One Christmas Eve
Page 8
“Did the lessons work?”
“Not…exactly. One day, after I’d been taking lessons for a few years he told me to make him a sandwich. I was fed up with him and said no. He took a swing at me, a lot like the guy did last night, only Billy was much bigger than I was. At that point, I guess I was thirteen, maybe five-two, a hundred pounds. He was seventeen, six feet tall, and built. Anyway, I dodged him and punched him in the nose with the flat of my palm. Gave him a bloody nose and a fat lip.”
“Awesome.”
“And then he tackled me and beat the snot out of me.”
Eli laughed louder than Blake had heard in years.
“After that, he made his own sandwiches, probably because Mom ripped into him for hurting me.”
“But you’re close now?”
“Oh, sure. That was just sibling stuff.”
Eli moved the eggs around his plate, keeping his eyes downcast. “I don’t know anything about that.”
“You will soon enough. But of course, it’ll be different, because you and the baby will be so far apart. I always wished we’d had another child.”
“Why didn’t you?”
“Your mom didn’t want to.”
“How come?”
Blake frowned at the memory of their arguments on the subject.
According to Amber, she was overwhelmed taking care of Eli and didn’t think she could handle a second.
Blake always thought she wasn’t willing to put on the weight again.
He thought of her now, pregnant at forty, and wondered if she was having a heart attack over it. He tried not to take pleasure in the thought, but if he was honest with himself, he couldn’t help smiling at the irony.
“I don’t know, exactly,” he said, scooping another bite of eggs. “But whatever her reasons, I couldn’t talk her out of them.”
“But that’s not why you got divorced.” Eli’s voice was confident, angry.
Blake’s hand froze in midair. “No. Do you know why we got divorced?”
“Because you had an affair.”
Blake dropped his fork. It landed on his plate with a clatter.
How could Amber have told their son that?
Hatred for his ex-wife filled him until his vision blurred with red. He squeezed his eyes shut and prayed desperately for help and wisdom and patience and the ability to be bigger than Amber. He felt the anger dissipate and opened his eyes.
Eli was staring at him.
“I didn’t realize she told you that.”
“She tells me everything.”
Obviously that wasn’t true, or Eli would hate his father less and his mother more.
“She was wrong,” Blake said. “She thought I had an affair, but I didn’t. This costar of mine wanted publicity, so she leaked a story to the press that she and I were having an affair.”
“Right. Sure she did.” Eli’s face twisted into an angry sneer.
“I can prove it.”
Eli raised his eyebrows. “Is that so?”
“Would you like me to show you?”
Blake wondered what his son was thinking. Blake knew too well that sometimes a well-worn lie was easier to wear than a new, uncomfortable truth. He prayed silently that Eli would at least be willing to hear.
“OK. Show me whatever proof you have.”
Blake pushed his chair away from the table. “Be right back.” He took the stairs two at a time, praying God would lead him right to the letter. He thought he knew where it was and prayed he was right.
On a short bookshelf in his bedroom, he searched for the thick family Bible. Since he’d become a Christian, he’d bought many bibles, but this one, inscribed with both his and Amber’s names as a wedding gift, remained untouched. Amber hadn’t wanted it and it seemed a fitting place to store the letter. A piece of truth nestled within the book of Truth.
He pulled out the Bible and flipped through it. There, pressed between the crisp pages of the Psalms, he found it. He carefully pulled out the paper, fearful somehow that his touch might disintegrate the worn sheet and destroy his only chance to reconcile with Eli. The letter wasn’t that old and the paper remained solid in his hand. He unfolded it, made certain it was what he was looking for and dashed back downstairs. He set the letter in front of Eli. “Read it.”
Eli unfolded it and read the words.
Blake didn’t need to look over his shoulder. It was a short letter and he’d memorized the message years before.
I read about your divorce. I’m so sorry. It was just a stupid publicity stunt to get my name in the tabloids. I never thought your wife would believe it. To tell you the truth, I never thought about your wife at all. Please forgive me.
Blake watched Eli read the letter. After a minute, he handed it across the table.
Blake returned it to its envelope and set it aside.
“We were friends. We were costars. We sat together at lunch with the rest of the cast, but someone released pictures of us together—the rest of the cast was cut out. She flirted with me, and I…I let her. She was beautiful and I was flattered. And someone took pictures of us laughing together. Once I was sent to her trailer to get her. We needed her on the set. I knocked, and she asked me to come in. I shouldn’t have, but…this was before the stories. I wasn’t on my guard. There’s a picture of me leaving, her in the background in a bathrobe.” Blake blew out a breath. “Stuff like that was my fault. I should have been more careful. But nothing ever happened between us, Eli. Nothing.”
“Did you show this to Mom?”
“As you saw from the letter, she sent it after we were divorced. I didn’t see the point.”
“You just let her think all that time that you’d been unfaithful?”
“I tried to convince her. I begged her to believe me. She didn’t. And by then…” By then, Blake didn’t want her back.
And Amber had decided to get revenge and had an affair of her own. And then she’d left him, sued for custody, and took their son across the country.
He wouldn’t tell Eli any of that. “It was too late. I want you to know that I fought for you. I tried to stop her from moving away, but she told the judge I was an addict.”
“Which you were.”
“No, I wasn’t. I hardly ever used drugs back then. I drank too much. But never once did I drink in your presence. I was never high when I was with you. But your mother convinced the judge and he gave her permission to move you as far away from me as she could possibly get.”
“Mom did what she had to do,” Eli said.
Blake nodded slowly, treaded carefully. “She did what she thought was right.”
