Love & Lies

by Kimberla Lawson Roby

  “Antonio, please don’t contact me again,” I said, and he laughed loudly.

  “Baby, this is just the beginning. You and me, we’re just gettin’ started.”

  He slammed the phone down and I pulled out my phone book to call a locksmith. I knew I would have to pay after-hour fees, but it would certainly be worth it. I scanned the yellow pages and felt some sense of comfort when I saw a listing for Wilson Lock & Key Specialists. Carl Wilson was the owner and a member of our church, so at least I knew him and his wife on a personal basis. I hadn’t seen them in a while, but still, I felt better than I would have calling a stranger.

  It only took him thirty minutes to arrive, and in the meantime I’d already changed the password on my security system. Carl parked in the driveway, and since I was looking out for him, I opened the door before he was able to ring the bell or knock.

  “I’m sorry to have called you so late, but I really needed my locks changed as soon as possible.”

  “It’s no problem at all and I appreciate your business,” he said, stepping inside and closing the door.

  “I won’t go into details, but I had someone living with me, and now that he’s out, he’s threatening me.”

  “Have you contacted the police?”

  “Yes. As a matter of fact, they arrested him a few hours ago.”

  “Oh.”

  “It’s a long story.”

  “I understand,” he said, checking the doorknob. “Does your back door have the same type of lock?”

  “Yes.”

  “Well, we should be able to get these switched out in no time.”

  “Good. Can I get you something to drink? Water? Juice?”

  “No, I’m fine. I’ll just head back out to my truck to get the locks and then get this taken care of for you.”

  When he left, I couldn’t help thinking how attractive he was. But at the same time, he was very married and totally off limits—off limits because the one thing I was dead set against was committing adultery. I was guilty of fornication, something I clearly wasn’t proud of, but I would never take up with another woman’s husband. Not for any reason.

  After Carl finished both jobs, he handed me the new keys and wrote up an invoice.

  “Is this all?” I said, scanning the bill.

  “You wanna pay more?” he asked, smiling.

  “No, but it is after ten o’clock.”

  “I waived the after-hours charge.”

  “Well, thanks. That helps a lot, and again I appreciate you coming to do this for me.”

  “Are you going to be okay?”

  “I think so.”

  “Well, you have my number, so please don’t hesitate to call if you need to.”

  “I will and please tell Greta I said hello and that I’m sorry for keeping you out so late.”

  “To tell you the truth, I don’t think she would care one way or the other. Our divorce was final six months ago.”

  “Oh, Carl, I’m really sorry. I didn’t know.”

  “Not a lot of people do because we haven’t been to church in almost a year. It was painful at first, but our decision to split was mutual.”

  “Well, again, I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be, and like I said, please call if you need to.”

  “You take care of yourself.”

  “You, too,” he said, smiling, and I stood in the doorway until he drove down the street.

  I stood there wondering why I couldn’t have met someone like Carl when I’d first moved to Mitchell. More so, I wondered why Greta had made the decision to give him up. Especially when a good man was so hard to find.

  Chapter 16

  CHARLOTTE

  “Ms. Charlotte,” Tracy called up the stairs to me.

  “Yes?”

  “Marissa’s principal is on the line for you.”

  “Thanks,” I said, picking up the phone in my bedroom. “Hello?”

  “Mrs. Black?” Ms. Keller said.

  “Yes. How are you?”

  “Well, unfortunately, I’ve had better days, and I’m sorry to tell you that we have a real problem here.”

  “Is Marissa okay?”

  “She’s fine, but one of the other students caught her in the girls’ bathroom striking matches and waving them around and then dropping them in the toilet.”

  “Dear God. When?”

  “Not long ago. Marissa was in one of the stalls and the young lady who went to report it to her teacher heard her striking matches, and when she pushed open the door, Marissa just looked at her and struck another one.”

  “Ms. Keller, I am so sorry that this has happened.”

  “I’m sorry, too, and I’m going to have to ask you to come pick her up. We don’t have any choice except to suspend her for the rest of the week, and I’m going to have to suggest that you and your husband take her somewhere for professional counseling.”

  “I agree.”

  “She’ll be waiting here in my office until you arrive.”

  “Thanks so much, and I should be there in about a half hour.”

  I grabbed my purse and headed down to the main floor and told Tracy that I had to drive over to the school to get Marissa. I didn’t go into details, but I would definitely confide the situation to her when I returned because now Marissa needed to be watched at all times. This whole obsession with fire—I couldn’t erase the flashbacks that were now taking control of my mind, flashbacks of our house burning down to the ground. I could still see Aaron being dragged away from the scene and being driven off in a police car. Now, though, in the present, I had to worry about my own daughter doing the same thing, and I didn’t know what to do about it. Yes, there was counseling, but what if it didn’t help her? What if she truly was a bad seed and was destined to commit crimes?

  I rushed out of the house, into the car, and drove out of the subdivision. I needed to talk to someone, and while I knew it should have been Curtis, I dialed my mother instead.

  “Mom?” I said when she answered.

