company, she would be a little more interested in getting to know him better.