Touch Me

by Kayla C. Oliver

  “I know I shouldn’t have. I know I have no reason to,” he said and I felt my heart thud against my chest. He was only torturing me by seeing me again. Did he enjoy torturing me? Was this fun for him?

  “Can we just part amicably and call it a day?” I ventured to ask and our eyes met again. Rhett had his jaws clenched. Our gazes were locked and then abruptly he nodded his head. I felt my soul sink when I saw him agreeing. It just felt like something inside me was beginning to break, and I didn’t even know this guy!

  “That would be best for you,” he said and I flinched. Best for me? How dangerous did he think he was?

  “Heidi?” I heard a male voice behind me, a tone of surprise and I whipped around to find Jake standing behind us with bags of shopping in his hands.

  “Jake!” I said his name like I had never expected to say his name out loud again.

  “What are you doing here?” Jake asked, walking closer to me, his gaze swinging from me to Rhett standing behind me and back to me again.

  It felt like I was completely frozen at that moment. The earth was standing still and my worst nightmare had come true.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked him with a quivering voice.

  He looked well, surprisingly, because the only way I pictured Jake those days, he was miserable, scrawny and depressed. Or that was how I hoped he was. Instead, he looked happily tanned in a bright Hawaiian shirt and shorts that revealed his muscular calves. Holiday clothes.

  “Visiting granny. Seriously, Heidi, what are you doing here?” he asked again and I licked my lips nervously. I had been living a sheltered existence in the knowledge that I would never have to see him again. In my excitement about starting the business, keeping busy with the café…I had completely forgotten that there was always a chance that Jake would visit his grandma in Brunswick again and that we might bump into each other.

  “I live here now,” I said flatly and watched Jake’s brows cross with confusion.

  “I thought you left for Wisconsin when you left LA,” he said and I shook my head and tried to smile.

  “No, I came here,” I told him, but Jake looked confused still.

  “You left LA and moved to my granny’s town?” he asked, in a thin voice of disbelief. I was suddenly gripped with fear. What did he think I was up to? Did he think I moved here because I wanted to be close to him? To his family?

  “It isn’t like that. I found property here and I opened my own café. This has nothing to do with your grandma or you,” I tried to reason with him, but I could see that Jake had already formed his own opinions.

  “This is really creepy, Heidi. Why would you do something like this?” Jake asked again, ignoring the part about my café.

  “I wanted to open up a business. I liked Brunswick when I visited here with you,” I was pleading with him to understand…and having a déjà vu moment because this was exactly what my relationship with Jake had always been. Me pleading with him to understand me, to not be angry with me…

  “How many times have you visited granny already?” he asked, annoyance seeping into his voice now. He looked angry.

  “None. I’ve never visited her, Jake. This isn’t about her,” I said, with my voice tearing up.

  “Yeah right. I knew you would end up doing something like this,” he said and turned behind him to a woman who was standing there, a woman I hadn’t noticed before. His new fiancé, no doubt.

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about, but Heidi moved here for me,” I heard Rhett’s voice behind me and then his hand found my waist and he pulled me close to him. I’d forgotten he was even there.

  Jake’s expression changed and his brows narrowed in confusion as he drank in Rhett. He was having the same natural reaction that everyone had when they saw Rhett for the first time. I was no exception. Surprise that such perfect bone structure actually existed in human beings.

  “And who the Hell are you?” Jake asked, and I watched as Rhett stretched his hand out to the guy I used to date.

  “Rhett Larkin, Heidi’s boyfriend,” he said.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Rhett

  “You’re dating this guy?” the guy called Jake said. I could only presume that he was Heidi’s ex-boyfriend and I could see the disbelief in his eyes. This only made me more angry, and also because I couldn’t stand the way he was talking to her.

  Heidi said nothing, but I had sensed the stiffening of her muscles when I placed my hand on her.

  “Is there a problem?” I asked and Jake swung his head to look at me again. His eyes narrowed and I thought I saw an angry vein appear in the middle of his forehead.

