Love & Lies

by Kimberla Lawson Roby

  I’d told them exactly what I was looking for, and before I’d hung up, one of the representatives had told me they’d be pulling a list of candidates together and then faxing them over to me. I, of course, couldn’t wait, and I was hoping to start interviewing before the end of the week.

  Before I’d finished folding the first set of clothing, the phone rang and I rushed back to the kitchen because I’d also called Marissa’s doctor and was hoping that’s who was calling me back.

  “Hello?”

  “How are you?”

  It was Larry and now I was sorry I’d even answered.

  “What is it I can do for you?”

  “I want my other seventeen hundred dollars.”

  “It’s not going to happen.”

  “Oh, I think it will. Either that, or I’ll be paying Curtis a visit when he gets home. And you know he won’t like hearing that you gave me his favorite cross as a gift and that you did it just to hurt him.”

  “Larry, you know that’s not true. You took that cross the same as you took everything else, because there is no way I would have voluntarily given it to you.”

  “I’m sorry, sweetheart, but that’s not how I remember it. As a matter of fact, I can’t wait to tell ole Curtis how once you dropped off the children in Chicago, you invited me back over on Saturday so we could get our freak on. And it won’t be hard for him to believe my version of the story once I describe every detail of his bedroom and tell him how you couldn’t wait to undress me.”

  I listened to Larry go on and on until finally I dropped down in the chair closest to me. I listened but at the same time I tried to figure my next move and I decided that no matter what Larry said, it would all come down to either Curtis believing some crackhead or he would instead believe me.

  “It’s your word against mine and I’m not giving you any more money.”

  “Look, bitch, I need that money,” he yelled. “I need it right now.”

  “Why, Larry?” I took a chance on asking. “What do you need it for? Drugs?”

  “You seem like a pretty smart girl, so what do you think?”

  “Curtis was right about you all along.”

  “Bet you wish you had listened to him. But since you didn’t, I need that money.”

  “Well, I’m not giving it to you, and if I were you, I would leave town while I’m still able.”

  “So you really don’t think Curtis will believe my story, huh?”

  “He won’t.”

  “You’re sure about that?”

  “Positive.”

  “Not even once I tell him the exact time he called you on Saturday night? Because if my memory serves me correctly, it was 7:27 P.M. on the head, and all he’ll have to do is check his outgoing call history to confirm what I’m saying. Plus I think my story will be even more convincing once I repeat your whole conversation with him, word for word. So for the last time, I need my money.”

  I closed my eyes and set the phone down on the table for a few seconds. I did this because I knew Larry had his whole scheme mapped out to a T and wouldn’t hesitate to do all that he said he would do. But the thing was, I’d already been down this blackmail road a few years back with Aaron and I’d learned the hard way that all the lying, conspiring, and plotting I’d done had only made things worse. I’d learned this because in the end, Curtis had discovered all of my skeletons. Maybe not the paternity test, thank God, but he’d definitely found out about everything else.

  “Maybe you think this is some sort of game,” he said. “And you need me to show you in person that it isn’t.”

  “Curtis will be here any minute,” I said, even though I knew he wouldn’t be home for another three or four hours.

  “Then I suggest you head out to the bank before then.”

  “No,” I said, staying my course.

  “No? Okay, fine. But just know that I’ll be having a nice long chat with Curtis before the day is out.”

  “Good-bye, Larry,” I said.

  But even when I’d hung up, I didn’t move. I’d remained at the table and it wasn’t until the phone rang again that I wondered how much time had passed by.

  I pressed the button on the cordless, but when I heard a dial tone, I realized it was my cell phone. So I reached over and pulled it out of my purse.

  “Hello?”

  “Hi, baby.”

  “Aaron, why are you calling me?” I asked, my nerves already racing.

  “Because I want to speak to my daughter.”

  “Aaron, if you call here again—”

  “You’ll what? Tell Curtis?”

  “Why can’t you just accept that you and I don’t have a child together?”

  “You should just be glad I haven’t called your home number, and the only reason I haven’t is because I’m trying to give you an opportunity to leave Curtis and bring my daughter to Michigan without him knowing. You can even bring Matthew, too, because it’s not like Curtis is his real father, anyway.”

  “You’re sick.”

  “No, I just want what’s mine. I want my daughter and I’ll do whatever I have to to see her.”

  “Why can’t you just—” I began, but he interrupted me.

  “My doctor is coming down the hallway, but I’ll be in touch with you again real soon. Bye, baby.”

  For the life of me, I didn’t want to believe this was happening. Not back-to-back, all in one hour. But the fact of the matter was, I clearly wasn’t dreaming, and I was glad I’d already decided what I was going to tell Curtis regarding Larry.

  For the first time in a long while, I was going to tell him the truth.

  At least most of it, anyway.

  Chapter 23

  CHARLOTTE

  Curtis had just called to say he was about twenty minutes from our house, but now I was on the phone with Dr. Mason, describing Marissa’s latest episode.