  “Hi, sweetheart. How are you?”

  “Not good,” I said with tears rolling down my cheeks.

  “Why? What’s wrong?”

  “It’s Marissa.”

  “Is she okay?”

  “No. I mean, nothing’s happened to her, but the principal just called to say that she was playing with matches in the bathroom at school and she’s been suspended.”

  “Where did she get matches from?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Has she done anything like this before?”

  “Yes. I didn’t tell you or Curtis or anyone, but a couple of weeks ago, I came into the kitchen and caught her playing with the burners on the stove. She was waving her hand through the fire like she was enjoying it.”

  “Oh no. Did you ask her why?”

  “No, because once I got her attention, she turned everything off and went up to her bedroom. She never even acknowledged what she was doing.”

  “Sweetheart, you have got to get that child some help. Playing with fire is not only dangerous, it’s not normal.”

  “Mom, I’m so afraid to tell Curtis because…” I tried to finish my sentence but when I couldn’t, I pulled over to the side of the road and cried openly.

  “Honey, it’ll be okay. Children have problems all the time and that’s what doctors and counselors are here for.”

  “Mom, there’s something I’ve never told you.”

  “What?”

  “I think Marissa might be Aaron’s daughter.”

  “But you and Curtis had a paternity test done before she was even born.”

  “I know, but remember when I worked as a paralegal at the law firm and I met that really nice rich lady, Meredith Connolly Christiansen?”

  “Yes, you talked about her all the time.”

  “Well, when Curtis found out I was pregnant, I panicked. I knew Curtis would leave me if Aaron had ended up being the father, and I just couldn’t take a chance on him doing that. So…I h
ad Meredith find and pay a doctor to administer the test and give us the results Curtis needed to see.”

  “Oh, Charlotte.”

  “I know. I’ve done an unforgivable thing, and the lab tech is the only person who really knows what the truth is because I made sure he didn’t tell me one way or the other either. I thought it would better that way.”

  “Well, you’ve got to tell Curtis about what Marissa just did at school, and then you’re going to have to tell him about that paternity test. Because if he finds out on his own, he’ll never forgive you.”

  “But Mom, I can’t. I mean, I am going to tell him about the matches and the stove incident, but I just can’t tell him about that paternity test.”

  “I can’t force you to do anything you don’t want to, but sweetheart, I’m advising you to tell Curtis before it’s too late. Tell him so that he won’t have to learn from someone else that yet another child might not be his. He almost left you after he found out Matthew didn’t belong to him, so maybe if you go ahead and tell him the truth about Marissa, he’ll take it a lot better.”

  “No he won’t. He’ll file for a divorce and he’ll use all of this against me in court. He’ll do everything he can to make sure I don’t get a dime from him, and he won’t think twice about taking the children away from me. He won’t even care that they’re not biologically his. He’ll try to take them because he’ll say I don’t deserve them.”

  “What’s goin’ on?” I heard my father say in the background. “And who is that on the phone?”

  “Mom, please don’t tell Daddy. Please. I’m begging you.”

  “Honey, it’s just Charlotte,” she told my father. “She just called to see how we were doing.”

  “Then why are you sitting there looking all worried about something?” he asked her.

  “I’m not. I guess I’m just tired.”

  “Uh-huh,” he said, clearly not believing a word she said.

  “Is he gone?” I asked.

  “Yes, but you need to handle this because I won’t be able to keep this from your father forever. I’ve lied to him enough over the years, and that’s why I’m trying to prevent you from continuing to do the same thing with Curtis.”

  “I’ll call you later, Mom,” I said, pulling back onto the road. “I’m on my way to pick up Marissa now.”

  “You be careful and call me if you need me.”

  “I will, and thanks, Mom, for listening.”

  As soon as I walked inside the school and down the main corridor, I entered the administration office and who did I see? My daughter sitting in a chair, swinging her legs back and forth like she was the happiest person in the world and was innocent of all charges.

  “Hi, Mommy,” she said when she saw me, and the bubbly expression on her face gave me the creeps.

  “Marissa, what have you done?”

  “Nothing, Mommy. I didn’t do anything. That girl in my class just doesn’t like me, and that’s why she told our teacher that big fat lie.”

  “You stay here while I go in to speak to your principal.”

  “Okay, Mommy,” she said, and started swinging her legs back and forth again.

  The secretary whose desk was just in front of where Marissa was sitting told me I could go right in to see Ms. Keller.

  “Please come in and have a seat,” Ms. Keller offered, and I closed the door behind me.

  “She keeps saying she didn’t do anything,” I began.

  “I know, but when she kept insisting that the other student was lying, I asked her to let me see both her hands, and when I sniffed them, I definitely smelled sulfur.”

  “I just don’t understand why she’s done this.”

  “Neither do I, but you have to get her in to see a child psychiatrist, and soon. I can even recommend one if you need me to.”

  “Yes. I would appreciate that.”

  Ms. Keller flipped through her Rolodex and wrote down a name and phone number. “There’s something else I think you should know, too.”