  “You moved here because of him?” Jake asked Heidi again, in disbelief.

  “Yeah, she did,” I cut in, because I had a feeling that Heidi wouldn’t be able to respond. Jake looked at me again, and then turned to look at the skinny, blond woman who was standing behind him. His new girlfriend, I presumed.

  “You’re from Brunswick?” Jake asked, his voice relaxing a little.

  “Brooklyn originally, but Heidi and I moved here together. She has her café and I run a small shipping company,” I told him and Jake turned his pursed lips to Heidi again.

  “I had no idea you were dating someone else,” he told her and finally, Heidi found the will to face him.

  “Updating you on my relationship status wasn’t exactly my priority,” she said and Jake puckered his mouth.

  “No need to get catty about it, Heidi,” he said and I stepped in again.

  “You started it, man,” I said coolly and I felt Heidi reach for my hand and squeeze it. She was trying to communicate to me that she didn’t want me to get violent with him. And I had no intention to.

  “Sure, whatever, anyway, this is Carol,” Jake said and reached for the blond behind him. She stepped forward and smiled at me and then at Heidi. I could sense that Carol liked what she saw, because she kept gazing at me.

  “Hi, Carol,” Heidi said and extended a hand to her, which she shook. Jake just stood by, watching the two women curiously.

  “So you live in Brunswick now?” he asked again and Heidi turned to him.

  “Yes, with Rhett. Not with your grandma,” she said sarcastically, and I encouraged her with a friendly laugh. Carol laughed too, but Jake didn’t. He wasn’t finding any of this remotely funny.

  “I’m sorry Heidi…it’s just that when I saw you here, I expected the worse. You’d taken the breakup pretty badly,” he said, and I detected a sense of pride in his voice. Heidi’s muscles stiffened again and I tightened my grip on her waist.

  “Hey man, you did us a favor. You drove her straight into my arms and we’ve been happy since,” I said and looked down at Heidi lovingly, who looked up at me with helplessness in her eyes. I wanted to tell her that I’d do anything to see her smile again. My veins were coursing with a need to punch this guy in the face because he’d hurt her. Heidi didn’t have to say anything for me to know that she was in pain.

  Jake gave a small laugh and drew Carol into his arms, where she looked quite uncomfortable while still checking me out.

  “Well, I’m glad that we’re both happy,” he said and Heidi nodded her head.

  “Yes, and congratulations on your engagement. I hope you both have a wonderful, happy marriage,” she said and I smiled at the couple as well.

  “Thank you, Heidi,” Jake said and he gently pushed Carol’s back to direct her to leave. I kept my hand on Heidi’s waist and we watched as the two of them shuffled off in the other direction.

  I was just about to release her when Jake stopped in his tracks, turned and walked back hurriedly towards us.

  “And is this your café?” he asked and I could sense the color in Heidi’s cheeks rising. I didn’t have to look at her to know that.

  “Yes,” she replied timidly. Jake looked up at the sign and peered inside and then looked back at her again.

  “It looks lovely. You’ve done a good job. I wish you tremendous success. I’m sl
ogging away at Chef Dunphy’s kitchen and with no courage to quit my job. You’ve done something of your own, you’re your own boss.” Jake sounded genuinely happy for Heidi and I kept my hand on her waist, tightly there for support.

  “Thanks, Jake. I hope you can do something about it soon,” she said to him and he turned again and walked off.

  I didn’t let go of Heidi’s waist till Jake and Carol were safely out of view. When I did, she hurriedly stepped away from me and fixed an apologetic gaze on my face.

  “Thank you, for that…Rhett,” she said and I shrugged my shoulders.

  “Quick thinking,” I said with a laugh and tapped the side of my forehead. I could see that she was shaken up. She was trying to act as though none of that had affected her, but I could see it had.