  “We can definitely get her in tomorrow for another appointment.”

  “Is there some sort of medication you can prescribe for her? Because I just don’t see how we can go on with her the way she is.”

  “That’s a tough question, because even though she does show signs of social withdrawal, flattened emotions, and irrational behavior, I’m still not sure prescribing antipsychotic medication is the answer. Not to mention my other hesitation stems from the fact that only one in forty thousand children are affected by schizophrenia, and this is what that category of meds are used for.”

  “Well, Doctor, something is definitely wrong with her. It’s almost as if she has two personalities, and you never know which Marissa is going to show up.”

  “She’s very good at concealing her feelings, but the reason I was able to pick up on at least a touch of instability was because no matter what we talked about, her emotions remained the same. She kept the same upbeat tone of voice and smile, even when there was nothing for her to smile about. Her whole disposition seemed more like a cover-up, and I could see how most people would never notice it unless they were paying close attention.”

  “I can’t tell you how much it hurts knowing that your child isn’t normal.”

  “I understand, but I promise I’ll do everything I can to help her.”

  “Thank you.”

  “Also, I know you answered no on the patient questionnaire regarding any family history of mental illness, but are you sure there isn’t anyone you can think of? Either on your side or your husband’s?”

  “No.”

  “Because if she does have some form of psychosis, this would at least help explain why she’s showing symptoms at such a young age.”

  “As far as I know, neither her father nor I nor any of our family members has ever had problems like this.”

  I felt bad because even though I was telling the truth about Curtis’s medical history and mine, I couldn’t stop thinking about Aaron or his phone call to me this morning. If only I could come clean, Dr. Mason might be in a much better position to help Marissa, but I just couldn’t bring my
self to do it. I just couldn’t fathom the idea of crazy Aaron being the father of my child.

  “I just thought I’d double-check.”

  “Is there a certain time you’d like me to bring her in tomorrow?” I said, changing the subject.

  “Normally I would just have you schedule with my secretary but since I have my calendar right here, let’s go with, say, four o’clock?”

  “That’ll be fine, because that way she won’t have to miss any school.”

  “We’ll see you then.”

  “Thanks so much.”

  I nestled my body against the sofa in the family room and didn’t move a muscle. I was so tired of dealing with one problem after another, tired of lying at a moment’s notice, tired of hiding truths that were critical to the people I loved. Lying had slowly but surely become a comfortable and normal way of life for me, but over the last few days, particularly after Larry’s visit on Saturday, I’d been thinking how it was finally time to put an end to it. I knew I wouldn’t be able to confess all my secrets all at once, but I was hoping to make at least a small start this afternoon. Actually, I would get my chance in a few minutes, because Curtis was now entering the house.

  I got up and went over to greet him.

  “Hey, baby,” he said, kissing me, and I was dumbfounded. I didn’t understand why he seemed happy and content, not when Marissa had told him about Larry being over here two days in a row.

  I looked at him strangely, but once he’d thanked the limo driver and closed the door, he embraced me again and for some reason I burst into tears.

  “This is about that Larry situation, isn’t it?” he asked.

  “Curtis, I am so sorry. I made a terrible, terrible mistake and I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you.”

  We walked into the family room, Curtis with his arm around me, and we took a seat. Then I shed more tears.

  “Baby, we’ve all made mistakes, and as long as you’ve now cut all ties with Larry, I’m going to forget about this.”

  “But there’s more.”

  “Like what?”

  At first I paused when I thought about the woman Mr. Perry had seen Curtis with at the airport, but actually, if he would forgive me for what I was about to tell him, then I would be willing to forgive him as well. Although my forgiving him would be totally contingent on Curtis’s agreement never to see her again.

  “I don’t even know where to begin.”

  Now Curtis was silent, and I knew he was wondering how severe my news was going to be.

  “Having Larry over wasn’t the only thing that happened.”

  “Wait a minute. You didn’t sleep with him, did you?”

  “No. Absolutely not. But I did give him two thousand dollars, and then on Saturday night he came back over here threatening me. He was here when you called and he pulled a knife on me.”

  “What? Did you call the police?”

  “No.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I let him in voluntarily.”

  “I don’t believe this,” he said, standing and walking toward the fireplace.

  “And, Curtis, that’s not all.”

  “Well, what else could there be?”

  “He took some of my jewelry and…your cross.”

  “He what?!”

  “I know, baby, but there was no way I could stop him.”

  “See, that’s the very reason I told you he wasn’t welcome here.”

  “I know and I’m sorry.”

  Curtis groaned with anger.

  “Okay, look,” he finally said. “Maybe if we convince Larry that we’re going to have him arrested, he’ll tell us where he pawned everything, because I guarantee you that’s exactly what he did so he could get money for drugs.”