Motivated by unwarranted jealousy, revenge and fierce hatred, Amber had destroyed their family and turned their son against him.
“You really didn’t have an affair?”
“Never.”
Eli nodded and resumed eating.
Blake was too uptight to eat another bite, so he pushed his plate away. “I want to ask you about last night.”
Eli picked up the last piece of bacon and tore it in half. “It was stupid. I know it was stupid and leaving Kelsey alone was dangerous. And all of it was just…” His voice trailed off.
“I’m glad you understand how dangerous it was,” Blake said. “And we’ll have to talk about your consequences. But right now, I want to talk to you about something else. When I gave those guys who drove the tow truck my card, it made you angry. Can you explain why?”
Eli tore the bacon, turning what had been a single piece into tiny crumbles. A few seconds passed, a minute.
Blake was determined to wait him out. After he’d counted to fifty, Eli sighed.
“Why are you here?”
“Why did I move here?”
“Yeah. And…and why did you follow me last night? And why do you keep asking me to come over? I don’t understand what you’re trying to do.”
Blake sent a quick prayer to God. This was the crux of it, the conversation he’d been waiting to have with Eli for
months. It needed to be perfect.
“I could tell you a lot of reasons. I’m here because I’m your father and I have a responsibility for you. I want to make up for all the stupid things I’ve done since your mom and I divorced. I want to be a part of your life.” Blake paused, allowing the words to sink in. “Eli, those are all good reasons, true reasons, but none of them is the real reason.” He prayed for strength. “The real reason I’m here is because I missed you so much. I love you and I want to be near you. And even if you never forgive me, I still want to be near you. Even when you scowl at me and hate me, I still want to be near you. I love you.”
Eli’s eyes filled. “I don’t believe you. I think you’re trying to clean up your image in Hollywood. Or maybe this is part of your twelve step program or something.”
Blake felt his eyes sting and allowed the tears to come. “I don’t blame you for not trusting me, Eli. There’s nothing about moving to New Hampshire that’s good for my career. In fact, my agent warned me against it, said I may never get another part if I moved away. I don’t care. My career means nothing compared to you. And as long as I live, I will never stop trying to convince you.”
Eli leaned back and crossed his arms.
Blake went on. “You don’t have to believe me today. Maybe that’s too much to ask. But could you just consider the possibility that I’m telling the truth? Ask me questions when you’re curious about something. Try to believe me when I answer. Your mother and I disagreed about a lot of things. She believed—truly believed—a lot of really bad things about me, things that weren’t true. Maybe you could let me tell my side of the story sometimes.”
“Why should I?”
“I’m not the same man I was.”
“Right. You’re a Christian now.”
Blake ignored the scoffing tone. “Yes, I’m a Christian now. A new man living for God. Maybe you could try to remember the good times we had before you moved and maybe you could try to get to know the man I am now. And maybe you can forgive me for all my sins. For the drugs and the drinking.”
“And the women?” Eli said, one eyebrow raised. “Your picture with every beautiful woman in Hollywood splashed across the tabloids.”
Blake uttered a humorless chuckle. “Maybe you could forgive me for embarrassing you. And maybe, just maybe, you could realize that just because you read the tabloids doesn’t mean you know anything about me.”
Eli blinked at the harsh tone. “Sorry.”
Blake finished his juice, gently set down the cup and softened his voice. “It’s Christmas Eve. God sent his Son into the world to bring redemption and forgiveness to the lost. Well, I was lost and He found me and saved me. And now I’m here with you, praying you’ll find what I’ve found, this amazing Savior who started out as a tiny baby, fully God and fully man, and lived so I could be free of my addictions and shortcomings and sins. He came so you could be free, too. And maybe, in your case, you can be free of the bitterness that’s keeping us apart.”
Eli turned to the window and swiped his eyes.
Blake continued. “Maybe…maybe we could just start over today, Christmas Eve. A fresh layer of snow on the ground, a fresh start to our relationship. Do you think we could do that?”
Eli stared out the window for a long time.
Blake watched his son, seeing the snow reflected in his eyes, and prayed for a miracle.
Finally, Eli turned back to him. “I’ll try.”
Fresh tears filled his eyes. “That’s all I can ask, son.”
****
After they’d both showered and cleaned up, Blake asked Eli to attend the Christmas Eve service with him.
Eli proved he’d been serious about his promise and agreed.
When they reached the small seaside church Blake scanned the crowd from the back of the sanctuary searching for Tallia.
She and Kelsey waved from the third row.
Eli turned to him, a huge smile on his face. “Did you know they were going to be here? Can we sit with them?”
Blake headed down the aisle. “That was the plan.”
They slipped in beside the ladies.
Eli scooted past both women to sit on Kelsey’s opposite side, holding her hand.
Blake decided to follow his son’s lead and pulled Tallia’s hand into his.
She leaned close to him and whispered, “He’s here.”
Blake smiled. “It’s more than I dared to hope.”
They stood with the congregation and joined the choir in Joy to the World.
Blake raised his hand in praise.
Eli and Tallia?
God couldn’t have given him a better Christmas gift.
Thank you for purchasing this Harbourlight title. For other inspirational stories, please visit our on-line bookstore at www.pelicanbookgroup.com.
For questions or more information, contact us at titleadmin@pelicanbookgroup.com.
Harbourlight Books
The Beacon in Christian Fiction™
an imprint of Pelican Ventures Book Group
www.pelicanbookgroup.com
May God’s glory shine through
this inspirational work of fiction.
AMDG