  We were staring at each other in silence for several moments, and then I remembered the conversation we had just before Jake interrupted us. We were talking about parting ways. I’d told her that the best thing for her sake would be for us to part amicably, and avoid bumping into each other again. I was suddenly very sad. It was a weird sensation in my soul that I had never experienced before. It was usually very easy for me to say goodbye.

  Heidi licked her lips before speaking, and I was panicking about what she was going to say.

  “I feel like an ice cream. Do you want to get some ice cream?” she asked.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Heidi

  Mint and chocolate chip. That was Rhett’s flavor. He got two scoops in a chocolate cone and was now staring at his ice cream as he childishly licked the top. I’d picked Butterscotch with a caramel drizzle in a regular cone and we were walking side by side along the picturesque Brunswick harbor.

  The day was still sunny, and the air was salty as a cool breeze wafted through my hair and ruffled Rhett’s too. I wasn’t even an ice cream person. I didn’t know what had gotten into me to invite him for one. I suppose I just wanted to extend our time together just a little longer.

  “I hope you don’t believe what Jake claimed…that I moved to Brunswick to be closer to his grandma,” I said, keeping my eyes on the ice cream because I was too afraid of looking into his eyes. I was grateful to Rhett for having saved my face in front of Jake and his new fiancé.

  “It’s not my place to judge or form opinions on your personal choices,” he said in a serious voice. When I turned to look at him, I saw that there was some ice cream on the sides of his mouth.

  “But if I had to…I’d not think that. I’d think that you moved to Brunswick because you connected with the city and a prime property presented itself for your café,” he said and I looked away from him abruptly. What was with this knack he had of figuring me out? I felt like I was completely naked, an open book walking around in front of him to just read whenever he wanted to. Either that or Rhett was an extremely skilled judge of character.

  “Why did you move to Brunswick? You said earlier that you’re from Brooklyn,” I asked, trying to keep some distance in my voice because I didn’t want to admit that we were actually connecting.

  I heard him sigh, just as another gust of breeze slapped across our faces and ruffled his hair sideways.

  “Because of my business partners…who are also my best friends. Hunter is from Brunswick and he invited Owen and me to partner with him in his shipping company. It was too good an offer to pass up,” he said and looked out at the calm harbor waters, where the cute little yachts were anchored. In the distance, there were larger ships moored in the waters on which the logo of C Scape was painted. I had never noticed them before, but now that I knew they belonged to Rhett…or at least partly. I couldn’t help but wonder how proud he must be of his achievements.

  “Do you visit Brooklyn often?” I asked and Rhett looked at me. I had to crane my neck to look up at him and I squinted my eyes against the harsh sun.

  “No. My family’s moved here. I have nothing to go back to in Brooklyn,” he said, in a flat dead-pan voice that surprised me. It almost sounded like he hated Brooklyn, like he hated the memory of it. But I didn’t want to pry. After all, we weren’t even friends.

  “Listen, Rhett…I’m grateful for what you did back there,” I said, avoiding his eyes again and tucking stray curls behind my ears. I could sense that his eyes were on me again.

  “…but you want to remind me of the conversation we had before Jake interrupted us,” he said and I stopped in my tracks. Rhett stopped too and stood himself in front of me so that I had no choice but to look up at him.

  “I don’t want us to be mean to each other anymore. I know I have been…but if I’m being completely honest with you, I’m not willing to get into a casual, sexual relationship with you or anybody,” I told him, trying to keep my chin up. Rhett nodded his head, and then took one big lick of his melting ice cream. His blue eyes had turned into an icy cold stare again and those feelings of intimidation were creeping back into me although I couldn’t remember the last time I had felt this safe around anyone before.

  “I understand…and I’m sorry about that because I don’t do relationships. My last girlfriend was when I was fifteen years old or something,” he said and I had no choice but to force a laugh.