  “Yes?”

  “When the other little girl left my office to go back to class, she walked past where Marissa is sitting right now and my secretary heard Marissa whispering that she was going to set her hair on fire for telling on her.”

  I wanted to respond to Ms. Keller. I wanted to say something, anything, but I was too numb to force any words from my mouth. Still, though, the truth remained. My daughter was sick. She had mental issues that needed to be addressed as soon as possible, and I had to do whatever I could to help her.

  “Mrs. Black, have you witnessed any other incidents like this at home?”

  “No,” I lied quickly, my tone straightforward.

  “Have you noticed anything different about her at all?”

  “Like what?”

  “Well, for example, I believe her teacher told you at the last parent-teacher conference that Marissa pretty much stays to herself and that she’s not very well liked by the other children.”

  “Yes, she did, but not every child is outgoing or wants to play around all the time. Marissa is very mature for her age, and her maturity has always been a problem for her when she’s around other children.”

  “This is true, and she’s also extremely intelligent, but her social skills are not where they need to be.”

  I knew she was telling the truth about Marissa, but still, as her mother, I was offended. I was offended because even though I knew Marissa was strange, I didn’t appreciate hearing anyone else point this out to me.

  “I’ll talk to her,” I said, refusing to continue our discussion.

  “I hope everything works out with the psychiatrist, and please let me know if I can be of any further assistance.”

  When I left Ms. Keller’s office, I pulled Marissa out of the chair and we walked outside the school. I did believe all that Ms. Keller had told me, but still I lifted Marissa’s hands and took a whiff of her fingers to see for myself. They did in fact smell like matches, but Marissa just stared at me like she didn’t understand what I was doing. She stared at me strangely and then finally said, “Mommy, can we stop at McDonald’s to get some French fries and a shake?”

  “No. And I want you to tell me where you got those matches from and why you were playing with them.”

  “But I told you, I didn’t do anything. I didn’t.”

  “Then why do your fingers smell like matches?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Don’t you know you could have set the whole school on fire, and that if you keep doing things like this, the authorities will come and take you away from us?”

  I’d told her this to try and prevent any near-future disasters, and from the terrified look on her face, I could tell I had her attention.

  “But I didn’t do anything,”

  “And since we’re on the subject, why are you always so mean to Matthew, and why do you speak so nasty to me all the time?”

  “I don’t.”

  “You do, Marissa.”

  “No I don’t. I’m always nice to Matthew, and Mommy, I love you so much,” she said, hanging on to my arm as we headed toward the car. She was so full of deception that I could barely stand her and I couldn’t wait to get her home. I couldn’t wait to send her to her bedroom so I wouldn’t have to deal with her. If I could, I would lock her away forever.

  Chapter 17

  CHARLOTTE

  “Baby, please call me as soon as possible,” I said, leaving a voice message for Curtis.

  Marissa and I had arrived home about an hour ago, and right after calling the psychiatrist and scheduling an appointment for Marissa on Friday, two days from now, I’d decided it was time to tell Curtis what was going on. Not about the potential paternity catastrophe, but I would tell him everything else.

  I went into the laundry room where Tracy was. I’d confined Marissa upstairs as planned, partly as punishment and partly because I wanted to speak to Tracy in private.

  “I know I don’t usually bother you with our fa
mily problems, but I really need to talk to you about Marissa,” I said, and she laid a stack of towels on the dryer.

  “Sure, Ms. Charlotte, what is it?”

  “Marissa was caught playing with matches, and not very long ago I caught her doing the same thing with the stove.”

  Tracy covered her mouth and shook her head.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Ms. Charlotte, all I can hope is that you don’t fire me for not saying anything before today, but for some time now I’ve thought that maybe something wasn’t quite right with Marissa.”

  “And why is that?”

  “Well, there have been a few small incidents, but the one that worried me the most was this summer when the new little neighbor girl down the street came over to play with her and I just so happened to be coming out of one of the guest bedrooms and walked past Marissa’s room. Her door was cracked, and what made me stop to listen was when I heard her tell the little girl that she looked like a gorilla and that her parents were going to give her away to the zoo. But the worst part was when she started poking the little girl with a sharp pencil and the little girl started crying.”

  I shook my head in horror.

  “So I had no choice but to go in and stop her,” Tracy continued. “I told Marissa that what she was doing wasn’t nice, but she ran over to me and said that they were only playing a game and that the little girl had asked her to poke her. So I asked the little girl if that was true, and at first she didn’t say anything but then she’d looked at Marissa and then told me that she had asked to be poked.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me about this?”

  “Because I didn’t think it was my place and I guess I was hoping that this was a one-time situation.”

  “But you said there were other smaller incidents.”

  “Yes, like some of the things she says to Matthew, but I just figured it might be your everyday sibling rivalry. And Ms. Charlotte, please don’t take this the wrong way, but sometimes she acts as though she hates you. And I don’t know any five-year-olds who hate their mothers.”

  “I can’t believe you kept all of this from me, Tracy. Not after being here with us all this time.”