  “If he did, then I think he already spent the money, because he called here today in a rage trying to get more.”

  I watched Curtis sit back down next to me, but his calm nature wasn’t adding up. He was too relaxed and too understanding about all of this, and it was so unlike him.

  “Actually, I have something to tell you, too, and as much as I hate to say it, you’re not going to like it.”

  “Okay,” I said, relieved that he had decided on his own to tell me about his mistress and that she was now completely out of his life.

  “I wanted to tell you this when I came home last Friday, but no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t do it.”

  I didn’t know what to say so I didn’t respond.

  “I’ve been having an affair on you for five years now.”

  Again, I didn’t say anything, but his words were killing me. I’d known he was seeing someone but I’d had no idea he’d been doing it since Marissa was born.

  “Her name is Tabitha,” he continued. “And for the most part, she’s been traveling with me the entire time to almost every city I’ve gone to.”

  “Curtis, no,” I said, my eyes tearing up again, because what he was telling me was that this Tabitha person had spent more time with him than I had.

  “But the thing is, I’ve been trying to break it off with her. Honest. But she’s not having it.”

  “Why can’t you just tell her it’s over and leave it at that?”

  “Because, baby, she’s pregnant, and she’s threatening to go public with it.”

  “Pregnant?” I thought I heard myself say, but I wasn’t sure because I was now having an out-of-body experience. I was devastated, to say the least, and now I knew why last week Curtis had had this sudden change of heart. I now knew why he’d treated me so kindly and why he was so adamant about saving our marriage.

  “Being with her all these years was completely irresponsible, but I was so hurt over you being with Aaron. I was so hurt that every time I was with Tabitha I felt justified and like you deserved what you were getting. But now I know I was wrong.”

  I heard my cell phone ring and went into the kitchen to get it.

  “Hello?”

  “Mrs. Black.” It was the private investigator.

  “I know your husband is probably home, but can you talk?”

  “Yes. Go ahead.”

  “I followed his limo to the woman’s residence when they dropped her off, and her name is Tabitha Charles. He was there with her for about an hour, but in the meantime I had my assistant do a title search.”

  “And?”

  “The house is in her name and your husband’s. But it’s only been that way for the last three years, because before that she owned it with another man with the same last name as hers, possibly her husband. I don’t know that for sure, but I’ll definitely find out.”

  Now I knew what it felt like to have your heart ripped straight from your chest.

  “I really appreciate you calling, and actually there’s no need to find out anything else.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes,” I said, because if there was more news, I didn’t want to hear it.

  “I think your retainer will cover just about everything, then, but I’ll send you an invoice either way.”

  “Thanks so much for everything.”

  “Call again anytime,” he said, and I closed my phone.

  “Who was that?” Curtis asked when I returned to the sofa.

  “The private investigator I hired to follow you.”

  “Then you already knew?” he said.

  “Yes, but I didn’t know she was pregnant, and until a few minutes ago I didn’t know you’d gone behind my back and purchased a house with her.”

  “It wasn’t like that.”

  “Then how exactly was it, Curtis?”

  “She and her husband got a divorce, and even though the judge ordered her husband to pay alimony, he told her that within two years she would either have to sell it or pay him his half of the equity. So I helped her by signing a new loan and then she was able to pay what she owed him.”

  “Gosh, you’re actually having a baby with another woman,” I said without realizing it. “I can’t believe you let this
happen to us.”

  “I know, and baby, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I don’t know what to do, and I promise you this will never happen again,” he said, taking one of my hands with both of his. “We’ve both had affairs and hurt each other in more ways than one, and I don’t want to go on like this. I’m finally ready to commit to you forever, and I give you my word that you won’t ever have to worry about me being with any more women.”

  “So what is this Tabitha wanting from you?”

  “At first she kept pressing me about leaving you and marrying her, but when I told her I would never do that, she said she wanted money.”

  “How much?”

  “Fifty thousand dollars’ cash and then twenty percent of my income for child support.”

  “How did she come up with that?”

  “According to her, that’s what the percentage is in Illinois for one child.”

  “And you know for sure she’s pregnant?”

  “Well, yeah.”

  “How many months is she?”

  “Three.”

  “So she’s not showing yet?”

  “No, but neither did you in your first trimester.”

  “I want to see proof, and if she is pregnant, you might as well tell her that you want a blood test.”

  “But if she is, then I already know it’s mine.”

  “How?”

  “Because I know she hasn’t been with anyone else.”

  “All of this is making me sick,” I said, pulling away from Curtis. I knew my situation with Aaron hadn’t been much different, but this baby news was tearing me apart.

  “We have to keep her quiet because the last thing we need is another scandal.”

  “This is pathetic.”

  “I’m already helping her pay her mortgage and utilities, but I know she’s going to expect more as time goes on.”

  “Well, that’s too bad, because she’s not getting another dime until we prove that she’s really pregnant.”

  “She’ll never go for that.”