  “I wouldn’t even know where to begin and I don’t want to put you through something I’m not capable of doing,” he said and I gulped, then nodded my head. I was trying to put up a brave face but I could feel myself breaking down. I’d concentrated so long on trying to hate Rhett that I hadn’t acknowledged the fact that I had felt an actual connection with him. One I hadn’t felt with anyone in a long time. But he was the wrong guy for me, and he was admitting it himself.

  “No harm done,” I said and shrugged my shoulders.

  “It was fun,” he added and I nodded my head. We stared at each other for a few moments longer, and before I could stop myself, I lifted myself up on my toes, leaned in towards him and pressed my lips to his.

  The kiss was tender, long and made my heart break. We weren’t touching each other because we both had ice cream cones in our hands. It was only our lips that touched and sizzled and I pulled myself away from him.

  Without a word, I turned from him and walked hurriedly down the wooden planks of the jetty which we had walked over to. I wanted so desperately to turn around and look at him, but I held my guns and made sure that I didn’t. I knew that if I did, I wouldn’t be able to leave like that, not before one last time of being with him. Rhett was too amazing to have just once.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Rhett

  “So, let me get this straight…you’re saying that you’ve met somebody…like a girl who you want to keep seeing?” Hunter was sprawled on my couch, in his usual spot, cradling a bottle of beer in his hand. I was standing at the bar, pouring myself and Owen some whiskey in two crystal glasses. Owen was sitting on one of the chairs in front of Hunter.

  This was our usual Friday evening.

  “I didn’t say that. I said that I met someone who has piqued my curiosity,” I said, walking back towards the two of them. A big box of pizza was lying open between us, and half of it had disappeared already. Owen was the culprit.

  “What does that mean?” Owen asked, licking his fingers as I handed the glass of whiskey to him.

  “It means that she isn’t like the other girls I usually sleep with,” I said and settled myself down on the other end of the couch. Friday nights were reserved for catching up on each other’s lives…strictly no-business.

  “Is this why you’ve been so preoccupied lately? At work you barely even speak to us anymore,” Hunter said and reached for a slice of the pizza. I shook my head, because I was being honest. Even though Heidi had been a distraction and I was thinking about her constantly, she wasn’t the reason I was preoccupied at work. It was Massimo and his threat to completely ruin my life and what I had built here that was keeping me up at night. And I still didn’t want Hunter or Owen to find out about it.

  “Then what is it? What’s been going on with you?” Hunter ask
ed and when I looked up, I found that my two friends were glaring at me. Looking for some real answers. I was beginning to toy with the idea of spilling the beans on Massimo. They would only want to support me. I trusted them with my life…but I was still ashamed of my past. I was yet to come to terms with it.

  “Nothing. Nothing’s been going on. I’ve just been busy trying to broker the deal with Wilentz,” I said and took a large sip of my whiskey. I caught Owen and Hunter exchanging looks and then Owen leaned forward towards me, his elbows clamped down on his knees.

  “Look man, it happens to the best of us,” he said and I knotted my brows at him.

  “What are you talking about?” I asked, and Owen threw Hunter a nervous look again.

  “Falling in love…or whatever you want to call that,” he said and broke eye contact with me to drink from his glass. This was not exactly the kind of conversation we usually had. It was making us all very uncomfortable.

  “Love? Have you two lost your mind?” I said with a forced laugh and Hunter interrupted me this time.

  “We’ve both noticed that you’re acting different lately, and now you’re telling us that you’ve met someone…don’t you even want to entertain the possibility that this relationship could be something more than just sex?” Hunter said and I was shaking my head, still laughing.

  “What relationship? I’ve met her like three times. Slept with her once. There is no relationship and this love thing that you’re talking about is complete bullshit,” I said irritably and stood up from the couch and walked back to the bar.

  Owen and Hunter were both quiet behind me, but I could hear their brains rolling. They thought they were holding some kind of intervention for me! I clenched my jaw as I poured myself some more whiskey and walked back to them. Now I was even more tempted to just tell them about Massimo, just to get them off my back about Heidi.